• Most Topular Stories

  • 4 Unpleasant Things Nobody Tells You About Being in Love

    Cracked: All Posts
    5 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    By Felix Clay  Published: March 05th, 2015 
  • 14 Ordinary People Who Just Ran Out of F#@ks to Give

    Cracked: All Posts
    5 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    By CRACKED Readers  Published: March 05th, 2015 
  • Are you beer-ing impaired?
    19 Feb 2015 | 5:09 pm
    Spotted by our submitter at his local pub in Australia. (The wheelchair-accessible toilet is about 5 feet closer to the bar.) related: Going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras? 
  • No. No. Nope. ALL THE NOPES.

    The Bloggess
    5 Mar 2015 | 9:08 am
    If you’ve been here long enough you know I have a terrific fear of anything tentacled, and that I’m fairly certain giant squids will one day take over the world. This isn’t helping: We’re not even safe on land, you guys.  I don’t even trust the toilet anymore at this point.
  • 6 Questions You Should Never Ask Your IT Guy

    23 Feb 2015 | 8:12 pm
    Sure, the IT guy (or gal) is not always the friendliest of the bunch.  But let's not make their job harder than it needs to be. Right?  Right...      1.) How do I turn this thing on?   Source   Take a few deep breaths and think this one out a little before making that call to the IT Department. Oh yea, you're pressing the button to turn on the monitor...not the computer.      2.) What's my password?    Source     Unless this is your very first time logging in, they won't know your password.
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    The Bloggess

  • No. No. Nope. ALL THE NOPES.

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:08 am
    If you’ve been here long enough you know I have a terrific fear of anything tentacled, and that I’m fairly certain giant squids will one day take over the world. This isn’t helping: We’re not even safe on land, you guys.  I don’t even trust the toilet anymore at this point.
  • When did Science turn into an accessory?

    4 Mar 2015 | 7:31 am
    1.  Whose idea was it to schedule school picture day on the same day that Science Project Hats are due? 2.  When did we stop making science projects, and instead make science projects that have to be worn on a hat?  Is this just a Texas thing? 3.  FYI…Science projects don’t balance well on hats because hats are round.  (THAT’S SCIENCE.)  So now you have to make a working solar system and also balance it on a round, moving, hyper child. 4.   Hailey couldn’t get her project to balance on a baseball cap (An electrical current she made that lights up and makes…
  • My dog is an internet icon.

    3 Mar 2015 | 7:38 am
    We’ve had Dorothy Barker for a month and I’ve been trying to teach her some tricks, like “not running around like a maniac at 3am” and “the rug is not a toilet” but she’s having none of it.  I tried fetch and she brought back the ball once and then after that she was like “You know what?  No.  I just brought it back to you and you immediately lost it.  How are you going to learn if I keep doing this for you?”  Then I explained that it was a game and she looked at me like “I’m a dog.  I don’t speak english.  What…
  • Facebook is evil. Or I am. One of those.

    1 Mar 2015 | 8:59 am
    Sometimes I want to write something innocuous on Facebook like “Puppy kisses are awesome!” so hundreds of people will click the “like” button, but then go back in and edit that post to say something like “I just made a blanket out of skinned kittens”.  And then I’d go into the comments and be like “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?  WHY WOULD YOU LIKE THIS?  This was a test and you failed.  Stop skinning kittens.” And then I’d write a new Facebook status saying that to clear my head I’d just made a bacon-wrapped mac &…
  • Let me be frank.

    27 Feb 2015 | 8:59 am
    This week I spoke at frank in Florida and it was lovely.  Click here to see the glorious magnificence of my hotel room.  I highly recommend checking out all of the speeches but if you have 30 minutes and want to see mine you can check it out here.  You have to fast-forward to the end to see it.  It’s at the 1 hour 14 minute mark. PS. I corrected Matt who credited @crappytaxidermy but it actually was @craptaxidermy so ignore me.  And I’m sure I fucked up other stuff too.  The usual. PPS.  Unrelated, but this dress debate is killing me.  You’ve seen this, right? I…
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    Damn You Auto Correct!

  • Mooooo!

    5 Mar 2015 | 5:00 pm
      Submitted by Whit The post Mooooo! appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • Don’t Be Snotty

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:00 pm
      Submitted by Brandy The post Don’t Be Snotty appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • A Mechanic’s Lunch

    5 Mar 2015 | 1:00 pm
      Submitted by Christi The post A Mechanic’s Lunch appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • What a Deal!

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:00 am
      Submitted by B The post What a Deal! appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
  • Who’s Linda?

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:00 am
      Submitted by Robert Typo to my wife The post Who’s Linda? appeared first on Damn You Auto Correct!.
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  • A Field Guide to Women of North America, According to the Lyrics of Rock Songs Written by Men by Joyce Millman

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    Kansas CityCharacteristics of local species: Mentally unbalanced, diminutive. Particularly active on the corner of 12th Street and Vine. Lure by filling feeders with Kansas City wine.MemphisConservationists report a barroom queen (Honkus tonkus femina) was found soaked in gin. State environmental officials traced the distilled spirit spill to a leaking party bus used to transport British rock bands on wildlife tours of the South.San Berdoo to KalamazooAll the good women are gone. Bad women remain plentiful in the region.Winslow, ArizonaSpotted: A girl (Femina flatbed Ford) engaged in an…
  • The Hidden Rich: The Imbecile’s Dictionary: Investing from A-Z by Jane Dough

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    COMMERCEn. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E. — Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary- - -AGENT-PRINCIPAL RELATIONSHIPAn arrangement in which one entity appoints another to act on its behalf. In finance, an advisor or money manager acts as the investor’s agent. Other examples: doctor-patient and lawyer-client. On occasion, a person may act as both agent and principal.1AGENT-PRINCIPAL PROBLEMConflict of interest common in hedge funds and other alternative investments where…
  • List: True Designer Baby Names by Marco Kaye

    6 Mar 2015 | 3:59 am
    For GirlsAsciiBellybandCollateEm-DashLigatureLoremMarginMoiréOpacityPatinaVellum- -For BoysAscenderBaskervilleBézierCropGifIpsumKernPicaSerifVectorWacomZapf
  • Let’s Tidy Up This Sex Dungeon! by Teddy Wayne

    5 Mar 2015 | 4:02 am
    Well, folks, that was one terrific sadomasochistic orgy. Looked like everyone—doms, subs, switches—was really experiencing the heights of erotic ecstasy through the lens of control and degradation. Now, if we all cooperate, it won’t take too long to tidy up this sex dungeon.I’m going to throw out the whole master-slave binary, if that’s okay with you; it’ll make things go faster if we’re all on the same page rather than having half of you delegate cleaning orders while lashing and humiliating the others.Grab a roll of paper towels from Janice here, but dip it in one of the…
  • List: Headlines From My Dismal Lifestyle Blog by Eileen Consedine

    5 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
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    ABlog the Author

  • Trenchant and substantial post to follow, but in the meantime....THE TRUANTS GOT A FESTIVAL!!!!!

    27 Feb 2015 | 8:55 am
    That’s right, the boys will be performing at MUZIKFEST in Bethlehem, Pa., a thoroughly legit, 13-stage, week-long deal. Saturday, August 15, 2:30-4:30. Two hours of British Invasion, which we have in our back pocket. I am over the friggin moon. The only way we can get more work is to have more people see us. I think this will be something. 
  • Please indulge me. I had to, I just had to.... At last, a FULL set video!

    24 Feb 2015 | 6:04 pm
  • Video

    24 Feb 2015 | 6:03 pm
  • So, I stopped by the v-underrated comic Ross Bennett's 60th birthday party at the Friars tonight....

    23 Feb 2015 | 7:24 pm
    Besides the unheard of combination of funny, nice and humble, Ross is responsible for the oldest known photograph of Adrianne and me (Houston, December 1983)…. …but that’s not why you’re here. This is the point. A guy comes up to me, comic who I’ve never met. Introduces himself as Andy and says, “I’ve seen you a lot at Letterman but I never wanted to bother you.” I thanked him. He went on, “but I have a story I was always dying to tell you. Years ago, I was working on the road. I was MCing and opening for this conservative comic. A real…
  • Not that you asked, but here are the set lists....

    21 Feb 2015 | 6:42 pm
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    Predator Press

  • Knox

    Michael Wolfe
    10 Feb 2015 | 3:58 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press First I need to apologize to Stephanie Barr, who actually commented on the post "Sisyphus" --a post I promptly deleted. Long story short, about ten days ago I heard from my dad for the first time in a decade, and by osmosis got some contact from other lost relatives and siblings. I've sort of inferred dad's health is in decline, but I'm not sure anybody was aware of the fact that dad found me. What ensued became quickly toxic, as I was accused of conveniently showing up by people already dividing his estate. Worse, most of this was spilling out on my Facebook account. I…
  • TurtleGate

    Michael Wolfe
    25 Jan 2015 | 4:51 am
    LOBO -Predator Press "Moriarty didn't commit suicide, you moron" Rachel explains.  "Morry is a tortoise.  Tortises live on land." "Well you're certainly not making me feel any better about this whole fiasco," I says, pushing on Morry's chest rhythmically.  "This is a consequence of God's spurious equivocation when it comes to Creation." "You're blaming God for drowning Morry?" "I mean it's not like we see fish walking around downtown," I says, slamming my fist into the inverted carapace.  "I figured this would be a major upgrade for him." Morry suddenly hacks, and ...
  • The Shart Begins

    Michael Wolfe
    4 Jan 2015 | 8:47 am
    LOBO -Predator Press "Why does Bruce Wayne keep all this cool Batman memorabilia down in this cave?" I ask.  "Won't it get moldy or something?" Stephanie Barr, at the Batputer, rolls her eyes.  Pulling up BatGoogle, she has Banksy's BatWikipedia profile in seconds.  "Why," she counters, "Are you so ardent about finding this artist?" "Bruce Wayne made me a cool costume," I says.  "It makes me look like I have pectorals." Nose-to-nose with an amazing Batsuit, I whistle involuntarily. "Man this Wayne guy must be the shit at Comic Con."

    Michael Wolfe
    3 Jan 2015 | 12:07 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press "I'm not exactly certain why I'm here," I admit to Mr. Wayne.  "Shit I didn't even know this room existed before now.  You Human Resources people really go 'all out.'" Wayne eyes me over a stack of documents.  "You and Lois Lane flew to Gotham last month as company representatives," he says. O shit. Wayne leans back in his chair.  "Would you care to explain to me what happened?" I pour a glass of water from the pitcher to give myself time to think carefully.  Living in quiet dread of this conversation, one might expect me…
  • Here Be Dragons

    Michael Wolfe
    28 Dec 2014 | 3:59 pm
    LOBO -Predator Press 'Carpenter Pants.' Ugh. -The modern, durable version of 80's 'Parachute Pants.'  Minus the teal, and presumably more flame-retardant. Presumably. "There are too many options and pockets," I explain.  "I don't even know where my penis is."
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    Funny or Die | Funny Videos, Funny Video Clips, Funny Pictures

  • Russell Westbrook Texts Kevin Durant True Identity Of Masked Thunder

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:08 pm
    Russell Westbrook Texts Kevin Durant ... For the past week, an Oklahoma City Thunder player wearing a face mask has been destroying the NBA. Thunder point guard Russell Westbrook recently unveiled the masked player's identity to teammate Kevin Durant via text. Submitted by: nfed Regular Keywords: oklahoma city thunder nba okc durant kevin russell westbrook text message funny haha laughs good times face mask dumb point guard mvp Views: 10,587
  • Hugh Jackman Loves Robots!

    5 Mar 2015 | 1:43 pm
    Hugh Jackman Loves Robots! 2:30 Hugh Jackman tries to resurrect his robot-boxing career with Chappie but finds out it won't be that easy. Submitted by: keganswyers Regular Keywords: robot hugh jackman chappie robots real steal mash-up supercut supercuts Views: 99
  • Get A White Castle Burger Named After You

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:43 am
    Get A White Castle Burger Named After... 2:26 Kal Penn and John Cho explain how YOU can get a White Castle named after long as your name isn't Hugh Mongus Johnson. Watch Night of Too Many Stars on Comedy Central, March 8th and help fund Autism programs. Submitted by: chris_singel Regular Keywords: Kal Penn John Cho white castle harold kumar notms night of too many stars comedy central john stewart Steve Carell Paul Rudd Louis C.K. Larry David John Oliver Amy Schumer Martin Short Larry Wilmore Sarah Silverman Bill Burr Steve Buscemi Andy Cohen Ilana Glazer Gilbert Gottfried Abbi…
  • Adam Sandler And Bob Barker Reunite For Night Of Too Many Stars

    Jenny Nelson
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:35 am
    Adam Sandler And Bob Barker Reunite F... The stars break out into another Happy Gilmore–style fight almost 20 years later. Submitted by: Jenny Nelson Regular Keywords: Bob Barker Adam Sandler Happy Gilmore Bob Barker Adam Sandler Bob Barker Happy Gilmore fight brawl Happy Gilmore fight scene the price is wrong bitch golf Night Of Too Many Stars Night of Too Many Stars Adam Sandler Bob Barker Views: 18,280
  • Highlights From Conan's Trip To Cuba

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:15 am
    Highlights From Conan's Trip To Cuba Conan Visits Cuba To Make Some Friends Submitted by: benwietmarschen Regular Keywords: Conan Cuba Conan in Cuba Team Coco Cuban Comedy Cuban Rum Havana Havana Cuba Downtown Havana Cuban Andy Conan Show Conan goes to Cuba Views: 2,337
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    vintage everyday

  • Eileen Percy on an Indian Motorcycle in an Ad for Fox Shoes, ca. 1920s

    John VE
    6 Mar 2015 | 2:02 am
    Photo by Charles Gates Sheldon
  • Kays Catalogue Menswear from 1977

    John VE
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:41 am
    Kay and Co Ltd was actually originally founded in Worcester in 1886 when William Kilbourne Kay started a jewellery and watch business with a local architect called George Jones. Four years later Kay struck out on his own and changed the name of the company to Kay’s of Worcester. But on 23 February 2007 their original depot in the town closed. Littlewoods and Kays combined to become Shop Direct which was based in Liverpool. The Kays brand was kept going until January 2011 and is now known as K. and co.See more »
  • Amazing Photographs of Harlem in the 1970s

    John VE
    5 Mar 2015 | 9:17 am
    Jack Garofolo (1923-2004) was a photographer for Paris Match magazine in the 1960’s and 70’s. During one trip to the United States in the summer of 1970, Garofalo captured these amazing photographs of Harlem and it’s residents, really exposing the feeling of the neighborhood. When he got back to Paris after spending 6 weeks here, the magazine placed his images on the cover of the October 1970 issue.See more »
  • Mannequins and Carousel, Paris, 1955

    John VE
    5 Mar 2015 | 7:08 am
    Photo by Adolfo Kaminsky.
  • Photos of Early Women Motorcycle Stunters

    John VE
    5 Mar 2015 | 4:42 am
    Back in the day, as they say, a woman riding a motorcycle was a pretty extraordinary thing. “Nice” girls weren’t known to ride motorcycles, which meant those women who chose to do so were branded as sort-of outlaws...Lillian La France was one of the first, and also one of the most popular, female Wall of Death riders of the 1920s & ’30s.Cookie Crum on the Wall of DeathCookie Crum riding side saddleLexington motorcycle Police stunt displaySee more »
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    15 Minute Lunch

  • Random Rants and Aerial Rectal Relief in 30 minutes or less.

    21 Feb 2015 | 1:21 pm
    This post? Completely random topics that I plan to write about as I think of them.  So to start, I'll have you all know that I'm a lottery winner.  I found a ten dollar bill in my jeans pocket when I put them on this morning, so on the way home from work I sprung for one of those ten dollar "$5000 a week for life" lottery tickets that only an insane person with more money than sense would ever buy.  But even though I knew my odds of winning were slightly worse than my odds of spending a night with a Victoria's Secret model who isn't printed on paper,  I walked into…
  • It's a Trap! Get an Axe.

    4 Feb 2015 | 5:44 pm
    Hello peoples of the Internet!  It's time for another edition of the old standby....Fantastic Searches That Somehow Pointed People To My SiteThis site doesn't get as much traffic as it used to, so some of these google search links are actually less fantastic and more obvious, but I liked them so I left them in. wool nipple warmers - My advice is that this is a bad idea. Because if you actually DO find wool nipple warmers, they will be rough and scratchy, and you will soon be looking for silk nipple warmers and a big tube of Benadryl for Nipples. And let me ask a serious question here,…
  • Raptor it up, I'll take it.

    23 Jan 2015 | 10:11 pm
    Man, I almost forgot the password to this dump. What have I been doing with my time, you ask? Well, I'll get to that.  So what's new with you? How've you been?  You look great!  Do people still read blogs?  Are blogs still a thing?  I'll have to Google it.This past weekend my wife and I spent her birthday in a little Inn in Vermont.  We were hoping for some snow, and our plans included lots of relaxing and maybe a sleigh ride at a local farm.   We did lots of relaxing, but it was mostly forced because the weather sucked. Instead of snow we got icy rain that…
  • You keep saying that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

    17 Jun 2014 | 6:52 pm
    Well, hello there. Is this place still open?I've been MIA lately, I know.   It seems the less I write, the less I feel like writing, so I have to do something about that, because I really do like writing.  So I have a story to tell you.  I spent $27,500 dollars about a month or so ago.  I would like to say I purchased a new car, or put an addition on my house or even spent it on hookers and blow, but no.  I spent it for a single night's accommodations in a drafty room in the city so a burly guy named Steve with a tattoo on his neck could offer me injectable drugs.
  • Henry's Door.

