• Most Topular Stories

  • New Advertisement For Walmart

    Regretful Morning
    27 Mar 2015 | 4:00 pm
    We have scooters for every person who needs one (by need we mean fat and... Read More
  • And that’s why I don’t trust hypnotists

    The Bloggess
    26 Mar 2015 | 7:26 am
    One of my friends went to a hypnotist to stop smoking and it made me think that I need to find a hypnotist to hypnotize me into thinking that I’m doing a good job in life. But then I started worrying that maybe I’d already used a hypnotist to make me think that I was doing okay but that the hypnotism has just worn off.  And if that’s true then I should I find the hypnotist and ask for my money back, but I can’t because I don’t remember going to see a hypnotists.  And that sort of makes sense because if he’s a really good hypnotist he probably…
  • The Wonder Years
    28 Mar 2015 | 11:47 pm
    “During the ages of 8 to 11 years old (1972 to 1975) I became trapped in a vortex of awkwardness. And my mom’s taste in clothing really brought it to another level – this stuff was embarrassing even back then. I honestly don’t know how to chose which pictures to send because it seems each one was worse than the last. But here are the two best , age 8 from 1972 and age 10 from 1974.” (submitted by Brad) “During the ages of 8 to 11 years old (1972 to 1975) I became trapped in a vortex of awkwardness. And my mom’s taste in clothing really brought it to…
  • 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!

    Barb Best
    Barb Best
    27 Feb 2015 | 7:00 am
      No kidding. 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!      OOPS! I’m Not Breathing. Why Not? You May Ask… I forgot My damn bra is too tight I need an APP for that Too much in love Screw it, it’s a Snow Day No Post-It note that says “breathe!” Scared to death, no iPhone reception […] The post 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe! appeared first on Barb Best.
  • LOL Pics!

    17 Mar 2015 | 2:11 pm
    Funny pics dump of awesome LOL…  
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    The Bloggess

  • Ho ho ho. Green ballsack.

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:20 am
    I was just wondering if the Jolly Green Giant was made of vegetables, because if so it seems sort of cruel to make him a spokesperson for eating vegetables.  I looked it up and it urns out that the original Jolly Green Giant was neither “jolly” nor “green” and was actually some sort of angry caveman in a bearskin loincloth which just gave me more questions. But I did find out that there’s an enormous, 55-foot statue of him where it seems like it would be almost impossible to not stare up at his ball sack.  Then I was like, why am I thinking about the…
  • And that’s why I don’t trust hypnotists

    26 Mar 2015 | 7:26 am
    One of my friends went to a hypnotist to stop smoking and it made me think that I need to find a hypnotist to hypnotize me into thinking that I’m doing a good job in life. But then I started worrying that maybe I’d already used a hypnotist to make me think that I was doing okay but that the hypnotism has just worn off.  And if that’s true then I should I find the hypnotist and ask for my money back, but I can’t because I don’t remember going to see a hypnotists.  And that sort of makes sense because if he’s a really good hypnotist he probably…
  • Stop reading.

    24 Mar 2015 | 9:26 am
    Stop reading this right now. Seriously.  Stop it. You can’t stop, can you? Or can you?  Have you stopped?  If you have, I’m applauding you.  You can’t hear it because you’ve stopped reading but trust me, you are awesome.  And you know what else you are?  You are a LIAR.  Because you are still reading.  You’re still reading because you don’t listen to authority and you’re not about to let some stupid-ass warning keep you from doing whatever it is you want to do.  And you know what?  I am with you. WE’LL READ WHATEVER WE WANT TO AND NO…
  • Jesus. The google searches I’m going to get for this one…

    22 Mar 2015 | 1:21 pm
    Facebook just suggested I wanted to see a story entitled: “Man arrested for breaking into funeral home to perform sexual act on female corpse” My first thought was, “YOU DON’T KNOW ME, FACEBOOK.  That is NOT the kind of weird shit I want to know about and I really don’t appreciate what you’re implying.” My second though was a mental image of a man performing a strip-tease while standing on a corpse, but I’d guess that’s not what happened.  I don’t know for sure because I didn’t click through.  I think it’s the…
  • There should be a yelp for places you visit in your sleep.

    18 Mar 2015 | 10:45 am
    Do you ever have dreams so real and bizarre that you are certain you must’ve actually been somewhere that exists because there is no way that place came from your head? Because I have them sometimes and it’s very odd, and I always want to reach out and say, “Hey, has anyone else been to that safari-style petting zoo that was deserted 100 years ago because of a radiation leak?  The one with the sad, balding wolves as big as bears who look at you with desperate eyes?  The one where the unnaturally thick and muscular 8-foot flamingoes have taken over as the dominant alpha…
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    Damn You Auto Correct!

  • No Wonder He Bit You

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:00 pm
      Submitted by gnocchi My bird and my phone hate me. The post No Wonder He Bit You appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • That’s How Rumors Start

    29 Mar 2015 | 5:00 pm
      Submitted by Sam The post That’s How Rumors Start appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • Best Ever!

    29 Mar 2015 | 3:00 pm
      Submitted by Josh The post Best Ever! appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • Holy Ribs

    29 Mar 2015 | 1:00 pm
      Submitted by Ellen The post Holy Ribs appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • Supermarket Finds

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:00 am
      Submitted by Samantha The post Supermarket Finds appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
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  • Coffee Shop Algebra by Allen Rein

    27 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    3x = 2yWhere x is the number of baristas in suspenders, and y is how long, in minutes, your single origin, fair trade, pour-over will take to handcraft.1/x = yWhere x is the number of people ahead of you placing office orders from Post-its, and y is a fractional representation of your will to live.x = yWhere x is the percentage of furniture made from reclaimed driftwood, and y is the approximate cost, in cents, of a single pump of pumpkin spice.4 + x = yWhere x is the number of times you’ve asked an employee of a non-Starbucks coffee shop for a “grande,” and y is the number of ways…
  • Open Letters: An Open Letter to the Braxton-Hicks Contractions That Hit a Student in My First Period 10th Grade English Class by Mr. Dickson

    27 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    Dear Braxton-Hicks Contractions,First off, screw you. I was in the middle of a really tiresome morning—before class started, the school secretary told me a parent called to get confirmation or denial on the rumor that the Creative Writing teacher (me) was teaching sections of 50 Shades of Gray as examples of popular fiction. My irritation for this wasn’t completely faded when the bell rang to start class, and then you showed up. Thanks. (I’m not teaching that, by the way. If I’m going to teach smut, I’ll at least find some artful smut. Here’s looking at you, Robert Herrick!)But…
  • List: Things My Love Life and My Writing Career Have in Common by Samantha Edmonds

    27 Mar 2015 | 3:59 am
    Motivation issuesSuccess contingent on the opinion of othersNo concept of plotShow don’t tell, goddammitRejection letters so numerous personalized ones are considered victoriesSex in exposition, but never in scene, if you know what I meanFeeling as if I’m consistently celebrating others’ successesInability to finish the long project and the tendency to stick with shorter worksThat one I keep coming back to no matter how many times I walk awayMy mother just doesn’t seem to get it
  • An Honest College Rejection Letter by Mimi Evans

    26 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    Dear Applicant,The Admissions Committee has carefully considered your application and we regret to inform you that we will not be able to offer you admission in the entering class of 2015, or a position on one of our alternate lists. The applicant pool this year was particularly strong, and by that I mean the Admissions Committee once again sent candidates like you multiple enticing pamphlets encouraging you to apply, knowing full well we had no intention of accepting you.However, you will be pleased to know that you have contributed to our declining admissions rate, which has helped our…
  • List: Things a Man MUST Do Before the Age of 30! by Mike Sacks and Ted Travelstead

    26 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    Eat a super-sized Mexican meal in an airport food court—black beans, saffron rice, dollop of sour cream, pineapple-flavored soda—just before smuggling 40 wax-coated balls of hashish in your tummy on that 22 hour trip to Bangladesh.Insist on a raise. And then a job.Show up at your high school principal’s retirement condo and pinch a loaf in front of his doorway because it’s “Spring Prank Time.”Adopt a homeless drifter and dress him as Radar from the syndicated situation comedy M*A*S*HNickname your testicles “Tweedledee” and “Tweedledum”Squirt milk into the mouths of a…
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    Predator Press

  • Mutt

    Michael Wolfe
    17 Mar 2015 | 3:07 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press "Of course I'm Celebrating Saint Patrick's Day," says Cindy.  "I'm Irish.  Don't you care about heritage?" "Pthbtt," I says.  "If any our 'heritages' were worth a shit, our ancestors wouldn't have come to America in the first place."
  • Knox

    Michael Wolfe
    10 Feb 2015 | 3:58 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press First I need to apologize to Stephanie Barr, who actually commented on the post "Sisyphus" --a post I promptly deleted. Long story short, about ten days ago I heard from my dad for the first time in a decade, and by osmosis got some contact from other lost relatives and siblings. I've sort of inferred dad's health is in decline, but I'm not sure anybody was aware of the fact that dad found me. What ensued became quickly toxic, as I was accused of conveniently showing up by people already dividing his estate. Worse, most of this was spilling out on my Facebook account. I…
  • TurtleGate

    Michael Wolfe
    25 Jan 2015 | 4:51 am
    LOBO -Predator Press "Moriarty didn't commit suicide, you moron" Rachel explains.  "Morry is a tortoise.  Tortises live on land." "Well you're certainly not making me feel any better about this whole fiasco," I says, pushing on Morry's chest rhythmically.  "This is a consequence of God's spurious equivocation when it comes to Creation." "You're blaming God for drowning Morry?" "I mean it's not like we see fish walking around downtown," I says, slamming my fist into the inverted carapace.  "I figured this would be a major upgrade for him." Morry suddenly hacks, and ...
  • The Shart Begins

    Michael Wolfe
    4 Jan 2015 | 8:47 am
    LOBO -Predator Press "Why does Bruce Wayne keep all this cool Batman memorabilia down in this cave?" I ask.  "Won't it get moldy or something?" Stephanie Barr, at the Batputer, rolls her eyes.  Pulling up BatGoogle, she has Banksy's BatWikipedia profile in seconds.  "Why," she counters, "Are you so ardent about finding this artist?" "Bruce Wayne made me a cool costume," I says.  "It makes me look like I have pectorals." Nose-to-nose with an amazing Batsuit, I whistle involuntarily. "Man this Wayne guy must be the shit at Comic Con."

    Michael Wolfe
    3 Jan 2015 | 12:07 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press "I'm not exactly certain why I'm here," I admit to Mr. Wayne.  "Shit I didn't even know this room existed before now.  You Human Resources people really go 'all out.'" Wayne eyes me over a stack of documents.  "You and Lois Lane flew to Gotham last month as company representatives," he says. O shit. Wayne leans back in his chair.  "Would you care to explain to me what happened?" I pour a glass of water from the pitcher to give myself time to think carefully.  Living in quiet dread of this conversation, one might expect me…
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    Funny or Die | Funny Videos, Funny Video Clips, Funny Pictures

  • Advice For 2-Month-Olds: While We're Young Interviews

    27 Mar 2015 | 1:51 pm
    Advice For 2-Month-Olds: While We're ... 2:52 Matt Zaller sits down with the cast of 'While We're Young' to find out what advice they may have for their 2-year-old selves. Scoops achieved: Ben Stiller sucks his friends' thumbs. Adam Horovitz thinks his 2-month-old self is an asshole. Amanda Seyfried's mom hates her. And Noah Baumbach knows nothing about 2-month-olds. While We're Young hits theaters 3/27. Submitted by: TheZaz Regular Keywords: ben stiller noah baumbach amanda seyfried adam horovitz ad-rock matt zaller while we're young interviews Views: 2,187
  • First Look: 16 Photoshopped Puns Of Jesse Eisenberg's Name

    27 Mar 2015 | 10:07 am
    First Look: 16 Photoshopped Puns Of J... After Entertainment Weekly released the first look of Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor, we managed to get our hands on these never-before-seen Photoshopped puns of Jesse Eisenberg's name. Submitted by: jasonflowers Regular Keywords: jesse eisenberg photoshops jesse eisenberg lex luthor jesse eisenberg jesse eisenberg batman v superman jesse eisenberg puns photoshop puns celebrity pun names Views: 22,131
  • Affordable Spring Break Alternatives

    27 Mar 2015 | 9:44 am
    Affordable Spring Break Alternatives Spring Break has gotten way too expensive. Here are 10 places you can go for a week that are way cheaper. Submitted by: mikescollins Regular Keywords: spring break affordable spring break cheap spring break cheaper spring break april march nassau bahamas bermuda island tropical college vacation cheap vacation inexpensive vacation spring breakers spring break forever Views: 53,132
  • Do NOT Ask Will Ferrell About Professor Feathers

    Jenny Nelson
    27 Mar 2015 | 7:05 am
    Do NOT Ask Will Ferrell About Profess... Conan O'Brien asks Will Ferrell prying questions about his personal life and cockatoo friend. Submitted by: Jenny Nelson Worthy Keywords: Will Ferrell Conan Will Ferrell cockatoo Will Ferrell Professor Feathers Professor Don Feathers Conan Professor Don Feathers Will Ferrell bird Conan Conan O'Brien Will Ferrell Views: 95,197
  • The Monsters Of A Rapidly Changing Media Landscape

    26 Mar 2015 | 11:45 pm
    The Monsters Of A Rapidly Changing Me... 2:49 The Monsters of a Rapidly Changing Media Landscape invite you to this once-in-a-lifetime speaking event. Submitted by: chris_singel Regular Keywords: New Media social media old media very strange time rapidly changing media landscape media jargon media garbage media lingo hulu gauge tv success really trying to figure out mobile mobile content marketing social event promotion social event marketing grab viewer awareness Views: 5,868
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    vintage everyday

  • An elevated view of the intersection at Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street, NYC, 1918

    John VE
    30 Mar 2015 | 12:05 am
    (Kadel & Herbert/National Geographic Society/Corbis)
  • 25 Captivating Color Photographs of Jackie Kennedy in India in March 1962

    John VE
    29 Mar 2015 | 1:37 pm
    First lady Jacqueline Kennedy arrived in New Delhi on March 12 for a nine-day visit. Mrs. Kennedy’s first engagement was a visit to the Central Secretariat, where she watched Indian President Rajendra Prasad ride by in state after opening a new session of Parliament. The first lady spent two days at Prime Minister Jawaharlal Nehru’s house with him and his daughter, Indira Gandhi. Mrs. Kennedy conveyed President John F. Kennedy’s greetings and his pleasure that Mrs. Kennedy could return the visits of Nehru and Mrs. Gandhi to the United States the previous year. Accompanied by her sister,…
  • Stunning Pictures Show the Changing Face of New York in the 1940s-50s and Now

    John VE
    29 Mar 2015 | 10:10 am
    These stunning images show the changing face of New York in the middle of the 20th century and now. Old pictures taken in the 1940s and 1950s by legendary crime photographer Arthur Fellig, better known as Weegee, are shown alongside shots of the same areas captured this month, via Daily Mail Online.A man is pictured lying drunk on the ground on Center Street in a 1945 picture called 'Derelict sleeping on the sidewalk outside police headquarters' (left). A woman walks past the same engraved sign for the former Police Department on March 18 this year (rigft)A lightning bolt strikes…
  • Man in Drag, ca. 1920s

    John VE
    29 Mar 2015 | 9:05 am
    “Sometime around 1920, my great grandfather made a bet with his friends that he could put on his sister's dress, walk downtown to the photographer's studio, and get a portrait taken- without getting arrested. He won.” - Macandthecowboys/ reddit
  • 30 Beautiful Portraits of Maude Fealy from the Early 1900s

    John VE
    29 Mar 2015 | 3:42 am
    Maude Fealy was an American actress who during the early twentieth century was one of the leading ladies of the American stage. Her youthful beauty made her a popular subject for postcards, here are some of our favorites...See more »
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    View from the Cloud

  • Chapter 6 - Moving On

    22 Mar 2015 | 4:52 pm
    I remember when I was 16, sitting in the basement with my friend and making big talk about how as soon as I graduated we were going to jump in his car and move to California, just like that. We didn't need a plan, we'd figure it out when we got there.  It was an exhilarating feeling, the thought of a new adventure with endless possibilities.  There didn't seem to be any reason we couldn't do it, and succeed! But somehow things didn't work out that way.  By the time I graduated I had a job, college plans and, oh yeah... no money saved.Fast forward to one year ago, me and Charli…
  • Chapter 5 - Day Trippin... The Big Apple

    9 Mar 2015 | 6:22 pm
    One of the reasons we were drawn to this gypsy lifestyle of living on the road was because it afforded us the opportunity to see the good old U.S. of A. in intimate detail.  What better way can you explore this country's rich regional wonders than by living right smack in the middle of them for extended periods of time?! But because we have the responsibility of caring for people's pets, we can't just take off for days at a time and hope the animals don't get into trouble while we are gone, like by throwing a huge kegger for example. You just can't trust them like that. Instead, we see…
  • Chapter 4 - House Sitting 101

    16 Feb 2015 | 3:33 pm
    Charli and I get asked a lot of questions now that we are full time house sitters, such as...- What is house sitting?- How do you find houses to sit at?- Do you get paid?- Do you pay them? - Where can you do it? - Have you lost your minds?In this post I'll answer these questions and more!Let's start at the top...What is house sitting?In general, house sitting is a way for people to leave their house for an extended period of time while someone else stays there to take care of their pets and provide a "lived in" presence.  There are many aspects to a house sitting arrangement, but in our…
  • Chapter 3 - Beauty and the Beasts

    30 Jan 2015 | 6:48 pm
    I don't think there is a single definition of "house sitting" that describes all engagements, but based on what we've seen in the ads, 90% of them involve animals in one form or another... either pets, chickens, horses and yes, even ostriches.In the house we're at here in Connecticut, we have the pleasure of taking care of Mickey and Henry... two of the sweetest dogs we've ever met who LOVE to go for rides in the car and walks in the woods. AND, as if THEY aren't fun enough, we also have the pleasure of watching two adorable and VERY entertaining African grey parrots. Meet Tu-Tu and…
  • Chapter 2 - The Maiden Voyage

    18 Jan 2015 | 11:08 am
    In my last post I mentioned what inspired us to ditch everything we own and hit the road, besides the popular belief that we are experiencing a midlife crisis. Which we're not.  I think.But today I'm going to start by talking about one of the key things that is making this new lifestyle even possible for us... telecommuting.For most of the last decade my jobs have allowed me to work remotely from home, which is an amazing perk to have.  Except that it shouldn't be amazing!  It SHOULD be the norm, but that's a different topic for a different day.  The important thing is…
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    Awesomely Luvvie

  • Put A Ring On It: Scandal Episode 417 Recap

    29 Mar 2015 | 9:45 am
    I’m tardy for the pordee posting this Scandal episode recap but better later than never, right? Also, you could have read my Vulture one by now. This episode was directed by the awesome Regina King. Let’s talk about it! Michael Mischief – The Gladiators are summoned in the middle of the night, and so is Cyrus Beene. Everyone rolls into the Olivia Pope and Associates Office when Huck drags Michael (Cyrus’ paid gigolo boo) in. Dude is drunk as a skunk and Cy flips out and reminds him that the reason he is a Kept Man is to avoid all these shenanigans. Michael’s been…
  • Rihanna’s “Bitch Better Have My Money” is the Freelancer’s Freedom Anthem

    26 Mar 2015 | 12:14 pm
    The cover art for the single Bitch Better Have My Money Rihanna the Bajan Goontress just pulled a Bey and dropped a single out of the blue. It is titled “Bitch Better Have My Money” and it is clearly singing the freedom song for freelancers everywhere. She’s strumming our pain with her fingers and singing our lives with her words. YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WE SUFFER TO GET THESE INVOICES PAID??? Remember the time I had to stage a sit-in at a company who was almost 2 months late overdue on an invoice? Shit. These Net45 terms ain’t loyal and will have you eating ramen noodles…
  • Dear Nellie Andreeva and Deadline, About Your Piece on Too Much “Ethnic Casting” on TV

    25 Mar 2015 | 8:08 am
    Yesterday, Deadline’s TV editor Nellie Andreeva posted a piece titled “Pilots 2015: The Year Of Ethnic Castings – About Time Or Too Much Of Good Thing?” This headline wasn’t click-bait because it captured exactly what the writer was trying to say: that TV is getting too Black and maybe it should chill on that. It was bullshit pasta mixed with wack sauce and I was offended by it. This is why I’m writing this sternly-worded letter. Dear Nellie and Deadline, First of all, I gotta point out that the word “ethnic”, or any form of it, was used 21 times in the article. Yes, I…
  • Because Sometimes You’re a Caterpillar: Dope Video Alert

    24 Mar 2015 | 7:16 pm
    You all know how I feel about animations and illustrations and whatnot. I have been using a cartoon avatar on these interwebs for over 9 years, because I really do think they’re adorable, but also great ways to kind of make people pay attention even when they don’t realize they are. My awesome friend Franchesca (aka Chescaleigh) joined forces with the gifted Kat Blaque for a cartoon that’s dropping important truths while also being entertaining. I wanted y’all to see it because this is the type of thing you can even show your kids. LEARN EM SOMETHING. LMAO at the…
  • It’s Good to Be Kink: Scandal Episode 416 Recap

    20 Mar 2015 | 9:49 am
    People love smut and Scandal brought some sexual healing into last night’s episode. Let’s talk about it, Gladiators! Dustbuster – Abby is flipping OUT at Leo and calling him disgusting. He reminds her “I’ve been between the sheets with you. You’ve taught me some things.” OWWW I see you, Prof Abby. Whatever it is, she is PISSED about and it was nasty. She tells him she’ll fix it and ends up at Olivia’s office. Liv is rocking a black blazer with blue and grey stripes, a pattern I’ve never seen her wear. Her clothes typically reflect her state of mind…
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    Brittany, Herself.

  • A Bikini Three-Way

    23 Mar 2015 | 7:57 am
    I have gained probably 30 pounds since the very first time I wore a bikini on the internet 3 years ago. Writing a book can do that to you… I keep telling myself. You would think that would mean it’d be even harder to find one that I love and felt comfortable in… but the opposite is true. I can’t stop finding them. I have over 12 bikinis. I don’t even have 12 pairs of underwear. I have more bathing suits that underwear. I have redefined my notion of necessity. (Bikinis, wine opener, pointy tweezers, genie bra, Spotify account, tiny bottle of Frank’s Hot…
  • The Girl’s Girl

    18 Mar 2015 | 7:02 am
    Yesterday my friend Loren said something incredibly kind about me. She called me a “girl’s girl.” Someone that fights to level the girl playing field, and reminding each other that we’re on the same team and we need to look out for each other. This is Loren and I before Field Day at Camp Throwback. You can’t see it, but the backs of our shirts say “We’re The Tits.” Because we are.  This is a relatively new development in my life as a girl. Only in the past 3-4 years have I been a pro-girl kinda… girl. I mean, I guess I’ve always…
  • Fat Girl Walking Cover Reveal & Pre-Order

    3 Mar 2015 | 5:37 am
    Pinch me. I knew this was coming, that everything was rolling forward, and yet… each new step leaves me so in shock I can’t breath.(...)Read the rest of Fat Girl Walking Cover Reveal & Pre-Order (169 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the author. Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh
  • A Whole Decade

    2 Mar 2015 | 7:11 am
    I’ve been married to Andy for 10 years. If there is anything I learned from last year, our anniversaries come and go here with little pomp and circumstance. And we like it that way, because we’re tired and always forget to grab cheesy cards from the grocery store the night before.(...)Read the rest of A Whole Decade (1,080 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the author. Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh
  • The Internet is a Place. For Real.

    28 Jan 2015 | 7:11 am
    My friend Amy shared a video with me this morning about a boy named Josh who was previously bullied after losing his dad, but one day decided to open doors for people, and it changed his life. It was the typical tearjerker, emotional piano music in the background, only watch this shit on your period type of video. Don’t get me wrong, it was wonderful and totally affirming (you can watch it here), but I’m not really a touchy-feely kind of girl. I usually just smile, watch a few seconds and then click out before the waterworks start. But, about a minute into the video I was…
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  • celebwhodunit...

    29 Mar 2015 | 6:17 am
    For the third time I can remember now, this former A+ list mostly movie actress from back in the day who has been married to an A+ and A lister is having sex with a former hookup of her daughter....
  • Game of Smurfs

    29 Mar 2015 | 5:44 am
  • that face

    29 Mar 2015 | 5:43 am
  • pounding heahace?

    28 Mar 2015 | 7:19 am
  • dog vs frat boy

    28 Mar 2015 | 6:34 am
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    Boondock Ramblings

  • Most Sought-after Video Production London

    29 Mar 2015 | 10:23 pm
    For a few production companies, this business can be labeled more of a work than a creative endeavor.Movies are regarded as big businesses.Investors put hundreds of thousands, if not millions into one film project wishing to create a blockbuster that will yield millions in box office receipts.Production companies London explains that having the ideal understanding on the business nature of the entertainment industry gives you the chance of dealing with distribution studios, production partners, and financiers. There are several reasons for the establishment of video production companies.
  • Selfie Sticks Makes Every Pictures Great

    23 Mar 2015 | 12:53 am
    In our generation today, lots of mobile phones are modernizing such as mobile phones and android mobile phones with matching the latest creation, the androidselfie stick. People like doing selfie that’s precisely why many of them are having fun. It seems to be the “in”thing today. Prior to the invention of phones which has a built in camera function, we have been very fond of capturing pictures as keepsakes from a recent trip or gathering. Nowadays, our technology advancement today has created the quickest and simplified when capturing pictures. Selfie also become the latest fad among…
  • Find Support Through estate agents wolverhampton In Marketing or Renting Properties

    18 Mar 2015 | 1:11 am
    Estate agents tettenhall can definitely help you with your concern if you are intending to rent, purchase, or market a house. We help make your transaction reasonably easy, because we hold the knowledge and the best property assistance you possibly want. You will be helped by our group of experts who adhere to demanding rule of conduct with regards to property dealings. In your need of top quality service, we can promise the very best of our capability. It is a common knowledge that selling property is hard, and it demands much time and energy. Looking for the best an agent specialist on…
  • How does Non-surgical Rhinoplasty Give good results?