    21 Feb 2014 | 6:52 pm
    For those who don't know, I have a little short story out on Amazon right now.This is some quick background on it, written by my friend Mark, who happens to be a brilliant photographer.  He uses film and develops it himself and makes his own prints for god's sake.  Check out some of his stuff while you're over there.Tell him Johnny sent ya.Come visit me at
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    View from the Cloud

  • Chapter 4 - House Sitting 101

    16 Feb 2015 | 3:33 pm
    Charli and I get asked a lot of questions now that we are full time house sitters, such as...- What is house sitting?- How do you find houses to sit at?- Do you get paid?- Do you pay them? - Where can you do it? - Have you lost your minds?In this post I'll answer these questions and more!Let's start at the top...What is house sitting?In general, house sitting is a way for people to leave their house for an extended period of time while someone else stays there to take care of their pets and provide a "lived in" presence.  There are many aspects to a house sitting arrangement, but in our…
  • Chapter 3 - Beauty and the Beasts

    30 Jan 2015 | 6:48 pm
    I don't think there is a single definition of "house sitting" that describes all engagements, but based on what we've seen in the ads, 90% of them involve animals in one form or another... either pets, chickens, horses and yes, even ostriches.In the house we're at here in Connecticut, we have the pleasure of taking care of Mickey and Henry... two of the sweetest dogs we've ever met who LOVE to go for rides in the car and walks in the woods. AND, as if THEY aren't fun enough, we also have the pleasure of watching two adorable and VERY entertaining African grey parrots. Meet Tu-Tu and…
  • Chapter 2 - The Maiden Voyage

    18 Jan 2015 | 11:08 am
    In my last post I mentioned what inspired us to ditch everything we own and hit the road, besides the popular belief that we are experiencing a midlife crisis. Which we're not.  I think.But today I'm going to start by talking about one of the key things that is making this new lifestyle even possible for us... telecommuting.For most of the last decade my jobs have allowed me to work remotely from home, which is an amazing perk to have.  Except that it shouldn't be amazing!  It SHOULD be the norm, but that's a different topic for a different day.  The important thing is…
  • Chapter 1 - How We Sold Everything We Owned and Hit the Road

    8 Jan 2015 | 5:40 pm
    It all started back in March of 2013 when Charli and I decided to take a little 4000 mile road trip to see our kids... one in Phoenix and the other in Oceanside, CA. During this 2 week venture I was able to work in the passenger seat while Charli drove during the day, thanks to the magic of a wireless jetpack.It was this trip where we first learned that we really liked road tripping together and decided that doing it more often would be awesome. We even joked about just selling all our stuff and living on the road full time.  Ha ha ha.A few months later we ended up in Hawaii, house…
  • Yeah sure it'll fit

    10 Dec 2014 | 4:53 pm
    Aaaaand done!In my last post I noted that if we didn't sell our house by the time we left that we would need to try again in April. Well, as most of you know by now from Facebook, we DID sell our house!  So yay!Except yay?... we now have to completely empty our house and have it move in ready for the new owners before we leave on Dec 13?  Uh, sure... NO PROBLEM!But hey, we're doing it, and it's going fine so no worries. Although I'm pretty sure we underestimated the amount of things we were planning on carrying in the back of our car. For example...THIS luggage and THIS 88 note…
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    Awesomely Luvvie

  • Lupita, Shonda and the 2015 ESSENCE Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon

    1 Mar 2015 | 10:21 am
    My favorite event of the year is the ESSENCE Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon. I’ve gone three out of the last four years and there is no other space that feels as supportive, inspiring and epic as this one. There’s something incredibly special about how accessible the celebrities who come to it are. Everyone is like 5 tables away, including Oprah. Read my recap of the 2014 ESSENCE Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon. This year, though??? Listen. I’m still not fully recovered from all the amazingness that happened. My alphet. I had a spot on the red carpet right between…
  • About Patricia Arquette’s Backstage Speech at the 2015 Oscars

    23 Feb 2015 | 6:51 am
    I didn’t watch the 2015 Academy Awards so there’s no recap! And I’m kinda on the go but I saw a clip of Patricia Arquette’s speeches, both onstage and backstage. She should have quit while she was ahead because I’m here to talk about her comments in the press room. I woulda written a sternly-worded letter but I ain’t got time today so I ranted about it on Twitter and below are my quick thoughts. If you can’t view it here, check it out on Storify. “The truth is, even though we sort of feel like we have equal rights in America, right under the surface…
  • No More Blood: Scandal Episode 413 Recap

    20 Feb 2015 | 12:49 pm
    One of the reasons why I stan for Scandal and Shondaland is that their love of Greek Mythology shines through. As a longtime adorer of the shenanigans of them vintage days, I am giddy when I catch the obvious references. Of course we’ve had the Helen of Troy thing repeated over and over again, with Olivia and he “face that could launch 1,000 ships.” But in episode 13 of season 4, we got a taste of Icarus’ “be careful” lesson, and this will be the 2nd time. The first was in an episode of that name in season 2. Let’s talk about it, doe. Hood and Hoodwinked – Olivia is…
  • Tyler Perry Had a Christening For His Son and It Was Perfect

    18 Feb 2015 | 8:54 am
    Lemme tell you something. Flashy is in my blood. It is in my veins. I come from a family that thinks every occasion is a giant party. And not just 1 party, weekend-long ones. Don’t let us be getting married. NOBODY is sleeping for a whole week as we celebrate. I’m Nigerian and this is how we roll. We invented making it rain, dagnabbit. When my Grandmother turned 60 in 1991, we had a 3-day party where we shut down the 2 blocks around our family house and hired Nigeria’s PREMIER musician Ebenezer Obey to croon til 6am. We legit turned our neighborhood into a concert venue. For…
  • The Time Amber Rose Ethered Khloe Kardashian on Twitter

    16 Feb 2015 | 2:59 pm
    This whole thing started because Amber Rose went on a show and talked about how she is not feeling the idea of Tyga’s grown ass at 26 years old, dating Kylie Jenner, who just turned 17. It is ridiculous that it’s happening and Amber was right to call it out. In her initial interview, she didn’t even come for Kylie, really, besides calling her a baby. The person she directed most of her comments towards was Tyga’s overgrown ass. So Khloe Kardashian got on Twitter and had a few things to say to defend her sister. Amber, in response, came for her edges. Twitter continued…
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    Brittany, Herself.

  • Fat Girl Walking Cover Reveal & Pre-Order

    3 Mar 2015 | 5:37 am
    Pinch me. I knew this was coming, that everything was rolling forward, and yet… each new step leaves me so in shock I can’t breath.(...)Read the rest of Fat Girl Walking Cover Reveal & Pre-Order (169 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the author. Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh
  • A Whole Decade

    2 Mar 2015 | 7:11 am
    I’ve been married to Andy for 10 years. If there is anything I learned from last year, our anniversaries come and go here with little pomp and circumstance. And we like it that way, because we’re tired and always forget to grab cheesy cards from the grocery store the night before.(...)Read the rest of A Whole Decade (1,080 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the author. Feed enhanced by Better Feed from Ozh
  • The Internet is a Place. For Real.

    28 Jan 2015 | 7:11 am
    My friend Amy shared a video with me this morning about a boy named Josh who was previously bullied after losing his dad, but one day decided to open doors for people, and it changed his life. It was the typical tearjerker, emotional piano music in the background, only watch this shit on your period type of video. Don’t get me wrong, it was wonderful and totally affirming (you can watch it here), but I’m not really a touchy-feely kind of girl. I usually just smile, watch a few seconds and then click out before the waterworks start. But, about a minute into the video I was…
  • Old Hollywood Glamour

    22 Jan 2015 | 3:04 am
    If I could have one totally frivolous and useless goal in life, it would be to put myself in a position to sometimes wear formal wear. In theory. Because in theory wearing fancy gowns with sparkly bangles and gorgeous heels sounds like an absolute dream come true. In reality, Oh My God, why does all plus size formal wear make me feel like the mother of the bride? (...)Read the rest of Old Hollywood Glamour (512 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the…
  • 2015: The Game Plan

    13 Jan 2015 | 4:25 am
    I woke up the day after Christmas, briefly forgetting that it had happened. That is, until I walked into my living room to find crap everywhere, empty wine bottles from the previous night’s celebrations all over the counter, and I turned on the news to promises of weight loss and finally, finally, being a less suck ass version of yourself. Ahhh yes. It’s December 26th.(...)Read the rest of 2015: The Game Plan (1,246 words) © COPYRIGHT BRITTANY GIBBONS 2014 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written…
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    Boondock Ramblings

  • Efficient Ways on How to Get Instagram Followers

    5 Mar 2015 | 1:27 am
    These days, one of the most famous websites is the Instagram. This provide a lot of business owners the chance to increase their company. Usually, they get instagram followers first in order to maximize the site. Since it will take a while, many of them buy instagram followers as well as buy instagram likes. Companies that would like to buy real instagram followers and buy instagram likes don’t need to find it hard anymore. Aside from that, numerous techniques are accessible for those who wish to buy instagram followers cheap. Thus, one should be certain to buy real instagram followers…
  • Your Guide In Seeking Good quality Promotional Branded Water

    23 Feb 2015 | 11:56 pm
    The ongoing modernization of the world made several people search for new and exciting things. One of the products that are surfacing in the industry is the promotional branded water which is provided by many manufacturing companies today. The product’s distinctiveness is the reason why manufacturers of custom-made bottled waters are in demand. Their services are satisfaction-guaranteed, realizing that they will let you personalize the design and form of your bottle based on your preference. The benefit of acquiring this sort of product as a consumer is that you can name your bottled water…
  • Is It Truly Useful to Work with Commercial Plumbing Notthingham?

    19 Feb 2015 | 2:54 am
    Are you worried for having several problems along with your boilers and water system at home? Fret no more given that commercial plumbing Nottingham professionals are here to assist you. Plumbering Nottingham can make sure you the success of repair due to the experienced and trained workers they hire. They’ll never cause dismay when it comes to work performance . They’re capable enough in offering boiler service. In case you experience boiler troubles, you could call a boiler service Nottingham directly, and also Plumber Nottingham will do the restoration. It will be really useful…
  • The Quick and Safe Non-Surgical Nose Job

    19 Feb 2015 | 1:32 am
    Do you feel any problem whileinhaling and exhaling? Are you shy and uncomfortable enough with your nose? If yes, then doing something to remove this concern is very important. If you are truly keen to have an excellent nose, non-surgical rhinoplasty could help you. Taking risk in a non-surgical nose job is quite serious. It is done under a complex surgical procedure, so if the surgeon isn’t experienced, the patient’s life will be affected. That is why individuals must consider researching first before undergoing the surgery. Remember that it has a great possibility that the result is…
  • Looking for Companies of Good quality Corporate Video Production Services

    18 Feb 2015 | 2:19 am
    Nowadays, it’s already easy to find corporate video production services as a lot of commercial film company are now available. However, some of these firms are not able to provide the right materials you’ll need. Folks have many reasons why they acquire video productions. One of the key reasons for video production is for business marketing methods. This is why countless business entities search for the services of an excellent commercial film company. There are reliable video production companies you can find and clients need to know some vital factors prior to seeking one.
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    mark a rayner

  • It’s morning in the Singularity

    Mark A. Rayner
    20 Feb 2015 | 4:02 am
    Bob was not a happy cyborg. He’d had to skip is plasma bath and neural detox that morning because his dick of a boss, a narcissistic self-sustaining photosynthetic artificial intelligence named TODD-bot, needed him to come to work early. And he was late. (Clearly his autonomic clock was in need of some debugging.) But the […]
  • La dolce vita

    Mark A. Rayner
    18 Feb 2015 | 4:32 am
    It wasn’t always so easy. There used to be an anger in him. An emptiness that nothing could fill … nothing material anyway. He fell through time and space, and into a kind of dream. And it seemed as though an age passed him by, the stars streaming through the sky as though he watched […]
  • Ask General Kang: When is it okay to call someone to a Nazi?

    Mark A. Rayner
    16 Feb 2015 | 5:29 am
    I suppose it’s not a problem if the person is a Nazi, but I can’t think of a lot of other circumstances where it would be helpful. Presumably, you’re doing so to damage their reputation in some way, but consider this: if the person is a Nazi, either because they are still somehow a card-carrying […]
  • Clown Apocalypse

    Mark A. Rayner
    6 Feb 2015 | 1:40 pm
    Years later, the survivors discovered the Bozo Virus got its start at Escola de Clown de Girona, near the end of semester. The “Esclowna” was a kind of university/prep school for the international clowning set. The buffoons-in-training lived in common dorm rooms, and shared everything, so the virus spread easily within the school. There it […]
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  • Shedding Light On Insomnia (Limerick)

    5 Mar 2015 | 1:25 pm
    Shedding Light On Insomnia (Limerick) By Madeleine Begun Kane The cause of insomnia nightly Is my habit of growing more sprightly When the day fades to night. Seems I find no delight In the light, but in darkness burn brightly.
  • How NOT To Butter Up Your Waiter (Limerick)

    25 Feb 2015 | 12:18 pm
    How NOT To Butter Up Your Waiter (Limerick) By Madeleine Begun Kane When given some butter — a dollop, She said “More, and don’t loll! Hurry! Lollop!” On the waiter’s return With a butter-filled urn, She threw the urn, earning a wallop.
  • The Almost Naked Truth

    24 Feb 2015 | 12:26 pm
    I love this headline: “Mother, 29, who ran through hotel naked ‘after her friend stole her pants’ is slapped with an obscenity charge.” Not only did it make me laugh, but it reminded me of my own personal experience, memorialized in this humor column I wrote way back in the Twentieth Century: A Traveler’s Net Woes By Madeleine Begun Kane If your husband ever invites you to join him on a business trip, be sure to ask him these questions: 1. Will you ever get to see him while he is not — technically — asleep? 2. What will he do, if you accidentally lock…
  • The Revealing Oscars

    23 Feb 2015 | 12:51 pm
    The Revealing Oscars By Madeleine Begun Kane The Oscars have aired With winners declared, While folks mostly stared At the skin that was bared.
  • UPDATE: This Limerick-Off will continue for a second week and run through March 7th. Why? Blame Time Warner’s outage in my neighborhood, from which I’m now recovering. Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: EMOTE or REMOTE or MOAT at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

    21 Feb 2015 | 7:18 pm
    It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using EMOTE or REMOTE or MOAT at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.) The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.) How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy…
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    Dilbert Daily Strip

  • Comic for March 06, 2015

    6 Mar 2015 | 3:59 pm
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  • Comic for March 05, 2015

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:59 pm
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  • Comic for March 04, 2015

    4 Mar 2015 | 3:59 pm
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  • Comic for March 03, 2015

    3 Mar 2015 | 3:59 pm
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  • Comic for March 02, 2015

    2 Mar 2015 | 3:59 pm
    Dilbert readers - Please visit to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to
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    CAP News

  • Over 100,000 New Year's Resolutions Broken This Week

    5 Mar 2015 | 4:42 am
    BOSTON (CAP) - Hundreds of thousands of New Year's resolutions were broken this week as trial gym memberships expired and were not renewed. Exit polls conducted by CAP News found that many have lined up other plans for the spring. "I am totally going to walk every night after dinner, and maybe even get myself in shape for one of those 4K races," said Boston resident and former Planet Fitness member Barry LaCroix. "I mean, there's way too much snow on the ground now, but once it melts I'll be out there every day." A large number of people who had purchased year-long gym memberships have also…
  • Spelling Bees To Start Allowing Misspelled Words

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:28 am
    WASHINGTON (CAP) - The Scripps Howard Spelling Bee, in response to complaints about pressure on young participants, has announced it will start allowing students to misspell words in the competition beginning next year. "We've had many complaints from parents and psychologists who say being ejected from a spelling bee can be a traumatic experience for a child," said Bee Chairwoman Sally Fredericks, noting that the organization received a petition with more than 50,000 signatures from the American Parents United Against Competition (APUAC). "It does horrible things to children's self-esteem…
  • ISIS Draws Beards, Mustaches On American Currency

    3 Mar 2015 | 4:54 am
    MOSUL (CAP) - A new series of videos has surfaced online showing members of the terror group ISIS scribbling facial hair on various denominations of U.S. paper currency. The White House called it "a heinous act" that will not go unpunished. "We have stood idly by while they have committed untold atrocities, but this - this will not be tolerated," said President Obama. "We will ask them to stop and if they don't, we will ask them again, but more firmly." This news comes on the heels of a video showing ISIS members destroying timeless artifacts and yelling in Arabic that "smashing things is…
  • Employers Back Merit Based Contraception Coverage

    2 Mar 2015 | 4:37 am
    WASHINGTON (CAP) - A new law which permits employers to withhold contraception coverage based on worker performance has been embraced by a majority of companies. "Our receptionist occasionally arrives to work five or ten minutes late," said Mike Walsh, CEO of a Virginia law firm that is in favor of the legislation. "We're pretty sure it's because she's out partying until all hours, screwing everyone in sight to take advantage of our endless supply of birth control. "Well, maybe she'll think twice about it now that we can take it away," Walsh added as he chomped on a cigar. "You want your…
  • Massachusetts Issues Lizza D Warning

    18 Feb 2015 | 4:51 am
    BOSTON (CAP) - The state of Massachusetts has issued a Lizza D warning to motorists, urging those who travel the Commonwealth's roadways to take extra precaution as necessary. Many say they will take heed. "I saw the sign as I drove onto the Expressway, and I immediately locked all the doors," said Quincy resident Mickey Silverman. "Then I called my wife and had her draw all the shades in the house. Can't be too safe." State police say they are prepared and have ramped up safety measures, including arming all officers with beanbag shooters and tear gas. Official say it's tough facing an…
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  • Well, that’s legitimately creepy.