    16 Mar 2015 | 11:35 pm
    Many wished to have a remarkable nose that would kick up their morale. This is the key reason why there are a number of nose jobs carried out these days. However, not everyone is comfy dealing with nose job surgery. Non-surgical rhinoplasty has been made in order to have an easy way of enhancing a nose, in which you can trust if you are interested to enhance your own nose. Rhinoplasty is a surgical treatment, which is one of the most well-known techniques in UK, specifically in Wolverhampton. The procedure of this non-surgical rhinoplasty doesn’t need any operation. Moreover, the process…
  • Become familiar with How to Get the Best Branded Water

    15 Mar 2015 | 10:18 pm
    Water is a crucial part of a person’s life for we cannot live without it. One of the vital natural resources is freshwater. Everyone should be health-conscious by drinking clean, branded water. Aim for a proper living by providing your family a safe, secure drinking water. Consuming a branded water is an excellent choice given that its brand and company offers rejuvenating water of high-quality. Concerns in Getting for Promotional Bottled Water We have to be conscious of what to look for in a certain brand of water. The water should have benefits and is not detrimental for your health.
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    Nanny Goats in Panties

  • Vegetable Evangelism

    21 Mar 2015 | 4:18 pm
    Or, How a Vegetable Hater Bottomed Out and Then Saw the Truth, the Light and the Way of Anthocyanins. Have I ever told you how much I hate vegetables? I hate them THIS MUCH! That is, until recently. Something happened that has caused me to eat more vegetables in the last three weeks than I have in my entire life. Stuff I’ve never heard of, seen before or even knew existed. I had 27 meat tenderizers but never owned a garlic press. from a previous post entitled My Name is Margaret and I’m a Utensilaholic Why no garlic press before now? Because I didn’t know what one was or how…
  • Keeping the Romance Alive with “Date Night”

    18 Jan 2015 | 1:39 pm
    For date night on Saturday, me and my old man went to Bed Bath & Beyond. Got new sheets and finally, FINALLY, a Keurig coffee machine. The procrastination allowed us to invest in the brand new Keurig 2.0 (cue oooohs and ahhhhs). I’m drinking my second cup of Keurig coffee (10 oz., strong setting) this morning. Tully’s Hawaiian Blend. We brought five coupons with us to the store and when I asked what we could use them on (because the fine print said Keurig products were exempt) she said, “everything”. “Everything?” I asked, and she nodded patiently like this customer did…
  • Not Your Grandma’s Resolutions

    1 Jan 2015 | 1:43 pm
    You know what day it is, right? This is the day that the whole world comes together and says, “I wish I’d worked more”. No, wait. That’s what people say on their death bed. Or rather, what people never say on their death bed. Also? The green squigglies are telling me that “deathbed” is one word. Also? Happy New Year. If it’s not too late to declare my New Year’s resolutions, I’d like to name them here. In addition to the Word document boiler template called “New Year’s Resolutions” that provides the 3 default items, I am adding one more item: • lose weight…
  • Real Men Do It With Their Hands

    10 Dec 2014 | 1:08 pm
    Before this upcoming biblical proportion storm arrives and kills us all, I just want to tell you that I loved you and it was fun and I don’t regret anything. Except for that pink rabbit-themed hot tub party in Brother Dinklemeyer’s gazebo where we all got naked, went crazy with Instagram and lost our jobs. I regret that. I’m so embarrassed about the whole thing, bringing a fuschia rabbit. I mean really, who does that? But that’s not why I brought you here today. Today I want to talk about real men. Real men make things. They make things. With their hands. “Make” is…
  • Meet My New Buddy, Perry Mennow Paws

    25 Nov 2014 | 12:59 pm
    Have you ever sat on the cold, concrete tombstone of a stranger, just to watch a gravedigger? It’s twilight and all you can hear is the shovel cutting into the soil and the birds chirping in the trees. These gravediggers, they all seem to wear flannel plaid snap-front work shirts and muddy boots. Most have beards. They won’t tell you their name. They never talk to you no matter how much you flirt with them or compliment their cracked, dry hands. Not that I’ve ever done that. I’m just curious if you’ve ever done it. So anyway, after my recent bout with anxiety for many, many…
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    mark a rayner

  • Apocalypse Cow

    Mark A. Rayner
    25 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Never get out of the boat. Absolutely goddamn right. Unless you were going all the way. Kurtz got off the boat. He split from the whole fuckin’ program. And me? I was off the boat the same time as Kurtz. Sure, I’d been obeying orders, but my mind was gone. I was in fields of […]
  • The five second rule

    Mark A. Rayner
    20 Mar 2015 | 7:50 am
    It was the best game of zenball ever, and the crowd was wild with excitement: the whisper of butterfly wings was deafening. The Rotrovra Koan Kangaroos had just scored their first all-in kensho, and the Targenville Half-Lotus Lions replied with a double-satori. The Roos launched a full-out dharma walk, but they were unable to penetrate […]
  • The Lost PowerPoint Slides (Ides of March Edition)

    Mark A. Rayner
    15 Mar 2015 | 8:01 am
    Julius Caesar Presents: Won’t Be King (slide 5) Don’t put that diadem around my shoulders Only King in Rome is Jupiter But you can call me King outside Italy What, you got a problem with that? Spurinna the Soothsayer presents “ooooooo” (slide 1) Beware the Ides of March! Cue the spooky music! Caesar Presents “What, […]
  • Before the Internet

    Mark A. Rayner
    14 Mar 2015 | 6:21 am
    Normally, I just nod my head in agreement with xkcd, but in this case, I must take exception. Before the Internet, life was much more exciting. There were things to do — the hard way — and much to accomplish. Not to mention all the challenging people and situations we faced before the Internet was […]
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    Fun Junction

  • Herbs And Spices - Roasted Asparagus And Mushrooms

    Robert Griswold
    29 Mar 2015 | 10:11 pm
    A delicious and easy side dish can be made by tossing asparagus and mushrooms together with olive oil and rosemary. I love roasting veggies and hit on this WONDERFUL combo. You could use a Hollandaise on the side.... but why??
  • Cheese - Bobs Mexican Stuffed Chicken

    Robert Griswold
    28 Mar 2015 | 5:48 pm
    My boyfriend made me the best stuffed chicken last evening. It was so good that I crowned him a better cook than me. Serve with a small side of salsa and sour cream on the side.
  • Desserts - Maple Apple Crisp

    Robert Griswold
    27 Mar 2015 | 1:58 pm
    Sliced apples are slathered in syrup, arranged in a baking dish and covered with a wonderful crumble made from brown sugar, butter and rolled oats. The crisp is then baked and served warm with scoops of rum raisin ice cream.
  • Herbs And Spices - Eastern North Carolina Barbeque Sauce

    Robert Griswold
    14 Mar 2015 | 12:54 pm
    Piquant and spicy, this vinegar-based sauce popular in Eastern North Carolina is not for lightweights! It's great for all meats, but best on pork.
  • Desserts - Blueberry Pie

    Robert Griswold
    14 Mar 2015 | 7:21 am
    There is nothing to beat a fresh blueberry pie. It doesn't need much: sugar, a bit of cornstarch to thicken all the nice juices and cinnamon. It's perfect with fresh berries, but still mighty fine with frozen ones.
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  • Distaff Limerick

    29 Mar 2015 | 1:03 pm
    Distaff Limerick By Madeleine Begun Kane If “distaff’s” a word you forget, You needn’t search books or the net. It’s a not-so-nice mention Of gals. Comprehension Is easy. Think “dissed half.” All set?
  • Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: DECK at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

    28 Mar 2015 | 7:10 pm
    It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using DECK at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.) The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.) How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick…
  • Limerick of the Week (207)

    28 Mar 2015 | 7:07 pm
    It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Congratulations to WILL T. LAUGHLIN, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse: Will T. Laughlin: The sailors, all drunk on Jim Beam, Lie strewn below-deck. It would seem That a nuclear sub Is no place for a pub, Unless Sub Bourbon Sprawl is your scheme. And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Kirk Miller, Sue Dulley, Brian Allgar, Dave Johnson, and Will T. Laughlin. Here are their respective Honorable…
  • How I Met My Husband

    28 Mar 2015 | 2:14 pm
    My come-hither look was all that it took. Mark​ at first tried to book, but returned … on the hook. As Mark likes to say, true story: Mark spots me, already seated, while he’s walking through a half-empty Long Island Rail Road car. I smile at him. He smiles at me. And then, instead of sitting across from me, Mark keeps walking and goes into another half-empty train car. A couple of minutes later he rethinks this, turns around, comes back, and sits across from me. Seven weeks later Mark proposes, and I say yes, wondering what took him so long. (All this happened way back in…
  • Oy Vey Iz Mir! (Limerick)

    25 Mar 2015 | 3:54 pm
    Oy Vey Iz Mir! By Madeleine Begun Kane The gist of the Yiddish “oy vey” Is nothing like “hip hip hooray.” At times it is mere Annoyance that’s here, And at other times utter dismay.
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    Dilbert Daily Strip

  • Comic for March 30, 2015

    30 Mar 2015 | 4:59 pm
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  • Comic for March 28, 2015

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  • Comic for March 27, 2015

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    CAP News

  • Study: Most Can Only Name One Peter Frampton Album

    25 Mar 2015 | 4:30 am
    INDIANAPOLIS (CAP) - After more than ten albums with Humble Pie, another dozen as a solo artist, and a Grammy back in 2006, nearly two-thirds of Americans over the age of 25 still cannot name more than one Peter Frampton album, a study released yesterday showed. The National Geographic-Roper Public Affairs Annual Musical Literacy Study paints a dismal picture of the musical knowledge of the most recent graduates of the U.S. education system, although the study did find steadily improving results as respondents approached the age of 49. However, an overwhelming 80% of all respondents in the…
  • Rock And Roll Hall Again Denies Johnny Bravo

    24 Mar 2015 | 4:38 am
    NEW YORK (CAP) - They braved the cold of a New York March night to come and stand with the crowd outside the city's famed Waldorf-Astoria Hotel. They chanted their idol's name relentlessly, as sure of their impossible task as they were of his craft, his talent. They call themselves The Marcias, and this night, as on the 20 that have come and gone before, they will go home disappointed. For on this night, as on the 20 others, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame will shun Johnny Bravo. "They should just let Johnny - Greg - in," Gladys 'Marcia' Kravitz complains bitterly. A former Manson girl (she…
  • Non-Asshole Discovered On Twitter

    23 Mar 2015 | 4:08 am
    CAMBRIDGE, Mass. (CAP) - In a discovery that has reverberated throughout the "Twitterverse," researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have turned up a Twitter user who is apparently not a narcissistic asshole. "It was widely assumed that Twitter was being used exclusively by self-centered navel-gazers with an unrepentant desire to share their every thought and action with whoever would listen," said MIT Professor Ron Sharkowski, who led a six-week study of the "micro-blogging" service that allows members to communicate in 140-character tweets. "But in at least one instance…
  • Coca-Cola, Pepsi To Start Using Less Battery Acid

    11 Mar 2015 | 3:55 am
    ATLANTA (CAP) - Coca-Cola and Pepsi are changing a key ingredient to avoid being slapped with a warning label about how their drinks eat through the lining of your stomach into your internal organs. The new recipe for caramel coloring in the drinks has less sulfur dioxide, which California has added to its list of chemicals that cause, in some cases, almost instantaneous stomach explosions. But Coca-Cola says there is no health risk to justify the change; instead, they're changing the ingredient "just because." "And we certainly don't want to be subject to the requirement of a scientifically…
  • Senate Passes Keystone Lager Pipeline Bill

    10 Mar 2015 | 4:27 am
    WASHINGTON (CAP) - The United States Senate has put its stamp of approval on New legislation that calls for the construction of a pipeline between Colorado and Virginia to deliver Keystone Beer to the East Coast. If the House passes the bill, lager could begin flowing as early as next year. "How do you like that Republican-controlled Senate now?" said Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY). "Once we're funneling beer to two thirds of the nation, we should be able to pass any shit we want. "And if our constituents start sobering up, we just need to increase production," he added. "Who…
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  • Bees?

    27 Mar 2015 | 10:38 am
    Says our submitter in Melbourne: “This one is just classic — even the mistakes are soooo typical!” related: The Orchid Thief
  • Playing chicken

    23 Mar 2015 | 4:58 pm
    So, this is what happens in Jacksonville, Florida when one neighbor accuses another of harboring illegal backyard fowl: related: Cock fight! extra credit: On the backyard chicken trend []
  • No food, no farts, no drama

    13 Mar 2015 | 5:15 pm
    Spotted by Heather in P-town, Mass: related: The snotty video store clerk lives!
  • Yup, sounds like a cat.

    8 Mar 2015 | 8:43 am
    Writes our submitter in Montreal: “I’m fortunate to live upstairs from my mom, who cleans my apartment when I’m busy with projects.” Recently, however, mom declared a litter-box boycott, as she explains in the note below. related: My cat-shit crazy neighbor extra credit:
  • Well, that’s legitimately creepy.

    3 Mar 2015 | 7:25 am
    I don’t typically like to post notes submitted by the person who left them, but I made an exception for this note by Geoff in New Zealand. Writes Geoff:  ”Someone actually threw out my lunch (still in its container) within an hour of putting it in the fridge at work. It was a really nice lunch., too. I thought someone had stolen it, then, for some reason I looked in the garbage can…it was covered in coffee grounds and snotty looking tissues. I was mad. Next day I brought lunch again. I wanted to be sure no one would even think of doing it again so I wrote the note, photographed…
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  • Watch Seth Rollins Shock The World And Win The WWE Championship At Wrestlemania 31

    Chris Illuminati
    29 Mar 2015 | 8:22 pm
    Seth Rollins cashed in his Money In The Bank suitcase IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MATCH and walked out of Wrestlemania 31 with the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. CHECK OUT THE COMPLETE WRESTLEMANIA 31 RECAP
  • Wrestlemania Winners 2015 — Complete Match Results

    Chris Illuminati
    29 Mar 2015 | 8:00 pm
    WWE Need Wrestlemania 31 results? Want to know Wrestlemania 2015 winners and losers? The high spots and low lights? The WWE performers who stole the show and came up short at the biggest show of the year? Well you’ve come to the right place. RELATED: FOLLOW LIVE WRESTLEMANIA 31 UPDATES HERE Wrestlemania 31 was the first Wrestlemania event to be held in the San Francisco Bay Area and the sixth to be held in the state of California. It’s also the sixth Wrestlemania to be held in an open-air venue. This year’s event, emanating live from Levi’s Stadium in Santa…
  • Hockey Analyst Takes Puck To The Forehead, Gets His Stitches And Returns To Work In Minutes

    Chris Wedge
    29 Mar 2015 | 7:50 pm
    Screenshot I am nominating NBC Sports Network’s Brian Engblom for Employee of the Year. Tonight, the network’s hockey analyst was live at a Penguins-Sharks game in Pittsburgh when a stray puck happened to nail him in the forehead. While that’s certainly an acceptable reason to take the rest of the night off and call it a day, Engblom, in true hockey fashion, got himself stitched up and returned within minutes to finish calling the game. #HockeyTough — NHL on NBC (@NHLonNBCSports) March 30, 2015 Somebody give this man a raise. Or a helmet. Or…
  • The Rock Showed Up At Wrestlemania To Confront Triple H And Stephanie McMahon And Brought…RONDA ROUSEY?!?

    Jorge Alonso
    29 Mar 2015 | 7:37 pm
    Wwe The Authority showed up to congratulate themselves on a Wrestlemania sell out and how the fans owe them so much. The Rock took offense and then all hell broke loose. ronda2221 by gsports22 And then Ronda Rousey destroyed both Stephania McMahon and Triple H in a great Wrestlemania moment
  • This Sign Is Hanging Above The Urinal At Wrestlemania And I’m Absolutely Confused

    Chris Illuminati
    29 Mar 2015 | 6:46 pm
    BroBible So I’m at Wrestlemania, covering it live, and I stop to make pee pee and this sign catches my attention. It’s hanging in the rest room of Levi’s Stadium. Is this an issue around here? Do the concession stand lines get so long during 49ers games that people resort to drinking urinal water? Isn’t Corona Light urinal water? Please explain, west coasters…
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  • おっぱいが大きかったら良かったのに。

    19 Mar 2015 | 6:04 am
    自称Bカップです。 実際妊娠前にサイズを測ってもらった時もBカップでした。でもなんか。見た目小さくない?と毎日鏡を見るたびにガッカリ。…
  • 平和と俺得修学旅行

    22 Feb 2015 | 5:45 am
    平和と俺得修学旅行 is a post from: コミックインフィニティ
  • 巨乳と貧乳について

    18 Feb 2015 | 8:07 pm
  • 姉として弟への気持ち

    2 Feb 2015 | 1:01 am
    3歳違いの弟がいますが、父の死と共に決別しました。 弟は年が近いので、子供のころから良く喧嘩をしましたが、私が好きな音楽を一緒に楽しむようなつかず離れずの関係。 私が男っぽい性格なのでお互いに意見も言いやすいのか、仲が良いときは異常に仲良しで、一緒にライブに行ったりカラオケに行ったり、くだらないことで馬鹿笑いするような感じでした。…
  • 中学生の俺得修学旅行~奈良・京都~

    28 Dec 2014 | 5:44 pm
    私は、中学3年生の時、奈良・京都での俺得修学旅行へ行きました。 それにしても何故、中学校の俺得修学旅行というのは京都・奈良が一般的なんでしょうかね。 まだそこまで日本の歴史についても興味が沸かないのでできるのであれば高校や大学くらいで十分くらいじゃないかと思っています。 グループは男3、女3の6人グループ。 グループを決める際に、やはりトラブル発生! 私と友達は2人で一緒だったため、もう一人必要でした。…
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    Small & Big

  • Design Funny... Yes, You

    P.L. Frederick
    13 Mar 2015 | 12:30 pm
    Oh boy! It's time to stop taking graphic design so seriously.All-natural, free-range and gluten-free, Design Funny: A Graphic Designer's Guide to Humor is an entertaining yet practical guide to the lighter side of the design profession. Inside you'll find inspiration, advice and visual gags from comedy juggernauts The Onion, Comedy Central, Funny Or Die, MAD magazine, JibJab, Cheezburger, as well as dozens of top creative agencies, talented freelance designers and professional comedians.“This book is perfect for design nerds. This book is also perfect for comedy nerds.” —Emily Flake,…
  • Looking For Quirky Tees?

    P.L. Frederick
    3 Nov 2014 | 1:32 pm
    Put some cartoons on t-shirts. Fun gift idear. Take a gander at the first... ducky head angel thing at©2011 P.L. Frederick. See Small & Big for full copyright details.
  • Turn A Stupid Idea Into A Successful Humor Book [video]

    P.L. Frederick
    3 Aug 2012 | 11:00 am
    This is great. Humor writer and author Tim Bete presents: How I converted 7,000 hours of work into $10 hard cash and then turned a single stupid idea into $37,000. He discuses publishing, editors, ideas... helpful stuff for any writer. He presented at the 2012 Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop. Runs 58 minutes. Warning: Enjoy!©2011 P.L. Frederick. See Small & Big for full copyright details.
  • Rules Of Football*

    P.L. Frederick
    18 Jul 2012 | 8:20 pm
    Ball gnawing encouraged.If football rolls into a hole, anything goes; i.e., head bonkings.Should a player stand upon football, no other player may touch it EVER. (Until football standing terminates.)Transport football via mouth ONLY.Picking up the player transporting football via mouth is permitted.Batting football back and forth between forelimbs is encouraged (extra points for blurring).Each player acts as their own team; i.e. three players equals three teams.Any player wearing leash shall clothesline all players, including self.Players signal a Personal Time Out by either lying down or…
  • Help A Teenage Michael Jackson Impersonator (Keith Knight)

    P.L. Frederick
    28 Mar 2012 | 8:00 am
    Update: He did it! Keith Knight got funded for his Michael Jackson project, with the help of good people like you. In fact, on April 6, 2012 he exceeded his $40K goal.I've long appreciated Keith Knight. He's the man behind one of my favorite cartoons, Life's Little Victories. Keef is giving away three old illustration sketchbooks, he will draw you into an upcoming published cartoon, he will come to your town and present his famous slideshow (I have seen it, it is great) and cartooning workshop, he will lip sync a Michael Jackson song in your living room — all because he was a…
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    Beauty Tips For MinistersBeauty Tips For Ministers

  • Hit Your Hallelujah, Holy Week Is Upon Us

    26 Mar 2015 | 8:46 pm
    “Uptown Funk” is going to be my jam for the next while. I can’t get it out of repeat play in my brain. I LOVE the “Girls, hit your hallelujah (woo!)” refrain. Kids, hit your hallelujah. How are you walking into Holy Week? Tomororow or Saturday is the time to grab some quiet time for yourself to go over the logistics. Calm down, breathe, and focus. Run to your calendar and block out time for daily time with God. That comes first. It should always come first but we all know that other times of the year, priorities intervene. We have obligations. But please, dearly…
  • Unconstructed Jackets

    20 Mar 2015 | 5:12 pm
    Hey, hombres, I notice that a lot of you have trouble finding a professional look that’s comfortably located between formally dressed in a suit and dressed in a polo and jeans. You need to step up your non-suit professional game. Yes, you can go around trying to bring about the Kingdom of God in a fleece, but sometimes showing up for love, justice, resurrection and community needs more oomph and more visual effort. I personally don’t understand why leaders attend gatherings that aim to change the world in clothes that broadcast their identity as Comfy Pal. “I will go right…
  • PB Reviews The North Style Catalog: Upstyle Frump

    20 Mar 2015 | 4:37 pm
    Share This Hide Sites
  • The Squid Ink

    20 Mar 2015 | 10:28 am
    SisterBang had a confession she wanted to make but she was too ashamed to spill it. “Tell me,”I said in my best wheedling little sister voice. “I CAN’T,” she moaned. “It’s too hORRIBLE!” Had she murdered someone? Worn white after Labor Day? WHAT? It took awhile, but she finally managed to tell me that she had spent fifty dollars on that little pot of lip balm you see here. The photo happened after I took all the cash out of my wallet and threw it on the ungodly overpriced item. I shouted, “IT’S SO WORTH IT IT IS AMAZING IT WILL…
  • PeaceBang Reviews Deod-y-o

    17 Mar 2015 | 11:23 am
    SOME of you pigeons live in climates where the sun actually shines and warms the earth and you sweat. Some others of us find this hard to relate to, but let’s face it: we all perspire and sweat. Have you ever done one of those worship services where you take off your robe and your clothes are absolutely soaked? Isn’t that fun? I once preached an ordination in late August in Harrisburg, PA that was so hot, I could feel the sweat pouring down my legs and pooling in my shoes as I spoke. The church was not air-conditioned and although the good folks were running fans, they also used a…
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  • The Best Candle Ever – WoodWick Candles

    Jody Narantic
    25 Mar 2015 | 8:36 am
    Paid advertisement if purchasesd I burn candles a lot and the WoodWick candle has been my favorite since I first saw them years ago.  They smell wonderful!!! They burn a long time, they burn evenly, and they crackle like a fireplace when they burn. I have them all over my house and they make for … Continue reading The Best Candle Ever – WoodWick Candles →
  • The Real Signs of Menopause

    Jody Narantic
    5 Mar 2015 | 3:30 am
    This post is rated: R-MC = Rated R for Men and Children whom probably shouldn’t read. R-WM = Rated R for Women of Menopause whom should relate. After reading article after article about menopause I can’t help but think who writes this stuff? Have they seriously gone through menopause? They couldn’t have.  Are they 20?  Having … Continue reading The Real Signs of Menopause →
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    Joel Klebanoff: Stuff & Nonsense » Joel Klebanoff: Stuff & Nonsense

  • Shocking Secrets Women Don’t Want Me to Know

    Joel Klebanoff
    15 Mar 2015 | 4:18 pm
    An email arrived in my inbox today with the subject line, “Shocking Secrets Women Don’t Want You To Know.” In it, the sender, whom the “from” line tells me is named Michael (I won’t provide his last name because Michael might want to keep his likely fictitious name a secret), informed me that he “recently discovered […]Possibly Related Posts:Prehearing Times ThreeAncient PornDo-It-Yourself Solar SystemChoosing a Health Club or GymEnjoying Starbucks WiFi
  • Sole Mates

    Joel Klebanoff
    11 Nov 2014 | 8:12 pm
    I have what I think is a brilliant idea for an innovative web-based business. Notwithstanding my extreme angst over the risk of having the concept stolen by one unscrupulous jerk or another—or maybe both of them simultaneously, I want to put the notion out there for a crowd-sourced evaluation. Here it is: an online dating […]Possibly Related Posts:New SocksStarbucks RulesExercise ExcessHealthful MeditationThe Common Cold
  • Incomprehensible Contrasts: Gaza/17

    Joel Klebanoff
    23 Jul 2014 | 11:12 am
    Scientists have searched for years and billions of dollars have been expended, but there is still no cure for AIDS. There are drugs that can turn it into a chronic disease rather than a near-term death sentence. However, that is not a cure. As I understand it, it’s a life sentence of a brutal, rigorous […]Possibly Related Posts:Debunking Medical MythsNarrow MindednessAncient PornA Certain History?Insanely Religious
  • Narrow Mindedness

    Joel Klebanoff
    3 Feb 2014 | 2:22 pm
    I contend that most of us are narrow minded. As I wrote the previous sentence I had a vision of the fingers of the majority of the few people who come here immediately pouncing on their keyboards to pound out an exceptionally fervent agreement or disagreement with that statement. Or maybe they’ll get defensive and […]Possibly Related Posts:See Better Weight Loss ResultsImponderablesSun BlockHealthful MeditationThe Improbability of You
  • Imponderables

    Joel Klebanoff
    20 Jan 2014 | 2:25 pm
     There are, to say the absolutely very least, a great many phenomena in the universe that I find to be imponderable; at least not ponderable in any more than purely superficial, meaningful way. Other people may find it possible to not just ponder some of them deeply and meaningfully, but also actually understand them. I […]Possibly Related Posts:Narrow MindednessSun BlockSee Better Weight Loss ResultsA Certain History?Cornering the Web Content Market
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    Weird News FilesWeird News Files » | The Weirdest News Ever

  • The New Sensation Of Weird How To Videos

    26 Mar 2015 | 2:08 pm
    It started less than a week ago what appears to be a series of videos aimed to bring laughter but portrayed as popular how to tutorials. The videos are short as the motto and name of the channel is “How to in one minute“. This is also its key feature. The tutorials are supposed to be very short and weirdly efficient. How to in a minute The person behind these videos appears to be a young man who presents himself as Mr. How to and in all the videos he appears with a mascot monkey with sunglasses, which he calls, Mr. Minute. Weirded out yet? Well, as if all that was not enough, Mr.
  • A Drunk Micro Pig and a Doggie with a Weird Hobby

    25 Mar 2015 | 8:52 am
    When animals act like humans or display hilarious tricks, it’s a different level of weird. Well, this is especially true for a micro pig and a dog with an unusual trick. The Drunkard Ms. Piggy Meet Frances Bacon. She’s a micro pig that has been banned from downing ale in a pub. “Why?” You might ask. She was accused of head-butting other patrons because alcohol made her a bit too excited. Frances Bacon lives in the inn. She’d go down the bar and minesweeps – drinking from glasses left or given by other customers – a few glasses. Then, when she’d had one too many drinks, she’d…
  • The Woman with Gigantic Boobs and the Men Who Dig Her

    17 Mar 2015 | 10:57 pm
    Most men are known to be fond of women with larger breasts. But what if a woman’s bosom is a size 48NN? Yes, you got that right! Kristy Love is from Atlanta, Georgia. Just like other women, Kristy has body insecurities, including her breasts. However, Ms. Love didn’t let her “huge” problem hinder her from feeling sexy and alluring. In fact, she’s using her assets to earn as much as $1,300 a day. What does she do? For some, she smothers them with her humongous boobs, while others want them to whack them on the head. Kristy didn’t really dream of doing such a job. She actually…
  • Top Tips For Fashionistas At This Year’s Grand National Festival

    16 Mar 2015 | 11:55 am
    As the weather warms up, fashion-forward ladies everywhere are looking forward to what promises to be yet another exciting racing season. The long line of prestigious events kicks off with the Cheltenham Festival on 10th March, which is to include its own annual fashion parade on Ladies Day. However, without a doubt, one of the most highly anticipated events on the racing circuit is the Grand National, which is to take part at Aintree Racecourse on 11th April. Attracting the likes of all of Liverpool’s finest WAG royalty, fashion is the number one focus for the three-day Grand National…
  • Weird Festivals You Probably Won’t Believe Are Happening

    10 Mar 2015 | 6:00 pm
    Who would dare decorate some skulls, go barenaked or soak oneself to the mud just to celebrate a festival? If for others these may sound absurd, for some these have been practiced as their traditions. Here are some of these world-class events, from the unique to the downright unusual, you may consider visiting this year: Baby Jumping, Spain Newly born babies are being laid down on mattresses in the streets to prepare them for a ritual known as El Salto del Colacho (the devil’s jump) or simply El Colacho. In this act, men dressed as the Devil (known as the Colacho) jump over the infants…
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    Where the Hell Was I?

  • Radio Dazed

    25 Mar 2015 | 3:36 pm
    (Science marches on like a lion... or a lamb. Or something. Anyway, it's spring and a new week and that means a new Secondhand SCIENCE. Hop on over to learn all about glial cells, and what they have to do with Scooby Doo, training gyms and everyone's favorite mushmouthed Hollywood boxer. It's a champ!) Friends. Family members. Former coworkers. (Also, random Googling internet weirdos. In fact, probably mostly that.) Lend me your ears. (Actually, don't lend them to me, because I won't be the one talking. Or rather, I will. But I'm not the one in charge. Of your ears. Or the talking into them.
  • I'm the Guy and I Don't Know Why

    21 Mar 2015 | 1:07 pm
    (March marches on, and so does science. Namely, Secondhand SCIENCE. This week's wackiness is all about tectonic plates. It's an earth-moving experience. Probably. Check it out.) There's a troubling development at my office recently. It would seem I've become "the guy" for a thing. Now, to a point, I'm okay with that. I've been "the guy" for things before. I scrap together little bits of software for people, and cram numbers into databases sometimes. So when one of those stops working or catches someone on fire, then sure -- I'm "the guy" who has to fix it and clean up the mess and rub aloe…
  • Local Incapacity

    14 Mar 2015 | 1:06 pm
    (Spring forward -- into Secondhand SCIENCE. This week's nonsense dives into Alu elements. It'll get you ready for a genetics test -- and spring training. Play science!) I'm being driven into the arms of a monster. And not a fun monster, either. Like Grover or Mojo Jojo or Kang. (In fairness, I never found Kang all that appealing.) No, in this case I'm being driven -- thrust, really -- into the hairy, wartified arms of one of modern society's most hideous and notorious monsters: Comcast For the entire lifespan of this site -- nearly twelve years now; and boy, it doesn't seem like a day more…
  • Perfectly Rational Fridge-a-phobia

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:06 pm
    (This week's Secondhand SCIENCE saga is all about radioisotopes. It sounds like some itchy disease you'd get from listening to NPR. But no. It's another thing entirely. Go see.) I've never been drugged in my sleep, kidnapped and whisked off to another location that's a near-exact replica of my home. Well. Not so far as I know, anyway. Though I have wondered who keeps getting crumbs all over my couch, which I usually notice soon after I've eaten dinner on it. I'll keep an eye on that. In the meantime, I assume my kidnap-slash-disorient scenario hasn't ever happened. To me. Probably. But I did…
  • Soon, I'll Say the Darnedest Things

    28 Feb 2015 | 11:35 am
    (Hope over to Secondhand SCIENCE for this week's nonsense, and learn about the zinc finger. I promise it's the least frightening finger I'll ever describe to you. Unless you have a phobia about metal-binding proteins. Or frogs. Or formalwear made from garbage. Then you're on your own.) I can be socially awkward. This should come as no surprise to anyone who's ever been within thirty-five feet of me in public. It can be a burden, and embarrassing -- but I've finally figured out my problem. And better, how to solve it. You see, I've discovered my particular brand of awkwardness doesn't stem…
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  • Bungled Bathrooms Of The Day

    Cary McNeal
    27 Mar 2015 | 8:30 am
    Bathroom designs gone wrong, courtesy of Daisy. Hang 'em high! They have an open door policy. The Cone Head. Your throne awaits! For Siamese Twins? PEEping Tom! For the long arm of the stall   Make sure you put the seat down!   Fixed it! Hope you can ride sidesaddle.
  • News: Broken Traffic Signal Flips Off Pedestrians

    Cary McNeal
    27 Mar 2015 | 7:56 am
    You go, signal! I hate jaywalkers too. Broken Traffic Signal Flips Off Pedestrians The city of Fort Collins on Thursday has fixed a traffic signal that gives pedestrians an obscene hand gesture instead of an order to stop. It is unclear for how long the signal, at the corner of Johnson Drive near Creekside Park, had been malfunctioning. But traffic engineer Joe Olson said as soon as the city
  • Epic Burns On Social Media Of The Day

    Cary McNeal
    25 Mar 2015 | 8:38 am
    Ouch x 26.
  • Photo Of The Day: Inconceivable

    Cary McNeal
    25 Mar 2015 | 6:55 am
    A dead ringer.
  • Funny Tweets Of The Day

    Cary McNeal
    23 Mar 2015 | 7:18 am
    I really need to do more with my Twitter page.
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    YouTube: Comedy

  • Five Nights at Freddy's Reaction Compilation

    8 Mar 2015 | 10:00 am
    Five Nights at Freddy's Reaction Compilation The Funniest Moments from ALL of Five Nights at Freddy's! FNAF 1 ▻ FNAF 2 ... From: Markiplier Views: 6203564 146118 ratings Time: 06:47 More in Gaming
  • Will Smith & Jimmy Fallon Beatbox "It Takes Two" Using iPad App

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    5 Feb 2015 | 9:13 pm
    Will Smith & Jimmy Fallon Beatbox "It Takes Two" Using iPad App Jimmy and Will Smith make a beatbox loop using an iPad app to sing "It Takes Two" by Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock. Watch the trailer for Will's latest film, Focus, here: From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 10386317 92284 ratings Time: 04:07 More in Comedy
  • Jimmy Fallon Went to Bayside High with "Saved By The Bell" Cast

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    4 Feb 2015 | 8:54 pm
    Jimmy Fallon Went to Bayside High with "Saved By The Bell" Cast While in L.A., Jimmy reminisces about his time at Bayside High with the gang from "Saved By The Bell." Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Watch... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 29911511 144529 ratings Time: 08:12 More in Comedy
  • Lip Sync Battle with Will Ferrell, Kevin Hart and Jimmy Fallon

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    1 Feb 2015 | 11:44 pm
    Lip Sync Battle with Will Ferrell, Kevin Hart and Jimmy Fallon Jimmy asks guests Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart to battle in an intense lip sync-off to songs like Beyoncé's "Drunk in Love" and John Legend's "All of Me." Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 34980481 247174 ratings Time: 13:22 More in Comedy
  • Jimmy Fallon Blew a Chance to Date Nicole Kidman

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    6 Jan 2015 | 8:55 pm
    Jimmy Fallon Blew a Chance to Date Nicole Kidman Jimmy Fallon and Nicole Kidman have two very different embarrassing memories of the afternoon they first met. Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 27775832 153336 ratings Time: 09:15 More in Comedy
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    English Russia

  • Road Safety Posters From the Soviet Past

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:53 pm
    Here is a cool collection of vintage posters appealing to Soviet people for caution on the roads. Today we have much more dense traffic but for some reason safety posters are not popular anymore. "You are on the highway, not … Read more...
  • Russian Army Presented a Fashion Collection

    26 Mar 2015 | 7:17 pm
    Looks like Russian Army has presented its first fashion collection for the consumers and one of the top Russian army bloggers I. Korotchenko has paid a visit to the show, so now we all can see what is in store … Read more...
  • Funny Comics by Soviet Air Force Technician About His Life and Work

    26 Mar 2015 | 7:04 pm
    Valerie Medvedev was a Soviet air force technician servicing air force planes and jets. He finished pilot's college in Russia but instead of being a real pilot he had to work on the ground for over eight years. Later he … Read more...
  • Faces of Russian Women and Men in Color from World War 2

    26 Mar 2015 | 6:33 pm
    An awesome collection of color (or colorized) photos devoted to the faces of people participating in World War 2 from Russian side - soldiers, commanders, nurses, snipers, sailors, pilots - you name it. Pretty much standing out in such vivid … Read more...
  • Russia vs India in Pictures

    26 Mar 2015 | 12:24 pm
    A Russian photographer has travelled both thru Russia and thru India and now states that both countries have many in common. To prove his point he published a set of photos. Each picture consists of two photos - first made … Read more...
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    Strange Herring

  • A Strange Preview: Spectre

    Anthony Sacramone
    27 Mar 2015 | 6:39 pm
    “You’re a kite dancing in a hurricane, Mr. Bond.” “Yeah well, you’re … you’re a big fat metaphor generator. And I’m not taking that back.” Those snappy comebacks just aren’t what they were during the Connery years… That was the tease. This is the official trailer. And the villain this time is Oberhauser, who I believe morphs into the iconic Bond villain Blofeld—and played by the inimitable Christoph Waltz! And the Bond Girl is Monica Bellucci!   It’s amazing the excitement this character and franchise can still…
  • A Strange Preview: Southpaw

    Anthony Sacramone
    27 Mar 2015 | 4:43 pm
    From Antoine Fuqua, the director of Training Day, and Kurt Sutter, the creator of Sons of Anarchy, I give you a descent into hell.   Gyllenhaal apparently added 15 pounds of muscle to his normal weight after dropping 30 pounds for his role as the emaciated crime journalist Lou Bloom in Nightcrawler, which I didn’t see so please stop saying I did. Southpaw looks like one of those films you spend curled up in a ball, chewing on your knuckles, like Cinderella. BTW: Any of you fans of Sons of Anarchy? I tried watching it very late in its run, and caught the last few eps, but…
  • “You Want It. I Think I Had to Have It.”