    3 Mar 2015 | 7:25 am
    I don’t typically like to post notes submitted by the person who left them, but I made an exception for this note by Geoff in New Zealand. Writes Geoff:  ”Someone actually threw out my lunch (still in its container) within an hour of putting it in the fridge at work. It was a really nice lunch., too. I thought someone had stolen it, then, for some reason I looked in the garbage can…it was covered in coffee grounds and snotty looking tissues. I was mad. Next day I brought lunch again. I wanted to be sure no one would even think of doing it again so I wrote the note, photographed…
  • Parking spots in Boston? It’s snow joking matter.

    24 Feb 2015 | 9:12 am
    This year, one Boston neighborhood tried to ban the time-honored practice of using space-savers to reserve a parking spot after shoveling it. But old habits die hard…and somewhat violently. When it comes to space-saving, says our submitter from Boston, “I get it. I respect it!” But after two of her own “space savers” were stolen, she figured the rules were off. One night, she says, “As I was looking for open parking , I pulled into an unclaimed space, thinking, what luck! No chair in sight!” Too good to be true, it turns out. When she returned to her…
  • Are you beer-ing impaired?

    19 Feb 2015 | 5:09 pm
    Spotted by our submitter at his local pub in Australia. (The wheelchair-accessible toilet is about 5 feet closer to the bar.) related: Going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras? 
  • My Pity Valentine

    15 Feb 2015 | 2:00 pm
    Our submitter from Maryland received this Valentine from his daughter, who has clearly not hit her teenage years yet. related: This Valentine’s, give the gift of honesty
  • Some office fridge requests

    12 Feb 2015 | 6:31 am
    (via reddit) related: Do you pocket like it’s hot?
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  • High School Hockey Player Reveals Spectacular Hair In Dramatic Shampoo Commercial Fashion

    Kyle Koster
    6 Mar 2015 | 4:37 am
    Here’s a little unsolicited tip for the younger Bros out there. Enjoy your flowing head of hair while you can because male-pattern baldness can strike even the swaggiest of men. Luke Seper, a high school hockey player from Minnesota, is certainly getting the best of his locks right now. How do I know this? Well, check out what he did while being introduced at a state playoff game yesterday. Oh yeah, Bro. We feel ya. If the hockey thing doesn’t work out, you can rest assured Seper has a bright future in hair care product commercials. That type of enthusiasm doesn’t just grow…
  • The Most Fired Up Chicago Bulls Fan Ever AGGRESSIVELY Butt-Slapped Joakim Noah For His Defensive Prowess

    Chris Wedge
    5 Mar 2015 | 9:08 pm
    Screenshot Chicago Bulls center Joakim Noah is one of the best defenders in the NBA — in fact, last season he was honored as the NBA’s best defender with the Defensive Player of the Year award. Tonight against Oklahoma City, his defensive prowess was on display as usual, particularly in the game’s final seconds. Immediately after teammate E’Twaun Moore hit a ridiculous three to put Chicago on top, Noah forced the Thunder’s Russell Westbrook out of bounds for a turnover, clinching the win for the Bulls. Naturally, Noah was fired up, but not nearly as much as one…
  • Shaq Hijacked Kenny Smith’s 50th Birthday Mobility Scooter And Took It For A Spin On TNT

    Chris Wedge
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:38 pm
    Screenshot In only three days (March 8th), Inside the NBA analyst and basketball legend Kenny Smith will turn 50 years old. Of course, his coworkers got him a “special” birthday gift to give him on-air and it didn’t disappoint — Smith received a mobility scooter. You know, because he’s old. Smith didn’t really get to ride it much right away though, because Shaq hijacked it for a spin around the studio: He flew it like Superman: …and took Ernie Johnson for a ride as well: h/t SB Nation and The Cauldron
  • The Furious 7 Extended Look Just Aired And It Is As Insane As You’d Hope

    David Covucci
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:31 pm
    Just now, on USA, the Furious 7 extended look aired. The preview for the film, also know as the Movie Event of the Century; also know as Furious 7: Rest in Peace, Paul Walker, Vengeance Hits Home I Don’t Have Friends, I Got Family is as ridiculous as you’d expect. Well, what are you waiting for? Press play on the Furious 7 extended look, dude. It’s as good a Furious 7 preview as you are gonna get. The movie comes out in theaters April 3. [H/T @DouglasStuff]
  • Bulls E’Twaun Moore Hits Game-Winning 3-Pointer Against Thunder

    Jorge Alonso
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:14 pm
    Chicago Bulls guard E’Twaun Moore had one of those games on Thursday night against the Oklahoma City Thunder. Moore not only went 9-of-10 from the field, he also hit the game-winning three-pointer to edge out the Oklahoma City Thunder. Moore ended up finishing with 19 points, four rebounds and two steals off the bench in the win.
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    Magick Sandwich

  • Vagina Repo: Gwyneth Edition

    8 Feb 2015 | 11:25 am
    The real golden ticket here is the Mugworth V-Steam; You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al. It is an energetic release—not just a steam douche—that balances female hormone levels. If you’re in LA, you have to do it.                                                                                    …
  • Googling Beckett

    11 Jan 2015 | 1:00 pm
    Sometimes a random typing error can make my whole day.I meant to enter the snippet of text I can't go on, I'll go on. How did poop become Google's (sole!) suggestion for the letter p? Did someone really search for this? If so, somewhere there is a constipated English major waiting for an answer that will never come. Which is so Beckett.
  • Gifts for Idiots

    18 Dec 2014 | 4:07 pm
    In the crush of holiday shopping, it's easy to forget to take time to thank the season's real innovators, those who work at the frontiers of imagination to add ever more useless crap to the world. This season, let's honor them with the ridicule they so richly deserve before consigning their wares to the landfill of memory.The Selfie Brush "makes your cellphone easy to hold for the best selfies ever"because what girl doesn't want to turn her iPhone into a cheap plastic hairbrush?The Theradome LH80 Pro laser helmet costs $895 and promises to slow hair loss. Though it admits new hair growth may…
  • Pink Ribbon Products: From Car Horns to Handguns

    26 Oct 2014 | 1:12 pm
    This is a bagel. What did you think it was?What would October be without a smorgasbord of pinktastic breast cancer awareness-themed treats from cookies, mints, hard lemonade, jelly beans, popcorn and  PEZ to ribbon-shaped cakes, chocolates, cupcake sprinkles, lollipops, pasta and bagels? Rarely has life-threatening illness tasted so delicious.Of course, we shouldn't forget the memorial offerings not meant to pass through the alimentary canal: perfume, knee socks, beer koozies, curling irons, chewing gum, flip flops, beach balls, tote bags, vegetable peelers, bathrobes, fishing rods,chip…
  • Magick Sandwich FAIL

    23 Jun 2014 | 1:23 pm
    Magick Sandwich has been on an unannounced (and unintended) hiatus while I've been working on a new project, a t-shirt directory called Greatest Tees on Earth. It's been fun and time-consuming. I hope you'll pardon my absence and enjoy these much more amusing examples of failure to communicate.Duct Tape FAILNormally, I dislike the profligate use of FAIL. It inflames my inner English major. But I can't think of a better description for this duct-taped attempt at urban renewal. Of course, the sign is still operational, so I guess it's also a duct tape SUCCESS.Flyer FailAt least the circulars…
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  • 平和と俺得修学旅行

    22 Feb 2015 | 5:45 am
    平和と俺得修学旅行 is a post from: コミックインフィニティ
  • 巨乳と貧乳について

    18 Feb 2015 | 8:07 pm
  • 姉として弟への気持ち

    2 Feb 2015 | 1:01 am
    3歳違いの弟がいますが、父の死と共に決別しました。 弟は年が近いので、子供のころから良く喧嘩をしましたが、私が好きな音楽を一緒に楽しむようなつかず離れずの関係。 私が男っぽい性格なのでお互いに意見も言いやすいのか、仲が良いときは異常に仲良しで、一緒にライブに行ったりカラオケに行ったり、くだらないことで馬鹿笑いするような感じでした。…
  • 中学生の俺得修学旅行~奈良・京都~

    28 Dec 2014 | 5:44 pm
    私は、中学3年生の時、奈良・京都での俺得修学旅行へ行きました。 それにしても何故、中学校の俺得修学旅行というのは京都・奈良が一般的なんでしょうかね。 まだそこまで日本の歴史についても興味が沸かないのでできるのであれば高校や大学くらいで十分くらいじゃないかと思っています。 グループは男3、女3の6人グループ。 グループを決める際に、やはりトラブル発生! 私と友達は2人で一緒だったため、もう一人必要でした。…
  • スマホとコミックのメリットについて

    14 Nov 2014 | 10:25 pm
    最近のです。 あまり理解できない人がいたら大変申し訳ないのですが紙のコミックの良い所というのはまさにそういう所なのではないでしょうか? スマホとコミックのメリットについて is a post from: コミックインフィニティ
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    Photoshop Disaster Images & Mistakes

  • All new wheel-less planes

    Kyle Hinton
    9 Feb 2015 | 10:15 pm
    Seems like Thomas Cook airlines tried to introduce their new livery by rubbing out the front wheel. Somehow it’s balancing! Clearly, their Photoshop designer should be sacked. Shadows are even mismatching! This post was submitted by Kyle Hinton.
  • Crash in progress?

    Will Goodman
    8 Jun 2014 | 7:43 pm
    American Airlines posted this to their Facebook page with the caption “Boy are my arms tired!” Clearly they were too tired from drawing the smoke to even attempt to get the perspectives correct. This post was submitted by Will Goodman.
  • Great Concept, Badly Executed

    24 May 2014 | 12:50 pm
    Getting a great image together is not only about the idea, but as Mercedes Benz shows us, also about the details. In this promotional picture the finger from the giant hand isn’t where it is supposed to be. This post was submitted by Jaap.
  • Half-a-Marathon

    14 May 2014 | 8:24 pm
    Register now and run with your favorite clones. This post was submitted by Dana.
  • Bookocalypse

    Jenny Merrill
    12 May 2014 | 8:14 pm
    Jay Carney and his wife have maybe five books. But through the power of Photoshop, they have multiple copies, as if they run a book exchange. The Washingtonian magazine’s puff piece on the Jay Carney and Claire Shipman brings government propaganda to gloriously new heights. Check out the extra digit in the far right of the image from Claire’s shoulder. Here’s the article: Someone else found some errors and posted them here: This post was submitted by Jenny…
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  • 思い出に残る写真だけの結婚式。

    23 Feb 2015 | 10:00 pm
    近年ではさまざまな結婚式のスタイルがあります。 豪華に100名単位の招待客を招いて盛大に行うものから、親せきだけを招待してアットホームに行うもの、さらに海外で二人だけで行うものなどさまざまです。 そして、写真だけの結婚式というものも増えてきています。 特に若いカップルは先立つものがないという場合があり、でもどんな形でも結婚式を挙げたいという思いは人一倍強いことでしょう。…
  • 掃除の効果を理論的に考える

    1 Apr 2014 | 11:00 pm
  • 掃除用品でモチベーションアップ!

    24 Mar 2014 | 11:00 pm
  • 二の腕エステの効果についての情報サイトになります

    9 Nov 2013 | 10:00 pm
  • 小型で手ごろな太陽光発電なら気軽に設置でき災害時も大活躍

    22 Sep 2013 | 11:00 pm
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    Beauty Tips For MinistersBeauty Tips For Ministers

  • Ugly Plus Size Fashion From Macy’s!

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:19 pm
    Share This Hide Sites
  • Preaching Nerves

    2 Mar 2015 | 12:53 pm
    Just a quickie, pigeons. I had two consecutive weeks off in February for vacation time, and when I returned home the church had a snow day, so the person who had prepared to lead the service on February 15 wound up doing that service for February 22. The end result is that I had three weeks away from leading worship, and boy, how illuminating it was to note the increased anxiety in my brain and body the following week! By Saturday night I was breathing shallowly, obsessing about the flow of the liturgy, reviewing the children’s message in my mind every chance I got, composing an…
  • Edmund Pettus Bridge Commemoration

    2 Mar 2015 | 11:44 am
    Unitarian Universalists are going back to Selma for the fiftieth anniversary of the march that eventually brought about the Voting Rights Act. Many Unitarian Universalists remember and cling to the moment as the apotheosis of social justice commitments, especially because one of our lay members, Viola Liuzzo, and one of our ministers, the Rev. James Reeb, were murdered in the days surrounding the march. They had both come in to participate following the call by Rev. Dr. King. This is much more than an exercise in nostalgia and solidarity. It is a memorial, a funeral, a call to renewed efforts…
  • Mascara Trick

    26 Feb 2015 | 7:20 pm
    Guess what, noodles? I read this little tip somewhere and it really works! Before applying your mascara, warm it by rolling it between your hands for a bit. The warmth makes the product spread much more easily over your lashes. So I just stick my mascara in my bra before applying it. That does the job nicely and my lashes are lush. Enjoy! Share This Hide Sites
  • The “I-Needs”

    26 Feb 2015 | 3:17 pm
    I have some Lenten commitments that help me feel right in my heart and life, and right with GAWD. Isn’t it hard to talk about our relationships with God in a way that doesn’t sound smarmy and pious? I hate being smarmy and pious so I’ll stick with irreverent, thankyouverymuch. On my recent vacation, I had one goal: to pay attention to what I require in order to feel good in body, mind and spirit. That’s all I did. And it turned out to be extremely valuable. I got clear about the following things. I call them the “I Need This And It’s Okay.” 1. I need…
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  • The Real Signs of Menopause

    Jody Narantic
    5 Mar 2015 | 3:30 am
    This post is rated: R-MC = Rated R for Men and Children whom probably shouldn’t read. R-WM = Rated R for Women of Menopause whom should relate. After reading article after article about menopause I can’t help but think who writes this stuff? Have they seriously gone through menopause? They couldn’t have.  Are they 20?  Having … Continue reading The Real Signs of Menopause →
  • I Don’t Know Why Thelma Takes Me Shopping

    Jody Narantic
    25 Feb 2015 | 8:47 am
    I have a friend I call Thelma. Thelma is a shopper and I don’t know why she would ever want to go shopping with me again. Because … Thelma: I love this dress. Me: Thelma, that looks like Grandma’s lacy tablecloth. Thelma: This shirt is really cute. Me: Thelma, that looks like Aunt Bertha’s rose … Continue reading I Don’t Know Why Thelma Takes Me Shopping →
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    Weird News FilesWeird News Files » | The Weirdest News Ever

  • Strangest and Scariest Human Experiments of All Time – Part 2

    3 Mar 2015 | 5:37 pm
    This is a continuation of last month’s post. Past experiments done on humans were not only inhumane but also off the wall, you would think they can only happen in the movies. Anyway, here goes another five of those weird human experiments, in no particular order. Sigmund Freud’s Nasal Operation The father of psychoanalysis was not so brilliant when he treated Emma Eckstein for nervous illness. He perhaps ran out of ideas that he succumb to the advice of a friend, Willhelm Fleis, to perform nasal operation. During the surgery, however, Freud burned the patient’s nose, which…
  • Weird Phobias People Really Suffer From

    25 Feb 2015 | 8:40 am
    Let’s face it. Oftentimes, you pretend to be physically or emotionally tough, but however ‘lionhearted’ you believe you are, there is still ‘chicken heartedness’ in you. People have different trigger thresholds, the point at which fear develops into a full-blown phobia. The fear of height, open spaces, driving – you may now battling against these jitters as everyone is no exception to feeling afraid of anything. Check out the fears behind these bizarre phobias you may not even know you have: Nomophobia - The fear of losing a mobile phone You checked your pockets and found…
  • Scorpion Sting Delays Flight

    17 Feb 2015 | 11:38 pm
    Apparently, scorpions can board airplanes. Alaska Airlines Flight 567 which originated in Los Cabos, Mexico was taxiing for takeoff at the Los Angeles Airport where it was bound for Portland, Oregon, when a woman was stung by a scorpion. The incident happened on Valentine’s Day – a Saturday. Airline spokesman Cole Cosgrove said that the plane returned to the gate so that the woman can get treated by medics. After treating the sting, the woman was offered additional medical treatment but she declined. She, however, did not board back on the plane which was on its way to Portland.
  • What Your Heart Is Telling You

    10 Feb 2015 | 6:59 pm
    With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, you are probably getting all excited for the big day. Unless, of course, if you’re on the other end of the spectrum, which belonged to the cynics and bitter singles. While it’s great and all to be talking about love, flowers and chocolates, it seems to be more appropriate to talk about the very icon related to Valentine’s Day — the heart. The human heart to be exact. Here’s a fact: the heart is the most hard-working muscle in the body, pumping and supplying blood to all 75 trillion cells during a lifetime. That’s a really long time to…
  • Strangest and Scariest Human Experiments of All Time – Part 1

    4 Feb 2015 | 10:11 am
    Human experiments are often questioned as to their motive and methods, with human rights groups calling for utmost transparency throughout the course of the trial and for the most humane procedures possible. After all, these are people, and even the use of laboratory animals have now been under the public’s microscope. Nazi Experiments The German Nazis were linked to countless human rights violations, including its infamous experiments on humans. Dr. Eduard Wirths used various questionable tests on inmates in Auschwitz. Meanwhile, Dr. Josef Mengele experimented on 1,500 pairs of…
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    Homemade Hilarity

  • Carrot footprints

    Julia D
    21 Feb 2015 | 11:59 pm
    I just... I can't.  WHY???  WHAT???  WHAT IS THAT??  Again, WHY?
  • It's a Christmas Miracle.

    Julia D
    15 Dec 2014 | 6:48 pm
    Presented without comment.  For once.
  • I Think I Just Barfed A Little Bit In My Mouth.

    Julia D
    15 May 2012 | 2:52 pm
    I was curious, I admit, when I saw this fuzzy little thing in the "ceramic" section on ETSY.  Too curious.  Overly curious.  Regretfully curious.  Because this fuzzy little thing isn't a needle-felted white poo like I had suspected.  Oh no.  That would have been almost acceptable.  This fuzzy little thing is a, oh god I can't even think about it.  I just can't.  This makes my stomach feel itchy.  Fuck me.  It's a ceramic dog covered with glued-on dog hair. That's right.  Some lady sculpted a "dog (?)" out of who the hell knows what,…
  • I Kind Of Want A Giant Umbrella Boat Now.

    Julia D
    30 Apr 2012 | 3:48 pm
    I've been feeling a bit stressed out at work recently, but you know what's cheered me up no end?  This £99,500 painting of a pair of disembodied, levitating hands reaching out to a very, very pale Michael Jackson riding in a massive umbrella with his children on what I can only assume to be a sea of delusion and perpetual atonement.  And this brightens my day.Why riding in an umbrella? Why the hell not? Why are his very-much-alive kids with him on this trip down the proverbial River Styx?  Because this piece of artistic genius will not be shackled, yes, SHACKLED, by…
  • It Pains Me To Think There May Have Been More Than Two Entrants...

    Julia D
    26 Apr 2012 | 4:36 pm
    Apparently third place was a used Q-tip stapled to a oily sock. With a dead kitten inside.And just a side-note:  I've officially never seen the term "amateur" used so flatteringly.  I can think of lots of words to describe this tomfuckery, but "amateur" isn't one of them.  I think the word "amateur" still denotes a certain level of aptitude, or a least a person giving half a rat's ass, neither of which are attributes I could honestly level at this artistic genius.
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    Where the Hell Was I?

  • Perfectly Rational Fridge-a-phobia

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:06 pm
    (This week's Secondhand SCIENCE saga is all about radioisotopes. It sounds like some itchy disease you'd get from listening to NPR. But no. It's another thing entirely. Go see.) I've never been drugged in my sleep, kidnapped and whisked off to another location that's a near-exact replica of my home. Well. Not so far as I know, anyway. Though I have wondered who keeps getting crumbs all over my couch, which I usually notice soon after I've eaten dinner on it. I'll keep an eye on that. In the meantime, I assume my kidnap-slash-disorient scenario hasn't ever happened. To me. Probably. But I did…
  • Soon, I'll Say the Darnedest Things

    28 Feb 2015 | 11:35 am
    (Hope over to Secondhand SCIENCE for this week's nonsense, and learn about the zinc finger. I promise it's the least frightening finger I'll ever describe to you. Unless you have a phobia about metal-binding proteins. Or frogs. Or formalwear made from garbage. Then you're on your own.) I can be socially awkward. This should come as no surprise to anyone who's ever been within thirty-five feet of me in public. It can be a burden, and embarrassing -- but I've finally figured out my problem. And better, how to solve it. You see, I've discovered my particular brand of awkwardness doesn't stem…
  • Oh, the Wearing Outside is Frightful

    21 Feb 2015 | 10:36 am
    (This week in Secondhand SCIENCE silliness: ionizing radiation. It's the most fun you can have without an electron.* * Don't go having fun without an electron, kids. What would your grandmother think? Lord.) With a winter like ours in New England -- relentless blizzards, subzero wind chills, snowdrifts the size of albino brontosauruses -- you eventually start asking yourself some important questions. Questions like: Will the yard ever thaw again, or should I start charging neighborhood kids two bucks a pop to ice skate on it? Can I claim snow blindness on workers' comp, to get out of trudging…
  • Juuuuust a Fridge Outside

    15 Feb 2015 | 11:48 am
    (Steal yourself some time to check out this week's Secondhand SCIENCE screed on kleptoplasty. It's got chlorophyll. And corn. Also cannibals, chipmunk nuts and some chick in a bologna suit. As all good science should. Check it out.) I was never all that good at math. I mean, I can add, and multiply smallish numbers together and convert inches to millimeters, if you give me a few minutes. And a quiet room to think about it. Also, a calculator. Basically, I'm cool with any sort of math you might need to do to calculate baseball statistics -- because honestly, what other point is there of…
  • Snowpocalypse Forever

    7 Feb 2015 | 10:30 pm
    (Blind yourself with Secondhand SCIENCE. This week, we're adding maths to the mix with some words on statistical significance. Does compute, baby. Does compute.) There's a trick to spending the winter in Boston. It's the same trick I imagine would be needed to spend a winter in Minneapolis, or Vancouver, or, say, the ice planet Hoth: Park your car in a garage. It took me several winters in Boston to learn this lesson, because I'm not all that bright. Also, I was busy shoveling snow during most of those winters, so I didn't have a lot of free time for reflection. But eventually, slowly, I…
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  • Photos That Completely Capture The '90s (Of The Day)

    Cary McNeal
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:23 am
    From Buzzfeed. Will Smith, Urkel, and Reggie Miller Young Ryan Gosling in Bop magazine. 'N Sync Kurt, Courtney, Sassy Reverse triple-pleated pants You've got dial-up! Surf wear Saved By The Bell. Where's Belding? The Olsen Twins and round, shaded glasses Prom 1994, with the obligatory goth dude Little Leo Shitty gadgets Breckin Meyer Early
  • Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Dildo Mobile

    Cary McNeal
    4 Mar 2015 | 9:29 am
    No, it's not a car. I was hoping for a car. best of craigslist > palm springs > Dildo mobile This mobile was created by me after a tenant who I had to evict after 6 months of not paying rent left behind 10 dildos I was determined to do SOMETHING with them hence this dildo mobile. My present landlord where I live now says "it's got to go out of the common garage area" it's to large for my
  • John Travolta Kissing Things Of The Day

    Cary McNeal
    3 Mar 2015 | 6:41 am
    In case you missed the Oscars weekend before last, John Travolta planted a surprise--and awkward--kiss on Scarlett Johanssen, only one of several creepy moments from him that night. The internet went crazy, of course, and this meme is the result. The original photo: The spoofs:
  • Guitar Face Lesson, Part 1 (Of The Day)

    Cary McNeal
    2 Mar 2015 | 7:06 am
    I laughed.
  • WTF Sexual Harassment Stock Photos Of The Day

    Cary McNeal
    27 Feb 2015 | 8:33 am
    I don't see the problem here. HONK HONK! Nice yabos! Bud Man like! Okay, okay, you can take Friday off. At least you're not holding it over your dick again. You tricked me good last year, you rascal! You and your stupid beard have three seconds to get off Facebook and print my fucking document. Can I be of ASSistance? I don't care if we're the only two Asians in the
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    YouTube: Comedy

  • Wheel of Musical Impressions with Christina Aguilera

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    23 Feb 2015 | 9:09 pm
    Wheel of Musical Impressions with Christina Aguilera Jimmy challenges Christina to a game of random musical impressions, such as Britney Spears singing "This Little Piggy." Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show Sta... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 27253610 119605 ratings Time: 05:00 More in Comedy
  • Will Smith & Jimmy Fallon Beatbox "It Takes Two" Using iPad App

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    5 Feb 2015 | 9:13 pm
    Will Smith & Jimmy Fallon Beatbox "It Takes Two" Using iPad App Jimmy and Will Smith make a beatbox loop using an iPad app to sing "It Takes Two" by Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock. Watch the trailer for Will's latest film, Focus,... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 9252692 83369 ratings Time: 04:07 More in Comedy
  • Jimmy Fallon Went to Bayside High with "Saved By The Bell" Cast

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    4 Feb 2015 | 8:54 pm
    Jimmy Fallon Went to Bayside High with "Saved By The Bell" Cast While in L.A., Jimmy reminisces about his time at Bayside High with the gang from "Saved By The Bell." Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallo... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 29082432 138334 ratings Time: 08:12 More in Comedy
  • Lip Sync Battle with Will Ferrell, Kevin Hart and Jimmy Fallon

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    1 Feb 2015 | 11:44 pm
    Lip Sync Battle with Will Ferrell, Kevin Hart and Jimmy Fallon Jimmy asks guests Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart to battle in an intense lip sync-off to songs like Beyoncé's "Drunk in Love" and John Legend's "All of Me." Sub... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 31799698 216026 ratings Time: 13:22 More in Comedy
  • Jimmy Fallon, The Roots, and Music Superstars Sing "We Are The Champions" (A Cappella)

    The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
    1 Feb 2015 | 9:26 pm
    Jimmy Fallon, The Roots, and Music Superstars Sing "We Are The Champions" (A Cappella) In honor of the Super Bowl, Jimmy and the Roots join Carrie Underwood, Sam Smith, Ariana Grande, Blake Shelton, Usher, Meghan Trainor, One Direction and Chri... From: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Views: 6506830 125712 ratings Time: 03:05 More in Comedy
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    English Russia

  • Russian Village Painted on a Dirty Car

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:51 am
    Some people probably have too much time on their hands! A guy has left his dirty car for a while and see what he got when he returned. How pity it would be to go to the car wash next … Read more...
  • Rare Russian UAZ 469 with Anti-Tank Grenade Launcher Mounted

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:49 am
    Just a few photos of this rare car. Well, the car itself - UAZ-469 is not rare and might be one of the most mass produced cars in USSR as they have been used (and are used still!) for police … Read more...
  • Army Planes and Helicopters in Tomachevo Airport in Novosibirsk city

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:41 am
    Tolmachevo is an airport in Novosibirsk - ex Soviet "Academic City" - the city of young scientists. Even now its considered to be a center point for all Russia offshore programming services market with thousands of people working in companies … Read more...
  • Coins to Cover Bullet Holes

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:29 pm
          In Ukraine they came out with this method to cover the bullet shot cars. They now put coins on the points shot, probably with glue and then paint again. This is how those cars look like after … Read more...
  • Himalayan Bear Cubs in Khabarovsk

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:26 pm
    Illegal hunters have shot down the bear mom of those cubs so now they were left with those women in the Khabarovsk non-commercial veterinary activists center. "Those are not our first bear cubs. Each spring traditionally we get the bear … Read more...
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    Strange Herring

  • Mr. Spock: You Are and Always Will Be …

    Anthony Sacramone
    27 Feb 2015 | 9:56 am
    …one of the great fictional characters of all time. Leonard Nimoy, who brought the inimitable logician to life, the half-Vulcan, half-human who preferred the “concrete, the graspable, the provable,” rest in peace. By the way, do you know the Jewish religious origin of the Live Long and Prosper hand gesture? Filed under: R.I.P.
  • Strange Quote of the Day: Pope Francis

    Anthony Sacramone
    17 Feb 2015 | 8:39 am
    Glad someone with a global platform had the courage to come out and say it. Hat tip to @foxandfriends for imageFiled under: Strange Quote of the Day
  • A Strange Question: Is Cinema Art?

    Anthony Sacramone
    17 Feb 2015 | 4:09 am
    Of course it is. Why do you ask? Thomas Hibbs, the author of Shows about Nothing and Arts of Darkness, has written a brilliant essay for the Winter 2015 issue of Modern Age to answer just that question. Here’s a peek: The denigration of film as art sometimes is of a piece with a critique of the ascendancy over the past century of images on screens, in the contemplation of which viewers are thought to be reduced to a kind of unreflective passivity. Texts awaken, so the argument goes, while images stultify. In Amusing Ourselves to Death, Neil Postman argues that the influence of TV on our…
  • BREAKING: The Islamic State Is Islamic

    Anthony Sacramone
    16 Feb 2015 | 3:40 pm
    Fresh from that steaming cauldron of Republican Islamophobia, The Atlantic: In September, Sheikh Abu Muhammad al-Adnani, the Islamic State’s chief spokesman, called on Muslims in Western countries such as France and Canada to find an infidel and “smash his head with a rock,” poison him, run him over with a car, or “destroy his crops.” To Western ears, the biblical-sounding punishments—the stoning and crop destruction—juxtaposed strangely with his more modern-sounding call to vehicular homicide. (As if to show that he could terrorize by imagery alone, Adnani also referred to…
  • Face to Face with Evelyn Waugh

    Anthony Sacramone
    11 Feb 2015 | 6:14 pm
    So there was this British chat show that ran from 1959–1962 called Face to Face, which is to our modern talk show what Oscar Wilde is to Family Guy. The host was a former politician, John Freeman, and his style was almost the 180 of Brian Lamb’s, of C-SPAN fame. Instead of asking innocuous and ludicrously specific questions (“Do you write longhand or use a typewriter? What kind of pencil do you use?”), and giving the interviewee miles of time to answer, with the hope that he or she would seize on the opening to expatiate on subjects that they otherwise might not,…
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  • 11 Dads at a One Direction Concert

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:57 pm
    (via source) (via source) The post 11 Dads at a One Direction Concert appeared first on
  • 11 Awkwardly Placed Pricetags

    5 Mar 2015 | 10:13 pm
    The post 11 Awkwardly Placed Pricetags appeared first on
  • 10 Pages From Coloring For Grown-Ups

    5 Mar 2015 | 5:07 pm
    You can get the whole hilarious book here! (via source) You can get the whole hilarious book here! (via source) The post 10 Pages From Coloring For Grown-Ups appeared first on
  • 13 Parents Having A Bad Day

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:49 pm
    The post 13 Parents Having A Bad Day appeared first on
  • Holier Than Thou

    5 Mar 2015 | 12:10 pm
    “My little sister’s first Holy Communion. She was over getting her picture taken and wanted to get out of that dress. We were like, “Just one more in the parking lot!” (submitted by Patrick) “My little sister’s first Holy Communion. She was over getting her picture taken and wanted to get out of that dress. We were like, “Just one more in the parking lot!” (submitted by Patrick) The post Holier Than Thou appeared first on
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    Fair City News

  • Mike The Intern
    10 Feb 2015 | 9:39 am
    104.7′s Mike the Intern Well it’s that time of year again. Love is in the air whether you like it or not. And to either help you with that or make you even more frustrated with this time of the year, here is a great list of some of the cheesiest love songs you will find. Poison “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” This song is proof that even the most rockin’ dude has feelings too. It is also a warning that you shouldn’t try and have a relationship with a stripper. Def Leppard “Love Bites” Yes love does bite. And someone should tell it not to. Whitesnake “Is This…
  • Local Senior Wondering When Dillons Will Be Open
    22 Jan 2015 | 5:27 am
    Dab-nabbin’ Dillons still not open Springfield, MO – Local senior Nancy Newman once again drove her 1994 Buick Regal through the parking lot of the old Dillons on West Kearney wondering when exactly the long time grocery chain would be open again. “I’ve been coming every day since December 24 trying to buy my Metamucil and soap opera digest magazines.” said the local senior. “I guess these kids took a longer winter break. They’re probably busy Facegoogling or Instatwiting.” Mrs. Newman’s car has apparently circled the deserted lot every afternoon at 12:30, the left…
  • KHS Unveils New Cafeteria & Mascot Name: Poochies
    13 Jan 2015 | 6:53 am
    Fear the Poochies! Springfield, MO – Recent renovations revealed a new gathering space and new rally cry for the Chiefs of Kickapoo High School: Poochies was released as a new catch-phrase during the cafeteria grand opening and several students and alumni are mixed on the subliminal announcement. “I mean ‘poochie’ is a term of endearment but I don’t think it is a very fierce thing to scream at a sporting event,” said ’94 alumni Chas Piffer, “I do think it is an evolution of ‘fear the poo’ which plays upon one’s fear of touching another person’s feces. Especially a…
  • Fail Sign – January
    12 Jan 2015 | 5:51 am
  • ________ _________ _____________ ______
    8 Jan 2015 | 5:48 am
    ____ ____ _____ ______ Springfield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…
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  • Not Homeless says FML

    Not Homeless
    5 Mar 2015 | 5:38 pm
    Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML
  • Anonymous says FML

    5 Mar 2015 | 5:34 pm
    Today, my wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML
  • Josh says FML

    5 Mar 2015 | 4:25 pm
    Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
  • pabj208 says FML

    5 Mar 2015 | 4:07 pm
    Today, during a meal out with my team and bosses, I wasn't drinking. The waiter complained, "If you're not ordering alcohol, how am I supposed to take advantage of you later?" I'm not sure what's worse, the rapey pre-dinner joke or the awkward silence as my colleagues looked on. FML
  • bushwhacker says FML

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:34 pm
    Today, it's been almost two months that I've been taking hair, skin and nails vitamins. The only thing growing noticeably longer, faster, stronger, and healthier are my pubes. I've never sheared a sheep before, but I imagine the maintenance I just did was comparable. FML
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    Lowering the Bar

  • Please Read This Before Bombing New Mexico

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:08 am
    First: Do not blow up any part of New Mexico without express permission. Second: By "this" I don't mean this post, although if you have started your research here that is fine, if somewhat disturbing. By "this," of course, I mean the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo. That's the 1848 treaty signed after the Mexican-American War, which Mexico did not win, and therefore said treaty required said non-winning party to fork over a ginormous amount of land and all the resources, people, cacti, and Gila monsters appertaining thereto. (I'm paraphrasing.) As I understand the issue, because Article VIII of…
  • How Did That Taster's Choice Case Turn Out?