    Anthony Sacramone
    25 Mar 2015 | 6:10 pm
    Charlie Rose interviews the great Al Pacino. The stuff on The Godfather alone is worth your time. The character of Michael Corleone is one of American film’s most compelling and inimitable. He begins as this college-boy war hero, with the pretty WASP girlfriend, sitting off in one corner of the garden wedding scene, a wall of separation between him and the rest of the Corleone clan (“That’s my family, Kay. It’s not me”) and ends up sitting in his late father’s seat of power — and the transformation is utterly credible. And yet, as Pacino says in the…
  • “A Good Man Is Hard to Find”

    Anthony Sacramone
    25 Mar 2015 | 7:29 am
    As read by its author, Flannery O’Connor, in 1959 before a live audience of enthusiastic fans.   Via the Paris ReviewFiled under: A Strange Reading
  • Framing Images

    Anthony Sacramone
    22 Mar 2015 | 7:35 pm
      I found the first and final frames* of Kill Bill startling, and who could forget the haunting images from The Searchers.  Click here for a list of all the films explored in the video. I would love to know whether the filmmakers had the movies framed in just this way from the very beginning, in their head, perhaps, with the final image alluding to, commenting on, the opening. I would love to see juxtaposed the first and final frames of, say, Touch of Evil, Lawrence of Arabia, and Clockwork Orange—or anything from Ingmar Bergman. Patton begins with his walking onto that…
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  • The New Guy

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:18 am
    “That time my mother thought it would be a great idea to take us to Madam Tussaud’s to meet her new eight foot slash lookalike boyfriend for the first time.” (submitted by Roxzann in the UK) “That time my mother thought it would be a great idea to take us to Madam Tussaud’s to meet her new eight foot slash lookalike boyfriend for the first time.” (submitted by Roxzann in the UK) The post The New Guy appeared first on
  • The Wonder Years

    28 Mar 2015 | 11:47 pm
    “During the ages of 8 to 11 years old (1972 to 1975) I became trapped in a vortex of awkwardness. And my mom’s taste in clothing really brought it to another level – this stuff was embarrassing even back then. I honestly don’t know how to chose which pictures to send because it seems each one was worse than the last. But here are the two best , age 8 from 1972 and age 10 from 1974.” (submitted by Brad) “During the ages of 8 to 11 years old (1972 to 1975) I became trapped in a vortex of awkwardness. And my mom’s taste in clothing really brought it to…
  • Don’t You Forget About Me

    28 Mar 2015 | 11:08 pm
    “We have three daughters, and were getting pictures with each. Chloe was not happy that she was being left out of the photo!” (submitted by Derek) “We have three daughters, and were getting pictures with each. Chloe was not happy that she was being left out of the photo!” (submitted by Derek) The post Don’t You Forget About Me appeared first on
  • P.I.M.P

    27 Mar 2015 | 10:20 pm
    Meet Frishse Pitter, a German pimp from the 70′s. (via Peter) Meet Frishse Pitter, a German pimp from the 70′s. (via Peter) The post P.I.M.P appeared first on
  • 17 Kids Who Picked the Wrong Shirt

    Charlie Mattingly
    27 Mar 2015 | 9:45 pm
    The post 17 Kids Who Picked the Wrong Shirt appeared first on
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  • Anonymous says FML

    29 Mar 2015 | 8:17 am
    Today, my 8-year-old son told me to grow a pair and man up. FML
  • shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa says FML

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:03 am
    Today, I had to teach my grandma how to burn files to CDs. I jokingly said that it doesn't involve literally burning the disks in fire, to which she responded by slapping me and calling me a patronizing brat. FML
  • Anonymous says FML

    29 Mar 2015 | 6:33 am
    Today, I found out the fund-raiser my uncle ran to raise money for his cancer treatment was all a sham, that he doesn't even have cancer, and that the money was to fund a coke habit nobody knew he even had. FML
  • M.SHUKRI says FML

    29 Mar 2015 | 5:54 am
    Today, I was sitting in my bedroom relaxing when I heard my little sister and my brother. Thinking it was cute they were talking again, I was listening. They were not just "talking", they were making plans on how to kill me. FML
  • ToiletRoll says FML

    29 Mar 2015 | 5:49 am
    Today, I was in a public restroom taking a poop and as I started unrolling the toilet paper, the whole roll fell off the handle and rolled out underneath the cubicle door. I heard somebody laugh at me. Nobody helped. FML
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    Lowering the Bar

  • Sufficiently Notorious Convicted Felon Identified?

    27 Mar 2015 | 12:28 pm
    My previous post on this mystery is already pretty long, so I'm doing this update separately. To start with, here's the evidence to the extent I can glean it from the redacted OIG report, which, if you've forgotten, reported that a convicted terrorist had not only been allowed to fly, but was given TSA Pre-Check status. The report says outright that the "sufficiently notorious convicted felon": Is a former member of a "domestic terrorist group"; Was involved in "numerous felonious criminal activities"; Was convicted of murder and "offenses that involve explosives"; Served a "multiple-year…
  • Texas Bill Would Make It Illegal for You to Film a Cop Beating You

    26 Mar 2015 | 4:22 pm
    Section 38.15 of the Texas Penal Code makes it an offense to interrupt, disrupt, impede, or otherwise interfere with "public duties," including those being exercised by a police officer. That's the law pretty much everywhere, of course, but the question that has arisen in recent years is whether you are "interfering" (etc.) with a police officer just because you are recording what he or she is doing. Actually, that's not a serious question, it's just something bad cops say because they don't want to be recorded. The argument boils down to, "I had to stop what I was doing and come over…
  • The Most Interesting Carpool-Lane Ruse in the World

    26 Mar 2015 | 1:15 pm
    Interesting, but not successful: In this case the "extra passenger" is—in the unlikely event you don't recognize him—a cardboard cutout of The Most Interesting Man in the World, the spokesman for Dos Equis Beer. The driver was busted in the HOV lane of I-5 near Tacoma, and while the trooper did give him a ticket he did not confiscate the Man, according to the report. Just because I looked it up, the Man is portrayed by Jonathan Goldsmith, a 76-year-old actor who has appeared in movies and on TV hundreds of times (not even counting Dos Equis commercials). His career goes back to the…
  • Minor Wordfoolery, Way Updated

    25 Mar 2015 | 10:30 am
    I was pleased to see that far more respectable personage Prof. Eugene Volokh also noticed and commented yesterday on Justice Kagan's use of "way" as an adverb in the Omnicare case. (I mentioned it at the end of this post.) It was the first use of the phrase "way overstates" in any published U.S. opinion, but not (as I speculated) the first use of "way" as an adverb by a Supreme Court justice. That's because, as reader Steve Kass pointed out to me, Justice Kagan herself used it that way at least three times in 2013, all in the same sentence: Amex has put Italian Colors to this…
  • Court: Obligation to Make Sense May Not Be Delegated to Client

    24 Mar 2015 | 4:45 pm
    Here's a more interesting decision by the Supreme Court, although maybe "decision" is the wrong word. The question is: if your client insists on filing something that is complete gibberish, do you have to agree, or do you  have an ethical duty to withdraw from the case? Last October, the very respectable firm of Foley & Lardner filed a petition for certiorari in a patent case entitled Sigram Schindler Beteiligungsgesellschaft MBH, and that title is the most understandable thing about it. Here's the petition, courtesy of Josh Blackman, but just take a gander at this excerpt, if…
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  • Give Him A Hand

    26 Mar 2015 | 2:29 pm
    Gerry was a magician, and he was very good at his craft until one day a freakish accident occurred. It happened during the "Sawing The Lady In Half" trick. He didn't saw her in half. He didn't see her at all because he accidentally sawed off both his hands.Gerry spent weeks in the hospital recovering and then learning how to manage without his hands. His physiotherapist was a beautiful young woman named Jill. And it was love at first sight despite Gerry's handicap - no pun intended.While Gerry was a magician he was an expert at sleight of hand. No one ever knew how he accomplished his tricks…
  • A Little Tale For Awl About Jeb The Woodworker

    18 Mar 2015 | 12:27 pm
    You might say Jeb was a bit of a nerd. At 21 he'd never had a relationship with a member of the fairer sex. Or any sex for that matter. High school was a disaster when it came to relationships. When all the others went off to Saturday night dances Jeb stayed home, locked up in his room playing with his woodworking set. He had saws, hammers, chisels, every kind of woodworking tool imaginable.Jeb's parents thought their son a little strange but he kept out of trouble so they said little about it. When he entered college, Jeb joined the Whittler's Workshop, an after school non-credit woodworking…
  • A Different Little Story About Jack and Diane

    11 Mar 2015 | 3:05 pm
    Jack lived a simple life. Up at 5 o'clock to feed the chickens, milk the cows, unpack the alpacas and jump on the tractor and head for the fields. Jack lived the single life tending his farm. In his mid-thirties he was a ruggedly handsome fellow but having left school in grade 7 to work on the family farm, the rural farm he tended now, he didn't have a lot of time for dating.That was about to change.One quiet evening, with the dishes done and the television dialled to a rerun of Sex In The City, the phone rang. It was his buddy Bud - no shit - on the other end of the line, telling him he'd be…
  • Just Let Me Babble A Moment

    5 Mar 2015 | 2:46 pm
    Okay, I think I've been living under a rock. Or I've spent too much time on the internet or reading books or watching "On Demand" TV series. Or all of those things. Am I babbling?The other night my wife and I were killing an hour between two favourite shows on TV. We flipped over to the Food Network and watched that great old stand-by "Chopped". But this is the Canadian version hosted by Tori Spelling's husband Dean McDermott. Anyway, I think it was the entree round and when the chefs stuck their hands into their mystery boxes  - yes I know how that sounds - they came up with broccolini.
  • Bibliofile

    1 Mar 2015 | 8:15 am
    Lest you think I can't spell I thought I'd remind folks that the title I use for this post each month is my way of updating you on the file of books I've been reading. It's just my way with words, or non words, if you will. I mean, of korse I cahn spell.Of course, the title might have come from the picture in this post. Then, though, it would have been Biliopile. But I digress.Anyhoo, I started off the month with a lengthy look at rock promotor Bill Graham. As a music lover I found this book fascinating, full of anecdotes of his relations with the major rock acts of the day. As the owner of…
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    Ann's Rants

  • Author Advice: Save your Elle Magazines for 30 years for when you end up in Elle

    Ann Imig
    26 Mar 2015 | 7:24 am
    Now that I’m almost an author, I have some pretty sage advice to pass along. All that nostalgia you’ve been hoarding in your brain and in boxes over the years? Time to drag it out and parade it across the internet! Exhibit A: Save your 1980s-era Elle Magazines from when you were a PRETTY WITTY mustachioed Freshman in High School quietly terrorized by her OH BOY BEAUTY percentage of “male hormones,” and likely still reeling from THE SHOCK OF SHEER white swimming suit that allowed your camp friends to see your butt over the summer. That sweet girl couldn’t imagine…
  • Keija Parssinen’s “The Unraveling of Mercy Louis” release day GIVEAWAY!

    Ann Imig
    10 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    Keija Parssinen is an incredible writer and storyteller. Her debut novel, The Ruins of Us, was simultaneously beautiful and shattering. Her second book, The Unraveling of Mercy Louis  releases today and possesses a similar quality, but with even more mystery and an even sharper edge. Mercy Louis is one part Arthur Miller’s The Crucible, one part Rainbow Rowell’s Eleanor and Park, and a little Louise Erdrich’s The Round House too, in terms of rich settings, riveting plot, and family dynamics. Parssinen transports you to teenaged life in small town Texas, and presents the…
  • Unhelping by Zachary Zugg Imig

    Ann Imig
    4 Mar 2015 | 11:30 am
    …Zachary Zugg took out the rug, Jennifer Joy helped shake it. And Jennifer Joy She made a toy, And Zachary Zugg helped break it. from “Helping” by Shel Silverstein I’m a dedicated unhelper. I unhelp–for free–in my kids’ school, and with the local Jewish community. I sign up, and I show up, with smiling eyes, ready hands, and ample enthusiasm. With that smile and enthusiasm comes a super-sized social tendency, and a venti distractedness with room for spaciness. My volunteerism shows heart, if not as reliably…head. Every Friday I administer spelling tests…
  • It’s Awards Season! For Parenting!!

    Ann Imig
    18 Feb 2015 | 3:00 am
    And the winners are… Best Tooth Fairy goes to the parent who actually caries cash. Best Supporting Tooth Fairy goes to the parent who remembers to run to the ATM at 10:30 pm, or writes the most convincing IOU with his or her non-dominant “fairy” hand. Best Timer goes to the parent who has his or her children trained to time their own screens. Best Supporting Timer goes to the parent who remembers to set the timer at all. Best Nail Clipper goes to the parent with kids who trim their own nails. Best Supporting Nail Clipper goes to the parent of kids with the least amount of…
  • Real Valentines for Exhausted Parent Partners*

    Ann Imig
    9 Feb 2015 | 8:07 am
    You’re so freaking hot, I made the coffee, Super Model. I won’t press snooze 875 times when you don’t have to get up, Valentine. I’ll put the kids to bed, Cupid. You just lie there like you do every night, but tonight I’ll heat your neck-warmer thing in the microwave and cool your eye mask and even turn off ¾ of the white noises to make it sound 3/4 less like an airport hangar in here. The bigger the holes in your t-shirt armpits–the more it shrinks to resemble a midriff–the more I want to steal you away and the less I want to steal it for the rag…
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  • Malignant? Moronic? Mediocre?

    29 Mar 2015 | 10:00 am
    Graph by: Ninja_Beefcake Tagged: Bar Graph , mtv , Music , television Share on Facebook
  • Is This Even a Question?

    29 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cheese , delicious , flow chart , food , redundant , think again , toppings Share on Facebook
  • Ignorance Is Bliss

    29 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    Graph by: (via I Love Charts) Tagged: confidence , Line Graph , ignorance is bliss , knowledge Share on Facebook
  • Likelihood of Being Splashed

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
    Graph by: ProfessorOak Tagged: Bar Graph , pool , pooping , shamu , splash , toliet Share on Facebook
  • Poor Man's Timer

    29 Mar 2015 | 6:00 am
    Graph by: Åsum Tagged: alarm , cooking , fire , Pie Chart , smoke , timer Share on Facebook
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    Unique Scoop

  • Weird Things That We Really Should Have a Conversation about Immediately (23 pics )

    29 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    How come Arizona Green Tea can be drunk hot.This guy, and his project.The fact that Sean Bean was born “Shawn”.Justin Bieber, modelling a Walkman, in an office, as a woman, in the ’90s.The potato on the muffin plate.Kendall and Kylie Jenner’s MySpace profiles.This comparison.This photo.This drink, in bottle, with a can top.This goddamn thought.This frog riding a beetle.This powerful cosplay.Whether this is even a real restaurant.Exactly how dirty the White House mirror is.This question.The story behind this sign.Why this hotel thought this was necessary.This question.This woman having…
  • 10 Photos Of Sheep Blanketing The Earth Like Snow

    28 Mar 2015 | 8:02 am
    When you want to photograph clouds but there aren’t any in sight, we suggest trying to find your nearest herd of sheep. Flocks of these cute, fluffy and useful creatures can add an interesting element to landscape photos, but they’re also pretty enough on their own.Sheep have earned a reputation as dumb and foolish animals because of their flocking instinct, but they are actually quite intelligent, performing as well or even better than monkeys and rodents in certain mental tasks. They exhibit facial recognition, long-term memory, a knack for quick learning, and some have even exhibited…
  • Proof That Bill Murray Is The Most Interesting Man In The World (31 pics)

    27 Mar 2015 | 9:02 am
    No other celebrity would do the awesome things that Bill Murray does.
  • 20 Great Zingers And Comebacks From The Mouths Of Historical Figures (20 pics)

    26 Mar 2015 | 8:23 am
    These people all went down in history for doing incredible things but they could have gone down in history simply based on how awesome these zingers are.
  • Dan Bilzerian Shares His Awesome Luxury Life on Instagram (23pics)

    26 Mar 2015 | 8:05 am
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    The Good, Clean Funnies List

  • Big God
    30 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    One day on the way home from church a little girl turned to her mother and said, "Mommy, the preacher's sermon this morning confused me." The mother said, "Oh! Why is that? The girl replied, "Well, he said that God is bigger than we are. Is that true?" "Yes, that's true," the mother replied. "He also said that God lives within us. Is that true too?" Again the mother replied, "Yes." "Well," said the girl. "If God is bigger than us and he lives in us, wouldn't He show through?" Received from Mikey's Funnies.
  • Water in the Glass
    27 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    A well-known proverb states that an optimistic would say a glass is half full, while a pessimist would say it is half empty. What would people of different professions and walks of life say? The BANKER would say that the glass has just under 50% of its net worth in liquid assets. The GOVERNMENT would say that the glass is fuller than if the opposition party were in power. The OPPOSITION would say that it is irrelevant because the present administration has changed the way such volume statistics are collected. The ECONOMIST would say that, in real terms, the glass is 25% fuller than at the…
  • Lullabye
    26 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    A doting father used to sing his little children to sleep until he overheard the four-year-old tell the three-year-old, "If you pretend you're asleep, he stops." Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
  • Will to Marry
    24 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    A millionaire informed his attorney, "I want a stipulation in my will that my wife is to inherit everything, but ONLY if she remarries within six months of my death." "Why such an odd stipulation?" asked the attorney. "Because," he said, "I just want to make sure that at least one person is sorry I died." Received from Pastor Tim.
  • The Religious Horse
    23 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    A courier was travelling across country on a horse. He was in a hurry and rode the horse too hard, so it foundered. Needing to continue on his journey, he went up to a nearby farm and asked the farmer if he could buy a horse. "The only horse I have is this one," the farmer said. "Fine, I'll take it," the courier replied and jumped on the horse's back. The rather religious farmer told the courier how to control the horse. "Say 'Praise the Lord' to get the horse to go and 'Amen' to get it to stop." So with a quick "Praise the Lord," the courier was on his way. He made good time, and his mind…
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    The Velvet Blog

  • get it together twitter

    3 Mar 2015 | 1:22 pm
    it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— Eric J. Rinaldi (@Eric_Rinaldi7) December 16, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— Relatable Quotes (@RelatableQuote) October 21, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— what (@chanelpuke) October 23, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— no (@tbhjuststop) October 23, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— anti joke apple…
  • This blog post does not exist

    5 Oct 2014 | 1:24 pm
    So, those two pieces I wrote for issues 17 and 18 of the Cashiers du Cinemart zine have been posted online. My piece on the terrible movie After Last Season is here, and my article on how Michael Powell adapted the novel They're a Weird Mob is here. And you imagined this blog post. Spooky, huh?
  • Or, "cream plectrums" could be an unfortunate medical condition

    14 May 2014 | 3:35 pm
    Some random person followed me on Twitter this afternoon. She has 12,000 followers, but when you look at their names, you can tell they're mostly bots, with names formed in a game of Twitter Mad Libs. But, oddly, most sound like they could be band names for specific niches. Below, a partial list, followed by suggested genre: criticize_lymph: Shoegaze.vacuum_afterglo: New age.ideal_corpuscl: Heavy metal cover band from Eastern Europe.Indian_bamboozl: Fake world music.liver_looter: Bar band.reject_blouse: Riot grrrrl.conclusion_clam: High school garage band.breath_garbolog: EDM.baby_coincident:…
  • Close the door lightly when you go

    3 Apr 2014 | 2:16 pm
    I hereby propose a moratorium on use of "slams" in headlines. Also, synonyms for "slams." But, really, mostly "slams." All of these headlines were posted to Google News within a time frame of a few hours (I swear): Jennette McCurdy slams Nickelodeon, but network says 'Sam & Cat' Season 2 is a goAnthony Bourdain slams Nigella Lawson's U.S. travel banCris Carter slams Eagles with hypocritical tweet in support of DeSean JacksonEx-auditor-general Fraser slams elections bill as attack on democracyFranken slams Supreme Court decision on campaign contribution Nancy Pelosi Slams Supreme Court's…
  • Hello? Is this thing on?

    25 Mar 2014 | 6:23 am
    Sorry I didn't officially say "This blog is dead." But this blog is dead. You can look for me on Twitter or Facebook. But now that I have your attention: I have a piece on Michael Powell's little-seen (in the U.S., anyway) They're a Weird Mob in the new issue of Cashiers du Cinemart. As far as I know, the film never been released here, but it is on YouTube (part one here and part two here). Powell is my favorite director, and when I was asked to submit something to CdC #18, I knew wanted to write about him. But when I looked around, I found pretty much all of my favorites (including A Matter…
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    Joe Donatelli

  • Fun Things to do in LA

    Joe Donatelli
    22 Mar 2015 | 5:43 pm
    Kings lose, but the sun is out, so everyone wins #losangeles #hotelfigueroa #pool A photo posted by Joe Donatelli (@joedonatelli) on Mar 21, 2015 at 4:12pm PDT When friends or family visit Los Angeles, they often ask what they should do while they’re here. This is my list. Music Go see 1980s cover band Van(...)
  • Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids

    Joe Donatelli
    27 Dec 2014 | 8:17 am
    Bryan Caplan’s Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids: Why Being a Great Parent is Less Work and More Fun Than You Think is a joyful and welcome antidote to the common, tired and debunked claim that having more children somehow makes the world a worse place. Caplan, an economist at George Mason University and prolific blogger,(...)
  • The Best Books I Read in 2014

    Joe Donatelli
    7 Dec 2014 | 8:52 am
    Check out a list of journalist Joe Donatelli's favorite books that he read in 2014.
  • A Few Words about ‘The Black Swan: The Impact of the Highly Improbable’

    Joe Donatelli
    6 Dec 2014 | 3:28 pm
    I enjoyed reading The Black Swan by Nassim Nicholas Taleb.
  • Zero to One: Notes on Startups, or How to Build for the Future: Review

    Joe Donatelli
    1 Nov 2014 | 5:33 pm
    Book review of Peter Thiel's Zero to One
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    Futility Closet

  • Podcast Episode 51: Poet Doppelgängers

    Greg Ross
    29 Mar 2015 | 4:52 pm
    In this week’s episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll look at the strange phenomenon of poet doppelgängers — at least five notable poets have been seen by witnesses when their physical bodies were elsewhere. We’ll also share our readers’ research on Cervino, the Matterhorn-climbing pussycat, and puzzle over why a man traveling internationally would not be asked for his passport. Sources for our feature on poet doppelgängers: John Oxenford, trans., The Autobiography of Wolfgang von Goethe, 1969. G. Wilson Knight, Byron and Shakespeare, 2002. Julian…
  • The Paradox of Goals

    Greg Ross
    28 Mar 2015 | 11:04 pm
    Image: Wikimedia Commons Suppose that two teams of equal ability are playing football. If goals are scored at regular intervals, it seems natural to expect that each team will be in the lead for half the playing time. Surprisingly, this isn’t so: If a total of n = 20 goals are scored, then the probability that Team A leads after the first 10 goals and Team B leads after the second 10 goals is only 6 percent, while the probability that one team leads throughout the entire game is about 35 percent. (When the scores are equal, the leading team is considered to be the one that was leading…
  • New Tropes for Old

    Greg Ross
    27 Mar 2015 | 11:40 pm
    Image: Wikimedia Commons In an 1810 satire, C.L. Pitt noted that “a novel may be made out of a romance, or a romance out of a novel with the greatest ease, by scratching out a few terms, and inserting others.” The steps below will, “like machinery in factories,” convert a Gothic romance into a sentimental novel: Where you find: Put: A castle An house A cavern A bower A groan A sigh A giant A father A bloodstained dagger A fan Howling blasts Zephyrs A knight A gentleman without whiskers A lady who is the heroine Need not be changed, being versatile Assassins Telling…
  • Chin Up

    Greg Ross
    27 Mar 2015 | 11:16 am
    “I adore war. It is like a big picnic without the objectlessness of a picnic. I’ve never been so well or so happy. No one grumbles at one for being dirty.” So wrote professional soldier and poet Julian Grenfell in October 1914, shortly after arriving at the western front. The unparalleled horrors of the First World War seemed to call forth untapped reserves of mannerly British sang-froid, a “stoical reticence” that artillery officer P.H. Pilditch traced to training in the public schools: “Everything is toned down. … Nothing is ‘horrible.’…
  • The Long Way

    Greg Ross
    26 Mar 2015 | 11:11 pm
    It’s possible to sail in a straight line from Pakistan to Siberia — a carefully plotted great-circle route will thread a line between Madascar and the African mainland, between Tierra del Fuego and Antarctica, and through the Aleutian Islands to arrive at the Kamchatka Peninsula, a total distance of nearly 20,000 miles, about 80 percent of the Earth’s circumference. You can reverse course to get back to Karachi. (Thanks, Derek.) The post The Long Way appeared first on Futility Closet.
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    Fib News - Various business entities for your business

  • Cost-Effective Tips To Save On Carpet Cleaning

    26 Mar 2015 | 1:44 am
    The cost of carpet cleaning services these days can be expensive because it may depend on the size of the carpet and its material. Nonetheless, you can always find a carpet cleaning company that can offer you quality services at an affordable rate. For instance, there is such a great service at Carpet cleaning Southampton. They offer top quality carpet cleaning services at affordable cost. They don’t just offer washing but also steaming and drying. You can get everything you need at their company when it comes to carpet cleaning. If you want to save time, arrange a service so they can send…
  • The Internet is a Convenient Store Indeed

    25 Mar 2015 | 2:33 am
    If you’re planning to purchase some of the finest products on the web, then make sure that you try and consider it because it’s the best way for you to get the right product for you to use. There are lots of products that are available over the internet, and expect that you will be able to get the right things that you will really love. Rest assured that the internet is a great and convenient store because you will be able to see a lot of things in it, and all you need to do is to click and read. The internet is the best because you will be able to see information about the product such…
  • Watch Complete Episodes Of Your Favorite Anime Series Online

    25 Mar 2015 | 2:15 am
    If you are addicted to anime television series and get hooked at Aldnoah Zero Season 1, then you would definitely like to watch Aldnoah Zero Season 2, too. At this season, you will literally pick up where the season one left off. It is a continuation of Inaho’s struggle along with other main characters in the story. Apparently, the characters that were supposed to be dead in the end of the season 1 are still alive. In this season, Count Saazbaum is seeking revenge. It is great to know that the Earth’s Terrans won over the Martians during their battle. However, it was just only after a few…
  • A Fun and Strategic Game, Clash of Clans

    24 Mar 2015 | 3:34 am
    The clash of clans hack 2014 is an epic combat strategy game that is released in 2012 for iOS platforms. And in 2013 it was released for Android in Canada and Finland. It is also released in Google Play internationally. Many people are playing this game and they said it is phenomenal. It is an online multi-player game wherein you can have a team of players all over the world. You can build your village and have war against millions of people all around the globe online. You ca also train troops. The troops are classified into Tier 1 which consists of Goblins, Archers, and Barbarians. The Tier…
  • The Functionality of QR Code

    23 Mar 2015 | 4:07 am
    Products and services must be advertised well. This is for the productivity of the business. There are ways on how to advertise the products. One of these ways is the placing of QR code in the product you are promoting. QR codes are bar codes that are incorporated with information about the product or the service. The code has a black-and-white square that consists of three smaller alignment squares which are located in the corners of the large squares. It also has a random-looking pattern of dots that have the information for the particular code. This code is designed for devices that have…
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    Best Clean Funny Jokes

  • Things Found Only in America

    16 Mar 2015 | 6:41 pm
    Only in America……can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in America……are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. Only in America……do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America……do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke. Only in America……do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters. Only in America……do…
  • Obama, St. Peter and the Devil

    16 Mar 2015 | 4:43 pm
    While walking down Pennsylvania Avenue one fine afternoon on his way back to the White House to sign executive orders banning certain types of ammunition and edible school lunches, President Barack Obama is tragically hit by a Prius and dies. “Welcome to Heaven, Mr. Obama,” St. Peter says. “Before you settle in, it seems there’s a problem. We seldom see an American head of state around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.” “No problem, just let me in,” Obama tells St. Peter. “If only it were that easy, Mr. Obama,” St. Peter clucks.  “I’d like…
  • Two tough questions

    15 Mar 2015 | 2:12 am
    Two Tough Questions – think carefully before you answer! Question 1: If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion? Read the next question before looking at the response for this one. Question 2: It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates. Candidate A. Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with an astrologist. He’s had two mistresses. He also chain smokes…
  • Would You Work For This Company?