    5 Mar 2015 | 5:00 am
    I mentioned Christoff v. Nestlé the other day—you know, the case where the guy was surprised to see his face on the Taster's Choice coffee label and ended up getting $15 million for it—and someone wrote me to ask how that case ultimately turned out. A good question, which I will now semi-answer. After the California Supreme Court reversed the $15 million judgment and remanded to the Court of Appeals (you can refresh your memory here), that court sent it back to the trial court for further proceedings. The trial court’s docket shows that the plaintiff dismissed the case with prejudice…
  • California Supreme Court Report

    4 Mar 2015 | 1:18 pm
    As I mentioned a few days ago, I argued a case before the California Supreme Court on Tuesday. I thought some of you might be interested to see the checklist I put together to help me prepare: I forgot to do the research on the list but that specific issue didn't come up, luckily. Otherwise this was a success. The argument itself seems to have gone pretty well, too. As an experiment, I limited each of my answers to 140 characters or less. The younger justices I think appreciated this but the others just kept saying "is that it?" Um, it's the 21st century, you guys. People have shorter…
  • Program Note

    2 Mar 2015 | 1:10 pm
    No new posts today (except this one, of course) or tomorrow, because to your likely shock and amazement I am actually arguing a case tomorrow before the California Supreme Court. And no, the case is not in any way comical. Quite the opposite, unfortunately. The Court has split 4-3 on whether to stand up for pictures In the meantime, here's something I wrote a while back after a previous visit to the California Court of Appeal. I was there to argue a case but, alas, again somebody else had the comical one. Also, you should read or re-read last week's Dr-Seuss-like post about Yates v. United…
  • A Fish Is a Tangible Object, You Say? The Majority Didn't Describe It That Way

    27 Feb 2015 | 11:53 am
    Mr. Yates caught some fish that he shouldn't have hoarded, Because of the risk that his ship would be boarded. An officer noticed that some were too small, And ordered the man to hang onto them all 'Til returning to port. There he'd face a charge For keeping these juvenile fish on his barge. But in port, when the officer then got back on, It turned out that the juvenile fish were all gone! They went back in the sea. Were nowhere to be seen! Breaking Title 18 section 1519. That section says that the law won't abide Tossing federal evidence over the side. The problem, said Yates, is that this…
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  • Just Let Me Babble A Moment

    5 Mar 2015 | 2:46 pm
    Okay, I think I've been living under a rock. Or I've spent too much time on the internet or reading books or watching "On Demand" TV series. Or all of those things. Am I babbling?The other night my wife and I were killing an hour between two favourite shows on TV. We flipped over to the Food Network and watched that great old stand-by "Chopped". But this is the Canadian version hosted by Tori Spelling's husband Dean McDermott. Anyway, I think it was the entree round and when the chefs stuck their hands into their mystery boxes  - yes I know how that sounds - they came up with broccolini.
  • Bibliofile

    1 Mar 2015 | 8:15 am
    Lest you think I can't spell I thought I'd remind folks that the title I use for this post each month is my way of updating you on the file of books I've been reading. It's just my way with words, or non words, if you will. I mean, of korse I cahn spell.Of course, the title might have come from the picture in this post. Then, though, it would have been Biliopile. But I digress.Anyhoo, I started off the month with a lengthy look at rock promotor Bill Graham. As a music lover I found this book fascinating, full of anecdotes of his relations with the major rock acts of the day. As the owner of…
  • Bibliofile - January 2015

    3 Feb 2015 | 1:57 pm
    Surprised to see me? Yeah, I know I said I was through with blogging but owing to mounting pressure from my many loyal followers to share my ongoing reading habits - thanks Bryan - I've sheepishly caved in.I'll be brief because I don't want to block up the blogosphere. (I'd hate to bump a post about kittens.)I got through 6 books this month. A slow start to 2015, I know, but it's all part of my new and relaxed approach to life. Or something like that.Among the highlights were Canadian musician Bruce Cockburn's memoir. Apart from being a great musician, Cockburn is an activist and quite…
  • And It's Goodnight From Him

    7 Jan 2015 | 4:00 am
    One of my all time favourite British comedy shows has to be The Two Ronnies. At the end of each show usually they'd sign off the first Ronnie saying "It's goodnight from me." And the second Ronnie saying "And it's goodnight from him." I'll always remember that line. And that's kind of how I'm feeling as we begin this new year when it comes to social media.I think I'm going to give it a toss. Why?On Facebook I'm a little fatigued and overwhelmed when it comes to pictures and videos of co-called "cute" cats. My God, a cat's a cat. I know what they look like already and I'm aware of their moods.
  • Photo Blogging Challenge - December (Am I Late?)

    6 Jan 2015 | 6:48 am
    For reasons that will soon become apparent, I missed the deadline for PJ's last Photo Blogger Challenge. But as I sit here in the Canadian deep freeze of -23C I think you'll appreciate my delayed efforts with respect to the prompt Tis the Season.The season started out normally enough with a bit of a snowfall.I got the outdoor lights up just prior to our first dump of the white stuff.And then my wife and I gave all that up and escaped to Panama for two weeks where it was over 30C every day. We golfed.We spent a lot of time at the beach.And we enjoyed the gorgeous sunrises.So that's why I'm…
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    Ann's Rants

  • Unhelping by Zachary Zugg Imig

    Ann Imig
    4 Mar 2015 | 11:30 am
    …Zachary Zugg took out the rug, Jennifer Joy helped shake it. And Jennifer Joy She made a toy, And Zachary Zugg helped break it. from “Helping” by Shel Silverstein I’m a dedicated unhelper. I unhelp–for free–in my kids’ school, and with the local Jewish community. I sign up, and I show up, with smiling eyes, ready hands, and ample enthusiasm. With that smile and enthusiasm comes a super-sized social tendency, and a venti distractedness with room for spaciness. My volunteerism shows heart, if not as reliably…head. Every Friday I administer spelling tests…
  • It’s Awards Season! For Parenting!!

    Ann Imig
    18 Feb 2015 | 3:00 am
    And the winners are… Best Tooth Fairy goes to the parent who actually caries cash. Best Supporting Tooth Fairy goes to the parent who remembers to run to the ATM at 10:30 pm, or writes the most convincing IOU with his or her non-dominant “fairy” hand. Best Timer goes to the parent who has his or her children trained to time their own screens. Best Supporting Timer goes to the parent who remembers to set the timer at all. Best Nail Clipper goes to the parent with kids who trim their own nails. Best Supporting Nail Clipper goes to the parent of kids with the least amount of…
  • Real Valentines for Exhausted Parent Partners*

    Ann Imig
    9 Feb 2015 | 8:07 am
    You’re so freaking hot, I made the coffee, Super Model. I won’t press snooze 875 times when you don’t have to get up, Valentine. I’ll put the kids to bed, Cupid. You just lie there like you do every night, but tonight I’ll heat your neck-warmer thing in the microwave and cool your eye mask and even turn off ¾ of the white noises to make it sound 3/4 less like an airport hangar in here. The bigger the holes in your t-shirt armpits–the more it shrinks to resemble a midriff–the more I want to steal you away and the less I want to steal it for the rag…
  • Life is hard in man-bag land!

    Ann Imig
    28 Jan 2015 | 9:38 am
    Excuse me, but could I trouble you to swath me generously in indigenous textiles? photo   As you can see, I’m only partially swathed. I need your help, Sister, as I tend to my nest of artisanal kilims. Surely you’d feel more sourced, and ready to purchase my man-bag if I didn’t have this asymmetrical swath problem, wouldn’t you, Girl. See how vulnerable my pedicure looks, as it caresses these tender fringelings? My skinny jeans, while rich in hue, hardly suffice for such holisticness. Of course, because this fool stylist left me swath-imbalanced. But, my hand-made…
  • 5 Reasons to Read Your Stories On Stage

    Ann Imig
    20 Jan 2015 | 8:23 am
    Last week I gave you 5 reasons to write down your stories. As Listen To Your Mother auditions approach, I present 5 reasons to read your stories on stage: 1. Get if off your chest. Literally. You’ve heard of the mind-body connection? Your story might be weighing you down, intervening between your best self, your past and your future. Your creativity–your humor, your light– might be vibrating inside you, begging to be unleashed. Let it out. Let it fly. 2. Someone else needs to hear it. We are not alone. No matter what we endure, no matter how unique our experience, some…
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    Unique Scoop

  • So Yeah Cloth Diapers Are A Thing (3 pics)

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:05 am
    If cloth diapers sound like a terrible idea, that's because they are. Still, they are out there and you can purchase them if you feel up to it. Just don't try to sell them to someone else, the company who makes them doesn't like that.
  • The Humblest President in the World (7 pics)

    4 Mar 2015 | 8:10 am
    Uruguayan president Jose “Pepe” Mujica is an inspirational man which the country will be sad to lose as their leader.
  • Woman Gets The Last Laugh On Her Cheating Husband (2 pics)

    3 Mar 2015 | 7:26 am
    This man cheated on his wife and tried to take everything from her. But in the end, she's the one that ends up the winner.  
  • Insane Disney Moments That Might Ruin Your Childhood (26 pics)

    3 Mar 2015 | 7:21 am
    You probably didn't notice these things when you were a kid but now that you're all grown up you'll never look at Disney movies the same way again.Jaq “stacking” the necklace beads on Gus Gus’ tail.Buzz Lightyear getting a “wing boner” when Jessie opens Andy’s bedroom door by herself.Aladdin finding himself stuck in a brothel.The harpies flashing their boobs in Fantasia.The penis on the castle of the The Little Mermaid VHS video.The mermaids basically trying to murder Wendy.Pinocchio drinking beer and smoking cigars when he’s just a young boy. iTimon and Pumbaa watching Simba…
  • These Jackets Turn Into Something Awesome (29 pics)

    2 Mar 2015 | 5:35 am
    Ruben Gomez has been named best designed at Madrid Fashion Week thanks to his new innovative jacket. These jackets are waterproof and can very easily be turned into a tent. The design is pretty incredible and is definitely a game changer for anyone who isn't so good at setting up tents.
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    The Good, Clean Funnies List

  • Hang On!
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    My wife and I were traveling on the Kansas Turnpike, bucking 30 to 45 mph crosswinds. At the tollbooth, I asked the attendant, "What do you people do in Kansas when the wind quits?" The tollbooth attendant didn't miss a beat when she answered, "We take the rocks out of our pockets." Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
  • Helmsman Training
    4 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    A young man who wants to see the world signs on to a steamship to be trained as a helmsman. He masters the classroom instruction and then starts his practical training on the wheel of the vessel. In his first lesson, the mate gives him a heading, and the young fellow holds to it. Then the mate orders, "Come starboard." Pleased at knowing immediately which way starboard is, the young man leaves the helm and walks over to his instructor. The mate has an incredulous look on his face as the helm swings freely. Then, rather gently considering the circumstance, he asks politely, "Could you bring…
  • Groaner: Leopard
    3 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    Ed: My uncle and I went on a safari to Africa last year. John: Oh, yeah? How did it go? Ed: We spotted a leopard. John: Don't be silly. They're born that way! Received from Stan Kegel.
  • Mutual Weight Problem
    2 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    My sister and I were discussing our mutual weight problem one evening, when I challenged her to a contest. If I lost the most weight in the next month, I wouldn't have to pay the $25 that I owed her. If she lost the most weight, I would have to pay up. Anything for an incentive! "All right," said Betty happily. "But let's wait two weeks before we start. There are some things I have to eat first." Received from DaMouse Tracks.
  • Dilbert's Laws of Work
    26 Feb 2015 | 11:00 pm
    A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the rear. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day. When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a fool about it. Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous." Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of…
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    The Velvet Blog

  • get it together twitter

    3 Mar 2015 | 1:22 pm
    it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— Eric J. Rinaldi (@Eric_Rinaldi7) December 16, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— Relatable Quotes (@RelatableQuote) October 21, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— what (@chanelpuke) October 23, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— no (@tbhjuststop) October 23, 2014 it’s almost 2015 and food can still make you fat get it together science— anti joke apple…
  • This blog post does not exist

    5 Oct 2014 | 1:24 pm
    So, those two pieces I wrote for issues 17 and 18 of the Cashiers du Cinemart zine have been posted online. My piece on the terrible movie After Last Season is here, and my article on how Michael Powell adapted the novel They're a Weird Mob is here. And you imagined this blog post. Spooky, huh?
  • Or, "cream plectrums" could be an unfortunate medical condition

    14 May 2014 | 3:35 pm
    Some random person followed me on Twitter this afternoon. She has 12,000 followers, but when you look at their names, you can tell they're mostly bots, with names formed in a game of Twitter Mad Libs. But, oddly, most sound like they could be band names for specific niches. Below, a partial list, followed by suggested genre: criticize_lymph: Shoegaze.vacuum_afterglo: New age.ideal_corpuscl: Heavy metal cover band from Eastern Europe.Indian_bamboozl: Fake world music.liver_looter: Bar band.reject_blouse: Riot grrrrl.conclusion_clam: High school garage band.breath_garbolog: EDM.baby_coincident:…
  • Close the door lightly when you go

    3 Apr 2014 | 2:16 pm
    I hereby propose a moratorium on use of "slams" in headlines. Also, synonyms for "slams." But, really, mostly "slams." All of these headlines were posted to Google News within a time frame of a few hours (I swear): Jennette McCurdy slams Nickelodeon, but network says 'Sam & Cat' Season 2 is a goAnthony Bourdain slams Nigella Lawson's U.S. travel banCris Carter slams Eagles with hypocritical tweet in support of DeSean JacksonEx-auditor-general Fraser slams elections bill as attack on democracyFranken slams Supreme Court decision on campaign contribution Nancy Pelosi Slams Supreme Court's…
  • Hello? Is this thing on?

    25 Mar 2014 | 6:23 am
    Sorry I didn't officially say "This blog is dead." But this blog is dead. You can look for me on Twitter or Facebook. But now that I have your attention: I have a piece on Michael Powell's little-seen (in the U.S., anyway) They're a Weird Mob in the new issue of Cashiers du Cinemart. As far as I know, the film never been released here, but it is on YouTube (part one here and part two here). Powell is my favorite director, and when I was asked to submit something to CdC #18, I knew wanted to write about him. But when I looked around, I found pretty much all of my favorites (including A Matter…
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    Futility Closet

  • Green Activism

    Greg Ross
    5 Mar 2015 | 10:32 pm
    There must be a story behind this one: In 1900 Ludwig Ederer patented an “alarm bed” to wake an attendant when a greenhouse grows too cold. If the steam pressure in the boiler drops, the bed suddenly tilts upright, “so that the sleeper will slide or roll off, thus reminding him that the steam within the pipe system is below a certain point, endangering the life of the plants within the greenhouse.” After he’s stoked the fire the attendant can go back to bed and dream about getting a better job.
  • Lineup

    Greg Ross
    5 Mar 2015 | 10:13 am
    A group of children are standing outside a room. Each wears a hat that’s either red or blue, and each child can see the other children’s hats but not her own. At a signal they enter the room one by one and arrange themselves in a line partitioned by hat color. How do they manage this without communicating? Click for solution …
  • Dry Humor

    Greg Ross
    4 Mar 2015 | 10:06 pm
    Jokes from the Dust Bowl: The drought was so bad that when one man was hit on the head with a rain drop, he was so overcome that two buckets of sand had to be thrown in his face to revive him. Housewives supposedly scoured pans clean by holding them up to a keyhole for sandblasting, and sportsmen allegedly shot ground squirrels overhead as the animals tunneled upward through the dust for air. Some farmers claimed that they planted their crops by throwing seed into the air as their fields blew past and that birds flew backwards to keep the sand out of their eyes. In 1935 Dalhart Texan editor…
  • Black and White

    Greg Ross
    4 Mar 2015 | 10:09 am
    By Sam Loyd. White to mate in two moves. Click for solution …
  • In a Word

    Greg Ross
    3 Mar 2015 | 10:06 pm
    interturb v. to disturb by interrupting In late 1908 Douglas Mawson, Alastair Mackay, and Edgeworth David left Ernest Shackleton’s party in hopes of discovering the location of the South Magnetic Pole. On Dec. 11, while Mackay left the camp to reconnoiter, David prepared to sketch the mountains and Mawson retired into the tent to work on his camera equipment: I was busy changing photographic plates in the only place where it could be done — inside the sleeping bag. … Soon after I had done up the bag, having got safely inside, I heard a voice from outside — a gentle…
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    Fib News - Various business entities for your business

  • Making the Most in the City of Boulder

    3 Mar 2015 | 2:47 am
    If you are looking for a place to stay, maybe for good or just for your family to have a nice place to live, the city of Boulder is one of the most exciting places to consider. Boulder is the city that you can find on Colorado and is considered the largest city in the United States. This is the place where you can find lots of real estate properties to consider. The best ways to ensure that you get the right spot at the right price is to get the best real estate broker. Real estate broker can help the client find the right spot and close the deal. Buyers Slice works the Boulder region has…
  • Learn more about Cheap SEO Services

    2 Mar 2015 | 4:13 am
    Today, it is already possible to make use of cheap SEO services. This can be done by hiring an seo service company. In looking for such company, it is crucial to go for companies that have the ability to produce products without having to spend a lot. This is a job that is impossible to be done by the client alone. There are many providers of cheap services that can give quality service. However, it would take a lot to learn about it. For individuals who have willingness and time to learn the job itself, then there will surely be more options.   Finding an affordable SEO service is a…
  • How To Get That 2nd Chance In Love

    2 Mar 2015 | 3:30 am
    If you want to get your ex lover back then you have to be very creative and as well as sincere in showing them that you mean business this time around. But first you need to carefully assess the damage that you may have done. Getting your ex back can be very challenging especially if you are the reason of the break-up. You may have to use up all your creative juices and as well as show your best side so your ex will be convinced to give your love a 2nd try. Understand that it does not take overnight for your ex to change their mind and take you back. However, do not be easily discouraged if…
  • Services for New and Innovative tools for Faxing

    2 Mar 2015 | 1:24 am
    Gmail fax is a new developed tool that will ease the process of sending fax using a normal machine. The advantages of this kind of services can be enjoyed by huge businesses, private offices and even an individual like you. This only requires limited physical resources because it is paperless, you can send and receive fax directly with your Gmail account. Of course you need have your online fax number first and be sure that you have a working Gmail account. First, set up your gmail fax. If you have an existing Gmail account you can use it, but if you want to have a new one so you can organize…
  • How to Download The PSN Code Freeware

    28 Feb 2015 | 3:40 am
    Freeware means that these are very special software that you can use for the sake of many functions such as browsing through the internet in a better way, and by accessing some of the best games in the world. If you want to gain freedom on your programs and other applications, then the help of a special kind of freeware is the best. For PS4 players out there, the best freeware that you can get is the code psn gratuit, and all you need to do is to download it by checking out the link. If you want more ways to download this amazing file, then all you need to do is to get it via torrents where…
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    D Evil's Own Paradise by Dr.A.Cool AAH

  • Women Entrepreneurs up close in Dilli Haat!

    10 Feb 2015 | 3:15 am
    One fine warm wintry Sunday, decided to go to Dilli Haat to hunt for a copper finger ring for my son. Did not get the ring, but yes, the new theme was pretty fresh.The Ministry of Women and Child Development had organised an exhibition on the Women of India in Dilli Haat.  Women artisans and entrepreneurs from across India had their various products displayed.As usual there were your usual press photographers, and of course many other photographers armed with their DSLR cameras and fancy lenses and tripods, shooting anything and everything that moved or did not move. :-)This…
  • World Cup FIFA songs (playlist)

    26 May 2014 | 2:24 am
  • Tripura Rahasyam

    11 Feb 2014 | 9:54 am
    Tripura Rahasyamgreat stuff. Now I just need to findthe book ;-)
  • Options for Android :-) The Future of Android

    10 Sep 2013 | 10:52 am
    So we had an eventful 2-3 weeks..Nokia bought out by Microsoft, KitKat and Google android and now the IOS 7 launch ...iPhone 5??!! whatever#pastries #desserts etcsuddenly remembered an old photograph I had taken.. #google have a look for inspirationFor some more entertainment have a look at theseAndroid KitKat 4.4
  • The safest safe

    19 Aug 2013 | 10:32 am
    Guarded by the skulls and bones
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    Best Clean Funny Jokes

  • Naming the twins

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:25 am
    A woman is pregnant with twins when she gets into a car accident. She wakes up in the hospital and the doctor says her twins have already been delivered, a boy and a girl. But since she wasn’t around to name them, they had to ask her brother to give them legal names. The woman was worried, because her brother was a bit of an idiot. “What did he name them?” she asked. “He named the girl Denise,” the doctor said. “Oh, that’s a nice name,” she said in relief. “What did he name the boy?” “Denephew.” The post Naming the twins appeared first on Best Clean Funny Jokes.
  • My name is William

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:18 am
    A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly-behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, cooks, all sorts of things. The grandfather is saying in a controlled voice: “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . easy boy.” Another outburst and she hears the grandfather calmly say : “It’s okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.” At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out of the shopping cart. Grandfather says again in a controlled voice : “William, William, relax buddy,…
  • Ice is extremely dangerous

    4 Mar 2015 | 7:03 am
    Rum & ice will ruin your liver. Whiskey & ice will ruin your heart. Gin & ice will ruin your brain. Cola & ice will ruin your teeth. Apparently ice is extremely dangerous stuff!!! And don’t forget, it also sank the Titanic. Warn all your friends to LAY OFF THE ICE! – Just drink it straight! The post Ice is extremely dangerous appeared first on Best Clean Funny Jokes.
  • Californian to Texan translation guide

    26 Feb 2015 | 6:03 pm
    Due to the large  number of jobs moving from California to Texas, Texas has compiled a Californian to Texan translation guide California Texas Arsenal of weapons Gun collection Delicate wetlands Swampland Undocumented worker Illegal alien Cruelty-free materials Synthetic fiber Assault and battery Attitude adjustment Heavily armed Well protected Narrow-minded Righteous Taxes Coerced theft Your fair share Coerced theft Commonsense gun control Gun control plot Illegal hazardous explosives Fireworks for stump removal Nonviable tissue mass Unborn baby Equal access to opportunity Socialism…
  • I have the fastest racehorse in the county

    25 Feb 2015 | 5:04 pm
    I have the fastest racehorse in the county. Why, just last week she was racing, three lengths ahead, when she stopped in the middle of the racetrack, and gave birth to a foal! Why, what an amazing story. It’s a pity you lost the race. What do you mean, lost? She won! That’s incredible! That’s nothing – the foal came in second!   The post I have the fastest racehorse in the county appeared first on Best Clean Funny Jokes.
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    Points in Case - Enlightening and Irreverent Comedy

  • Driving Etiquette for the Future

    Nick Hilbourn
    3 Mar 2015 | 6:29 am
    Article by Nick Hilbourn Hello reader. Nick Hilbourn here. Like you, I'm a concerned driver. Like you, I abide by federal rules and regulations on the road when it doesn't interfere with my own personal freedom and liberty. Like you, I wrote a Marxist interpretation of the New York State Department's Driver's Handbook for my senior thesis (pending approval). Like you, I'm also highly upset by all the new stop signs they put up in town. It seems there's one at every intersection. Let me be honest: I've been out of the driving game for a while. My license was revoked in 2001 after seventeen…
  • How Officer John McClane's Recklessness Nearly Ruined Our Family

    Peter Breining
    1 Mar 2015 | 6:20 am
    Article by Peter Breining On Christmas Eve 1988, Heinrich Von Hagen, a 38-year old German-born vibrational spectroscopy specialist was gunned down by a police officer in Downtown Los Angeles. Once the recipient of the Fritz Haber Medal of Excellence in chemical engineering, Heinrich was called many things in the weeks following his untimely death. Some called him a thief. Others, a terrorist. Some even went so far as to refer to the MIT educated chemist as a cold-blooded killer. I simply knew him as Dad. My father, described as "a didactic man with a kind heart," was the first…
  • What If... Whatever

    Charles Hartley
    27 Feb 2015 | 6:12 am
    Article by Charles Hartley What if you could be anyone in the world starting now other than your cool self? Who would you want to be? Would it someone you are jealousy of? Desirous of? Confused by? Fixated on? What if you wanted to be me? That would be weird. What if I wanted to be you?What if you could climb Mount Everest this afternoon with your bare hands? Would you do it? Would you want to? Why or why not? Would you attempt this knowing you were probably going to fall and die, freeze and die, or starve and die? Would any of this matter to anyone anywhere? What if the answer is no? Go do…
  • Is Your Chicken Tired?

    Paul Hardie
    25 Feb 2015 | 6:03 am
    Article by Paul Hardie "You should always let your meat rest after it's been cooked," they say. That's what she said!Last weekend, I pulled a golden brown free range chicken off the BBQ for our dinner guests and my wife said, "You can't cut it now. Leave it for a bit, it has to rest."Every time I cook some meat, I want to tear into it right away. Preferably the way my ancestors did, with fingernails and teeth, not knives and forks."Don't open the oven door, my chicken is on vacation. It needs the rest."Isn't it me that should get some rest? I'm the one turning on…
  • Dante's eFerno: The 9 Levels of Internet Hell for Social Media Sinners

    Tim Sullivan
    23 Feb 2015 | 5:13 am
    Article by Tim Sullivan Listen up, you who have wandered from the straight and narrow of the internet: follow me and I will show you the hell that awaits those who misuse the great social networks. Heed my warnings, for the fate of these wretches will be your own if you do not cease your wicked ways. (Note: you won't find any cyber bullies or their ilk here. They get sent on to real hell. No one wants those jerks around.)Down we go on the tour... Level 1 - Clickbait VictimsObserve the woeful denizens of the first level of Internet Hell. In life, these people were lured by the siren call of…
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    Really Funny Jokes

  • Want to marry again

    Mitesh Asher
    19 Feb 2015 | 3:51 am
    Mary Jane says to her lawyer, "I wanna get married to my ex-husband. How can you help me?"Her lawyer says, "But Mary, it was only last month that you got divorced. Don't tell me you are in love with him again!" Mary Jane replied, "Love, my foot! He seems to be very happy after the divorce and I am not able to bear it!!"
  • My client is not guilty

    Mitesh Asher
    18 Feb 2015 | 2:40 am
    Donald's wife was missing and everyone including his brother-in-law accused him of murder. The case went to court. The body could not be found and the case was getting complicated.There were several witnesses who were called to testify. Almost everyone spoke about the constant fights between the couple and the deadly threats that Donald had made.Seeing the case getting weaker & weaker for his client, Donald's lawyer, Simmons declared in the court, "I have an announcement to make. Please draw your attention to the door on the right. The woman who is presumed dead will walk in through that…
  • Valentine's Day jokes-Little Neil

    Mitesh Asher
    14 Feb 2015 | 12:01 am
    Neil was just 3 years old when Valentine's Day came along. Knowing how much his mother Sue loved chocolates, he and his dad Peter gifted here a choco box with the shape of a heart.Next morning, Neil could not help but eye the choco box hoping that he could get a piece to eat. As he touched one of the pieces, Sue said to him, "If you touch it, you got to eat it."Neil's eyes lit up and he tapped all the chocos in the box and said, "I will have to eat 'em all now!"
  • The punk

    Mitesh Asher
    6 Feb 2015 | 4:58 am
    Dan entered the Metro and immediately attracted attention. His hair was spiked and was dyed pink and blue. His clothes were torn. He was wearing his jeans way below the waist. He had a nose ring and several earrings. There were big feathers attached to a bandana that he was sporting.Dan took a seat across from an old fella who keeps staring at him for a long time.Agitated, Dan said, "What are you staring at, you old geezer, did you never do anythin wild in your youth?"The old guy shot back, "Of course I did. I was on a sales trip to Bangkok and I did it to a parrot once. Looks like you are my…
  • Fussy customer

    Mitesh Asher
    4 Feb 2015 | 12:01 am
    Mrs. Robbins, known to be extremely fussy, goes to D-Mart to buy some fresh fruits.She says to the girl behind the counter, "I want three kilos of pears. Kindly wrap each pear separately in plastic. The girl behind the counter silently fulfills the customer's demand.The lady then checks some apples and says to the girl behind the counter, "I would also like to take 2 kilos of fresh apples. Please pack each apple separately in plastic."Irritated, yet composed, the girl behind the counter obliges Mrs. Robbins again.Mrs. Robbins, pointing her finger towards a basket inquires, "And what is there…
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    Sher Bailey

  • My Toxic Mold Illness: the last post

    8 Feb 2015 | 9:36 am
    First of all, thank you to everyone who has been so sweet to me. You’ve shared your own stories of being sick, or of your child, Mother, brother, husband, and you’ve encouraged me to keep going even when I don’t want to. I love you. I’m blown away by your sweet spirits. To those of you who’ve called me stupid, or liar, or dumbass, or ignorant, or a dumb f**k, I hear you, too. I’m not going to pretend it doesn’t hurt my feelings. It does. That’s what you were hoping for, right? You’re welcome. Here’s what’s happened since I went…
  • How to Talk to Your Doctor About Mycotoxins

    14 Jan 2015 | 9:16 am
    So many people have told me they aren’t sure what to say to their doctor in order to be tested for Mycotoxins. I decided maybe the best way to offer that information is by creating something you can print. I created a very plain and simple PDF document you can print at home and take to your doctor. It has all the information they will need to order a test, as well as links to Dr. Joseph Brewer’s research. In the Facebook group there are lots of people who are asking some variation of the same question, “But, what if my doctor says no or laughs at me?” That’s so…
  • Black Mold Symptoms v. Fibromyalgia

    14 Jan 2015 | 7:34 am
    Since I wrote the post It’s Not Fibromyalgia, I have been humbled by the many thousands of people who are reading. I received so many emails, I couldn’t answer them all and decided to create a small Facebook group thinking I would have a better chance at responding to everyone there. That little Facebook group? It is at 950 members this morning in under 48 hours. (You can join by clicking here.) I still can’t get to everyone’s questions. The great news is that it has immediately become a community of people who are helping each other, responding to each other and…
  • Your Black Mold Questions Answered

    12 Jan 2015 | 3:49 pm
    I never imagined how many emails and comments I would receive from people who are ill, or who are caring for someone who is ill, and want to know more about my black mold illness. I need you to know I’ve read every single one and my heart hurts for those of you who are sick. I will respond to your emails just as quickly as I can. I haven’t forgotten about you. Before I go any further, I decided to create a place where each of you who wants can come and ask questions, share the story of your own health/illness, and feel heard. If you want to join me in the Facebook group: Black…
  • Men Shit: the post about sex dryers

    8 Jan 2015 | 5:53 pm
    Here’s something:  I think women (generally speaking) expect men to read their minds. You’ve heard this before? Now you get to hear it again. We know how our own minds work and even though we figured out that males are different than females the first time we saw little Billy sling a booger at his friend, we refuse to accept it. If you want to be a divorced woman, I encourage you to continue ignoring this fact. Trust me. The number one cause of divorce is not money or affairs or wet towels on the floor. It’s telepathic deafness. (Which, not for nothing, would also…
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    The Last King Of Shambhala

  • Episode #22 of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic): Rush Hour in the City ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    27 Feb 2015 | 7:12 pm
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. New to this webcomic?  So you're not completely lost, a good place to catch up is... here.If you like that, then check out the Xmas Special... here.And if you like that, you can use this online time machine and go back to the very start... here. ----------------------------------------------------- Fun fact: Wally (or Waldo), from Where's Wally fame,
  • Superhero Soap Opera Episode 5: Batman's Hammers of Justice Reconcile his Wild Heart

    Daniel Newton
    24 Feb 2015 | 2:40 pm
    This week, Bruce Wayne (Batman) confronts Selina Kyle (Catwoman) about her criminal past. These DC Comics fan fiction videos are being used for relationship education purposes. They are not for profit and have no affiliation with DC Comics. Click here to see last week's episode... Click here to get the relationship rundown from Anabel, a professional relationship strategist and mediator...See
  • Episode #21 of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic): Sin sees Selena in her Sleep ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    20 Feb 2015 | 5:39 am
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. New to this webcomic?  A good a place to catch up is... here.If you like that, then check out the Xmas Special... here.And if you like that, you can go back to the crazy place I like to call the start... here. Want to skip to the next episode? Click here. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Warning: Do not read type this tiny,
  • Superhero Soap Opera Episode 4: When Superhero Couples Talk Babies

    Daniel Newton
    17 Feb 2015 | 4:45 pm
    A bit more fan fiction fun!  This week, Clark Kent (Superman) and Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) talk about having a super baby, and conflict arises as each believe the other should be a certain way. These videos are being used for relationship education purposes. Click here to see last week's episode... Click here to get the relationship rundown from Anabel, a professional relationship
  • Episode #20 of Freaky Freaky Fridays (Web Comic): Giant Chibi Cat vs. FS Robot ... by Daniel Grant Newton

    Daniel Newton
    13 Feb 2015 | 12:59 am
    Missed last week's episode?  Click here. New to this webcomic?  A good a place to catch up is... here.If you like that, then check out the Xmas Special... here.And if you like that, you can go back to the crazy place I like to call the start... here. Or go to next episode... here. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Hey Friday Freakster!   Hope you've had an
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  • Diary of Irresponsible Government

    Fenris Badwulf
    4 Mar 2015 | 7:32 am
    I was talking to some people in the laundry room in the apartment I live in. They are nice people. Both work in government, have great high paying, high pensioned jobs, and a short commute down the subway line from home to office. As far as commuting goes, they only need to be in the office for meetings. They do their work from home; they have a home office which they use as a tax write off. They grumble about commuting, a bit. It is awkward to reschedule meetings around their vacations, days off, and preferred commuting time. Meetings should start some time after ten thirty, and be over by…
  • Twaveling Awound The World

    The Mayor
    3 Mar 2015 | 5:40 am
    Although the title of this segment is rather soft, The Mayor promises you that the actual meat of this post will be much less soft. That’s right, it will be MUCH less soft. As in harder. Stiffer. Harder and stiffer and much less soft. The Mayor and Fenris started this blog about ten years ago. At the time, it was an outlet to scream and rant and let off steam. Mostly though, it was a place where The Mayor could go and type a bunch of nonsense, not taking himself too seriously, posting assorted crap that made him feel good. Somewhere along the line The Mayor got serious (or more…
  • Burger Butt Gets A Beatin’

    The Mayor
    27 Feb 2015 | 10:40 am
    If anything can be taken away from the following story, it’s that you should always look at your chair before sitting down: Atlanta Police are investigating a brutal attack of a woman who says her two best friends turned on her and beat her for nearly two hours. “She grabbed me off the couch and started hitting me,” said Myriah Pointer, 23. Pointer was still bruised on Thursday, and she said she was still shaken from what happened to her last Saturday night. She says what started as a night of drinking with her two best friends turned into a nightmare. She says her friends…
  • Diary of Irresponsible Government

    Fenris Badwulf
    22 Feb 2015 | 5:25 pm
    You can learn a lot about life from foreign movies.
  • The Problem of World Hunger

    Fenris Badwulf
    22 Feb 2015 | 1:08 pm
    The poor starving creatures of Toronto. My heart bleeds, and the tears gush down my face. I can hardly bear to type. O, Woe. A generous reader of this blog has donated a garbage truck of restaurant waste for the growing Mitchieville Save the Toronto Seagull movement. I am confident that our plans to have more seagulls reach breeding season this year will occur. Thanks to the ongoing effort of the Mitchieville Toronto Seagull Refuge tens of thousands of seagulls will survive the harsh Toronto climate. Now, thanks to this angel, the protected seagull flocks can enjoy a mid winter gorging;…
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    Fair City News

  • Mike The Intern
    10 Feb 2015 | 9:39 am
    104.7′s Mike the Intern Well it’s that time of year again. Love is in the air whether you like it or not. And to either help you with that or make you even more frustrated with this time of the year, here is a great list of some of the cheesiest love songs you will find. Poison “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” This song is proof that even the most rockin’ dude has feelings too. It is also a warning that you shouldn’t try and have a relationship with a stripper. Def Leppard “Love Bites” Yes love does bite. And someone should tell it not to. Whitesnake “Is This…
  • Local Senior Wondering When Dillons Will Be Open
    22 Jan 2015 | 5:27 am
    Dab-nabbin’ Dillons still not open Springfield, MO – Local senior Nancy Newman once again drove her 1994 Buick Regal through the parking lot of the old Dillons on West Kearney wondering when exactly the long time grocery chain would be open again. “I’ve been coming every day since December 24 trying to buy my Metamucil and soap opera digest magazines.” said the local senior. “I guess these kids took a longer winter break. They’re probably busy Facegoogling or Instatwiting.” Mrs. Newman’s car has apparently circled the deserted lot every afternoon at 12:30, the left…
  • KHS Unveils New Cafeteria & Mascot Name: Poochies
    13 Jan 2015 | 6:53 am
    Fear the Poochies! Springfield, MO – Recent renovations revealed a new gathering space and new rally cry for the Chiefs of Kickapoo High School: Poochies was released as a new catch-phrase during the cafeteria grand opening and several students and alumni are mixed on the subliminal announcement. “I mean ‘poochie’ is a term of endearment but I don’t think it is a very fierce thing to scream at a sporting event,” said ’94 alumni Chas Piffer, “I do think it is an evolution of ‘fear the poo’ which plays upon one’s fear of touching another person’s feces. Especially a…
  • Fail Sign – January
    12 Jan 2015 | 5:51 am
  • ________ _________ _____________ ______
    8 Jan 2015 | 5:48 am
    ____ ____ _____ ______ Springfield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…
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    Noise to Signal

  • Thank you for updating! A new critical update is available.