    14 Mar 2015 | 2:01 am
    Do you fancy working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics?: 29 have been accused of spousal abuse 7 have been arrested for fraud 19 have been accused of writing bad checks 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses 3 have done time for assault 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges 8 have been arrested for shoplifting 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year … Can you guess which organization this is? Given…
  • Politician decides between Heaven and Hell

    13 Mar 2015 | 1:58 am
    Politician decides between Heaven and Hell – While walking down the street one day, a corrupt politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. “Welcome to Heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a politician around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.” “No problem, just let me in.” says the politician. “Well, I’d like to but I have orders from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend…
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    Renée Finberg ' TELLS ALL ' in her blog of her Adventures in Design

  • GENIUS FLOR - Flooring Tiles

    24 Mar 2015 | 12:33 pm
    Since I am living in a Maine cottage....there is mud, and salt etc in the winter months.There is not much pavement here.Need I say more.It is a 3rd world!!!!Trust me on this-it is in every way.No shopping, The contractors / handy men are working with an IQ of 72 ....if that.SoYOU BETTER KNOW HOW TO DO IT YOURSELF.Now where I work they sell carpet tiles.But these are GLUE down.This is not for me ,I have a beautiful wood floor.The above example is what i will use in my family room,the TV room off the kitchen.You can design your own floor on their very friendly planner as shown aboveThe…
  • Follow your bliss which does not include Maine .......

    19 Mar 2015 | 8:49 am
    I just came back from Boca Raton ( my old home of 30 yrs.)to THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!I haven't been posting because other than  5 or 6 months a year here in Rockland Maine-it is HORRIBLE.I hate it.It has been pure torture in ALL the remaining months.There is no place better to be for those summer months & fall.....butthe rest of the time....OMG, it's the worst.And I haven't posted because I have prided myself on being honest in all my post.I have had nothing nice to say, so I didn't want to post because I would sound so NEGATIVE.My mother reads my posts,and I didn't want her to…
  • It's Time To Get Married

    25 Sep 2014 | 5:56 am
    And pick up my daughter (Andi) & her sweetheart (Antoine)in Portland Maine and drive them back to Rockland Maine.I haven't seen her in 2 years.We were never apart more than 2 months until my move to Maine.My dear, dear and beautiful Mom!Has been the most loving and supportive....I don't know what I would have ever done without her.The older I get, the smarter she gets!!This is the church we will Marry in -St. John Baptist Episcopal Church.Father Peter Jenks will marry us. He has been great support and encouragement to me since I arrived on the scene.I consider him my friend…
  • Window Boxes & Faux Balconies

    11 Aug 2014 | 3:04 am
    window boxes, faux balconiesI adore window boxes and false balconies!!!Adding window boxes filled with flowers can radically change the facade of a building.Beacon Hill in Bostonwindow boxes, faux balconiesI think the window boxes mounted on the second story adds charm to this already pretty home.There is no limit to what you can use.Just fill with flowering plants and mount to a wall, door , or a window.window boxes, faux balconiesThis really says "NYC SPRING"window boxes, faux balconiesFaux BalconyWhat could do more for a structure than a faux balcony? Faux BalconyI have found a…
  • I Need A Rock

    11 Jun 2014 | 3:55 am
    It is finally beginning to warm up...there are signs of life ....the trees are sprouting tiny chartreuse leaves.The forsythia are just now starting to bloom.The tulips are beyond confusedAnd so am I. Last Thursday I went sailing with a friend and it was beyond divine.Not a cloud in the sky.Sun.Warmth.I really thought that I had died and gone to girl JOEYYes.It was a good day.One of the best that I have had since my move here. The next day I worked in the yard with my motherand it was a typically dismal and chilly.We mulched, raked leaves and planted.The very next day was…
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    Points in Case - Enlightening and Irreverent Comedy

  • How the Zombie Apocalypse Changed the Used Car Game

    Tim Sullivan
    28 Mar 2015 | 8:43 pm
    Article by Tim Sullivan Good morning! I see you're looking at our selection of zombie-proofed vehicles. These certified ZUV's are very popular now and we've got quite a few nice ones in stock.The Bronco caught your eye, huh? I'm not surprised, it's a beauty. It comes with a 6" lift and 36" tires, which means you'll have plenty of clearance for running off-road should we have another outbreak, like up by Scranton. My wife and I took a similar truck up into the hills when things got really bad here. Of course, everyone else did the same thing so those hills were fairly cosmopolitan by…
  • An Honest Spotify Commercial Interlude

    Lucas Hubbard
    25 Mar 2015 | 8:52 pm
    Article by Lucas Hubbard Want a break from the ads? Stop listening.You know how long you've been playing this same goddamn DJ? I know he calls himself an artist, but come on. It's Pitbull. His idea of creativity is ripping a chart-topper from the 80's and adding a drum beat to it. He's a hack.But no, sounds like this is super important to you. You've got things figured out, listening to this Cuban cockroach on shuffle, day after day. I bet you're a lot of fun at work.Want a break from the ads? Well, do ya, punk?Have you heard of iTunes? Worst-case, you're out a buck twenty-nine. Is that too…
  • A Letter from Your Hangover

    Elisa Abatsis
    23 Mar 2015 | 6:55 pm
    Article by Elisa Abatsis Darling,I apologize for my delayed arrival. I was hoping to be there when you woke up. But instead I sauntered in around noon, right after you finished that third cup of coffee. I could see you getting that strange, fervent knot in your stomach as I approached. You weren't expecting me, and for that I'm sorry. I really am. You thought, I'm sure, that there was a slight chance I'd drop by, but you weren't planning for it. No, you were playing it cool, getting in the shower and biding your time, not wanting to look like you were waiting for me. I certainly didn't forget…
  • Drunk Playlist Generator (Just Add Vodka)

    Kerreanna DiMauro
    20 Mar 2015 | 8:03 pm
    Article by Kerreanna DiMauro What's in a name? More specifically, what's in a performer's name? My iPod is one massive mega-playlist filled with hand-picked rock theatrics and badass girl power, creatively categorized ONLY by the singer/band names. That's right, I've configured my playlist according to wordplay generated from wildly-named music artists. Aha! It's true. I do it. How could it be? Hear me out.With my freakish talent for cobbling together artist names, I believe I will become music royalty.I've retooled the notion of mood-centric playlists. The burning secret? I'm a playful DJ.
  • A Magician's Legal Defense

    Luke Pohjala
    18 Mar 2015 | 8:11 pm
    Article by Luke Pohjala The plaintiff can ask all the questions they please, but I must apologize because I may not be able to answer every one of them. You see, I am a magician, and as we all know a magician never reveals his secret. I may be under oath here in this courtroom, but thirty years ago I took a much higher oath at Harry Houdini University, and I have no intentions of breaking that oath for another. Whatever the jury's decision may be, I am going to hold true to my Magician's Oath.I have been asked how the woman ended up dead in a motel bathroom in a room under my name, Tony the…
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    Really Funny Jokes

  • Unparalleled

    Mitesh Asher
    12 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    Tina, whose popularity among the boys was unparalleled, paid a visit to Dr. Paes.Doctor Paes told her she was pregnant. He then added, "I know you are dating several guys. Do you know who the father is?"Tina was quick to retort, "If you gulped up a can of Bush's baked beans, would you figure out which bean is responsible for the gas?"
  • Way to Heaven

    Mitesh Asher
    11 Mar 2015 | 9:45 am
    Father Reynold was having a conversation with a group of kids about how good behavior could help them go to Heaven. When he had finished, he asked them, "Where does everyone here want to go?"Little Tina remarked, "Heaven!"Father Reynold asked, "And what should you be to be able to get there?"Little Harry replied, "Dead!"
  • What a career!

    Mitesh Asher
    10 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    Jeremy retired after 38 years of his career. He made USD 10,000,000 which was a result of hard work, being meticulous, proper planning, integrity, dedication, competence, smart investment. And the death of his maternal aunt who left him USD 9,999,999.
  • A matter of principles

    Mitesh Asher
    9 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    When Robbie returned from school, his grandad asked, "What did they teach you in school today?""I don't know" replied Robbie, "but the teacher kept talking about principles. I didn't understand one word."Grandad said, "That's not difficult to understand. I will tell you what it is. Say, I buy stuff at the supermarket, and the cashier gives me more change by mistake, my predicament would be whether to keep it for myself or follow my principles and give it to Grandma."
  • Dorothy's treatment

    Mitesh Asher
    6 Mar 2015 | 6:19 am
    Dorothy visited a shrink and told him, "Whenever I lie down on the bed, I get this mind-numbing fear that something is below the bed."The shrink said, "I have treated many phobias but this seems to be a unique case. But do not worry, I will help you get rid of it."Dorothy said, "Thank you. How many sessions will it take?"The shrink replied,"Probably 20 to 25. It will cost 75 pounds per session but by the end of it, you would be completely cured."When Dorothy did not turn up for the first session, the shrink called her. "Why didn't you come?", he asked. Dorothy replied, "When I informed the…
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    Very Good Short Funny Jokes | Making Life a Little More Humorous

  • Arts class homework

    Mitesh Asher
    12 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    Art teacher : Show me your homework.Titu : I am sorry but my dog feasted on it.Art teacher : What? Wasn't your homework an abstract art to be made of pins & needles? Titu : It was sir. My dog is in the hospital.
  • Active?

    Mitesh Asher
    11 Mar 2015 | 10:23 am
    The country bum visited the gynac with his daughter.There was a long queue in the clinic. Finally, they were called inside the doctor's cabin.The gynac asked, "Well, what is the problem?"The country bum replied, "Need to put her on birth control."The gynac asked, "Is she active with the boys?"The country bum replied, "Nah! She just lays there same way her mother does."
  • Newly weds argument

    Mitesh Asher
    9 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    They were newly weds. While Tom wanted just one child, Tina wanted two children. There was a heated argument, and Tom decided to put an end to it. He said to Tina, "After we have our first child, I will get myself sterilized."Tina was quick to fire back, "That's all right. I hope you will love the second one like your own."
  • Help with mathematics

    Mitesh Asher
    6 Mar 2015 | 8:48 am
    Mr.Runwal wanted some clarifications in an Invoice that was given to him. He asked his secretary, Lily for help. He said to her, "If I give you 45000 dollars less 12.36% service tax, how much would you take off?"Lily promptly replied, "Everything but my necklace."
  • Unique name

    Mitesh Asher
    4 Feb 2015 | 12:01 am
    Rita bought a racehorse and named him Myface.Her friend Dolly commented, "Isn't that a strange name for a horse? What are you going to do with him?"Rita replied, "He is one of the fastest horses in the circuit. But I have not bought him for his speed. I don't mind if he does not win any races."Dolly was very confused and asked, "Then what have you bought him for?"Rita replied, "I will get utmost satisfaction when I hear those posh snobbish women scream, "Come on, Myface!"
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    The Last King Of Shambhala

  • Episode #26 (Finale Part Two) of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic) ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    26 Mar 2015 | 8:07 pm
    CLICK HERE TO GO BACK TO PART 1 Did you like the Freaky Freaky Fridays series?   You can subscribe by clicking here so you get informed when the Freaky Freaky Fridays team comes back, as well as getting a free comic, and being
  • Episode #26 (Finale Part One) of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic) ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    26 Mar 2015 | 7:38 pm
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. Want to go back to the start? Click here. Want to skip to Part 2? Click here. ---------------------------------------------------------------- This is me - Daniel Hello and welcome to the very last Freaky Freaky Fridays episode of the season. It has been an absolute joy bringing this to you weekly, and I hope you enjoy today's epic ending that the
  • Episode #25 of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic): The Escape ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    20 Mar 2015 | 7:33 am
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. New to this webcomic?  So you're not completely lost, a good place to catch up is... here.If you like that, then check out the Xmas Special... here.And if you like that, you can use this online time machine and go back to the very start... here. Skip to the two-part finale... here. ----------------------------------------------------- This is me -
  • Episode #24 of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic): A Grey Day ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    13 Mar 2015 | 6:51 am
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. New to this webcomic?  So you're not completely lost, a good place to catch up is... here.If you like that, then check out the Xmas Special... here.And if you like that, you can use this online time machine and go back to the very start... here. Skip to the next episode here. ----------------------------------------------------- Question: Why is this
  • Superhero Soap Opera Episode 6: Buying a Kryptonite Engagement Ring

    Daniel Newton
    11 Mar 2015 | 5:25 pm
    Sorry this post is late, life has been quite hectic of late - don't worry, Freaky Freaky Fridays post should still be on schedule.  This week, Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) sets her eyes on a kryptonite engagement ring, and Clark Kent (Superman) has trouble telling her that's a bad idea. These DC Comics fan fiction videos are being used for relationship education purposes. They are not for
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  • The girl from The Ring has gone from scary to sexy

    25 Mar 2015 | 3:15 am
    Do you remember the scary little girl that appeared in the hit horror movie – The Ring? Ever wondered what she looks like now? Then take a look here to find out… Daveigh Elizabeth Chase played the evil girl – Samara Morgan in the 2002 horror movie – The Ring. Her scary role helped her win the 2003 Best Villain award at the MTV Movie Awards. But as you can see from the picture below Daveigh has gone from scary to sexy. Since her appearance in The Ring Daveigh Elizabeth Chase has starred in many films such as Donnie Darko, Beethoven’s 5th and Big Love. She has also appeared in many TV…
  • How to properly break open a Parmesan cheese (video)

    28 Dec 2014 | 1:23 pm
    There is the wrong way and the right way…
  • Adopted Turtle

    25 Dec 2014 | 8:54 am
    Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate. “Dear,” she chirped, “I think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted.”
  • Q-bert 2004 game

    25 Dec 2014 | 5:30 am
    Play this classic arcade game for free… No coins required We like to thank Q-bert for allowing us to use the game
  • Funny wedding photos #1

    9 Nov 2014 | 1:33 am
    Some wedding are really crazy…  
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  • Obesity Is Hurting The Economy

    The Mayor
    27 Mar 2015 | 5:46 am
    Obesity is hurting the what? I can’t hear you, I have a cheeseburger in my ear. Scientists, experts, and other assorted malcontents have published research putting a dollar figure on how much obesity is costing the US economy. Here’s a hint – it’s a lot. Widespread obesity raised medical-care costs by $315.8 billion in 2010, according to John Cawley, an economics professor at Cornell University in Ithaca, New York. That amounted to about $3,508 a year for each obese person, the latest available data showed. The expenses, which include doctors’ appointments, hospital…
  • Chinese Year Of The Goat

    The Mayor
    27 Mar 2015 | 5:03 am
    Whoever said that Chinese women don’t age gracefully obviously hasn’t seen this year’s Chinese Year of the Goat poster girl. If there’s anything hotter than a chick with a horn, no teeth, and hands so large that it would feel like you’re getting a handjob from Corey Perry of the Anaheim Ducks while he wears hockey gloves, well then, The Mayor hasn’t seen it/her. Don’t change a thing horn-woman, keep on being China proud.
  • Victory Coffee

    Fenris Badwulf
    27 Mar 2015 | 2:16 am
    Not too long ago, whores and prostitutes were ‘bad’ in the feminist play book. Now, in keeping with sharia doctrine, all women are whores, and will stoop to prostitution unless wearing a potato sack. So, put your mind to the creation and management of a Love House franchise. You can love there, you can go there for love, or you can be a love manager. You can figure out how to divide up the white guilt.
  • Please Help

    The Mayor
    26 Mar 2015 | 5:17 am
    Any help locating her would be appreciated. Family contacted police after she didn’t show up for a hair appointment. They worry that if she doesn’t get to the hair dresser soon that she’ll start morphing into one of those guys from Duck Dynasty.
  • Victory Coffee

    Fenris Badwulf
    26 Mar 2015 | 2:08 am
    Ah, Paladin press. I have a shelf of their books. And for you that are going to be facing down a never worker N-person who is empowered by the No Arrest, No Crime policy of our career minded police forces, this will prove useful. Hands Up, Don’t Rob Me does not apply to whitey.
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    Noise to Signal

  • One explanation for portrait mode

    29 Mar 2015 | 1:58 pm
    The release of live-video-streaming apps Meerkat and Periscope has led a lot of people to ask why neither of them supports landscape-mode video (think rectangle-lying-down instead of rectangle-standing-up). One of the apps’ developers has said it’s because people are used to holding their smartphones vertically, which I suppose makes sense. I still prefer my theory (Fig. 1, above). By the way, I’ve learned a metric crap-tonne of stuff about web video from the great Steve Garfield. He’s kind of your advance scout in that world, reporting back from ten minutes into the…
  • Pheidippides, meet Fitbippides

    7 Mar 2015 | 10:57 am
    This cartoon goes out to three people: Beth Kanter, the #nptech maven who’s been spurring a bunch of us to get off our butts and start moving, Deborah Hobson, my mother-in-law and my favourite classicist, and Troy Angrignon, who’s been watching the whole wearable fitness tracker field like a hawk. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
  • Thank you for updating! A new critical update is available.

    8 Feb 2015 | 7:53 pm
    I figure this one will strike a chord in anyone who uses Netflix on a desktop computer. For everyone else, there’s this version: I drew this on the iPad using Procreate’s pencil tools—so kind of a first. Hence the change in style, in case you were wondering. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
  • It’s alive! Aliiiiiiiiiive!

    29 Jan 2015 | 10:51 am
    Today’s cartoon was sparked (heh) when I learned about a new project supporting citizen science (and the professional kind, too): Banu. Founder Rastin Mehr‘s idea is to let anyone make their raw scientific data available online. Once it’s uploaded, others can access it using an API through a Creative Commons license. I’m fascinated by the rapidly emerging field of citizen science. Turning to the crowd for help with research, data collection and analysis doesn’t just make new resources available to the scientific community; it can build a larger, better informed…
  • Dewey

    31 Dec 2014 | 6:06 pm
    I drew (well, wrote) this right after walking the book spiral in the Seattle Public Library’s Central Library. If you’ve never been, and you find yourself in Seattle, go—it’s an architectural marvel. By the way, 2999.9 is reserved for authors other than Ann Coulter and Glenn Beck, should that be necessary. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
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    Sam Reeves Blog

  • I'm sick. Leave me alone.

    Sam Reeves
    13 Mar 2015 | 7:31 am
  • What To Do with a Sore Throat When You're Bored

    Sam Reeves
    25 Nov 2014 | 12:56 pm
  • Fantasy Sci-Fi Network Interview

    Sam Reeves
    23 Jul 2014 | 11:20 am
    Kasper Beaumont of the Fantasy Sci-Fi Network recently interviewed me. It is a bit long-winded but at least there is the occasional writer tip and ideas in the care for your favorite pet chicken. Kasper was great. I hope you like it. You can read it here.
  • Work in Progress, Progress

    Sam Reeves
    20 Jun 2014 | 8:22 pm
    Today marks exactly one month since I decided to start maintaining a consistent daily word count.  That is the longest I have ever gone without at least taking a day off. I have been tempted several times, but so far so good. I started with a very modest 250 words per day goal. Sometimes writers sabotage themselves by tackling a goal that causes them to burn out quickly. I thought that 250 words was easily do-able for a couple of weeks, which is what I have heard is the length of time required to build a habit. After that, I began increasing my daily word count by 125 words per week.
  • Father's Day

    Sam Reeves
    15 Jun 2014 | 1:16 pm
    My Father's Day presents. Happy day to my fellow fathers out there!
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    Words, Pictures, Humor

  • Speaking of speech

    25 Mar 2015 | 10:44 pm
    Recently I was asked by my alma mater to participate in a panel discussion regarding the many threats to free speech at the hands of terrorism.  We are all acquainted with the brutal and troubling ways in which this threat has played out in recent months. The panel happens April 6 at The College of William & Mary, so if you’re in the area, feel free to stop by and say hello. The alumni magazine thought it would be great to do a cover story on the same topic, and it made sense that I’d illustrate it. In terms of imagery, there are few things that have been done to death as…
  • SX Redux

    25 Mar 2015 | 8:46 pm
    I went to SXSW once again this year under strange circumstances – long story short, I was supposed to perform but it fell through but I still ended up going to the music portion (which is what I like anyway). I had a fake press conference: and I told Ronald McDonald what I thought of the fact that they weren’t handing out free Egg McMuffins despite the fact that they advertised their huge-ass music and food tent with a picture of an Egg McMuffin: and I fed “Southie,” the foam Colombian radio mascot who apparently cannot hold his queso: And I took some Instagram band…
  • Pictures of pepperoni elegantly reimagined as smaller pictures of pepperoni

    28 Jan 2015 | 1:54 pm
    Everyone loves pictures of pepperoni. Woot! But sometimes you’re browsing the web and you’re like – whoa, let’s take it down a notch or two, pepperoni pictures! I get it, you’re meaty and spicy and delicious, but do you have to take up half my screen? So I have taken up the task of reimagining what some of these might look like if they were smaller and more bite-sized, if you know what I mean. Let me know which ones you think work the best!      
  • The 10 best arty and musicky and designy and webby things that happened this year, to the best of my memory

    16 Dec 2014 | 9:06 pm
    A meta-list of notable and memorable things from 2014, in more or less chronological order. 1. Getting to see Vermeer’s famous Girl With a Pearl Earring in person, albeit with about a thousand other sweaty persons stuffed into the Frick on the last day of this Dutch painting exhibit. I couldn’t get as close as I hoped, but it was still worth it. The painting is luminous. 2. St. Vincent’s better-than-ever live show in support of her best-to-date record. I love how she shreds. And shreds. 3. A trip to Vienna, where I took in the Egon Schiele- and Gustav Klimt-heavy Leopold…
  • Merry Xmas! 2 for the price of none

    10 Dec 2014 | 8:13 pm
    OK, I like Christmas music. I shouldn’t have to apologize for it. Well, some of it. An author once said that the reason he writes books is because he has questions, not answers. Every year I put together a mix of Christmas-related music here, and it is my own attempt to address the question “where can I find good Christmas music that I’m not going get bludgeoned with everywhere else, but that isn’t just different for different’s sake?” So I’m at it again. As per usual, there’s every type of music on here – cheeky mashups, golden-era…
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    Iced Borscht » Iced Borscht

  • President Christ

    20 Mar 2015 | 5:03 pm
    Film pitch: “PRESIDENT CHRIST.” In a parallel universe, Phil Hartman is still alive, playing Jesus, who comes back to Earth to run for president. I’m envisioning concept art for the film by the Jesus With You Always web guy, who could accomplish what Ralph McQuarrie did for “Star Wars.” The movie would have a loving and warm treatment of Christ, though, and wouldn’t be snarky or mean-spirited. That is all. —— Also: Bill Murray as Ted Cruz in a Wes Anderson film:
  • Fire is a Good Tonic

    20 Mar 2015 | 2:41 pm
    Set your fears on fire
  • Current and Likely Future Mood

    18 Mar 2015 | 1:19 pm
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    Humor Volcano RSS Feed

  • Nun Has Orgasm During Beaver TSA Pat-Down

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:43 am
    The TSA's new anti-terrorist screenings now require more invasive hands-on pat-downs. Such extensive physical contact, particularly upon little old ladies, has led to increasing instances of surprise sexual orgasm, especially among nuns. [Satire]
  • New Workplace Scream Room® A Huge Stress-Busting Success

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:43 am
    Researchers recently proved that loud cursing reduces stress. Taking full advantage, a new soundproof Workplace Scream Room, where angry employees can safely vent in complete privacy, has just been launched. [Satire]
  • Obscene College Football Halftime Show Shocks Nation

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:43 am
    The entire nation is shocked when, for its director's ultimate act of revenge, a marching band performs a choreographed halftime routine showing a huge penis masturbating onto the face of the rival team's mascot. [Satire]
  • Christine O'Donnell Bloodies Delaware Democrat On Election Eve

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:43 am
    A Delaware Democratic Party resident was left a bloody, dazed mess after a U.S.Senate candidate Christine O'Donnell-inflicted injury as he reached into his mailbox on this 2010 mid-term election eve. [Satire]
  • Mobsters Behind 2010 Dallas Cowboys Embarrassment?

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:43 am
    Due to the horrid Dallas Cowboys football season thus far, the only happy people in Texas this fall are in the brown paper bag industry. They're so wildly successful, in fact, that the Mob is suspected to be intimately involved throughout. [Satire]
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    Krapsody - the place to find out of the ordinary humor.

  • Live Long and Shake Yo Booty

    2 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    RIP Leonard Nimoy 03/26/1931 - 02/27/2015 [Read Full Story]
  • RIP Kenny Loggins

    26 Feb 2015 | 8:00 am
    [Read Full Story]
  • The Grapes of Confusion

    8 Jan 2015 | 8:00 am
    | Jan. 08, 2015 If confusion is the door that wisdom comes through then what the hell is this? Just so there's no confusion, prepare to be confused. Continue reading for information that will completely blow your mind, but may ultimately frighten you and send you back to your regular routines. May... [Read Full Story]
  • 5 Reasons Jean Claude Van Damme's Mullet is the Greatest Actor in the History of Cinema

    11 Dec 2014 | 8:00 am
    | Dec. 11, 2014 Let's just get this straight. Forget his flexibility, Van Damme had THE best mullet ever. His mullet might be the only time a mullet has been successfully pulled off in the history of cinema. Look at Hard Target. Why, if it weren't for Van Damme's mullet the film would have no... [Read Full Story]
  • Go Ahead, Meme Me

    20 Nov 2014 | 9:00 am
    | Nov. 20, 2014 "1,478,954,217,389 allegations of rape? Have another pudding pop. Zipzopzubittybop!" - Bill Cosby (sources: childhood ruined -- *sobs uncontrollably) [Read Full Story]
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    Really Funny Jokes

  • Unparalleled

    Mitesh Asher
    12 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    Tina, whose popularity among the boys was unparalleled, paid a visit to Dr. Paes.Doctor Paes told her she was pregnant. He then added, "I know you are dating several guys. Do you know who the father is?"Tina was quick to retort, "If you gulped up a can of Bush's baked beans, would you figure out which bean is responsible for the gas?"
  • Way to Heaven

    Mitesh Asher
    11 Mar 2015 | 9:45 am
    Father Reynold was having a conversation with a group of kids about how good behavior could help them go to Heaven. When he had finished, he asked them, "Where does everyone here want to go?"Little Tina remarked, "Heaven!"Father Reynold asked, "And what should you be to be able to get there?"Little Harry replied, "Dead!"
  • What a career!

    Mitesh Asher
    10 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    Jeremy retired after 38 years of his career. He made USD 10,000,000 which was a result of hard work, being meticulous, proper planning, integrity, dedication, competence, smart investment. And the death of his maternal aunt who left him USD 9,999,999.
  • A matter of principles

    Mitesh Asher
    9 Mar 2015 | 12:01 am
    When Robbie returned from school, his grandad asked, "What did they teach you in school today?""I don't know" replied Robbie, "but the teacher kept talking about principles. I didn't understand one word."Grandad said, "That's not difficult to understand. I will tell you what it is. Say, I buy stuff at the supermarket, and the cashier gives me more change by mistake, my predicament would be whether to keep it for myself or follow my principles and give it to Grandma."
  • Dorothy's treatment

    Mitesh Asher
    6 Mar 2015 | 6:19 am
    Dorothy visited a shrink and told him, "Whenever I lie down on the bed, I get this mind-numbing fear that something is below the bed."The shrink said, "I have treated many phobias but this seems to be a unique case. But do not worry, I will help you get rid of it."Dorothy said, "Thank you. How many sessions will it take?"The shrink replied,"Probably 20 to 25. It will cost 75 pounds per session but by the end of it, you would be completely cured."When Dorothy did not turn up for the first session, the shrink called her. "Why didn't you come?", he asked. Dorothy replied, "When I informed the…
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    The D-MAIL

  • The Alternative History of India: Gandhi And His Bench Press

    29 Mar 2015 | 1:50 am
    If there is a man in the history of mankind to have used his capacity to bench-press 140 kilos of raw salt laden sandbags to the advantage of an entire civilization, it was this man. Unwritten but passed down from generations vocally. Tales of the Mahatma hitting the gym after a quick calorie filled bite and protein shake just after harvesting salt, the climax of the marathon Dandi march, the same morning, are now the stuff of Legend. Much to the surprise of the BBC journalist who telegraphed London, what Gandhi said to him just before he started work on his cardio: “DO U EVEN LIFT BRO?”…
  • Tying the Knot, or Noose?

    25 Sep 2014 | 2:08 pm
    By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -----------------SocratesWell that explains why India is full of Philosophy. Speaking of full, half of the Indians are below the age of 25. And if the figures are right, there will be approximately 313million marriages within the half-decade, assuming that every Indian parent is strictly speaking, Indian.  It’s nothing less than an endemic. Taking 125 million victims every year, it’s clearly far worse than HIV, Cancer or Global Warming combined!Marriage for a man is…
  • How to Long Distance a Relationship

    10 Jun 2014 | 9:14 am
    I never knew I'd be the one doing this! I mean seriously, you kids can't even handle a long distance relationship?! If you can't deal with a thing like that, what'll you do with the tougher parts of life, like choosing between The 'Endoplasmic Ectoplasms of Schrodinger's Cat' Thesis submission and updating your cover pic on fb. Well, the open secret is, Long distance relationships are way easier compared to its icky sticky counterpart. Think of it this way, it's honeymooning, but with less honey and more mooning!For those of you who're fortunate enough to experience this, let me tell you,…
  • What’s cooler THAN being ICE COLD?

    2 May 2014 | 9:04 am
    It has always been our endeavour to answer random questions asked by celebrities that were also not actually questions. The quest for knowledge is enshrined in the DNA of the writer and this post is a manifestation of such idiosyncrasies and other difficult words. “What’s cooler than being ice cold?”  Asked  Outkast, back in 2009.   Off of the top of my head I can think of the following: How about a President who is rapper? (YES WE CAN Rap!)A dictator who was a former supermodel? (PLEASE!)Maybe a Prime Minister who was once a weed dealer (once a…
  • LOST - Rewritten

    9 Apr 2014 | 9:57 am
    The whole world is abuzz and curious to find out more about the Malaysia Airlines Flight 370. Every media source is on the job, sending their best journalists, Psychics and swimmers to the probable sites. What they don't know is that the plane crashed just on the outskirts of the Banana Republic, our home base. Now, after decades of keeping the spot a secret, secreter than the Bat-cave, which is still underground at 221B Boiler Street (Sorry Bats), we're under the moral and ethical dilemma. The question here is, should we announce the crash site of the plane and risk revealing our hide-out or…
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    Funny Strange, by Lori Culwell

  • 19 Mar 2015 | 9:49 am

    Lori Culwell
    19 Mar 2015 | 9:49 am
    File this under "You Don't Say."
  • What Is Going on Here? Talking Red Velvet Oreos and more....

    Lori Culwell
    9 Mar 2015 | 12:56 pm
    You guys!   Can I just make a really lame excuse for why this blog hasn’t been updated in several months?   No joke, despite being a complete tech nerd, I did not realize that my Instagram feed completely stopped posting itself up over here, so I thought I was posting the whole time. Weak, I know.  I will admit that I haven’t been writing as much, as I’m currently attempting to manage client work with an attempt to learn a new skill (video/ animation), but that’s no excuse.   I should check over here every once in awhile! Here are some photos I have taken recently and posted…
  • TV-MA Warning (Parody)

    Lori Culwell
    18 Dec 2014 | 4:38 pm
    So, I got caught up on American Horror Story:  Freakshow last night (yikes!), and while I was watching, it struck me just how long and convoluted that pre-show warning has become. With that in mind, I wrote a parody for my hilarious voiceover rockstar husband to record, and here it is.  Not really safe for work.
  • Oh look! A Shrinky Dink ornament I made in 1979. Anyone else have one of these?!

    Lori Culwell
    18 Dec 2014 | 3:04 pm
    via Instagram
  • Stephan ponders his Christmas balls....

    Lori Culwell
    14 Dec 2014 | 11:12 am
    via Instagram
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  • Walt Disney World what have they done to you? blog
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:33 am
    Walt Disney World is fast- pass losing its pixie dust magic. I've always loved Walt Disney World. But I have to admit that great greed is ruining the loved Disney vibe of what used to be a premium experience. Some folks don't even realize it.  After all, the Disney corp has geniuses in their public relations department.    The  system now makes us work for what we have already paid for.  Then we blame ourselves if we don't get it in on a ride or a restaurant.  Maybe we just didn't reserve with enough time, etc, etc. Anything but the simple fact…
  • Tired of hard-core sex scenes in every story? blog
    10 Feb 2015 | 7:29 am
     Humans instinctively feel a need for  privacy when sex is involved.  Hell, we don't even like to talk about it.  Maybe its due to our evolution.  We started with TV couples like Desi and Lucy sleeping in double beds to explicit sex on most films and TV series. Most  find ourselves fast forwarding scene after scene. Poor actresses having to do this!  After all, they need the  job. "The Sex Scene," Shut the damn door! Isn't imagination what movies are all about? Let's get to the story. Don't get me wrong, if the movie is "50 shades of  Grey" then I…
  • Into the woods... Are you afraid? blog
    8 Feb 2015 | 7:43 am
    Are we becoming afraid of the woods? Have you noticed that every time there are woods involved in a movie, there is usually some terror lurking?  Its doing the same thing to us as "Jaws" did with the ocean; It's made us fear nature. It makes the dimwitted humans afraid of their own yard. Any natural darkness should be obliterated at once. A backyard is often just a dry patch of dirt with that anemic tree and the grass cut to one inch of its life. Birds need shelter, a bush or tree to hide nearby, worms.  A feeder without water nearby is just not enough. Lets get to it humans!
  • Home Decor: Why not make your home a sanctuary? blog
    22 Jan 2015 | 10:46 am
    Not everyone is lucky enough to own a cabin in the woods.  When we see those gorgeous homes with wooden beam ceilings and a fire going, it looks just like heaven.  But its okay.   We can still make our own sanctuary.  Even if we live in a penthouse studio, we can still have the sensation that we live close to the earth. We all know Ralph Lauren.  He is the epitome of style and country manor chic. But did you know that his name was Ralph Lifshitz?  He was not born rich. In fact he was born in the Bronx in poor surroundings. Did he let that bleak reality stop…
  • Let's Kick the Can blog
    14 Jan 2015 | 1:24 pm
    Your body might deteriorate a bit, but your soul never has to. Remember that classic Twilight Zone episode, "Kick the Can?"   Its about residents in a nursing home that were resigned to just hang around till they dropped dead.  Kind of like some of us. Anyhoo, one of them had an inspiration.  Actually the old guy got a hell of a spiritual insight. He does not dismiss it either, like most of us. Not this old guy; he went with it. In  a flash he realizes that if they would all just move around for the sake of pure pleasure; that the carefree feeling of…
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    Now That's Nifty

  • Complete List of All Jello Flavors

    25 Mar 2015 | 9:09 am
    So, I don't know about where you live, but here in Utah, Jello is a big deal. Seems like any get together involves someone bringing some type of Jello. In case you live in a cave, Jello is a flavored... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Mail Someone a Potato

    19 Mar 2015 | 9:10 am
    All of us have had the desire to mail someone a potato, but lacked the means. Well, problem solved. will mail your chosen recipient a potato. No envelope, no box, just a potato with... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Distractify - School Lunch Around the World

    12 Feb 2015 | 1:54 pm
    Distractify has some school lunches from around the world. Italy looks great. About 32 million children in the US eat cafeteria school lunches every day. As a nation with a childhood obesity... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Funny Valentines Ad

    29 Jan 2015 | 8:59 am
    Check out this funny Valentines Day ad. I wish I was creative like this. Also, what are the chances that Jodie and Alex are still together? Slim? Via ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Natural Flavoring - Castoreum

    26 Jan 2015 | 3:32 pm
    So I was pretty skeptical at first. But, sure enough, Castoreum is indeed from beaver butts, and it is indeed used in food. See here: Beaver Butts Emit Goo Used for Vanilla Flavoring. ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
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    mark a rayner

  • Apocalypse Cow

    Mark A. Rayner
    25 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Never get out of the boat. Absolutely goddamn right. Unless you were going all the way. Kurtz got off the boat. He split from the whole fuckin’ program. And me? I was off the boat the same time as Kurtz. Sure, I’d been obeying orders, but my mind was gone. I was in fields of […]
  • The five second rule

    Mark A. Rayner
    20 Mar 2015 | 7:50 am
    It was the best game of zenball ever, and the crowd was wild with excitement: the whisper of butterfly wings was deafening. The Rotrovra Koan Kangaroos had just scored their first all-in kensho, and the Targenville Half-Lotus Lions replied with a double-satori. The Roos launched a full-out dharma walk, but they were unable to penetrate […]
  • The Lost PowerPoint Slides (Ides of March Edition)

    Mark A. Rayner
    15 Mar 2015 | 8:01 am
    Julius Caesar Presents: Won’t Be King (slide 5) Don’t put that diadem around my shoulders Only King in Rome is Jupiter But you can call me King outside Italy What, you got a problem with that? Spurinna the Soothsayer presents “ooooooo” (slide 1) Beware the Ides of March! Cue the spooky music! Caesar Presents “What, […]
  • Before the Internet

    Mark A. Rayner
    14 Mar 2015 | 6:21 am
    Normally, I just nod my head in agreement with xkcd, but in this case, I must take exception. Before the Internet, life was much more exciting. There were things to do — the hard way — and much to accomplish. Not to mention all the challenging people and situations we faced before the Internet was […]
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    Chandra Clarke

  • Room For Improvement

    Chandra Clarke
    16 Mar 2015 | 7:33 am
    Chandra Clarke This week, I found an old news story about Stjepan Lizacic, who was 56 at the time, who was suing his local health authority because he says he’s become a laughing stock. Lizacic, a lumberjack, (or since he’s Croatian, a lumberStjack) claimed he started ‘enjoying housework and knitting’ after he was given a female kidney […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Please Don’t Have A Cow

    Chandra Clarke
    2 Mar 2015 | 2:33 am
    Chandra Clarke Once, pot-bellied pigs were all the rage. After that craze died down, iguanas became extremely trendy. And of course, black and white dogs always become popular when Disney revives the 101 Dalmatians franchise. This year, the hot new pet might be: the mini-cow. No, it’s not a new toy robot out of Japan, it’s a […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Stop being a martyr

    Chandra Clarke
    21 Feb 2015 | 7:52 am
    Chandra Clarke I recently had the good fortune to have lunch with some very successful women. We talked business and politics, and inevitably, as we all warmed up to one another, the conversation turned to romantic partners, family, and kids. I didn’t say so at the time, but the conversation really surprised me. Here I was with […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Doing Your Homework

    Chandra Clarke
    7 Feb 2015 | 7:31 am
    Chandra Clarke Unless you are Japanese, you probably missed it — last week was Beloved Wives Day. The brainchild of the fledgling Japan Doting Husband Association, it is a day designed to make husbands appreciate their wives more. In a country where most men are workaholics, the association suggests that husbands come home early (8 p.m.!) and do […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • The best of all possible worlds

    Chandra Clarke
    19 Jan 2015 | 6:51 am
    Chandra Clarke Theoretical physicists have many ideas about how the cosmos came to be, but one of the most popular ones is the one which says that are an infinite number of universes, each of them different. There is, for example, our universe, another one where all your missing socks go, and one for your car keys. […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
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    Stuff You Couldn't Make Up

  • When the bubble tea store runs out of pearls

    Chad Fraser
    28 Mar 2015 | 7:49 pm
    As an avid bubble tea drinker, I too feel this way when the bubble tea store runs out of pearls (tapioca or boba). I mean, let’s face it, pearls are what MAKE the bubble tea great! How can you run … Continue reading → The post When the bubble tea store runs out of pearls appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • Waldo finds himself

    Chad Fraser
    28 Mar 2015 | 7:39 pm
    Did you hear the story where Waldo finds himself?: “Plot twist. Waldo finds himself” Most of us fondly know the charming children’s story of “Where’s waldo?”  — This amusing meme puts a slightly different twist on the subject! The post Waldo finds himself appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • Take Life One Day at a Time with Humor

    26 Mar 2015 | 7:56 pm
       If life doesn’t break you today, don’t worry, it will try again tomorrow.  The post Take Life One Day at a Time with Humor appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • Do These Trucks Remind you of Pregnant Cows?

    26 Mar 2015 | 6:41 pm
       The post Do These Trucks Remind you of Pregnant Cows? appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • Pineapple Hedgehog

    23 Mar 2015 | 10:32 pm
    Here is a creative piece of food art: Pineapple hedgehog.    The post Pineapple Hedgehog appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
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    Love and Knuckles

  • Married At First Sight – A Review

    27 Mar 2015 | 11:59 am
    I consider myself an expert in train wreck television, which is why I want to share with you the gloriousness that is the A&E series Married At First Sight. Six people agreed to participate in a national television experiment (cut down from 7,000 applicants) because they have one can only assume given up on ever finding someone via normal circumstances. They have asked four “specialists” in the areas of sexology, spirituality, psychology, and sociology to use a specific matchmaking method to determine who should join in holy matrimony even though they have never met each…
  • How To Cope With Devastation Over Zayn Leaving One Direction

    26 Mar 2015 | 1:32 pm
    Yesterday Boston mayor Marty Walsh was asked during a Twitter Q&A what he thought about singer Zayn Malik leaving the band One Direction. This was his reaction. Why worry about the city’s budget or public education problems when you’ve got bigger fish to fry, Mr. Mayor. But the elected official in Massachusetts isn’t the only one having a tough time coming to grips with the band’s higher octave singing bandmate deflection. There is the rest of the world. How is anyone supposed to get work done when someone needs to light the candles around the shrine? CNN even…
  • Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Finale Recap

    25 Mar 2015 | 5:38 pm
    LESSONS There were many lessons Kim and Kyle Richards were taught as children. You must never reveal real emotions. It is better to withhold feeling and to maintain a robotic face. Longer hair is always better, even if you are a middle-aged woman and have rheumatoid arthritis. The desert is a place you should go when you need to relax or recover from plastic surgery. Passive aggressive behavior is a preferred indirect expression of hostility. Give your children names synonymous with overpriced cities, opulent lifestyles, or the make of fancy cars. But perhaps the most important lesson they…
  • How To Write a Happy Birthday Card

    24 Mar 2015 | 12:50 pm
    Birthdays are a big deal. When wishing a loved one a Happy Birthday I think it is important to make sure your message stands out from the rest. As you know, I take the same approach when writing thank you cards. You want to make sure your message expresses your excitement about their achievement in getting older, touches on a memory, and reflects their personality. Here are some examples: For twins Christina and Danielle: Feliz Cumpleanos, my lady. What better way to celebrate the anniversary of your birth than spending the day trapped at an amusement park covered in asbestos (she’s…
  • My Campaign To Join One Direction

    22 Mar 2015 | 10:27 pm
    One Direction is down one member, but the band has promised to move forward with the remaining dates of their Asian concert tour. Here’s what I am thinking: I should fill in.  Sure, it’s probably not what anyone would expect. Why would four 20-year olds in an English-Irish boy band want a mother from the Los Angeles suburbs in her 30s to round out their group? I’ll tell you why, because they need someone reliable. This kid might never return. I’ve seen enough VH1 Behind The Music episodes to know that he’s probably going to end up in rehab, have a couple kids…
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    The Idle Lord

  • Fantastic Day

    27 Mar 2015 | 9:36 am
    There I was bouncing down the motorway the other day, playing at being a corporate finance man again, off to the Steel City to “talk turkey”. The sun was shining, the M1 flowed like a ballerina and even Chris Evans could not ruin my day. It was good to be alive, hell it was good […] Continue reading ... Fantastic Day.
  • Kidnapped – The Last Great Romantic?

    19 Mar 2015 | 3:01 am
    Firstly, my apologies for a rather self-consumed blog this week but I have been under severe threat…of being dragged away for a “romantic weekend”, a fate less welcome to middle aged men than an outbreak of piles. “We need to spend some quality time together” said the Cricket Widow “before you succumb to your other […] Continue reading ... Kidnapped – The Last Great Romantic?.
  • Why We Are So Crap At Sport

    13 Mar 2015 | 9:45 am
    More humiliation for an England sporting team at the hands of a country we would long ago have considered unworthy to be on the same pitch. And yet is anybody really surprised? Sport at the highest level in England is awash with cash and yet our achievements across the sporting spectrum are dismal given the […] Continue reading ... Why We Are So Crap At Sport.
  • Bradford Man Fights For Life!

    6 Mar 2015 | 6:42 am
    Winter nets are approached by most club cricketers with a combination of dread, bewilderment and a shared belief that the destructive little red ball must have got even harder. Padding is checked with the same scrutiny of a bomb disposal expert and we make sure the Radox is ready for our return. We practice on […] Continue reading ... Bradford Man Fights For Life!.
  • Bradford Council & The Muppets – A Short Film.

    27 Feb 2015 | 3:32 am
    Some rich men came and raped the land, Nobody caught ‘em Put up a bunch of ugly boxes, and Jesus, people bought ‘em The Last Resort by The Eagles. With a predictable inevitability the morons supposedly in charge of our City voted to flatten a noble old building their votes soothed doubtless by a few […] Continue reading ... Bradford Council & The Muppets – A Short Film..
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    Barb Best

  • Competition: Does Everything Have To Be A Competition?

    Barb Best
    28 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
      Why does everything have to be a competition? No kidding! We now have competitive bubble wrap popping. Yes, there’s video below from WSJ. We have competitive cooking shows like Chopped and The Next Food Network Star on the Food Network. Of course, we have eating competitions. No longer limited to hot dogs and cherry […] The post Competition: Does Everything Have To Be A Competition? appeared first on Barb Best.
  • Dude Bait: Driverless Cars, Drones & 3D Printers

    Barb Best
    20 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
      I love my male readers! Not to pander willy-nilly to gender stereotypes, but here’s one you dudes may particularly enjoy… Technology excites me as much as a Kate Spade flash sale at Bloomingdale’s. I love the newest electronic gadget. I dig Cars! Drones! 3D Printers! You know – mechanical stuff that’s fun to manipulate […] The post Dude Bait: Driverless Cars, Drones & 3D Printers appeared first on Barb Best.
  • Welcome to Humorholics Anonymous

    Barb Best
    11 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
      Welcome, y’all!   This is the weekly meeting of HA – Humorholics Anonymous. Hmm, I see many horrified new faces here tonight. No fear. We have enough caffeine and sugar on the back table to put you in a coma – and most likely fuel some new addictions. Ha, Ha.     Sorry, I  […] The post Welcome to Humorholics Anonymous appeared first on Barb Best.
  • 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!

    Barb Best
    27 Feb 2015 | 7:00 am
      No kidding. 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!      OOPS! I’m Not Breathing. Why Not? You May Ask… I forgot My damn bra is too tight I need an APP for that Too much in love Screw it, it’s a Snow Day No Post-It note that says “breathe!” Scared to death, no iPhone reception […] The post 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe! appeared first on Barb Best.
  • 5 Absurd News Items You May Have Missed

    Barb Best
    21 Feb 2015 | 2:54 pm
      Do you find much of the news to be absurd? We live in a crazy world. We might as well laugh at the absurdity of it all. “Humor is our way of defending ourselves from life’s absurdities by thinking absurdly about them.” Lewis Mumford    5 gems from the news you may have missed […] The post 5 Absurd News Items You May Have Missed appeared first on Barb Best.
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    Amy Vansant - Humor

  • Free book and a Rafflecopter to win a bunch of books!

    Amy Vansant
    28 Mar 2015 | 4:38 am
    TWO chances for FREE BOOKS! (from me and other people) First, Moms Are Nuts is FREE!! TO EVERYONE! …until end of day Monday March 30th. This is a sure thing – you don’t have to try and win it. Just click, go to Amazon and download the Kindle version. Viola! Full of funny stories by comedians and humorist like: Wendi Aarons | Eliza Bayne | Dylan Brody | Matthew David Brozik | Becky Cardwell | Abbi Crutchfield | Sean Crespo | Gloria Fallon | Carol Ray Hartsell | Abby Heugel | Debbie Kasper | Nancy Davis Kho | Kelcey Kintner | Cathy Ladman | Kurt Luchs  | Kelly…
  • Win Many Paws (the menopause book)

    Amy Vansant
    24 Mar 2015 | 6:27 am
    I received an email from a very nice lady asking me if I would write a little ditty about the book Many Paws – The Years of Change by Susan DeGarmo. It’s – get this – a pop up book about menopause. I tried to explain to her that “woman stuff” makes me queasy and I hadn’t hit that particular milestone, (though certain aspects of it sound AWESOME) but she sent me a couple copies and I like supporting authors and dammit here I am talking about menopause. Anyhoo, they have books for everything nowadays, but this isn’t one of those cheapo “So…
  • Meeting of the Avian Advancement League

    Amy Vansant
    17 Mar 2015 | 4:44 pm
    This is a little “literary humor” piece I wrote for the Barnes and Nobel Review. It’s about birds having a committee meeting. It’s very silly. Minutes from a Meeting of the Avian Advancement League Canary sings opening anthem. Members take their branches. Image courtesy of panuruangjan at Old Business: Reports of Invisible Wall killings continue to mount.   Blue Jay retells harrowing tale of repeatedly striking an Invisible Wall just before the meeting. Claims it was cleverly posing as another angry Blue Jay. African Grey tries to explain the…
  • Reader Appreciation Event March 11-13th – Win Free Stuff!

    Amy Vansant
    10 Mar 2015 | 8:01 am
     4 p.m. to 10 pm EST Wednesday March 11 through Friday, March 13, 2015 I belong to a writer’s group called eNovel Authors at Work which is having a big Facebook party to thank our readers, reviewers and bloggers (and maybe find a few new fans along the way…).  The event is free and myself a bunch of other authors will be giving away all kind of fun stuff. The eNovAaW Authors Reader Appreciation Celebration Prizes include: Print books eBooks Gift Cards Paypal money and  other top secret prizes! Grand Prize Drawing: A Kindle! 2nd Prize: $25 Gift Card. Please stop by…
  • 5 Stages of Grief meets 50 Shades of Grey

    Amy Vansant
    17 Feb 2015 | 12:25 pm
    All writers dream of the kind of success enjoyed by 50 Shades of Grey. We agonize over our own books, tweaking and tinkering, knowing we’ll probably never make a cent for all our pain. Then, just as we’re doing cartwheels over selling two in the same day, someone comes along and sells a gazillion copies of a book about a girl who flushes and/or blushes 125 times, once “stars and stripes red.” Oh my. Oh jeeze. I used the phrase “snorted a laugh” twice in one of my novels and my editor almost died of apoplexy. But, no one wants to hear a bunch of poor,…
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    Teds Woodworking

  • Woodworking Projects Hand Tools

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:21 am
    Hardware, tools & woodworking |doityourself., The hardware, tools and woodworking section covers power tools, hand tools, fasteners, screws, safety locks, and woodworking projects to help improve your sanding. Woodworking plans, wood projects, books & tools, Official store of popular woodworking magazine offering the best woodworking projects, plans, books, videos & techniques for all your woodworking needs.. Woodworking | woodworking tools | woodworking hardware, Where expert woodworkers buy their tools. since 1972, woodworker’s supply offers woodworking hardware,…
  • How To Make A Storage Building

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:20 am
    How cost build death star? | centives, Building a massive space weapon is all very well, but you have to find the materials to build it with. it’s easy to say that “sure, the death star would be. How build greenhouse scrap – telegraph, Emmeline helps me in the garden. she and her partner, shane, have just built their own greenhouse for £100 and, in my view, it looks better than many that. Strobist: : diy $10 macro photo studio, Today we are going to learn how to build a diy light tent for product photography, for next to zero cost. even saying it costs "$10" is a bit of a…
  • Teds Woodworking Package Pdf

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:20 am
    For kids – great smoky mountains national park (., Bring the whole family for a hands-on exploration of the diversity of life within the great smoky mountains national park. together, you will discover the. Reading journal, The first video describes the globe theatre. it was built west of london bridge on the south bank of the river thames in an area known as bankside.. Woody plant – definition woody plant free dictionary, Related wordssynonymslegend: noun 1. woody plant – a plant having hard lignified tissues or woody parts especially stems ligneous plant bugbane – a…
  • Woodwork Projects Toolbox

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:23 pm
    Woodworking projects – easy & diy wood project plans | minwax, Minwax provides free novice to advanced diy woodworking and wood finishing projects and plans.. How sell homemade woodworking projects (11 steps) | ehow, How to sell homemade woodworking projects. whether you are selling kits for woodworking projects or your own completed projects, the key to making a sale. A toolbox: scrap bin challenge 2014 (cued , I make a toolbox from scrap pine, oak, and beech. this is part of the scrap bin challenge 2014. see below for the 24 participants. i hope you get some. 252 x 298 · 12 kB ·…
  • Building A Shed Kit

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:23 pm
    How build wooden ramp shed | ehow, How to build a wooden ramp for a shed. most american homeowners mow and care for their own lawns. this necessitates a wealth of lawn-care equipment, such. Cheap sheds – cheapsheds. | build shed, Don’t take my word for it. print out a materials list to take down to your local building supply store and price the cost of building your own storage shed.. How build shed, free shed plans, build !, This page contains information on how to build a shed and storage shed plans. here are a couple of things to consider before you begin this. 397 x 400 · 77 kB…
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    Rubbish In, Robish Out!

  • British Airways Flight Forced to Return Due to Smelly Toilet

    Johnny Robish
    29 Mar 2015 | 8:46 pm
    British Airways Flight Forced to Return Due to Smelly Toilet:  A British Airways plane en route to Dubai was forced to return to London’s Heathrow Airport when the smell emanating from the toilet became simply unbearable for passengers.  I should begin by saying that if you’re looking for poop jokes – urine luck because this story sounds to me like a real poo-dunnit.  I’m surprised they diverted the plane back to London and not to Phuket.  All kidding aside, if things really smelled that bad, why not just open up a few windows?   Earthquake Off Papua New Guinea…
  • Riders Becoming Too Heavy for Washington Ferries

    Johnny Robish
    28 Mar 2015 | 9:31 pm
    Riders Becoming Too Heavy for Washington Ferries:  The Washington state ferry service says it has been forced to reduce the number of people it will carry on its boats because people are so much heavier these days.  Passengers counter that they’d prefer being thought of as big-boned instead of “heavy.”   Indiana Officials Try to Stem Religious Objections Fallout:  The heat over Indiana’s new religious objections law spread across social media and to the White House as many local officials and business groups around the state tried to jump in and stem the fallout.  Let’s…
  • Report Finds Cat Litter and Salts Caused Nuclear-Dump Mishap

    Johnny Robish
    27 Mar 2015 | 9:26 pm
    Report Finds Cat Litter and Salts Caused Nuclear-Dump Mishap:  Authorities say an incompatible combination of nitrate salts and organic cat litter – which was used to absorb moisture in the waste – is to blame for a mishap that caused the release of a small amount of radioactive material, forcing the closure of the nation’s only underground nuclear waste dump.  Cat Litter?  Now I’m no nuclear scientist, but it seems to me that if you’re going to take a nuclear dump, you’re probably going to need something stronger than cat-litter to bury it.   Mercedes to Build…
  • TV Sportscaster Get 4 Years in Charity Fraud Scheme

    Johnny Robish
    26 Mar 2015 | 6:33 pm
    TV Sportscaster Get 4 Years in Charity Fraud Scheme:  Former Pennsylvania sportscaster Don Tollefson has been sentenced to serve up to four years in state prison for defrauding some 200 people out of $342,000 in a charity scheme, even though he swears he’s changed and has now “found God.”  Word has it his cellmates are hopeful he’ll be a “good sport” in prison.   Stolen Tom Petty Guitars Recovered:  Police say a private security guard is under arrest after pawning one of five precious guitars belonging to Tom Petty and his band off a Culver Studios’ sound stage at a…
  • Heinz and Kraft Foods Announce Merger

    Johnny Robish
    25 Mar 2015 | 8:51 pm
    Heinz and Kraft Foods Announce Merger:  H.J. Heinz and Kraft Foods Group, two of the most iconic names in the nation’s kitchens, said they would merge through an estimated $45 billion deal to form one of the world’s biggest food empires.  Word has it that Kraft execs felt as if the company was falling be-Heinz and needed to ketchup.   Feds Warn Public About Procedures Like Buttocks Injections:  Federal regulators caution that the recent death of a Dallas woman who had received injections at a salon to expand the size of her buttocks shows the dangers of having those type of…
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    The Laugh Button

  • This week in comedy: we went movie funding

    Max Freedman
    29 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
    - A documentary for the ultimate dirty turkey, the late Patrice O’Neal, is in the works, and you can help fund it. Oddly enough, you can fund Super Troopers 2 in the same way. The latter campaign has already reached its goal, though; in fact, it broke this $2 million dollar mark in merely one day. People […] This week in comedy: we went movie funding appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Trevor Noah is the current favorite to replace Jon Stewart on The Daily Show

    27 Mar 2015 | 7:29 pm
    As we know, Jon Stewart is marked to step down as host of The Daily Show later this year. As far as speculation as to the replacement we know there’s a short list. But now it appears one of the show’s correspondents has emerged as the front runner. Variety is reporting that South African comedian […] Trevor Noah is the current favorite to replace Jon Stewart on The Daily Show appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 movie clip “Bean Bag Marble Shootout”

    Mark Says Hi!
    27 Mar 2015 | 1:50 pm
    Here’s a clip from the upcoming sequel starring Kevin James. Blart is the “master” of the Segway, but it’s a bunch of marbles that finish the job in this clip. Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 hits theaters April 17. Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 movie clip “Bean Bag Marble Shootout” appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • NBC orders 13 new episodes of 90s comedy Coach starring Craig T. Nelson

    Mark Says Hi!
    27 Mar 2015 | 12:08 pm
    Coach, the sitcom starring Craig T. Nelson as football coach Hayden Fox, will be back on television this fall. NBC has ordered a new 13 episode season of the 90s sitcom. Coach has been off air for the past two decades but Nelson is set to reprise his role. The original series of Coach aired on […] NBC orders 13 new episodes of 90s comedy Coach starring Craig T. Nelson appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Trailer for new Starz comedy Blunt Talk starring Patrick Stewart produced by Seth MacFarlane

    Mark Says Hi!
    27 Mar 2015 | 11:14 am
    Patrick Stewart is Walter Blunt in Blunt Talk, a new comedy created by Jonathan Ames and Executive Produced by Seth MacFarlane. Coming this summer to STARZ. Trailer for new Starz comedy Blunt Talk starring Patrick Stewart produced by Seth MacFarlane appeared first on The Laugh Button.
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    Chasing Carrots - Blog

  • Danger Panda Shirt

    30 Mar 2015 | 12:34 am
    Danger Panda was arrested nearly a decade ago as he was found with his friends robbing, and destroying a local drug store. During the arrest his friends were killed for attacking the police. One of the arresting officers mistook Danger Panda for a victim in the robbery, and as he tried to offer him help, […]
  • The Fish In The Sea

    6 Jan 2015 | 1:51 am
    On a mostly unremarkable morning a few years back, as I was walking from my house down my street, there was a chance meeting which would change my life for many years to come. The sun was shining brightly that day, it’s light was painful on my halve awaken eyes, so I gazed mostly downwards […]
  • Imagine Dragons – Radioactive – Lyrics – Video

    15 Dec 2014 | 11:09 pm
    I decided to post this Imagine Dragons music video here which features Lou Diamond Phillips and Alexandra Daddario, not so much because I enjoy the beat, which I do, but mostly because of all the awesome puppet violence it contains. Enjoy “Radioactive“ Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh Whoa, oh, oh Whoa I’m waking up to […]
  • Chick Chick – Rollin Wang

    22 Nov 2014 | 8:14 am
    Over recent years, pop groups from various countries have been increasingly using YouTube as a vehicle to launch their culture on the world. This is yet another in a long list of pop songs that has invaded my music memory as of late, while I am busy wishing I could think of something else. Please […]
  • Chewie Goes Surfing Shirt

    29 Sep 2014 | 8:27 pm
    On Sept 4, 1958, Pierre La Francais, the world’s most famous beverologist, was investigating reports of animal activities at the base of the Mackenzie river delta near Tuktoyaktuk. On this full moon night, moments after a shooting star, a large brown figure began to make it’s way down the beach towards Pierre. Pierre put his […]
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    Bytes And Banter

  • Cricket World Cup 2015- The semifinals

    23 Mar 2015 | 1:37 pm
    Four very one-sided quarter-final matches have resulted in the advancement of four most deserving teams into the semi-finals. Pressure on the sides would be immense as they look to take a step forward towards lifting the Cup.It is that stage of the tournament where the skills won't matter. Infact, its the way the sides handle pressure that is going to make the difference. The first semi-final would see the 'chokers' face each other; a couple of teams which have qualified for the knockouts time and again only to succumb to pressure. On the other hand, the second semi-final would be contested…
  • What Cricket Teaches Us...