    8 Feb 2015 | 7:53 pm
    I figure this one will strike a chord in anyone who uses Netflix on a desktop computer. For everyone else, there’s this version: I drew this on the iPad using Procreate’s pencil tools—so kind of a first. Hence the change in style, in case you were wondering. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
  • It’s alive! Aliiiiiiiiiive!

    29 Jan 2015 | 10:51 am
    Today’s cartoon was sparked (heh) when I learned about a new project supporting citizen science (and the professional kind, too): Banu. Founder Rastin Mehr‘s idea is to let anyone make their raw scientific data available online. Once it’s uploaded, others can access it using an API through a Creative Commons license. I’m fascinated by the rapidly emerging field of citizen science. Turning to the crowd for help with research, data collection and analysis doesn’t just make new resources available to the scientific community; it can build a larger, better informed…
  • Dewey

    31 Dec 2014 | 6:06 pm
    I drew (well, wrote) this right after walking the book spiral in the Seattle Public Library’s Central Library. If you’ve never been, and you find yourself in Seattle, go—it’s an architectural marvel. By the way, 2999.9 is reserved for authors other than Ann Coulter and Glenn Beck, should that be necessary. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
  • You HAD to get a breeding pair.

    24 Dec 2014 | 8:10 pm
    Instead of hoisting glasses of egg nog or ordering in Chinese food, I made you a cartoon. Happy holidays. Wondering why your family was the freakish one that didn’t raise you with the Elf on the Shelf™ family tradition™? Turns out it dates all the way back to… 2005. I think the damn thing’s creepy as hell (Santa’s agent spying on you on behalf of the North Pole Stasi!) and doubly so now that it’s been extended to children’s birthdays. And I’m in no way reassured by the Mensch on a Bench. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way…
  • The reason for the season

    21 Dec 2014 | 7:48 pm
    (In case this cartoon is baffling.) If I don’t talk to you lovely folks before January 1st, happy holidays and a terrific, bug-free new year to all. See more cartoons about social media, business and the way we live and work online at Noise to Signal Cartoon
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    Iced Borscht » Iced Borscht

  • Lying is Good

    10 Feb 2015 | 1:10 pm
    An interesting read from the NYT on the importance of lying to the one you love. Excerpt: Love is a greater good than the truth. No marriage, no parent’s love of a child should be scrutinized like a pathologist examining his cadaver. Save your ruthless pursuit of the truth for the laboratory; we lovers would rather be like Shakespeare: “Therefore I lie with her and she with me / And in our faults by lies we flatter’d be.” Don’t worry so much about ferreting out the truth. Take care of each other instead.
  • A Former Marine Discusses Trauma

    9 Feb 2015 | 2:27 pm
    Excellent post here from Chris Hernandez,  who apparently is “a former Marine, currently serving National Guard soldier, longtime cop, OIF and OEF vet, author, and blogger,”  regarding our culture’s over-use of the term “trauma.” He writes: While I mean this in the nicest way possible, I don’t want victims of microaggressions or supporters of trigger warnings to doubt my sincerity. Fuck your trauma. Yes, fuck your trauma. My sympathy for your suffering, whether that suffering was real or imaginary, evaporated when you demanded I change my life to avoid…
  • Avvakum the Archpriest is My Spirit Guide

    9 Feb 2015 | 1:29 pm
    I’d like to apply the worldview of Avvakum the Archpriest to all components of my life, starting now. Please join me, and begin with this quote: “Are your eunuchs fanning you to keep the flies from biting the great sovereign? And when you shit, do you wipe your bottom with that hellfire? The Holy Spirit tells me … there’s no need to shit away what you’ve eaten since the worms are slowly eating the great sovereign himself … into the bowels of the earth with you, son of a bitch!” h/t Daniel Kalder
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    12 Most

  • 12 Most Powerful Tips for Visual Dominance

    Ashley Faulkes
    10 Feb 2015 | 6:00 am
    12 Most HE6TKNU4H59Q By Ashley Faulkes As the internet and technology take on bigger roles in our lives, what people love to read, watch, share and promote changes. People have far less time and are expecting, or should we say demanding, more visual ways of digesting information and sharing it online, mostly in the form of social media. Images […]
  • 12 Most Obvious Signs You Are Watching Too Much Toddler Television

    Susan Maccarelli
    13 Oct 2014 | 6:00 am
    12 Most HE6TKNU4H59Q By Susan Maccarelli   Do you announce bath time using the following song “Let’s take a bath. A lovely bubbly bath,” a la the Disney Channel? Then this 12 Most post is for you! You’ll know it’s time to put away the remote and head for nap time if you relate to these signs that […]
  • 12 Most Irritating Things to Say to a Single Person

    Sophie Fox
    7 Oct 2014 | 6:00 am
    12 Most HE6TKNU4H59Q By Sophie Fox   It’s official: there are more single people than ever before, 124.6 million single Americans in August 2014. This is more than half of the adult population. The figures are similar here in the UK. In spite of this, there are still a few of you happy couples who have yet to […]
  • 12 Most Timely Questions to Ask When You Have a New Job

    Kelly Belmonte
    6 Oct 2014 | 6:00 am
    12 Most HE6TKNU4H59Q By Kelly Belmonte   It used to be the case that you had about 90 days to get “up to speed” and begin adding value at a new job. The expectations were relatively low that you would or could be able to competently do your job before that point. Times have changed. The need to […]
  • 12 Most Honest Reasons to Lie When Interviewers Ask Your Current Salary

    Eric Butts
    30 Sep 2014 | 6:00 am
    12 Most HE6TKNU4H59Q By Eric Butts   What’s the key to a successful salary negotiation? If your answer isn’t “lying,” then you’re doing it wrong. It sounds harsh, but it’s a cold world out there in the business world. One of my mentors made a general comment to me about working for a company you don’t own: “If […]
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    Humor Volcano RSS Feed

  • Nun Has Orgasm During Beaver TSA Pat-Down

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:55 am
    The TSA's new anti-terrorist screenings now require more invasive hands-on pat-downs. Such extensive physical contact, particularly upon little old ladies, has led to increasing instances of surprise sexual orgasm, especially among nuns. [Satire]
  • New Workplace Scream Room® A Huge Stress-Busting Success

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:55 am
    Researchers recently proved that loud cursing reduces stress. Taking full advantage, a new soundproof Workplace Scream Room, where angry employees can safely vent in complete privacy, has just been launched. [Satire]
  • Obscene College Football Halftime Show Shocks Nation

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:55 am
    The entire nation is shocked when, for its director's ultimate act of revenge, a marching band performs a choreographed halftime routine showing a huge penis masturbating onto the face of the rival team's mascot. [Satire]
  • Christine O'Donnell Bloodies Delaware Democrat On Election Eve

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:55 am
    A Delaware Democratic Party resident was left a bloody, dazed mess after a U.S.Senate candidate Christine O'Donnell-inflicted injury as he reached into his mailbox on this 2010 mid-term election eve. [Satire]
  • Mobsters Behind 2010 Dallas Cowboys Embarrassment?

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:55 am
    Due to the horrid Dallas Cowboys football season thus far, the only happy people in Texas this fall are in the brown paper bag industry. They're so wildly successful, in fact, that the Mob is suspected to be intimately involved throughout. [Satire]
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    Krapsody - the place to find out of the ordinary humor.

  • Live Long and Shake Yo Booty

    2 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    RIP Leonard Nimoy 03/26/1931 - 02/27/2015 [Read Full Story]
  • RIP Kenny Loggins

    26 Feb 2015 | 8:00 am
    [Read Full Story]
  • The Grapes of Confusion

    8 Jan 2015 | 8:00 am
    | Jan. 08, 2015 If confusion is the door that wisdom comes through then what the hell is this? Just so there's no confusion, prepare to be confused. Continue reading for information that will completely blow your mind, but may ultimately frighten you and send you back to your regular routines. May... [Read Full Story]
  • 5 Reasons Jean Claude Van Damme's Mullet is the Greatest Actor in the History of Cinema

    11 Dec 2014 | 8:00 am
    | Dec. 11, 2014 Let's just get this straight. Forget his flexibility, Van Damme had THE best mullet ever. His mullet might be the only time a mullet has been successfully pulled off in the history of cinema. Look at Hard Target. Why, if it weren't for Van Damme's mullet the film would have no... [Read Full Story]
  • Go Ahead, Meme Me

    20 Nov 2014 | 9:00 am
    | Nov. 20, 2014 "1,478,954,217,389 allegations of rape? Have another pudding pop. Zipzopzubittybop!" - Bill Cosby (sources: childhood ruined -- *sobs uncontrollably) [Read Full Story]
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    Thoughts From Paris - True Stories - Funny Blog | RSS Feed

  • Low Self-Esteem is Pretty Great, Actually!

    D.J. Paris
    28 Feb 2015 | 3:30 pm
    Yes, I’m about to ease your suffering. Prepare yourself. Nobody ever talks about the advantage of low self-esteem. The best part of thinking that you’re a piece of subhuman garbage is that you learn how to obtain validation from others. Sure, it’ll land you in therapy after twenty or thirty years when you suffer a nervous breakdown, but there’s some benefit along the way. I’m often described as likable and cheery. I learned that when you’re likeable and cheery, people (especially strangers) prefer that over prickly-types. Nobody idolizes the jerk who…
  • Bloggers are Weird Podcast – Nicole Leigh Shaw – The Importance of Conferences

    D.J. Paris
    22 Feb 2015 | 10:01 am
    If you’re not attending blog conferences and you blog, Nicole Leigh Shaw is about to change your mind. In it we discuss her conference BlogU and why you should attend this summer. Also, she’s a great writer and talks about getting published online and in anthologies. Read her blog here! How to listen… iTunes Podcast App on Mobile Device (just search for Bloggers are Weird) YouTube below (if you’re using my app, click to youtube section)
  • The ThoughtsFromParis 2014 Holiday Card

    D.J. Paris
    17 Jan 2015 | 2:32 pm
    Every year I find holiday cards both exciting and disappointing. First, it’s validating to know that someone took the time to write out my address. I’m bummed that most only send picture cards without messages. Reading somebody’s handwriting feels more intimate. Especially if there’s something in there that’s personal. Many years ago when I was dealing with divorce I wrote a paragraph on each card. I wanted to express the importance of their support during that difficult time. I remember crying through most of it and with one card I literally cried onto the card…
  • Bloggers are Weird Podcast – Kate Hall – Can I Get Another Bottle of Whine?

    D.J. Paris
    6 Jan 2015 | 7:28 am
    Blogger and author Kate Hall talks about her new book, how she got it done in two months, and how she built up a base of over 30k followers for her hilarious blog. Go buy her book now! -> How to listen…  iTunes Official ThoughtsFromParis app for Apple or Android devices! YouTube below (if you’re using my app, click to youtube section)
  • What the Hell, Let’s Get Back to It

    D.J. Paris
    25 Aug 2014 | 7:30 pm
    It’s amazing how quickly I lost the willingness to write. In 2012 I challenged myself to write every day for a year. The first month was trying but after that I became proficient. My mind started searching during the day for topics to write later. I’d be riding the subway and an idea would hit and I start typing furiously on my phone. Now I just listen to Howard Stern. At home I write a few Twitter jokes and then to bed. I’ve noticed over the past few years doing less and less of the things I used to enjoy. I rode my bike to work for years and then abruptly stopped last…
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    Really Funny Jokes

  • Want to marry again

    Mitesh Asher
    19 Feb 2015 | 3:51 am
    Mary Jane says to her lawyer, "I wanna get married to my ex-husband. How can you help me?"Her lawyer says, "But Mary, it was only last month that you got divorced. Don't tell me you are in love with him again!" Mary Jane replied, "Love, my foot! He seems to be very happy after the divorce and I am not able to bear it!!"
  • My client is not guilty

    Mitesh Asher
    18 Feb 2015 | 2:40 am
    Donald's wife was missing and everyone including his brother-in-law accused him of murder. The case went to court. The body could not be found and the case was getting complicated.There were several witnesses who were called to testify. Almost everyone spoke about the constant fights between the couple and the deadly threats that Donald had made.Seeing the case getting weaker & weaker for his client, Donald's lawyer, Simmons declared in the court, "I have an announcement to make. Please draw your attention to the door on the right. The woman who is presumed dead will walk in through that…
  • Valentine's Day jokes-Little Neil

    Mitesh Asher
    14 Feb 2015 | 12:01 am
    Neil was just 3 years old when Valentine's Day came along. Knowing how much his mother Sue loved chocolates, he and his dad Peter gifted here a choco box with the shape of a heart.Next morning, Neil could not help but eye the choco box hoping that he could get a piece to eat. As he touched one of the pieces, Sue said to him, "If you touch it, you got to eat it."Neil's eyes lit up and he tapped all the chocos in the box and said, "I will have to eat 'em all now!"
  • The punk

    Mitesh Asher
    6 Feb 2015 | 4:58 am
    Dan entered the Metro and immediately attracted attention. His hair was spiked and was dyed pink and blue. His clothes were torn. He was wearing his jeans way below the waist. He had a nose ring and several earrings. There were big feathers attached to a bandana that he was sporting.Dan took a seat across from an old fella who keeps staring at him for a long time.Agitated, Dan said, "What are you staring at, you old geezer, did you never do anythin wild in your youth?"The old guy shot back, "Of course I did. I was on a sales trip to Bangkok and I did it to a parrot once. Looks like you are my…
  • Fussy customer

    Mitesh Asher
    4 Feb 2015 | 12:01 am
    Mrs. Robbins, known to be extremely fussy, goes to D-Mart to buy some fresh fruits.She says to the girl behind the counter, "I want three kilos of pears. Kindly wrap each pear separately in plastic. The girl behind the counter silently fulfills the customer's demand.The lady then checks some apples and says to the girl behind the counter, "I would also like to take 2 kilos of fresh apples. Please pack each apple separately in plastic."Irritated, yet composed, the girl behind the counter obliges Mrs. Robbins again.Mrs. Robbins, pointing her finger towards a basket inquires, "And what is there…
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  • Tired of hard-core sex scenes in every story? blog
    10 Feb 2015 | 7:29 am
     Humans instinctively feel a need for  privacy when sex is involved.  Hell, we don't even like to talk about it.  Maybe its due to our evolution.  We started with TV couples like Desi and Lucy sleeping in double beds to explicit sex on most films and TV series. Most  find ourselves fast forwarding scene after scene. Poor actresses having to do this!  After all, they need the  job. "The Sex Scene," Shut the damn door! Isn't imagination what movies are all about? Let's get to the story. Don't get me wrong, if the movie is "50 shades of  Grey" then I…
  • Into the woods... Are you afraid? blog
    8 Feb 2015 | 7:43 am
    Are we becoming afraid of the woods? Have you noticed that every time there are woods involved in a movie, there is usually some terror lurking?  Its doing the same thing to us as "Jaws" did with the ocean; It's made us fear nature. It makes the dimwitted humans afraid of their own yard. Any natural darkness should be obliterated at once. A backyard is often just a dry patch of dirt with that anemic tree and the grass cut to one inch of its life. Birds need shelter, a bush or tree to hide nearby, worms.  A feeder without water nearby is just not enough. Lets get to it humans!
  • Home Decor: Why not make your home a sanctuary? blog
    22 Jan 2015 | 10:46 am
    Not everyone is lucky enough to own a cabin in the woods.  When we see those gorgeous homes with wooden beam ceilings and a fire going, it looks just like heaven.  But its okay.   We can still make our own sanctuary.  Even if we live in a penthouse studio, we can still have the sensation that we live close to the earth. We all know Ralph Lauren.  He is the epitome of style and country manor chic. But did you know that his name was Ralph Lifshitz?  He was not born rich. In fact he was born in the Bronx in poor surroundings. Did he let that bleak reality stop…
  • Let's Kick the Can blog
    14 Jan 2015 | 1:24 pm
    Your body might deteriorate a bit, but your soul never has to. Remember that classic Twilight Zone episode, "Kick the Can?"   Its about residents in a nursing home that were resigned to just hang around till they dropped dead.  Kind of like some of us. Anyhoo, one of them had an inspiration.  Actually the old guy got a hell of a spiritual insight. He does not dismiss it either, like most of us. Not this old guy; he went with it. In  a flash he realizes that if they would all just move around for the sake of pure pleasure; that the carefree feeling of…
  • Walt Disney World what have they done to you? blog
    5 Jan 2015 | 11:33 am
    Walt Disney World is fast- pass losing its pixie dust magic. I've always loved Walt Disney World. But I have to admit that great greed is ruining the loved Disney vibe of what used to be a premium experience. Some folks don't even realize it.  After all, the Disney corp has geniuses in their public relations department.   It takes brilliance to come up with the Fast Pass.   This system that makes us work for something that we have already paid for.  Then we blame ourselves if we don't get it.  Maybe we just didn't reserve with enough…
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    Now That's Nifty