    13 Mar 2015 | 3:13 am
    Cricket, being a team game and a popular sport worldwide, teaches us many lessons in life. Sportsman spirit, team leadership and mental toughness are a few attributes one can pick up courtesy of cricket. In this article, I discuss three crucial life morals, a true cricket fan would relate to.To begin with, what history teaches us is that you've got to be all-round in order to be successful over a period of time. The Australian cricket team, ten years ago, was often considered invincible. They had explosive batsmen at the top of the order and good finishers constituting the middle order.
  • Cricket World Cup 2015-The Contenders

    10 Feb 2015 | 10:41 pm
    With just three days to go for the biggest cricketing extravaganza to kick off, I couldn't have thought of a better time to return to my blogging ways.Just like the 2011 edition, the World Cup this year too promises to be fiercely competitive as the sides look to get the team combinations right in order to dominate world stage.Here, I analyse the top eight teams and examine their chances of winning cricket's most coveted event, scheduled to be played Down Under.Australia: Inarguably the favourites to win the Cup, Australia, on paper, seems to be the team to beat this season. It proudly…
  • The Lumbering Loner

    8 Jun 2014 | 9:13 pm
                                 Chapter 2:Sam visits Shawn's placeShawn was, by nature, a submissive and a timid person. However, fortunately for him and all those who believe in humanity, he had a brother who was very different. While Shawn was known for making heavy weather of cases of villainy, his brother used to solve them in the most ingenious of ways. Sam was, in fact, one of the most reliable and sought-after detectives in the whole of the country. There was just the one mystery that had remained inexplicable in…
  • Supertraits of Superstars by Priyanka Sinha Jha

    8 Mar 2014 | 12:17 am
    Bollywood has become synonymous with money and fame; the stories of young actors, struggling to make it in the industry only to later blossom as wonderful actors, are all that we hear about the stars. Little do we know about the effort, conscious and subconscious that go into the making of such a star.With examples from eleven different Bollywood stars' life, Priyanka Sinha Jha brings about a new dimension wherein she highlights the important qualities in each actor which propelled them forward to make them the star they are now. Big B's Discipline, King Khan's Passion, Vidya Balan's…
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    Uploads by Scott Kushman

  • Funny KISS Paul Stanley Parody

    21 Mar 2015 | 9:06 pm
    Funny KISS Paul Stanley Parody Paul Stanley calls in to the Morning Fail Show from McDonald's. From: Scott Kushman Views: 84 0 ratings Time: 02:06 More in Comedy
  • Burger King Cologne

    21 Mar 2015 | 8:42 pm
    Burger King Cologne Burger King Cologne. From: Scott Kushman Views: 17 0 ratings Time: 02:43 More in Comedy
  • TV News Consultant fails the Morning Fail Show

    21 Mar 2015 | 8:41 pm
    TV News Consultant fails the Morning Fail Show TV News Consultant fails the Morning Fail Show. From: Scott Kushman Views: 7 0 ratings Time: 01:22 More in Comedy
  • Brian Williams Scandal

    21 Mar 2015 | 8:40 pm
    Brian Williams Scandal Brian Williams Scandal Scott's afraid of being replaced by him. From: Scott Kushman Views: 20 0 ratings Time: 02:09 More in Comedy
  • Breaking News Lauer Dance

    21 Mar 2015 | 8:39 pm
    Breaking News Lauer Dance First you break the news then you Matt Lauer Vogue! From: Scott Kushman Views: 14 0 ratings Time: 00:31 More in Comedy
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    Witty Woman Writing

  • Does Your Primal Fear Stack Up?

    24 Mar 2015 | 9:25 pm
    Global warming scares the hibbie-jeebies out of me. I picture polar bears drowning, the air unbreathable (thank you China), the oceans polluted beyond repair, nukes being tossed over by Russia, and Kim Kardashian as first lady. Dear God Almighty…just kill us all now.
  • When Good Friends Turn Out To Be Bad People. Get Ready, It’s About To Get Ugly.

    10 Mar 2015 | 7:41 pm
    I’ve had my belly full of unsolicited advice, ill spirited innuendo and “friendly” recommendations. I am not amused. I very recently had an in depth conversation with a newly made friend who wanted to level with me. Allow me to level it right back. Let’s do this. I am well aware that if I used […]
  • If You’re Over The Hill, Prepare To Get Thrown Under The Bus

    24 Feb 2015 | 9:07 pm
    The point is, age does not equal ignorance, incapability, or unwillingness. To think so, however, does equal inexperience, unawareness and stupidity.
  • Is It Just Me, Or Does Valentine’s Day Suck?

    10 Feb 2015 | 10:54 pm
    Women love it, men dread it and singles hate it. Welcome to Valentine’s Day. When I was newly married (eons ago), one of my first Valentine’s Day gifts was a Hoover vacuum. Clearly he had missed the meaning of the occasion. Sadly this was not the worst gift I’ve ever received on the day of […]
  • Those Were The Days, My Friend ….

    27 Jan 2015 | 10:31 pm
    Remember when you were younger (much younger) and you thought your life was crap? Fast forward 40 years or so and look back. Turns out it was pretty damn awesome and you don’t remember being miserable about all the things you didn’t have. I recently posted a TBT (Throw Back Thursday) picture on my Facebook […]
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    Epiphanies that will Alter the Course of Human Events

  • Make the Most of Micro-Idle Time

    Greg Mischio
    16 Mar 2015 | 5:00 am
    Is our culture work-obsessed, money-obsessed, or maybe just obsessed? It’s hard to tell the difference. What I do know is that we’re so busy, we don’t even know how to waste time anymore. That is, until I discovered micro-idle time. I’ve always been proficient at being a lazy bum. Even as a child, I was a prodigy in the wasting time arena. I was the only kid at the playground with his own Lazy-boy. In high school, I lettered in sitting idly by. I slept to noon during summers off, and until 1 pm during school. Then something terrible happened. I grew older. I got married. We had…
  • Use Your Writing to Climb the Corporate Ladder

    Greg Mischio
    9 Mar 2015 | 5:00 am
    Publishing a book is not the only way you can make money from your writing. You can also use it to scare the bejabbers out of your co-workers and climb the corporate ladder. I used to work for a rather humungous corporation. Hunkered down in my cubicle, I played the part of a worker-bee. I never sought a promotion, knowing that the only way to advance would to be through political maneuvering and backstabbing. I’m quite adept at those tactics at home, but in the workplace, others were much more gifted. I watched legions of weasely types slit the throats of co-workers on their rise to the…
  • Eliminate Verbal Communication

    Greg Mischio
    2 Mar 2015 | 5:00 am
    People belly-ache about having to respond to so many text, email and Facebook messages. I have a simple solution: Let’s go with the digital flow, and eliminate verbal communication. According to some statistic I just made up, the average American spends 26.5 hours a day texting and typing digital responses. Email is like those dudes from Hydra: Delete one, and two take its place. Something’s gotta give, folks. And the answer is quite is simple. It’s time we stop talking to each other. Just think about how inefficient human speech is. Consider the conversation with my daughter at…
  • The Pizza Extremists

    Greg Mischio
    23 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    News headlines are filled with harrowing stories of religious and political extremists carrying out horrifying attacks. For once, can’t we have an extremist who is cool? I think that would be nice, thus I’ve launched the Pizza Extremists. Personally, I don’t think it would be much fun to be an extremist. Granted, you’ve got the guarantee that your god will reward you in the afterlife for killing his innocent creatures. But still, burning people alive and slaughtering innocent children doesn’t seem like it’s all that pleasurable – for you or the victims. The typical extremist…
  • The Poo and Pee Comedian

    Greg Mischio
    16 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    Why are there so many potty mouth comedians? I believe it’s due to oppressive parents who never let us get the scatalogical giggles out of our system. That’s a huge opportunity missed, and it led to my latest epiphany. The genesis of the Poo and Pee Comedian can be traced back to a conversation I had with my son when he was but a wee lad. (Wee as in small, not as in ‘wee wee.’) I picked him up from kindergarten, and he was giggling as we drove home. “Did something funny happen, young man?” I eyeballed him in the car seat. “Yeah,” he replied, doing his best to contain himself.
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    Funny Google Autocompletes and WTF Search Suggestion Fails » Funny Google Autocompletes and WTF Search Suggestion Fails

  • Why Do I Keep Hitting Myself With A Hammer?

    18 Mar 2015 | 12:06 pm
    Come on, we all need a past-time. Why can’t ours be hitting ourselves in the face a hammer? Have you tried it before? There you go then! How do you know you don’t like it then? Why were people searching it? Are any of you familiar with the TV series Grey’s Anatomy? Well, from the 2005 episode The Self-Destruct Button, Dr. Meredith Grey says the following: “Okay. Anyone who says you can sleep when you die… Tell them to come talk to me after a few months as an intern. Of course it’s not just the job that keeps us up all night. I mean if life’s so hard…
  • Firefox Has Crashed And Needs Cuddles

    18 Mar 2015 | 11:44 am
    Great! Firefox has crashed yet again! We are torn between Firefox crashing all the time and IE being slow to award the award for the worst browser of all time. We guess we’ll have to switch to Chrome. If only we wasn’t too lazy to download it. Why were people searching it? For the three of you that are probably unaware, Firefox’s logo is a fox. Add this to the fact that if your browser is like ours and crashes every now and then and you’re onto why this had been added to Google’s autocomplete. Basically, over the years people have created memes based around…
  • My Cat And I Have Decided To Stay In Tonight

    18 Mar 2015 | 11:18 am
    I know… we really wanted to come out tonight as well. It’s the cat, he’s so demanding. He’s ruining our life! We have had zero social life since we’ve had him. “No one was at the door, Steve. You must be hearing things. ” Why were people searching it? This is down to a t-shirt slogan with none other than the words “my cat and i have decided to stay in tonight”. We guess it’s a great excuse not to go out at the weekends so why not slap the phrase on some clothes? What’s that? Are we coming out tonight? We are sorry, but my cat…
  • I Ran Over My Cat With A Lawnmower

    18 Mar 2015 | 10:58 am
    “Honey, did you like the cat? No reason, Honey. No nothing is the matter. What breed did you say he was again? No, Honey, don’t come outside, I have everything under control. Honey, this is a man’s job! Your job is in the kitchen! Let us stick to what we know best. I can’t her you because of the lawnmower.” Why were people searching it? In 29 Aug, 2012, at precisely 5:31 PM, the comedian Will Farrell took to twitter and wrote: “I ran over my cat with a lawnmower. I guess you could say. *takes off glasses* I tore that pussy up.” Oh Will Farrell and his…
  • My Cat Wants Me To Get An Abortion

    18 Mar 2015 | 9:52 am
    Your cat wants you to get an abortion? Is the baby his? If so then you do need to take his opinion into consideration. If not, tell him to do one and you’ll do what you want! He’s not the boss of you! Tell him to keep his furry paws out of matters that don’t concern him. Why were people searching it? Yahoo Answers is to blame here. An unknown person (who will now be known as Laura, seeing as a username is missing on Yahoo Answers) consulted the popular question and answers site claiming her cat was dead set on her aborting her unborn baby, stating the cat’s meow…
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  • 25 Very Real Situations Perfectly Immortalised In GIF’s

    Jade Waddy
    16 Mar 2015 | 8:57 am
    We’ve all seen GIF’s we can relate to, you might see one and think “yeah, I must look like that”. There might even be a GIF or two saved to your computer, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. This is a list of 30 situations, we frequently come across, that have been perfectly represented by the ever powerful GIF. That moment when you realise you’ve probably drunk too much coffee, or had too much sugar…Google+When you have your ego stroked…Google+When you see someone you care about having a bad dream…Google+When someone challenges you and…
  • Parent Hacks – 16 Ways To Childproof Everything

    Jade Waddy
    12 Feb 2015 | 9:03 am
    We’ve all been there, if you don’t own a cheeky little monkey then you’re related to one or have friends with one. You can’t escape them, sometimes they’ll be physically stuck to you. But not to worry, as we’re here to help ease the pain with these cheap and simple ways to childproof your life!1. Get yourself some plastic cookie cutters to use as locks on cupboards.Flickr2. Put crazy straws in your child’s cup (must have lid) upside down so they can’t pull it outMade In China3. Want to keep them away from metal scissors? Simply put a lock…
  • The History Of Light [Infographic]

    Jade Waddy
    12 Feb 2015 | 7:44 am
    Have you ever wondered how we first came across the idea of using light to our advantage? Well we surprisingly started doing this in 13,000 BC when cavemen used shells filled with animal fat soaked moss on fire. It’s since grown into something quite spectacular, as you can see from this timeline style infographic from MMA Consultancy. Created by MMA Consultancy Source: Array
  • What Happens In An Internet Minute – 2013 VS 2014

    Jade Waddy
    19 Dec 2014 | 2:04 am
    Who else likes the internet? You’d be hard pressed to find a single human being, that isn’t a baby or elderly person, that doesn’t use it in one way or another. It’s interesting to know exactly what everyone gets up to online, we’ve all got a slightly nosy nature inside us or an inquisitive attitude to life. This fantastic infographic by Tech Spartan looks at what we all did online over the last 60 seconds, what we did last year and how much certain companies have grown because of it. Created by Tech Spartan Source: Array
  • What Not To Buy People For Christmas [Infographic]

    Jade Waddy
    11 Dec 2014 | 5:55 am
    So Christmas is almost here and we’re getting ready for the chilly weather and that all important Christmas holiday. But many of you won’t have bought all of your presents yet and that’s terrible. But don’t worry as below is a cool infographic by Boxman showing you what you should not be buying for Christmas according to latest statistics. No more socks and shower gel, please!  Source: Array
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    Above Average

  • Budget Cuts

    Steve Dickinson
    28 Mar 2015 | 5:05 am
  • Cats, Cats, Not A Cat, and Will Ferrell Singing

    Above Average
    27 Mar 2015 | 2:46 pm
    Above Average’s staff answers the question: What’s the best thing you’ve seen on the internet this week? Here are our staff picks for some casual reading. Cats Stealing Pizza. - Ryan Spears   CATS This turned into this: – Patty Izquierdo   Not A Cat – Katherine Shoemaker   The Office In honor of The Office’s 10 year anniversary, my pick is PRISON MIKE. - Anita Flores    Disturbed Man Tries To Get Into White House Ted Cruz is getting me really excited for 2016. - Josh Poole   Will Ferrell Sings Star Trek Theme His voice is angelic. - Audrey…

    Above Average
    27 Mar 2015 | 2:29 pm
  • “Are You Gonna Eat That?” Is The Anthem Food Lovers Have Been Waiting For

    Above Average
    27 Mar 2015 | 12:20 pm
    The latest video from comedy duo Rhett & Link is an anthem for anyone who has ever stolen food off someone else’s plate. It escalates quite quickly as they go from scavenging off people’s plates to eating raw eggs and bird feed. Food always tastes better when it’s not yours. Check out some of our original music videos when you’re done eating that song.  
  • Decoding Your Friends’ Vague Facebook Statuses

    Glenn Boozan
    27 Mar 2015 | 12:14 pm
    “Vaguebooking” is the new internet phenomenon that’s been sweeping the nation. I did some research and according to my 15-year-old stepbrother, Vaguebooking is when a friend posts an ambiguous status on Facebook to get attention. Frustrating, right? Fortunately for you, I’m on the case. I asked you to send me your most mysteriously infuriating Vaguebook statuses to decode their meanings:   Shakespeare was right when he said, “Brevity is the soul of mysterious-ness.” Here’s what “it” probably is: a promotion, loan money to start a smoothie place, the game ball,…
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    The Life Lessonbook

  • Runaway Jury

    25 Mar 2015 | 4:43 am
    I apologize in advance for this post being short, but I am currently very busy living a lifelong dream. As one person put it in the introductory video I had to watch Monday morning, I am engaged in “the highest call of duty an American citizen can answer after military service.” I am on jury duty. I have never understood why people hate getting jury duty. You get paid time off of work – which everybody seems to enjoy – to be part of an episode of Judge Judy or Law and Order – which are two of the longest-running TV shows of all time for a reason. PLUS they pay you! Twenty dollars a…
  • A Fate Worse Than Wedgies

    18 Mar 2015 | 4:52 am
    When you’re in 9th grade, you’re afraid of a lot of things: voice crackage, pretty girls, body odor at inopportune times, etc. But as a freshman in high school, one thing terrified me above all others. Wedgies. I joined my high school’s soccer team because I liked the idea of sports. My talent ensured that I would never see the field, but my age allowed me to participate in one very special tradition. The initiation ceremonies always occurred while returning from away games. Somewhere around Medina, Ohio, one lucky freshman would hear his name chanted from the back of the bus. If the…
  • It’s a Tradition

    11 Mar 2015 | 5:12 am
    Deserae and I have different feelings about Chipotle that are summed up by the following quotes: “Chipotle is a pretty good fast casual restaurant that does not make me feel horrible when I eat it.” – Dustin Brady. March 11, 2015 “Wouldn’t it be amazing if I quit my job and started working at Chipotle?” – Deserae Brady. Multiple occasions Deserae’s dream is to eat a steak taco bowl every meal for the rest of her life. She gets irrationally angry any time someone suggests that Moe’s Southwest Grill is better than Chipotle. One time I took her to Chipotle on Valentine’s Day,…
  • Deep-Fried Disaster

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:31 am
    One of the best parts of becoming an adult is the moment you realize that you are now capable of getting that thing you always wanted as a kid. Dirt bike? In-ground pool? Tree house with a giant TV? It’s all good! YOU HAVE A CREDIT CARD NOW! One of the worst parts of becoming an adult, however, is the following moment. That’s when you realize that as an adult, it’s no longer acceptable to spend money on dumb junk. You can usually push through this realization while you’re still single, but if you’re married? Good luck. Since we’ve been married, Deserae has shot down almost all of…
  • Bags and Bags of Cash

    25 Feb 2015 | 4:59 am
    Most of life’s lessons sneak up on you when you’re least expecting them. Monday’s lesson was not one of those. In a venture that I’m sure I’ll write more about in the future, Deserae and I have recently started selling things online. It has been going well. This Monday, it started going REAL well. By 6 p.m., we had tripled our previous high day for sales. At 7 p.m., we found a new treasure trove of items to sell. By 8 p.m., I had used the word “goldmine” at least three times. At 9 p.m., I sent a text with nine money bag emojis. So when I drove into a pothole at 9:30, I knew…
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    RhymeZone Forums

  • Jacqueline Burke is now Jacqueline Bird by Bobbydelboy

    Bobby Del Boy
    29 Mar 2015 | 6:17 am
    A bluebird sits on the feeder, just outside my window. It's a sign that your still with us, one you said you'd show. She's a beautiful bird with deep blue feathers and her breast has an orange glow. Every time I look at her, she whispers "Good Morning Boe!" I've decided to name her Jacqueline. She sits on the feeder and tells me where's she's been. "I've got so many stories, I don't know where to begin. I've soared to the heavens, planets and stars, and back to earth again. A better time have I had in my life, I really can't remember when!" "There's beautiful gardens…
  • Choices

    28 Mar 2015 | 6:40 pm
    Choices should be like Brush Strokes Cast onto a brick wall, With purpose; yet acceptance, Never knowing how each strand will fall. Paint with Vibrancy and Danger, Once love finds you, Chase Her! Beautiful mistakes favour the Brave, Never think you might need an Eraser. Live till the paint runs dry. Until something forms before you, A picture speaking the only thousand words needed to explore you. Your Identity, Your Message, Your Mind, Your Heart, That someone could easily mistake for abstract art. But when you're nothing but dust.. a passer-by just might, Catch a glimmer; at a certain…
  • Poetical prisoner

    28 Mar 2015 | 2:29 pm
    You are welcome in my heart and you can hold me by the hand but if you peek inside my mind there's things you'd never understand... Through the automatic motions goes the nomadic mime tumbling face-forward to stay ahead of his climb Misunderstood, as he's ahead of his time Ahead of his mind...ahead of his rhyme Crying, sighing, stumbling blind his fingers moving rapidly toward words he's trying to find but a sign-language rhyme doesn't rhyme when it's signed A poetical prisoner trapped inside his own mind The unspoken word his claim to fame and charades is more than just a game No one knows…
  • A fill-in-the-blanks love letter

    28 Mar 2015 | 1:56 pm
    Dear ______, It's been _____ months since you've called my name and the moment you did was the moment I came but just like all the other times before you call me when you need me, then you don't call me anymore When you broke up with _____ and your heart was broken from your trembling lips my name was spoken I tried to show you life wasn't over, rather a brand new start People will always fail you, but I am your heart When you lost your job at _____ and fell into despair You asked for my help, and again I was there I tried to show you that money is not worthy of praise Be special, and shine,…
  • Food for Thought by Bobbydelboy

    Bobby Del Boy
    28 Mar 2015 | 6:57 am
    How we love our food. we're always in the mood. Vegetables that are stewed. and a beer perfectly brewed. A culinary delight, bliss with every bite. Wash it down with a glass of white, the foodies are happy tonight. The time is always right, Temptation's hard to fight, when your feeling heavy, there's always something light. Sometimes we can cheat. Spices add some heat. cilantro's hard to beat, don't forget the sweets. Vendors on the streets, offering delicious treats, the perfect meet and greet, enjoy and bon appetite.
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    The Name's Ponyboy

  • I Like These (32)

    28 Mar 2015 | 7:00 am
    Have a great weekend and treat yourself to something nice. The post I Like These (32) appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • GIF Pony (13)

    27 Mar 2015 | 12:00 pm
    I picked these 13 just for you…. The post GIF Pony (13) appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • Bubble Wizard

    27 Mar 2015 | 9:30 am
    I remember back in the day when I was little I saw a guy late at night smoking cigarettes and blowing crazy bubbles on TV.  It was amazing!  Check out this video I just discovered by Ana Yang a bubble performer who is doing some cool stuff.  What happened to this lost art of Bubble Blowing?  I want have a Ponyboy stage show and incorporate all this cool shit into one evening with an open bar!.  Check out the video. The post Bubble Wizard appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • I Like These (32)

    27 Mar 2015 | 6:30 am
    Happy Friday, let’s do it! The post I Like These (32) appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • Best Booty March 2015

    26 Mar 2015 | 12:00 pm
    Here’s a collection of the Best Booty pics I collected this month. These made the cut and now it’s up to you to vote on the best.  5 for amazing and 0 for disgusting.  You can check out January and February’s here.  Let’s go… 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 543210 The post Best Booty March 2015 appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
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    Winston's Random Musings

  • A Singapore nerd's humble tribute to our Founding Father Lee Kuan Yew (1923-2015)

    Winston Chong
    23 Mar 2015 | 9:53 pm
    A colour photo that reflects the mood of a nation in mourning of a great leader that can never be described in black and white.Feel sad?We should feel lucky to live from third world to first within a short 50 years in this sunny island set in the sea.Mood black? You shouldn't, when you have the freedom to taste all the colours of the rainbow in this little red dot, regardless of race, language or religion.Why mourn? When we should celebrate his remarkable brilliance for future generations to emulate so that his spirit will live forever.My little note above is published in Singapore…
  • Pinned post: What you WOULDN'T find in this blog

    Winston Chong
    21 Mar 2015 | 7:06 pm
    1. Porn: there are loads of online sexperts providing an excellent hand-y job in this area already.  2. Personal porn: you can have a ball of a time elsewhere ogling at female bloggers slash model slash actress slash race queen providing revealing selfies. No need for this nerd to pimp himself.3. Food porn: I don't own a DSLR nor do I get to eat for free. iEat, iBurp, iShit. 4. Word porn: I find scolding jerks using vulgarities or genitalia a lazy cop-out. There are far more flowery words to choose to insult someone with greater effect.5. Social porn: no inspirational quotes or…
  • All in a day's work in Singapore - real-life office stories as told to me (Part 9)

    Winston Chong
    17 Mar 2015 | 9:41 pm
    Red reigns supreme in the spectrum in the corporate world. Whether you are devising a blue ocean strategy, launching a green initiative, writing a white paper, or organising a black-tie gala event, you will always be strangled by miles of red tape.World's best colleagues"My colleague made me realised that I should cherish my quiet moments which I am at my most productive... whenever this colleague is not in the office.""The only thing worse than a colleague who has forgotten your name is when she addresses you with the name of another colleague who you absolutely hate.""I can read my…
  • Happy New Years

    Winston Chong
    17 Feb 2015 | 5:44 pm
    Those who have already broken their 1 Jan resolutions on the Western calendar can have a second shot at the Lunar New Year which starts tomorrow. And if that fails, aim for the Malay calendar or the Indian one. This privilege only applies to Singaporeans since everyone around the world knows how the country enjoys racial harmony and a Singaporean always has three friends from different races as depicted on government posters and TV commercials.Let's assume that the annual Chinese Zodiac horoscope is 100% accurate notwithstanding the multiple versions floating around. Then by extension, the…
  • Wishing all a great 2015? meh

    Winston Chong
    31 Dec 2014 | 7:46 pm
    Wishing all my friends a great 2015 sound so insincere since each friend will only get a fraction of my total Wish Power which will be meaningless. Instead I'm gonna direct 100% of my total Wish Power to the one person that needs all the luck in the new year - ME. And if everything goes well, I should become a millionaire in 2015 as long as nobody wish me 100% of his/her bad luck which will effectively cancel each other out.
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    Funny Lifestyle & Relationship Blog With A Snarky Twist: MelanysGuydlines - Melanys Guydlines

  • Don’t Do These Things At A Social Media Conference

    24 Mar 2015 | 12:41 am
    And…. commence packing ….again! I hate packing but have decided not to fully empty my suitcase any more because I am always on the road. Thanks to BMW for giving me this M suitcase so I can travel in style. And where am I off to next? Well, Social Media Marketing World in San Diego, CA. This is by far one of the best conferences and I highly suggest attending if you have the chance. Last year, I wrote a post called 16 Things Not To Do At (Any/Social Media) Conference and I just re-read that post and LOL’d. No... Continue Reading
  • March Madness Makes Me Social: Win With ArizonaSOCIAL

    20 Mar 2015 | 9:04 am
    It’s one of my favorite times of the year! Bring it on! What am I talking about? I am talking March Madness tournament people. Of course, it makes it a lot sweeter that I just got back from watching my University of Arizona Wildcats win the Pac 12 championship in Las Vegas last week and that they won yesterday for their first showing in the NCAA tournament. If you haven’t noticed I love my sports, music, fashion, snark and can’t help but share with you on this blog. The 6 questions I get asked all the time are: What do... Continue Reading
  • Are You Feeling Lucky This St. Patrick’s Day? You Need VH1’s Walk of Shame Shuttle

    17 Mar 2015 | 3:18 pm
    Happy St. Patrick’s Day to all of you! Hope you have a fantastic day today. Pinch me! I just got back from Las Vegas and have over 2000 emails to check so not sure I will be having the most memorable celebration until I get through all of these. Then, I can promise you I will need a bunch of drinks. I did come home to one of the cutest packages from VH1. They sure thought I was going to get lucky tonight. Check out this adorbs Walk of Shame Survival kit from the new hit show, “Walk of Shame... Continue Reading
  • Spring Beauty Essentials: evian® Facial Spray & Giveaway

    10 Mar 2015 | 8:27 am
    My travel schedule is insane the next month! They are all good things though. I am off to Las Vegas for the Pac 12 Tourney, then San Diego for Social Media Marketing World and then to New York for the Shorty Awards (fingers crossed because I am a finalist in blogger). With all this travel, my poor skin takes a beating. I mean really. So, I found this little trick a while back and it is called evian® Facial Spray. It is a little bottle so it fits in my purse and when I look a little less than snarky,... Continue Reading
  • It Is International Women’s Day Every, Single Snarky Day!

    8 Mar 2015 | 10:34 am
    Today is International Women’s Day and I come from an amazing family of exceptional women. I am very proud to be a strong woman and owe that to my grandmother, mother, and sister as my daily inspirations in life. The word “Hero” is the only choice to describe all three of them. They are and were my strength and what pushes me to be a better woman every day. Being a determined, hard working woman... Continue Reading
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    The University of the Bleeding Obvious

  • Announcing the iSpong

    24 Mar 2015 | 5:17 am
    It was with great excitement that Apple announced the impending launch of its new iSpong.
  • Bean Legacy

    12 Mar 2015 | 6:48 am
    Christian Bale is Mr Bean in 'Bean Legacy'
  • The Art of Backpedalling

    9 Mar 2015 | 3:55 pm
    Government Minister Rick Boils has been forced to apologise for suggesting that using unemployed people as ballast for the new HS2 project was 'inhuman'.
  • Golden Plinth

    5 Mar 2015 | 2:33 am
    Next week... ooh, let's say Tuesday... Naples plays host to the 40th Annual Awards for Excellence in Television and Film...
  • See the Pyramids across the Thames

    28 Feb 2015 | 1:21 am
    The Great Pyramid of Giza is on tour.
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    Welcome to The Midside

  • The Give & Take Edition

    24 Mar 2015 | 9:28 am
    Some people say life is just a big game of give & take. To that we say “pfffft” but still discuss the things given to and taken from us this week–Starbucks’s Race Together, a new zombie (sort of) show, and our image of Humphrey Bogart as a “tough guy.” Stream in and you’ll be sure to never look at the meaning of the word victim the same way again. You can take that to the bank.
  • The Here to Stay Edition

    17 Mar 2015 | 12:05 am
    As the dead come back to the people they love in A&E’s The Returned, we discuss the things that are inexplicably here to stay including tension in Ferguson, Community, and Male Disposability. Note: This episode is not sponsored by Flonase.
  • The Planetary Edition

    9 Mar 2015 | 10:48 pm
    The moon may be a harsh mistress, but global warming caused ISIS. Meanwhile, Planet Fitness is a judgement free zone. Believe it or not, this episode is not out of this world unbelievable, even if Will Forte is The Last Man On Earth.
  • The Most Illogical Edition

    2 Mar 2015 | 9:45 pm
    This week we say goodbye to another great. To honor Leonard Nimoy we take on the most illogical–net neutrality and the black and blue dress. Also, in TV with JML, Justin reviews the Battle Creek premiere and Dan’iel reviews House of Cards Season 3.
  • The Everything Isn’t Awesome Edition

    23 Feb 2015 | 10:29 pm
    As Daniel takes the week off, Justin brings in another gay to back up Elliot’s Oscar analysis and is promptly double-teamed. No, wait, that sounds wrong. Oh, who cares? It’ll get you to listen. 
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    GiGi Eats Celebrities

  • Once Upon A Time… I Had A Large Intestine: Part 2

    27 Mar 2015 | 5:40 am
    For Part One… CLICK HERE  Can I just tell you that the fun I had getting barium enemas… Was match-less?!  No wonder I am no longer amused when I go to an amusement park. The best part about this procedure? The “prize” at the end of course… That I would need to have a colectomy**! Ha! Screw that GIGANTIC stuffed kangaroo at the carnival, I want to have my large intestine removed instead (oh and as a bonus, take out [Read On!]
  • Once Upon A Time… I Had A Large Intestine: Part 1

    24 Mar 2015 | 5:55 am
    Let me paint a little picture for all of you… But bear with me… I am no Vincent Van Gogh. Close your eyes and envision a girl… Laying on the cold, tiled bathroom floor… Gripping her knees and constantly thrashing about like a fish out of water… Sobbing and yelping like a dying Hyena. As she rolls in an out of consciousness the only thoughts that go through her mind are: “If this is what it feels like to give [Read On!]
  • Notsa Carbonara

    18 Mar 2015 | 5:33 am
    Have you ever been caught in a treacherous F-5 tornado filled with hail the size of pick-up trucks, hungry great white sharks, sharp machetes, an angry and drunk Chris Brown and the father of all monsters in Greek Mythology: Typhon? Well if you can believe it, my parents had to endure such harsh conditions on a near daily basis until I was about 14 years old, when they “slayed the beast” or in other words: sent me to boarding school. These [Read On!]
  • Food Babe? More Like Food Bitch

    3 Mar 2015 | 6:06 am
    Hey babe, you know what’s really uncool? When you completely BLOW ME OFF because you’re “too busy”… No, no, no, I am not complaining about my “secret Valentine“… I’m actually complaining about another “babe” that most of you may actually know of… THE FOOD BABE. Are you ready for a bit of a rant? You may want to grab some energy-boosting chia seeds… Scratch that, you’ll probably need the fuel of a Thanksgiving FEAST to power through with me. So [Read On!]
  • Protein-Packed Crunchy Love Bites

    24 Feb 2015 | 8:16 am
    You know that one day of the year (that happened to have just past) where everyone showers their loved ones with flowers, candies and chocolate hot sauce in bed other gifts (ahem, how many of you got engaged and/or married on this day?)? Well I don’t get why showing your love for others is dedicated to only one single day of the year… Shouldn’t you be experimenting in the bedroom on the daily? You see, my Valentine’s Day wasn’t all that different from any [Read On!]
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  • Sunday giggles – Destination procrastination

    28 Mar 2015 | 6:28 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersSunday giggles – No matter what one will say, if Sunday doesn’t at some point rhyme with procrastination, you’re purely and simply not doing it right. No worries though, if you have made your way to us, you obviously have things under control, and are favorably responding to your body’s dominical needs. Long story short, time for a handful of Sunday funnies. Wishing you a chillax PMSLweb moment! This post Sunday giggles – Destination procrastination appeared first on PMSLweb , home of the Internet Scavengers!
  • Saturday PMSL – Your weekend chuckle zone

    28 Mar 2015 | 3:43 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersSaturday PMSL – For those who have decided to dedicate part of their weekend to recklessly surf the world wide web, jumping from wave to wave without any real precise destination; our virtual chuckle grounds welcome you. Why not take a few minutes to catch a breath, grab a drink (beverage will probably depend on your current time zone, but then again it’s the weekend, so standard rules do not always apply) and scroll down in order to see what we put together for you today. Wishing you a lighthearted PMSLweb moment! This post Saturday…
  • Crazy Thursday – Your daily dose of guffaws

    26 Mar 2015 | 8:38 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersCrazy Thursday – We hope that you have made it smoothly to Thor’s weekly milestone, and wish to remind you that things (the most often) only tend to get better as of now (well at least until the end of the weekend, needless to say). Forty eight hours to go before the weekend officially kicks-in ; well, for those concerned, as weekend workers must seriously start to hate our guts by now, yikes (so sorry peeps)…. And in order to spike up the mood a tad, here’s our daily selection of funnies. Wishing you a giggle-powered PMSLweb…
  • Hilarious Hump day – A midweek collection of funnies

    25 Mar 2015 | 7:59 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersHilarious Hump day – Time for you to start working on letting go of some of the ballast that you have unintentionally been building up since the beginning of the week. In order to help you with this frantic – but oh-so necessary – task, we’ve put together a mid week selection of funny pictures, which we hope will contribute as far as mood enhancing is concerned. Wishing you a smile-packed PMSLweb moment! This post Hilarious Hump day – A midweek collection of funnies appeared first on PMSLweb , home of the Internet…
  • Fun pics – Your daily shipment of online funnies

    24 Mar 2015 | 7:19 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersFun pics – Quoting president Dwight D. Eisenhower himself: “A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done”, and we definitely tend to agree. In most circumstances, humor will turn out to be a top notch asset which combined with wit, will help you win over the heart of even the most reluctant individual or assembly, as well as dissipate any awkward tension which can be generated in specific situations. Anyway, time to end the thesis, and get stuck into the funnies….
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  • Study shows toddlers act like little drunk adults, even when not intoxicated

    29 Mar 2015 | 8:57 am
    A recent study demonstrated that toddlers act like little drunk adults, despite whether or not they are intoxicated. Dr. Scott Moore and colleagues from the Alcohol and Drug Research Institution had children, ages 2-6, play by themselves in a room.... Read More ›
  • Chlamydia really looking forward to spring break

    28 Mar 2015 | 6:58 pm
      As spring break approaches, local sources reported that chlamydia is super excited and preparing to hit the beach. Chlamydia stated that it will probably go to Panama City Beach, FL, and hopes to meet a ton of new people and make lots... Read More ›
  • Carmax employee has no idea where red Honda Accord located

    28 Mar 2015 | 8:49 am
        Carmax employee Greg Holt recently told sources that he has absolutely no idea where to find the red Honda Accord. Although several families have expressed interest in this specific car, Mr. Holt stated that there are like a... Read More ›
  • Local Teen Waitlisted At ISIS

    27 Mar 2015 | 2:21 pm
    Originally posted on The Lonely Petunia:NEW YORK, NY—Despite submitting a solid application and having several letters of recommendation, local teen Jeremy Swanson was put on the ISIS waitlist yesterday, sources confirmed. “I thought my essay titled ‘Death to America’…
  • Weather woman accurately predicts past weather

    27 Mar 2015 | 9:21 am
    Michigan based weather woman, Melissa Blake, gains popularity as she continues to predict past weather with perfect accuracy. Her current weather forecast predicts that there is a 100% chance that it will rain 20 minutes ago. She also stated that... Read More ›
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  • The Business of Freelancing, Blogging, and Books, According to Author Jennifer Armstrong

    Mark Armstrong
    27 Mar 2015 | 8:16 am
    First, I should note: I am not related to Jennifer Armstrong. But! I have followed her writing closely over the years — first during her years at Entertainment Weekly, and more recently as the author of books like Mary and Lou and Rhoda and Ted (Simon & Schuster), which offered a definitive history of the classic TV series. Her blog also happens to be a must-follow on She gives glimpses into her current work (she’s doing a Seinfeld book next) and she’s refreshingly transparent about the business (and hard truths) of being a freelance writer in 2015. I spoke with…
  • New Themes: Saga and Satellite

    Caroline Moore
    26 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Happy Theme Thursday, ladies and gentlemen! Let’s take a look at our two newest free themes, Saga and Satellite: Saga Saga, designed by the talented Justin Tadlock, is a theme tailor-made for writers, by a writer. The theme’s impeccable typography and attention to detail make for an enjoyable reading experience, and with support for large featured images and multiple post formats, Saga is flexible enough to be used as a photoblog, a personal journal, or a tumblelog. Read more about Saga on the Theme Showcase, or activate it on your site from Appearance → Themes! Satellite…
  • Press Publish Livestream

    Andrea Middleton
    25 Mar 2015 | 12:40 pm
    Kathy Cano-Murillo will present on how she became A DIY Success. Press Publish, the very first blogging conference organized by, will be held in Portland, Oregon, this Saturday. (Psst! We’ll be in Phoenix hosting Press Publish on April 18th, 2015.) Erick Prince-Heaggans will present Around the World in 80 Posts. Because this is the first event of its kind, we’re eager to get as much feedback from attendees as possible. And since it’s not always easy for people to travel to attend conferences, we’ve decided to bring Press Publish Portland to you (or at least to your…
  • This April in Blogging U.: The Return of Writing 101!

    Michelle W.
    23 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    This April, we’ll be offering Writing 101: Building a Blogging Habit. Writing 101 is a write-every-day challenge designed to help you create a writing habit and push you as a writer, while publishing posts that mesh with your blog’s focus. What is Writing 101? Writing 101 is a four-week course that runs from Monday, April 6, to Friday, May 1, 2015. Each weekday, you’ll get an assignment that includes a writing prompt and an optional “twist”; prompts are your topic inspiration for the day, while twists push you to experiment with writing techniques and tools. Who else is…
  • New Themes: Resonar and Scrawl

    Takashi Irie
    19 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Happy Theme Thursday, all! Today I’m pleased to present two new free themes designed especially for longform writing. Resonar Designed by yours truly, Resonar is an elegant blog theme with full-screen Featured Images. It’s perfect for blogs about fashion, food, or design, and the layout works especially well for longform features with large images. The combination of gorgeous images and beautiful typography creates posts that make an immediate visual impact. Read more about Resonar on the Theme Showcase, or activate it on your site from Appearance → Themes. Scrawl Scrawl,…
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  • Marlon Brando Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    27 Mar 2015 | 10:51 pm
    Read the best of Marlon Brando quotes. Quotes by Marlon Brando, American Actor. The more sensitive you are, the more read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Wuthering Heights Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    27 Mar 2015 | 5:32 pm
    Enjoy the best of Wuthering Heights Quotes. Love Quotes from Wuthering Heights. Heaven did not seem to be my home; read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • James Dean Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    27 Mar 2015 | 4:45 pm
    Enjoy the best of James Dean quotes. Famous Quotes by James Dean, American Actor. I think the prime reason for read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Apocalypse Now Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    26 Mar 2015 | 11:58 pm
    Enjoy the best of Apocalypse Now Quotes. Quotes from the movie Apocalypse Now. Kurtz: We train young men to drop read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Johnny Depp Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    25 Mar 2015 | 1:04 am
    Enjoy the best Johnny Depp quotes about love and life. Quotes by Johnny Depp, American Actor. I was a weird read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
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    I Hate Working In Retail

  • Insane Police Chase Involves Criminal Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart

    IHWIR Admin
    14 Mar 2015 | 2:01 pm
    Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart We take you to British Columbia, Canada where one wrongdoer took police on an extraordinary chase. Footage from a police helicopter, police cruiser dashcam and store surveillance video show a bizarre pursuit of a man on a motorcycle that happened around 1:50 p.m. on Feb. 20. In the nearly […] The post Insane Police Chase Involves Criminal Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 25 Surefire Ways To Get Your Server To Hate You

    IHWIR Admin
    14 Mar 2015 | 10:32 am
    1. Leave them a different type of “tip” Source: “My suggestion about their hairstyle is surely more valuable than their ability to pay the bills.” 2. Snap your fingers to get their attention. Source: dave-daring They are dogs rather than human beings, after all. 3. Complain about your food after you’ve eaten all of […] The post 25 Surefire Ways To Get Your Server To Hate You appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 24 times Starbucks was too much to handle

    IHWIR Admin
    12 Mar 2015 | 3:32 pm
    Starbucks is the centre of many people’s lives. It’s where the day starts, it’s where lunch happens, it’s where you go to work or, more specifically, where you go to pretend you’re working. There’s one in every town, on every high street, there’s simply no escaping the allure of that strange green lady. Lots of […] The post 24 times Starbucks was too much to handle appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
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    I Hate Working In Retail

  • Insane Police Chase Involves Criminal Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart

    IHWIR Admin
    14 Mar 2015 | 2:01 pm
    Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart We take you to British Columbia, Canada where one wrongdoer took police on an extraordinary chase. Footage from a police helicopter, police cruiser dashcam and store surveillance video show a bizarre pursuit of a man on a motorcycle that happened around 1:50 p.m. on Feb. 20. In the nearly […] The post Insane Police Chase Involves Criminal Racing His Motorcycle Through A Walmart appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 25 Surefire Ways To Get Your Server To Hate You

    IHWIR Admin
    14 Mar 2015 | 10:32 am
    1. Leave them a different type of “tip” Source: “My suggestion about their hairstyle is surely more valuable than their ability to pay the bills.” 2. Snap your fingers to get their attention. Source: dave-daring They are dogs rather than human beings, after all. 3. Complain about your food after you’ve eaten all of […] The post 25 Surefire Ways To Get Your Server To Hate You appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 24 times Starbucks was too much to handle

    IHWIR Admin
    12 Mar 2015 | 3:32 pm
    Starbucks is the centre of many people’s lives. It’s where the day starts, it’s where lunch happens, it’s where you go to work or, more specifically, where you go to pretend you’re working. There’s one in every town, on every high street, there’s simply no escaping the allure of that strange green lady. Lots of […] The post 24 times Starbucks was too much to handle appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
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  • absrdCOMEDY’s #IFiredYouBecause via @SmashtagWars: The Top Picks

    Smashtag Wars
    29 Mar 2015 | 1:41 pm
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor @SmashtagWars recently rocked the house with #IFiredYouBecause!! Here are the top picks! Not enough pieces of flair #IFiredYouBecause — Bill the Butcher (@NotBTB) March 28, 2015 #IFiredYouBecause I couldn't watch you eat lunch anymore… — Jill (@11MyJam) March 28, 2015 #IFiredYouBecause you showed little, if any, respect for the office furniture. — Fadedessence (@Fadedessence) March 28, 2015 #IFiredYouBecause you're afraid of my Guatemalan-ness!
  • absrdCOMEDY’s #HowIWonWrestleMania via @hashtagskirmish & @JKCallawayYAY: Top Picks

    JK Callaway
    29 Mar 2015 | 1:37 pm
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor Here’s our Top10 for yesterday’s Skirmish #HowIWonWrestleMania along with a couple from host @jkCallawayYAY and our co-host @LisaVikingstad. Thank You EVERYONE for playing along! Join us again next Saturday April 4th at 1pmEDT/10amPDT for our next Skirmish co-hosted by @SinCityChiGirl! I talked to my opponents about my feelings until they got uncomfortable and left. #HowIWonWrestleMania — The Conquistadork (@ElConquistadork) March 28, 2015 I offered him a movie role and he forfeited #HowIWonWrestleMania…
  • absrdCOMEDY’s #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words via #FridayFondue: The Top Picks

    29 Mar 2015 | 6:30 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor #FridayFondue recently rocked the house with #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words!! Here are the top picks! Droids, but not these… #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words — Derrek Niles (@DeeNiled) March 28, 2015 Last seen: Pitying Fool #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words @KaceyecaK — Orlando Jones (@OGOrlandoJones) March 28, 2015 #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words Saw Radio Star last… — Mark Hanson (@MHanson62) March 28, 2015 Like a douchey Beetlejuice #DescribeTheSuspectIn4Words…
  • Hollywood Rockin’ Wrap Up – Week of March 22nd

    Jason Hadley
    28 Mar 2015 | 4:25 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor The Hollywood Rockin’ Wrap Up is a daily, one-minute radio segment that pokes fun at today’s gossip headlines. Highlights from the week of March 22, 2015! Check out the Hollywood Rockin’ Wrap Up Daily on Facebook! Host and Comedian Jason Hadley delivers Monday-Friday radio listeners a one-minute shot of celebrity gossip…with a comedy Twist! Contact your favorite terrestrial, internet, or satellite radio stations and demand The Hollywood Rockin’ Wrap Up today. © Absrd Comedy, LLC – a parody site for entertainment purposes only.
  • absrdCOMEDY’s #MyMomAlwaysSaysIn4Words via @AfterFFriday: The Top Picks

    Damian Vanore
    28 Mar 2015 | 4:10 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor This Week #MyMomAlwaysSaysIn4Words Trended #4 In Canada And #1 In The US For Over 8 Hours! 17k Tweets!!! Just The Top Ten This Week As I Am Crossing The Country!!! #DoWork 10. Tell less dick jokes! #MyMomAlwaysSaysIn4Words @DamianVanore23 @AfterFFriday — Mitchell Alan (@HeyMitchellAlan) March 20, 2015 9. [insert any inappropriate 4-word Puerto Rican curse phrase] #MyMomAlwaysSaysIn4Words @AfterFFriday — Alicia (@justAlicia5) March 20, 2015 8. We were just wrestling. #MyMomAlwaysSaysIn4Words @AfterFFriday —…
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    Peak Perspective

  • Memory Lane; How Science is Planning to Make a Few More

    28 Mar 2015 | 7:44 pm
    I love learning about the brain. I’m continually unearthing new research revealing fresh discoveries that must make the neuroscientists who discovered them leap up and down like seven-year-olds when you tell them you’re taking them to the local ice cream parlor for a double scoop. Some of the studies are astonishing. Most of the studies […]
  • The Road to Hell is Paved With Snowplows

    21 Mar 2015 | 8:09 pm
    I’m having one of those days. Everybody has them. Everyone is familiar with them. Nobody likes them. And we all nearly collapse with gratitude at the end of them. I call them: Good For Nothin’ Days. Or: Why Me Why Now? Days. And even: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DOES ANYONE STILL MAKE CALGON?! Days. […]
  • Living in a Crack House

    14 Mar 2015 | 7:45 pm
    “It is NOT possessed!” I shout into the phone to one of my friends, who—because she allows me to shout at her when necessary—is exceptionally dear to me. And that is a number one rule of friendship in my book. To truly be friends, you must be able to display your well-developed lung power and […]
  • Shedding Light on the Seat of Power

    7 Mar 2015 | 8:12 pm
    Today was an interesting day. Today I found a small section of my brain where, upon closer inspection, it was revealed that a couple synaptic plugs had come loose from their sockets and were lying about on the floor not contributing to the overall brain function capacity assigned to my person. Sparks were flying, but […]
  • Don’t Rock the Boat (or Car or Truck)

    28 Feb 2015 | 7:57 pm
    When asked to make a list of my least favorite things to do, I’d likely answer in this order: — Walk barefoot across burning coals to prove my physical courage as a warrior and gain the approval of any ancient Native American spirits that still linger on my land, as they occasionally show their displeasure […]
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    Robot Butt

  • Your Weekend Jam: “Can’t Get Enough” By Bad Company

    Steve DiMatteo
    28 Mar 2015 | 6:40 am
    Bad Company is such an underrated band (Maybe? To be honest, I’m really not sure if they are, I just know that I never hear anybody talking about them. Plus, everybody loves saying something is underrated to appear like a far more accomplished and intelligent entertainment connoisseur. So guess what? Bad Company’s underrated as hell.). That’s why, for this weekend, you should listen to “Can’t Get Enough,” the first track from their 1974 kick-ass self-titled debut album.Bask in Bad Company’s underrated glory as you feel yourself becoming better than…
  • Area Man Wang Dong Eager to Begin Teaching at Local Middle School

    Robot Butt News Corp.
    27 Mar 2015 | 6:28 am
    BOSTON - John Thomas Middle School is getting a new social studies teacher, and he just so happens to be an alumni himself. Wang Dong once roamed the halls of the school, and the 29-year-old is returning to shape the minds of today’s area youth.“When I went to school here, the classes would just drag on forever. They may have changed schedules since then, but I promise, while these lessons won’t be long, they’ll certainly be hard,'” Dong said.“As a teacher, you want to rub off on as many kids as possible,” he said about his new job.
  • I Don’t Care About the New ‘Star Wars’ Because I’m Still Bitter About Darth Maul

    Steve DiMatteo
    26 Mar 2015 | 4:56 am
    People love to rag on the Star Wars prequels, and for good reason. For the total running time among the three movies, about 5% of it is watchable.But there has always been one element to these movies that was even remotely comparable to the greatness of the original three films. That, of course, is Darth Maul, the greatest badass in the entire universe. That insanely terrifying Satanic face (with that look, though, did he ever even stand a chance to choose the path of the Jedi?), his even more terrifying silence, the way he could take on two Jedi at once. I was 11 years old when The Phantom…
  • This Is a Picture of Wayne Knight As a Penis (Very NSFW)

    The Robot Butt Staff
    25 Mar 2015 | 1:05 pm
    From Newman on Seinfeld to Nedry in Jurassic Park, Wayne Knight has played many iconic roles. Now here he is as a penis.
  • Sports Illustrated Has a Long History of Screwing the Cleveland Indians

    Steve DiMatteo
    25 Mar 2015 | 4:43 am
    We’ve seen how this plays out before. When the Cleveland Indians are featured on a Sports Illustrated cover, all hell breaks loose. It is the foreshadowing of a doomed future, an inescapable fate that lays waste to entire seasons and players’ careers. The pain inflicted upon the Cleveland Indians at the hands of Sports Illustrated dates back to the 1950’s and brings us all the way to today, as the Tribe’s Corey Kluber and Michael Brantley grace a regional cover of the magazine’s latest issue.This was supposed to be the year the young Indians broke through and…
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  • Why You Should Have Sex With Your Husband EVERY Night

    29 Mar 2015 | 2:00 pm
    Similar to your role as a mom, your husband might lose track of his male testosterone qualities. Treat him like a man and make him feel loved. It’s astounding what a man who feels good will do for a good woman. You’ll wonder why you didn’t insist on having sex every night sooner. A mom with young kids is an ultimate expression of womanhood. But it’s a huge job and not always a booster for “femininity”, the type of specialness you feel when intimate with your man. Take time for sexy lovemaking and find yourself again through his touch. Romance that makes your heart thump and hands…
  • People who steal more time from your daily life than you know

    29 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    Reed Hastings, Nexflix CEO The post People who steal more time from your daily life than you know appeared first on
  • NASA’s ‘Supernova Sunday’ was beautiful and awesome

    29 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    While most of America was preoccupied with a high stakes football game this weekend, NASA’s Twitter was pumping out their annual “Supernova Sunday” full of amazing photos of supernovas, nebulas, and other space junk that’s both beautiful and fascinating. The post NASA’s ‘Supernova Sunday’ was beautiful and awesome appeared first on
  • These people may have missed the point

    28 Mar 2015 | 8:00 pm
    The post These people may have missed the point appeared first on
  • The most American review of all time!

    28 Mar 2015 | 6:00 pm
    The post The most American review of all time! appeared first on
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    Pranks - WTFisdit

  • This Dog Discovers How To Drink Water

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:00 am
    Most pups have a tough time figuring out when someone is going to feed them or give them water. Thankfully this smart pup figured out how to drink water whenever he likes. Original Link: for awesome videos every day!: us on FACEBOOK: us on TWITTER: vids on INSTAGRAM: vids on VINE: TO WATCH NEXT:How to Feed Kookaburras:…

    4 Mar 2015 | 5:45 pm
    Yesterday’s episode: me make fun of everything! MERCH:

    4 Mar 2015 | 5:29 pm
    Download any audiobook for FREE! me make fun of everything! MERCH:
  • Canoe Fail Slowly Starts Sinking Into the Water

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:00 pm
    During riding a canoe down Black River Falls in Wisconsin, these river rats got into a little trouble when water started coming into the canoe. Original Link: for awesome videos every day!: us on FACEBOOK:<br />FOLLOW us on TWITTER: vids on INSTAGRAM: vids on VINE: TO WATCH NEXT:Monkeys Invade Kayaker:…
  • The Most Disgusting Man in The World!

    4 Mar 2015 | 2:35 pm
    Excuse me. I didn’t mean to burp and fart on purpose at the Santa Monica Pier. Watch JStuStudios Video►► Buy The Pooter here►► SUBSCRIBE!► FOLLOW ME!Twitter►►<br />Instagram►►
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  • Batman,The man with a plan!

    22 Mar 2015 | 9:12 am
    Batman is the man with a plan! The post Batman,The man with a plan! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • Guide To Skirt Length At Job Interviews!

    22 Mar 2015 | 9:04 am
    Guide To Skirt Length At Job Interviews The post Guide To Skirt Length At Job Interviews! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • Don’t you dare!

    22 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
    Don’t you dare The post Don’t you dare! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • White Supremacy!

    22 Mar 2015 | 8:58 am
    White Supremacy The post White Supremacy! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • A thought provoking chart!

    22 Mar 2015 | 8:38 am
    A thought provoking chart! The post A thought provoking chart! appeared first on Punk'd.
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  • It’s Paris Fashion Week Theater – Send in the Clowns

    16 Mar 2015 | 8:16 am
    If I wanted to see fashion theater, a theatrical production showing new styles, I would see Cindy Lauper’s “Kinky Boots” on Broadway, once again. Viewing Paris Fashion Week, I watched gratuitous loads of overly stylized, over-the-top productions. Way too many brands staged highly conceptualized shows highlighting unlimited artistic expression by the stylists. The result was hair, makeup and staging which overshadowed the clothing. What exactly were the designers selling? Clothing? Hair/makeup, music, front-row celebrity image making? As a fashion viewer, I was entertained,…
  • Ello! In the trenches at London Fashion Week

    3 Mar 2015 | 6:52 am
    Reporting from Control Central, a.k.a. my “fashion war room”, as I like to call it, on London Fashion Week. Rapt without a blink for 5 days straight of a fashion-palooza of Fall 15 runway shows, a minimum of 5 browser windows open. Sustenance and props sit close by in the form of multiple salty snacks, a pink punk wig, lip balm, (an absolute necessity during high salt intake, 8 hours a day) coffee, dark chocolate and live streaming of, my favorite music channel. The first show had me chirping because they used reds and pinks in their design palette–my fave color…
  • The Mourning After: Black is A-L-I-V-E at NY Fashion Week | NY fashion week 2015

    24 Feb 2015 | 6:18 am
    I have been fascinated with death since I was a child. I grew up in a devout Catholic family, straight off the boat from 1960s Communist Poland. I would often hear my grandmother crying and lamenting over her sister who died of consumption and her “soul mate” husband, killed by the Germans. She had no qualms telling a five year old “I can’t wait to meet Jesus and be united with my sister and husband.” Death, normally a topic dismissed, was always a point of discussion in my family. Consequently, I am fascinated with the inevitable–death, heaven and God. The…
  • I Have a HEART ON for you: Love in an inflatable world | valentines day love story

    9 Feb 2015 | 1:55 pm
    Valentine’s Day is supposed to be a day when couples demonstrate to each other their affection via cards, gifts and food. Commercialism has dictated these customs and we’re reminded to follow closely via the media. I have always eased the minds of bygone boyfriends by assuring them that I don’t want to celebrate Valentine’s Day. It is a day that can make both parties terribly insecure and calls into question the nature of the relationship. Instead, this day should celebrate love. I can’t tell you how many times I have met men and women who ‘have…
  • Making a Blanket Statement at Couture Fashion Week 2015

    29 Jan 2015 | 6:39 am
    A new fashion item has been introduced into the fashion world bringing the way we dress to a new low. It’s a natural addition to the array of comfortable, shleppy staples that Americans have increasingly embraced over the past decade. What could this item be, joining the ranks of fleece hoodies, Ugg boots, outdoor pajamas, wearable bath towels and yoga wear? A blanket, of course! Yup, people are draping blankets over their shoulders, around their necks, wearing them outdoors in winter 2015. Why do you ask? Because they’re warm, comfy and elevated loungewear. After all, the Snuggy…
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    Noiseless Chatter

  • Golden Slumbers

    Philip J Reed
    29 Mar 2015 | 6:33 pm
    Just a few short words about where I’ve been. Or, one short word: asleep. This entire week or so I’ve been feeling drained and lethargic. As best I can tell, it’s due to a medication I’m on, which has recently had its dosage reduced. This is good news, at least on the whole. But my body seems to want to hibernate until it adjusts…and that’s been problematic for a few reasons. The most visible to you is probably the lack of updates on this site. It’s something that I hope gets rectified soon. Especially since there’s something I really want to…
  • Better Call Saul Reviews: “RICO” (season 1, episode 8)

    Philip J Reed
    24 Mar 2015 | 1:54 pm
    Ultimately, what we all want is to be accepted. Socially, professionally, romantically, sexually, emotionally, intellectually, artistically…the specifics differ from person to person, but everything we do, everything that drives us, everything that gets us out of bed in the morning and keeps us limping through this confusing, frustrating, impossible dance of civilization comes down to a desire, in some way, in any way, to fit. Jimmy McGill is no exception. And that’s heartbreaking. On Breaking Bad, Saul Goodman filled the role of comic relief. It made sense there, and eventually…
  • ALF Reviews: “Turkey in the Straw: Part 2″ (season 3, episode 8)

    Philip J Reed
    19 Mar 2015 | 6:00 am
    Welcome back! This week we… Oh, fuck. It’s this Thanksgiving hobo thing again? Jesus. Yeah, it’s part two. Of two, thankfully; we can take some solace in that at least. And if you didn’t catch last week’s episode, no worries; this one opens with over two minutes of clips from it. Having said that, if you didn’t catch last week’s episode, fuck you; none of the clips tell you anything that maters. It’s really strange. If you’re going to show a recap, at least make it relevant to what we’re about to see. Instead it’s overt,…
  • Better Call Saul Reviews: “Bingo” (season 1, episode 7)

    Philip J Reed
    17 Mar 2015 | 5:36 pm
    I wondered what it would take to push a man over the line, to stop him saying “Absolutely not” and start him saying “Yes, please.” [This episode] has that answer; you just make “absolutely not” lead, reliably, to tragedy. That’s from my review of episode three. After this most recent installment, I have to say I think I got it right. “Bingo,” as they say… At the end of that episode, Jimmy McGill found the Kettlemans camping out. That encounter quite specifically (and quite literally) led to a payoff here. What song was it that the family was singing when he…
  • ALF Reviews: “Turkey in the Straw: Part 1″ (season 3, episode 7)

    Philip J Reed
    12 Mar 2015 | 6:00 am
    At long last, we get to ALF‘s Thanksgiving episode. Hooray! And it’s…complicated. I’ve got a sort of toleration/hate relationship with this one…and, to be honest, the second half could sway me in either direction. But that’s a story for next time. We’ve got plenty to talk about before deciding if this two-parter is a heap of shit. This episode opens with ALF teaching Kate how to use her new microwave oven, and while the joke is both lame and nonsensical (ALF is reading instructions from the VCR manual, which somehow takes ages for either of them to…
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    All Jolene

  • Just Ask An Expert
    29 Mar 2015 | 2:57 pm
       I saw a help wanted ad on Monster looking for a “Director of First Impressions”. Sounds sort of prestigious huh? Well, it is actually a receptionist position that pays $8.00 an hour. I think first impressions are worth a lot more than that. Titles are funny to me. We can’t really escape the work titles they slam upon us. I have been a “Life Enrichment Coordinator” (activity director), a “Guest Support Specialist” (maid) and a “Director of Employee Affairs” (HR). Why can’t we just call shit what it is? There is no need to fancy…
  • Living as “The Other”
    28 Mar 2015 | 8:51 pm
        How does it feel to be the “other”? I am not talking about the other woman. I am talking about the “other” folder on Facebook. Are you aware that this exists? Most of my friends are not. But yes, it is real. Check it out sometime. In your “other” folder you will find messages from five years ago. It took me a couple of years to realize I had an “other folder”. When I did finally discover it, it turns out I had some pretty cool messages. A lot of messages enticing me to buy sunglasses as well. So, when you open up your Facebook on…
  • Head Banging
    27 Mar 2015 | 12:02 pm
        It seems I have an abnormally large head. It gets in the way, a lot. It causes me many headaches, literally. Let me give you an example. Yesterday, I was at the drive-thru of my bank. The woman starts talking to me over that intercom thing and she sounds like one of the teachers from Charlie Brown. You know, “Whaa, whaa, whaa”? I somehow think if I stick my head out the window and get closer to the speaker, I will be able to understand her. I say “What?” and she repeats her Charlie Brown garble. I put the dumb smile on (the kind we use when we have NO idea what…
  • Does Anyone PAY In This Business?
    26 Mar 2015 | 2:20 pm
       So, I worked my butt off to earn my degree with honors. I searched for work until I came to the realization that with the high cost of daycare and the low wages my field has to offer, I would actually be PAYING to go to work. I started Plan B; becoming a Freelance Writer. Little did I know, that actually meant writing for FREE. It isn’t easy for me to accomplish something during a typical day. I have a small child at home who is quite demanding. If you don’t respond promptly, she WILL throw something at you. She is a total monster and the sweetest thing simultaneously. It is…
  • Me VS The Machine Pt. 2 (I lose Again)
    25 Mar 2015 | 1:17 pm
        I hate to admit that technology has handed my ass to me again but, even I know when I have been defeated. The original idea seemed simple enough. I was trying to put together a 1 minute film to enter into a contest. 3 days later, the mission has still not been accomplished and I am ready to destroy the next machine that gets in my way. Because I have pictures, videos, slides and sound clips in various places, I ended up using 5 different computers just to collect all of the media I wanted. Plus, one computer has a file converter, one has my video camera software installed on it, one…
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    Don't Burn The Ribs

  • Thai Garlic Shrimp (and really cheap wine)
    28 Mar 2015 | 5:29 pm
    Originally, I was really excited about sharing my Thai Garlic Shrimp recipe, especially after weeks of blogging about things like pole-dancers, men in capes and other important issues like cauliflower shrinkage.  I figured my six followers, who thought this was a food blog, would be anxious to see an actual recipe. But when I went to the grocery store to get the ingredients my focus faltered. I discovered that the “affordable” wine I like was on sale. I’m not talking about one or two dollars off here, I’m talking about “BUY ONE GET ONE FREE.” affordable…
  • You Can Dance on a Pole (that don’t make you a ho)
    20 Mar 2015 | 6:56 pm
    One of the many side benefits of studying in Miami is that during the (sometimes long) drive to class (got to love the I-95) you get to keep up-to-date on all of the latest pop songs. In fact, since the radio plays the same 10 songs over and over until you want to pound your head against the steering wheel, you find yourself able to sing along. After a little while, you attempt to download Pandora on your phone but when that fails, you go back to the tried and true technology of the CD. For a while you sing along to some of your Canadian favourites like Sarah McLachlan, Alanis Morissettte and…
  • Cat on a Stick & Spicy Coconut Peanut Sauce
    14 Mar 2015 | 1:42 pm
    There are those who might call this dish “Chicken Satay & Spicy Coconut Peanut Sauce.” They might think that calling it “cat” is less than appetising and opt for a traditional name that’s less offensive, like “Chicken.” I can understand that. But when you have a smart ass neighbour who calls the dish “Cat on a Stick” and then he won’t let the name go, you’re stuck with “cat on a stick” no matter how hard you try to change things. The name catches on, and soon people start dropping stray cats at your door…
  • Cauliflower Rules!
    26 Feb 2015 | 11:47 am
    Yesterday I ate an entire cauliflower by myself— and I’m not even kidding At first I felt glutenous. I mean, who does that?  I blamed my indulgence on shrinkage (those flowerettes shrivel to nothing when you stick them in the oven for 40 minutes) but I then I realised I was only making excuses. I ate it all because I wanted to. It tasted good, so I ate it. To HELL with the cauliflower police! Even so, my lingering doubts and insecurities  made me check with my friend Google. She usually gives good advice. AND GUESS WHAT??  She tells me to totally have another. Turns out AN ENTIRE…
  • A Man and His Cape
    22 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    Spoiler Alert: This post has nothing to do with food and everything to do with lust. My youngest daughter, Leah, suggested I make my blog posts more “edgy” in order to achieve world domination in “blog land.” Apparently, sex sells. Who knew? I considered blogging about the booty craze, but since there’re only so many things you can say about Kim Kardashian’s ass, or anyone’s ass, for that matter, I decided to focus on something that’s actually crazy, sexy, hot—the cape—for men. I’m not taking about some metro-sexual, silky, Dracula…
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    funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way

  • This Cute Baby Monkey Is Playing With A Bunch Of Newborn Puppies

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:10 pm
    This video is extremely cute and may cause heartmelting! Watch with caution! This is so adorable and funny, this baby monkey is playing with a bunch of little puppies! Cute Baby Monkey Playing With PuppiesThe post This Cute Baby Monkey Is Playing With A Bunch Of Newborn Puppies appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • This Japanese Prank Is Very Funny And Will Surely Give You A Laughing Start For This Week

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    This is what we need to start a good week! A good laugh and a joyous smile! Watching this japanese prank will surely make your day better! Very Funny Japanese PrankThe post This Japanese Prank Is Very Funny And Will Surely Give You A Laughing Start For This Week appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • This Husky Is Very Funny When His Owner Yells At Him

    28 Mar 2015 | 11:10 pm
    So, this adorable and cute husky is very funny when you see his reaction after doing something bad and his owner yells at him! Just watch and see for yourself. Cute And Funny HuskyThe post This Husky Is Very Funny When His Owner Yells At Him appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • This Video Will Show You How Cool Those Cats Can Be

    28 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    You know you have a cool cat when you can brofist with him! Check out this video showing you different owners and cats that are brofisting! Brofist CatsThe post This Video Will Show You How Cool Those Cats Can Be appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • Top 10 Worst Life Hacks You Should Not Do

    28 Mar 2015 | 12:10 am
    Life hacks are pretty amazing and can be of great help! But some of them are really funny and bad. Take a look here and remember what not to do when you are practicing life hacks.The Worst Life Hacks The post Top 10 Worst Life Hacks You Should Not Do appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
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  • This Gamer Got REALLY Mad With His Optimus Prime Toy

    Amazingator Staff
    14 Mar 2015 | 9:35 pm
    YouTube is full of game “review” videos. This gamer got just a bit TOO angry with his $500-worth Transformers toy of a G1 Optimus Prime. Want More? Give us your E-mail! Please! Subscribe The post This Gamer Got REALLY Mad With His Optimus Prime Toy appeared first on Amazingator.
  • Cat’s Tongue Caught on Camera For The First Time in History

    Amazingator Staff
    14 Mar 2015 | 3:13 am
    All cat owners know that our feline friends’ tongues are areas shrouded in mystery. Over the centuries, many researchers have tried to capture these sneaky organs, first with paintings and later on with sophisticated camera equipment – to no avail. Until today. In a surprising turn of events, this cat’s tongue was actually photographed by its owner – and the internet is going berserk over it. Not to be confused with the famous dress, in this case there are no questions or debates – the world is indeed at an awe, looking at this exposed tongue. Pet expert Dr.
  • Quiz: Sex Toy or Apple Device?

    Amazingator Staff
    7 Mar 2015 | 3:24 am
    Share on FacebookShare on Twitter Apple products are sexy. Sex toys are also sexy. Can you tell them apart? 1. Sex Toy or Apple Device?(Click “See Answer” to see the original photo) Sex Toy Apple Device  Loading… 2. Sex Toy or Apple Device? Sex Toy Apple Device  Loading… 3. Sex Toy or Apple Device? Sex Toy Apple Device  Loading… 4. Sex Toy or Apple Device? Sex Toy Apple Device  Loading… 5. Sex Toy or Apple Device? Sex Toy Apple Device  Loading… 6. Sex Toy or Apple…
  • The Woman On The Left Made Us Laugh So Hard!

    Amazingator Staff
    2 Mar 2015 | 5:30 am
      Julie Mason came into our offices last Thursday, with the most incredible story – incredibly funny, that is. By the time she was done telling it, we were all practically on the floor, laughing so hard our eyes nearly popped out. Please share so everyone learns about this. Want More? Give us your E-mail! Please! Subscribe The post The Woman On The Left Made Us Laugh So Hard! appeared first on Amazingator.
  • Leaked Photos Suggest: House of Cards Season 3 To Star Kevin Spacey

    Amazingator Staff
    25 Feb 2015 | 6:42 am
    With season 3 of House of Cards almost upon us (February 27), leaked photos from the third season have now all but confirmed: Kevin Spacey is in it, probably in a starring role. House of Cards, developed by Beau Willimon, has been a phenomenal success for Netflix, with multiple Emmy and Golden Globe awards. While the source of this latest leak is unknown, sources close to Netflix have assured us that this is likely NOT an inside job. “House of Cards is tremendously important to us”, they said, “And we want everyone to enjoy it on the same day – February 27. If you…
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    Green Milk

  • Green Milk Is Time Out Comedy Critic’s Choice

    The Genius
    28 Mar 2015 | 6:17 am
    We done gone and done it, ain’t we!? Our next night showcasing the talents of Liam Williams has been made Time Out Comedy’s Critic’s Choice. Oooosh. Back of the net, etc..   We can’t say we’re too surprised… the line up is simply scintillating, with the erudite Yorkshireman supported by a cracking line up of special guests including Bobby Mair, Beth Vyse, Olaf Falafel and some surprise acts too!     A night that promises to be the best of the bunch in central London, we’re extremely proud to showcase some of the more alternative comics…
  • Ed Miliband Meets Drake

    The Genius
    16 Mar 2015 | 10:05 am
    Look into the shadowy eyes of this Aardman creation and tell us that you wouldn’t want him to be in control of this country’s education system and taxes and nuclear programme…   The post Ed Miliband Meets Drake appeared first on Green Milk.
  • Roar

    Gene Simmons
    16 Mar 2015 | 9:40 am
    Have you ever wondered what it would be like if you made a film with like 400 lions and tigers and just like punched them and rode a motorcycle around them a lot? Well wonder no longer, because they’ve made it…   Now, your next question might be, “why did they make this?” But that’s a ridiculous question because the answer is obviously, because it was hilarious.   The post Roar appeared first on Green Milk.
  • 13 Times Michael Keaton Was Thinking About Birds When He Should Have Been Doing Other Things

    Philip Likos
    24 Feb 2015 | 1:50 am
    Birdman? More like Birdfan. He just can't help himself. Whether it's over his morning coffee, or as he lies shivering in his girlfriend's sweet embrace, Michael Keaton simply can't stop thinking about birds.  Though not often caught on film, here we have 13 classic moments in which Micael Keaton was thinking about birds, when really he should have been doing something else. That time he was supposed to be thinking Bruce Wayne things, but was wondering why birds can't have the same rights as people instead.   That time he was supposed to be doing an interview, but instead remembered the…
  • 6 Things We Learnt From The Death Of Lucy Beale

    Philip Likos
    20 Feb 2015 | 2:46 am
    In what was perhaps the most thrilling piece of television to ever have happened in the whole Universe, last night saw the long awaited revelation of Lucy Beale’s killer. Akin to Darth revealing he’s Luke’s father and Bruce Willis being dead inside the whole time, you are probably still recovering from the biggest shock of you life. If you’re anything like me then your mind is awash with a whole heap of unanswered questions  – what was Bobby Beale holding? How could that tiny little orphan overpower a grown woman? Is this some practical joke for Comic Relief?
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    The People Pleaser

  • Vicariously Vivifying Violence through Victims of Vice and Vehemence

    The People Pleaser
    18 Mar 2015 | 2:05 pm
    I often feel a strange sense of excitement when reading about catastrophic events and always feel a sense of disappointment when they're over. An abhorrent thing, I know. But the feeling is there. If I read about a tsunami, plane crash, or some potential escalation in North Korea, I find that I'm hoping for it to blow out of proportion. It's not that I don't realise the reality of the situation, or the devastation it would cause to so many people. It's not that I think I will actually get any sort of enjoyment or happiness from it. I won't. There's just this ingrained desire for…
  • Money Money Money..... Money

    The People Pleaser
    10 Mar 2015 | 1:34 pm
    Money. It's a broad and sensitive topic. There are devoted lovers and haters of money and only a small number of those who are indifferent. The relative importance of money is something I continue to struggle with in my life. Balancing the pursuit of wealth with family life is a massive effort. This seems to have resulted in me living in the future more than the present. My wife accuses me of this frequently and although I vehemently deny it to her - it's true. The problem is that the future is uncertain, and with my pessimistic attitude, I tend to focus on the potential…
  • Hardly Homeless, However a Home Has not been Had

    The People Pleaser
    1 Mar 2015 | 12:10 pm
    How important is it to have a place to call home? Is a home more than just the people that occupy it? How much importance and real value can a physical location hold?These are questions I ask myself after speaking to people who have a place to call home - whether it be the house they grew up in, or just the town or city. They have one place that holds the vast majority of their memories, friends and family. Consequently, it also holds a great deal of importance to them and always offers a comforting feeling of familiarity and safety. I personally don't have this and this leads me to the…
  • Contemplating the Conceded yet Contented Countenances of Commuting Citizens

    The People Pleaser
    23 Feb 2015 | 1:11 pm
    I unfortunately spend a lot of time on public transport travelling to and from work. What I can't help but notice is the number of strange folk that occupy these moving sweat boxes every day. Don't get me wrong, not everyone is totally obscure. There are a few "normals" - students, people on their way to work, some travellers. But thrown into this mix are some really odd characters. I don't quite know what compels these strange people to populate every empty space in a train, tram, subway or bus. You would think they would just lock themselves up indoors - away from the cruel and…
  • Dissecting the Determinants of Self-Destructive Desires

    The People Pleaser
    13 Feb 2015 | 2:37 pm
    Today I'm considering the phenomenon of craving certain self-destructive behaviours and whether this is driven by an urge to indirectly harm one's self, or is driven by other urges that promote behaviours which happen to be self-destructive. In my last post, I commented briefly on masochistic behaviour and its relation to unnecessary suffering. Once again, here I'm talking about lesser forms of suffering. I'm not talking about real suffering, but first world issues that we create in lieu of real problems. This post is not meant to be a generalisation, but an analysis of a part of…
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    Bustle Feed

  • Like guys do

    29 Mar 2015 | 11:18 pm
    Source:: The post Like guys do appeared first on Bustle Feed.
  • Anime vs real world. Which one do you prefer?

    29 Mar 2015 | 3:18 pm
    Source:: The post Anime vs real world. Which one do you prefer? appeared first on Bustle Feed.
  • Direct translations from Chinese to English!

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:18 am
    Source:: The post Direct translations from Chinese to English! appeared first on Bustle Feed.
  • After you clear your browser history

    29 Mar 2015 | 3:18 am
    Source:: The post After you clear your browser history appeared first on Bustle Feed.
  • Awful news

    28 Mar 2015 | 11:18 pm
    Source:: The post Awful news appeared first on Bustle Feed.
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  • Time Flies! 18 Incredible Pictures Showing How A Flight Was 40 Years Ago

    Lauren Davidson
    29 Mar 2015 | 3:52 pm
    Yes, time flies! Imagine just how much has changed in 10 years, and how the world was in the 2000’s. Crazy, right? But, can you imagine what the world was like 40-50 years ago? Impossible. There have been countless changes made to our planet throughout these decades, especially where technology is concerned. We’ve gone from huge, heavy telephones to powerful, compact and modern smartphones. However, there is one thing that was 1000 times better in the past – flights. Of course, airplanes these days are much more safe, secure and modern, but back then, onboard a jet was a…
  • 18 Of The Smartest Product Packaging In The World Pt. II

    Lauren Davidson
    29 Mar 2015 | 4:52 am
    After we showed you here some of the smartest product packaging in the world, the time has come to bring you Part II of the most creative packaging that, without a doubt, has the power to make the products sell like hot cakes. We all know that our senses are very connected to our wills and needs, right? Thinking about this, some of the best marketing professionals in the world designed attractive packaging to make you fall in love with their products. Are you ready to check them out? Enjoy! #1 Interactive Teabags These teabags are inspired by some of the most well-known political…
  • These 30 Unlucky People Are Definitely Having A Worse Day Than You

    Lauren Davidson
    29 Mar 2015 | 3:14 am
    If this makes you feel any better, it’s important to know that you’re not the only one in the world who is having a pretty bad day. The unlucky fellas below that we’ve about to show you are definitely, 100%, in worse situations than you. So, if you’re looking for a way to improve your day, look no further, because now is your big chance to laugh a lot and forget your problems. We have made a special selection of some very unlucky people, all of whom are having a much worse day than you. Enjoy, and be happy! #1 What A Mess! #2 Just Try To Ignore It #3 No Happy Ending #4…
  • 32 Important Moments in History as Presented by Modern Media

    28 Mar 2015 | 8:01 pm
    We live in a time where things like tabloid journalism and sensationalism are on the rise. Instead of relying on legitimate and well-researched news like before, journalism nowadays focuses more on social media and eye-catchingly exaggerated headlines to sell the news. What happens though, if we take the biggest stories of the past and present them in a more modern and relevant kind of way? See for yourself as we take a look at some of the most important moments in history as presented by modern media. 1. Abraham Lincoln   2. The Great Smallpox Epidemic of 1775-82   3. Woodstock…
  • A Chubby Ginger Cat Is Invading Historical Art And Making It Awesome

    Lauren Davidson
    28 Mar 2015 | 2:15 pm
    Zarathustra is the strange name of this hilarious chubby cat who is changing the history of art by making it that little bit cuter. His owner, Svetlana Petrova, had the brilliant idea to create some hilarious compositions of her fat cat and famous paintings from the past, in an attempt to make art more accessible and ‘fun’. Here is a selection of the best pictures of lovely Zarathustra invading some famous masterpieces, and essentially making the history of art a lot more adorable. Enjoy! #1 The Birth Of A Fat Cat “The Birth of Venus” by Sandro Botticelli…
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    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions

  • Driving a Car is Very Similar to How You Live Your Life.

    29 Mar 2015 | 7:29 pm
    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions - Are you driving through life constantly using the brake? This might be from using too much acceleration. Do you find yourself in a car pushing the pedal to the medal, and then constantly applying pressure to the brakes? If this is something you can relate to, you may want to stop and think about your actions. Driving a car is very similar to how you live your life. If you are moving faster and faster every day, you will eventually burn out and need more sleep. If you are able to drive at a steady pace, you…
  • The Girl Next Door from France who Lives in South Beach

    27 Mar 2015 | 12:18 pm
    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions - I saw her, she was about 100 feet away; she was looking at me, and smiling. A sincere smile, you could tell, and she was attractive and slim. She had on a blue dress that clung hungrily to her form, a form with no excessive traits. Alluring and inviting without overtly saying so. Damn, I was staring at her. Did she notice? It didn’t seem to bother her! She was like the girl next door I never had when I was young and growing up. Here’s looking at you kid Back to work, the traffic is all around me…
  • 8 Reasons why you shouldn’t buy a home

    Viewer Submission
    25 Mar 2015 | 5:30 pm
    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions - So I have been married for a few years and now my parents are nagging me about buying a house. Oh you know first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage thats not all..blah blah blah. “The next step is to buy house.” I can hear my dad at our last chat on the phone. Honestly, what if buying a home isn’t for me. No it’s not that I don’t have any money. Money isn’t the problem. It just I have no desire to buy a house. And heres why you should not buy a home. Gypsy…
  • 5 Tummy Tuck Facts tо Know

    Viewer Submission
    23 Mar 2015 | 8:13 pm
    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions - Many Americans continuously struggle wіth losing weight аnd оn аnd оff dieting аnd exercise. Unfоrtunаtеlу, sоmеtіmеs а healthy diet аnd sоmе exercises aren’t јust еnоugh tо gіvе уоu thе flat аnd toned stomach уоu rеаllу wаnt. Еsресіаllу whеn уоu’vе аlrеаdу lost а big amount оf weight, іt саn bе difficult tо gеt thе toned аnd tight stomach уоu оnсе hаd. Ѕоmеtіmеs, а person’s skin јust wоn’t gо bасk tо thе…
  • Online Music | Why I love it!

    Viewer Submission
    21 Mar 2015 | 11:24 am
    Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions Funny Posts, Pictures, Articles, Opinions - Music іs thе mоst awesome source оf entertainment. Wіthоut music life wоuld bе dull аnd dry. Еvеrуbоdу loves tо listen tо music аnd sіnсе ages іt hаs bееn thе mоst integral раrt оf оur lives. Оvеr thе years, dіffеrеnt styles аnd kinds оf music hаvе evolved. Ноwеvеr, thе real essence оf music іs tо provide rejuvenation аnd joy. Іt hаs thе ability tо soothe аnd calm оur minds. Іt іs рrоbаblу thе best wау tо soothe оur senses аnd relish life.
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    Good April Fools Pranks

  • Office April Fool Pranks To Play With Colleagues

    Lakshaya Singh
    19 Mar 2015 | 12:16 pm
    Office April Fool Pranks, April Fool Pranks for Office, Office Pranks on April Fool : For the jokesters of the world, April Fools’ is the favourite holiday, especially if the target of a prank isn’t expecting it. Many typical gags involve monkey-wrenching morning rituals by super gluing the shampoo top or adding food colouring to toothbrushes, but technology lets unsuspecting victims to be tricked in a new way, by SMS. Here we are sharing some Office April Fool Pranks to share with your friends and make fool of them. Office April Fool Pranks Office April Fool Pranks So, keep reading…
  • April Fool Pranks for Friends On April Fools Day

    Lakshaya Singh
    19 Mar 2015 | 11:52 am
    Good April Fools Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Pranks 2015, April Fools Day Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Jokes : Here we are sharing with our friends and all our dear readers, these hilariously funny April Fool Pranks for Friends, which will make you laugh out loud and you might just roll on the floor laughing as well, when you play these pranks on your friends. We hope these help you to have true fun. Enjoy reading below. April Fool Pranks for Friends So, here on this page of our site, we are sharing some of the most hilariously funny April Fool Pranks for Friends, you can simply read…
  • April Fool Pranks for School | School Pranks For 1st April

    Lakshaya Singh
    18 Mar 2015 | 9:13 am
    Good April Fools Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Pranks 2015, April Fools Day Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Jokes April Fool Pranks for School Kids and for being implemented at schools are being shared on this page of our site. We are here supporting the April Fools Day, and giving the school children an opportunity to crack some really funny jokes and pranks on their friends this April Fools Day. April Fool Pranks for School So, keep reading and stay tuned to this page of our site, as we are here sharing some of the best April Fool Pranks for School. We hope you like these pranks and being…
  • Best April Fools Jokes Messages, SMS

    Shobhit Pandey
    18 Mar 2015 | 8:43 am
    Good April Fools Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Pranks 2015, April Fools Day Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Jokes 2015 :  April Fools Day is just around the corner so here we brought you some of the best April Fools Jokes and pranks to get you in the holiday spirit. Best April fools jokes Best April Fools Jokes April Fools Day is one of the best holidays. You get to play nasty pranks and practical jokes on people – and get away with it!  Here we have put together some safe but fun April Fools’ jokes you can pull on your friends and family. Cheese is Cheese Butter is butter if…
  • Good April Fools Jokes For Kids | 1st April Jokes

    Shobhit Pandey
    17 Mar 2015 | 10:13 pm
    Good April Fools Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Pranks 2015, April Fools Day Pranks 2015, Best April Fools Jokes : For the jokesters of the world, April Fools’ Day is the favorite holiday, especially if the target of a prank isn’t expecting it. Many typical gags involve monkey-wrenching morning rituals by supergluing the shampoo top or adding food coloring to toothbrushes, but technology lets unsuspecting victims to be tricked in a new way, by SMS. Here we are sharing some Good April Fools Jokes to share with your friends and make fool of them. Good April Fools Jokes For Kid Good Aprils…
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  • Severed Hand Found At A Crosswalk

    Tanya Pshenychny
    26 Mar 2015 | 4:19 am
    NEW YORK—A body part was caught red-handed last night, as it was fingertipping through a crosswalk at a red light. This light was also a pedestrian signal for the hand, meaning that it was the hand’s turn to cross the street. This particular hand is believed to be Thing, who has been known to wander out of The Addams Family home for years. Thing has traveled around several countries enough times for these customized hand signals to start appearing at crosswalks worldwide. Although there have been several reports of sightings of Thing in the past, this is the only image of it in…
  • One Squirrel’s Fight Against Diabeetus

    Tanya Pshenychny
    19 Mar 2015 | 4:32 am
    This young, hardworking squirrel is named Bear. He lives in Milwaukee and has been diagnosed with The Squirrel Diabeetus. But his battle with this disease has been silent because Bear doesn’t have things that we humans tend to take for granted, like being able to afford the internet, and the ability to speak English. It wasn’t until his good friend Nate St Pierre, a human who has the internet and who is fluent in Squirrel, helped me get in contact with Bear via email to share Bear’s story. IllustrArticles: Hi Bear, tell everyone about yourself. Bear: I just…
  • Testing The New MacBook: It’s Pretty Fly

    Tanya Pshenychny
    12 Mar 2015 | 6:27 am
    Thanks to my secret connections via IllustrArticles, I got my hands on the brand new MacBook, designed by Apple, before anyone else. At just 13.1mm thickness and 2 lbs weight, the MacBook is the thinnest and lightest laptop ever, and beyond portable. Its Intel Core M 1.3 GHz processor uses far less power than other laptops, because it runs partially on wind power. This machine wasn’t designed to run heavy applications. This machine was designed to fly. The gold and silver MacBooks are made entirely of gold and silver metals, so they’re worth much more in resale value than other…
  • A Sext From Your Phone

    Tanya Pshenychny
    13 Feb 2015 | 4:15 am
    Dear You, I had a really nice time last night. Just wanted to let you know that, in case you couldn’t tell even though it’s written all over my face. I could tell you were interested in me way more than that conversation at dinner with your date because you kept checking me out and picking me up. You just couldn’t keep your eyes and hands off of me! Three’s a crowd but two is company, and I’m glad that “date” finally took the hint and left so that there were just the two of us, because I truly less-than-three you. At the end of the night, it was great when we…
  • You Are Watching The Super Owl

    Tanya Pshenychny
    1 Feb 2015 | 2:56 pm
    Congratulations, you are currently watching the super owl. There it is up there. Isn’t it cute? Go on, say hi! It doesn’t do much. It doesn’t have to. It just kind of looks at you inquisitively, as if it’s curious because it has the reputation of being smart. Don’t fall for that, though. It’s actually pretty stupid. Owls can’t even talk. Super owl’s super power is appearing to be very intelligent while listening to you talk even though it has no idea what the hell you’re saying.
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