  • Distractify - School Lunch Around the World

    12 Feb 2015 | 1:54 pm
    Distractify has some school lunches from around the world. Italy looks great. About 32 million children in the US eat cafeteria school lunches every day. As a nation with a childhood obesity... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Funny Valentines Ad

    29 Jan 2015 | 8:59 am
    Check out this funny Valentines Day ad. I wish I was creative like this. Also, what are the chances that Jodie and Alex are still together? Slim? Via ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Natural Flavoring - Castoreum

    26 Jan 2015 | 3:32 pm
    So I was pretty skeptical at first. But, sure enough, Castoreum is indeed from beaver butts, and it is indeed used in food. See here: Beaver Butts Emit Goo Used for Vanilla Flavoring. ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • What Ever Happened to Scotty Smalls from Sandlot? - Tom Guiry

    14 Jan 2015 | 10:51 am
    Tom Guiry played Scotty Smalls in the movie Sandlot. But whatever happened to him? Filmography: Guiry's first rule was Scotty Smalls in Sandlot when he was 11. This led to other films such... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
  • Rolling House - Roll It

    6 Jan 2015 | 11:27 am
    Roll It, a cool experimental house, resulted from the collaboration among different institutes within the University of Karlsruhe. This cylindrical design is a modular prototype that provides... ***This is a content summary only. Visit Now That's Nifty for full links, other content, and more.***
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    mark a rayner

  • The wonderful thing about tautologies

    3 Mar 2015 | 8:07 am
    damned freaks in the alley…, a photo by IntangibleArts on Flickr. He’d started the usual way: he burst through the door, landing on the nearest (and fattest) person, introduced himself, and then sang the song. (He’d paid the Sherman Brothers a fortune for it, so he sang it at every opportunity. And he enjoyed the […]
  • Tundra Reports: Tim Horton’s Honeys

    2 Mar 2015 | 4:09 am
    By Dr. Maximilian Tundra Does anyone else find it mildly disturbing to be addressed as “dear”, “hon,” or “darling” by someone who is at least 10 years younger than you? I have noticed over the past few years that Tim Horton’s has been hiring more young servers, and they have strangely taken on some of […]
  • It’s morning in the Singularity

    Mark A. Rayner
    20 Feb 2015 | 4:02 am
    Bob was not a happy cyborg. He’d had to skip is plasma bath and neural detox that morning because his dick of a boss, a narcissistic self-sustaining photosynthetic artificial intelligence named TODD-bot, needed him to come to work early. And he was late. (Clearly his autonomic clock was in need of some debugging.) But the […]
  • La dolce vita

    Mark A. Rayner
    18 Feb 2015 | 4:32 am
    It wasn’t always so easy. There used to be an anger in him. An emptiness that nothing could fill … nothing material anyway. He fell through time and space, and into a kind of dream. And it seemed as though an age passed him by, the stars streaming through the sky as though he watched […]
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    Chandra Clarke

  • Please Don’t Have A Cow

    Chandra Clarke
    2 Mar 2015 | 2:33 am
    Chandra Clarke Once, pot-bellied pigs were all the rage. After that craze died down, iguanas became extremely trendy. And of course, black and white dogs always become popular when Disney revives the 101 Dalmatians franchise. This year, the hot new pet might be: the mini-cow. No, it’s not a new toy robot out of Japan, it’s a […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Stop being a martyr

    Chandra Clarke
    21 Feb 2015 | 7:52 am
    Chandra Clarke I recently had the good fortune to have lunch with some very successful women. We talked business and politics, and inevitably, as we all warmed up to one another, the conversation turned to romantic partners, family, and kids. I didn’t say so at the time, but the conversation really surprised me. Here I was with […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Doing Your Homework

    Chandra Clarke
    7 Feb 2015 | 7:31 am
    Chandra Clarke Unless you are Japanese, you probably missed it — last week was Beloved Wives Day. The brainchild of the fledgling Japan Doting Husband Association, it is a day designed to make husbands appreciate their wives more. In a country where most men are workaholics, the association suggests that husbands come home early (8 p.m.!) and do […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • The best of all possible worlds

    Chandra Clarke
    19 Jan 2015 | 6:51 am
    Chandra Clarke Theoretical physicists have many ideas about how the cosmos came to be, but one of the most popular ones is the one which says that are an infinite number of universes, each of them different. There is, for example, our universe, another one where all your missing socks go, and one for your car keys. […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
  • Green eggs and sp…

    Chandra Clarke
    5 Jan 2015 | 6:51 am
    Chandra Clarke Earlier this week, I left my computer unattended for nearly 24 hours. When I later logged into my email account, I expected to hear that annoyingly cheerful guy say: “You’ve got mail!” What he actually said is: “You’ve got 2,309 emails. Don’t you ever clean out your inbox?” Okay, so 2,309 is a bit of […] Chandra Clarke - This material is safe for work. No really, it is.
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    Stuff You Couldn't Make Up

  • I Hate Russian Dolls

    27 Feb 2015 | 8:39 pm
    They are so full of themselves.   The post I Hate Russian Dolls appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • How Did You Even…

    20 Feb 2015 | 4:16 pm
    Driving level: expert! The post How Did You Even… appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • All You Need Is Love But a Little Chocolate

    Chad Fraser
    14 Feb 2015 | 8:44 pm
    All you need is love but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. How true! A day without chocolate lacks something, in my opinion! But love is definitely the greatest, most important thing of all. Happy Valentine’s Day from … Continue reading → The post All You Need Is Love But a Little Chocolate appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • Silence is Golden Unless You Have a Toddler

    Chad Fraser
    11 Feb 2015 | 9:05 am
    Silence is golden unless you have a toddler. In that case silence is very very suspicious! Ahh… that moment of satisfaction that comes from sitting down in peace with your favourite cup of tea or coffee. But then you realize, … Continue reading → The post Silence is Golden Unless You Have a Toddler appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
  • The Original Playstation

    Chad Fraser
    10 Feb 2015 | 11:15 pm
    Introducing the original Playstation! There is no denying that kids that get out in the fresh air and whose play involves lots of movement will grow up to be far healthier than the child that grows up indoors, in front … Continue reading → The post The Original Playstation appeared first on Stuff You Couldn't Make Up.
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    Love and Knuckles

  • Jared Leto and Karl Lagerfeld Are Joining My Posse

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:08 pm
    Dear Jared Leto and Karl Lagerfeld, I think the three of us should join forces and start a posse. We come from different worlds, but I think we have a common purpose and that is to bring attention to the strength of people with extremely pale skin, Princess Elsa hair, small heads, and resting bitch faces. We may not be able to sit for long periods in the sun, wear shoulder pads, or pretend we like country music, but we are strong. My mom always used to say that I looked like I was “mad at the world” and I can see the same in you also. It is not anger; it is just intense focus.
  • Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap: Let’s Talk About The Husband

    4 Mar 2015 | 10:44 am
    DINNER Kim had asked Lisa Rinna to drop discussion of her possible de-soberization on the private jet. She was still angry when she zipped up her leather jacket and met the other women for dinner. Yolanda, understanding the tension was mounting, asked that each woman go around the table and reveal something very personal about themselves. That way they could prove to viewers at home (and maybe to each other) that despite having incredible wealth, fame, and access to plastic surgeons, fancy clothes, and free jewelry that they were in fact not without struggle. For example, Yolanda’s…
  • The Bachelor Recap: Women Tell All

    3 Mar 2015 | 12:00 pm
    This is what I learned last night from watching The Bachelor: Women Tell All. The goal of each eliminated contestant for the evening is to look better than you did while taping the show, prove you were not in it for the television exposure, and stake your own claim for a position as the next Bachelorette. Bachelorette viewing parties are a woman’s version of the Superbowl. Throw in some grain alcohol and a surprise appearance by the actual Bachelor and you’ve got yourself a fiesta that no one will forget. Chris Harrison wears Mac-level foundation that is highly visible when he is…
  • In Honor Of Kathleen, Mourning The Death Of My Dear Friend

    2 Mar 2015 | 3:55 pm
    Last week one of my best friends from college passed away. Kathleen had been fighting an illness, which she chose to keep private, but doctors were confident she would make a full recovery. I had no idea she was sick when I received the news of her sudden passing. I have experienced the untimely death of a boyfriend, a close male friend, and a beloved uncle, but the death of a girlfriend feels so much more painful. Part of me feels like I’ve lost a sister because I have always thought of my friends as my family. I was looking forward to dancing with her at her wedding, but now I am…
  • A Letter To My Kids About My Pregnancy

    26 Feb 2015 | 8:11 am
    Dear Kids, As you know, I’m pregnant.         This would explain why I haven’t been myself lately. It is the reason I can’t stand the smell of milk and have a hard time keeping it together when I see commercials with dogs. It is the reason I have been eating Mexican almost every night and why I sometimes finish the entire pizza in the car before we get home.  You know why I have been spending so much time in the bathroom? It’s because my bladder feels like it is going to explode or I am going to barf.         It is the reason I…
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    The Idle Lord

  • Bradford Council & The Muppets – A Short Film.

    27 Feb 2015 | 3:32 am
    Some rich men came and raped the land, Nobody caught ‘em Put up a bunch of ugly boxes, and Jesus, people bought ‘em The Last Resort by The Eagles. With a predictable inevitability the morons supposedly in charge of our City voted to flatten a noble old building their votes soothed doubtless by a few […] Continue reading ... Bradford Council & The Muppets – A Short Film..
  • A Snip At Half The Price!

    23 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    {First published June 2012} Amazing what subjects are tackled in the local debating chamber. This week it was world population or more to the point, our combined inability to add any further to this; we were comparing our various experiences under the knife. Although it causes me great pain, here’s mine recounted – sorry Mum! […] Continue reading ... A Snip At Half The Price!.
  • The Changing Face of Bradford.

    20 Feb 2015 | 7:35 am
    The Council’s grand housing plan spanning 2015-30 is soon to be unveiled. Seeking to build 42,100 new houses at an average not far short of 3,000 per annum, this is a staggering figure; it suggests the district will be turned into a gridlocked building site for the next fifteen years. Behind all this is a […] Continue reading ... The Changing Face of Bradford..
  • A Morning At Muppet Hall

    18 Feb 2015 | 7:21 am
    This morning I observed Bradford Council’s Regulatory & Appeals Committee to support objections to proposals to flatten the old Hutton Middle School to make way for more Toy Town houses. As two precious hours of my life ebbed away, it was easy to conclude that my hometown is totally ****ed in the hands of the […] Continue reading ... A Morning At Muppet Hall.
  • Manners Ain’t Cheap.

    13 Feb 2015 | 7:57 am
    Look North featured a piece the other night on a recent “initiative” by Bradford NHS to blow £33k on teaching receptionists at doctors’ surgeries how to be polite. I am not making this up; in times when money is tighter than ever, some publicly-funded, brainless twerps have agreed that the only way to tame Rita […] Continue reading ... Manners Ain’t Cheap..
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    Barb Best

  • 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!

    Barb Best
    27 Feb 2015 | 7:00 am
      No kidding. 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe!      OOPS! I’m Not Breathing. Why Not? You May Ask… I forgot My damn bra is too tight I need an APP for that Too much in love Screw it, it’s a Snow Day No Post-It note that says “breathe!” Scared to death, no iPhone reception […] The post 25 Reasons I Can’t Breathe! appeared first on Barb Best.
  • 5 Absurd News Items You May Have Missed

    Barb Best
    21 Feb 2015 | 2:54 pm
      Do you find much of the news to be absurd? We live in a crazy world. We might as well laugh at the absurdity of it all. “Humor is our way of defending ourselves from life’s absurdities by thinking absurdly about them.” Lewis Mumford    5 gems from the news you may have missed […] The post 5 Absurd News Items You May Have Missed appeared first on Barb Best.
  • 7 Gratitude TIPS for the Grumpy

    Barb Best
    16 Feb 2015 | 4:37 pm
    Gratitude is where it’s at, dude.   If guilted sufficiently, even die-hard cranks and curmudgeons can occasionally muster enough oomph to express a grunt or two of gratitude. What are you grateful for? I’m grateful for Google Everything I know, knew, never knew, and can’t remember – I learned on Google. What I/you have googled […] The post 7 Gratitude TIPS for the Grumpy appeared first on Barb Best.
  • Be My FUNNY Valentine, will ya?

    Barb Best
    6 Feb 2015 | 12:22 pm
      Be my funny Valentine, will ya, pull-ease? Remember… Women crave men who have a BIG… sense of humor. Funny is sexy! +++ Valentine’s Day is an excellent occasion to demonstrate some self-love. Give yourself a hug. Indulge your senses. Treat yourself. The pressure is on!  Satisfy yourself! Need a quickie fun gift for YOU […] The post Be My FUNNY Valentine, will ya? appeared first on Barb Best.
  • 7 Survivor TIPS: I Feel Your Air Travel Pain

    Barb Best
    30 Jan 2015 | 6:00 am
        I feel your air travel pain! Flying is no longer the inspiring, sexy adventure it used to be. If one is flying coach nowadays (WHAT? You don’t own a Gulf Stream GV? Sorry to hear that…) one needs a survival plan.   Here are 7 Survivor TIPS Avoid all children, the elderly, and […] The post 7 Survivor TIPS: I Feel Your Air Travel Pain appeared first on Barb Best.
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    Amy Vansant - Humor

  • 5 Stages of Grief meets 50 Shades of Grey

    Amy Vansant
    17 Feb 2015 | 12:25 pm
    All writers dream of the kind of success enjoyed by 50 Shades of Grey. We agonize over our own books, tweaking and tinkering, knowing we’ll probably never make a cent for all our pain. Then, just as we’re doing cartwheels over selling two in the same day, someone comes along and sells a gazillion copies of a book about a girl who flushes and/or blushes 125 times, once “stars and stripes red.” Oh my. Oh jeeze. I used the phrase “snorted a laugh” twice in one of my novels and my editor almost died of apoplexy. But, no one wants to hear a bunch of poor,…
  • Blonde Pickup Sticks

    Amy Vansant
    11 Feb 2015 | 4:28 am
    I could try and blame it on the cold medicine I was taking at the time, but I think I skipped that day. Looking back on it, I realize now it was a willful act of defiance, and I got what I deserved. The Challenge: Two boxes of angel hair pasta; both half full, both opened. The open end of the bottom box was on the right. The box sitting on top of it was opened to the left. There were choices to be made. Sure, all I had to do was turn one of the boxes around and point both opened ends towards the sky. But, instead, I made a conscious decision not to do this. “I can pick both up and…
  • Bother-in-Law’s House of Horrors in Pennsyltucky

    Amy Vansant
    4 Feb 2015 | 4:00 am
    I am one of those lucky people who has in-laws they adore.  I get along fabulously with Gary, my “Bother-in-Law,” because he’s a big, loud-mouthed redneck. Big, loud-mouth rednecks are a TON of fun when they are yours. Other people’s loud-mouthed rednecks can be kind of scary, but having one of your own is awesome. I recommend picking up yourself one. We recently visited the Bother-in-Law for a belated Christmas exchange. I gave my nieces a health monitoring bracelet thingy and a skateboard, and they gave me the flu. Seems fair. Actually, to be fair, we were just…
  • And You Can Forget Vacation Sex

    Amy Vansant
    21 Jan 2015 | 3:21 am
    My husband and I, of course, never have sex. That would be disgusting. (Ok, that first line was in case anyone from my family reads this. We can continue.) There was a LOT of driving. My husband, Mike is, of course, the greatest lover of all time. (Ok, THAT line was for Mike. He definitely stopped reading after that, so we can continue… As soon as I stop laughing.) Over the holidays, Mike, Gordon Labradoodle and I took a three week vacation that included a week with his mother on the west coast of Florida, a week with my parents on the east coast of Florida, and then a week in Isle of…
  • New Romantic Comedy – Slightly Stalky

    Amy Vansant
    12 Jan 2015 | 6:32 am
    So for all the people who said, “Eh, you’re kind of funny, but what’s with the homicidal angels? Were you drunk when you wrote Angeli?” (and by people I mean my mother and mother-in-law… and by drunk the answer is ‘yes’) do I have a treat for you! A NEW Romantic Comedy! Based loosely on how I stalked my husband into submission. (WARNING: I’m not as hot as the cartoon version on the cover.) And as one of my loyal readers, if you’d like a FREE copy in exchange for your honest review (for a limited time) (limited time offer that is, not that…
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    Rubbish In, Robish Out!

  • Man Drives to Attorney’s Office With Dead Body in Truck

    Johnny Robish
    5 Mar 2015 | 6:24 pm
    Man Drives to Attorney’s Office With Dead Body in Truck:  Florida detectives are investigating the case of a man who said he shot his neighbor in self-defense during a scuffle involving a gun and then threw the dead body in the bed of his pickup truck and drove right over to his lawyer’s office.  Wow, seems some people will do almost anything to use the HOV lanes.  On a positive note, at least he drove to his lawyer and not a taxidermist.   Kim Kardashian’s Bizarre New Look:  Kim Kardashian raised a few eyebrows at Balmain’s show during the Paris Fashion Week when…
  • World’s Oldest Person Doesn’t Think 117 Years is That Long

    Johnny Robish
    4 Mar 2015 | 9:18 pm
    World’s Oldest Person Doesn’t Think 117 Years is That Long:  Misao Okawa, the world’s oldest person at 117, surprised everyone at her 117th birthday celebration by stating that living 117 years doesn’t seem like such a long time at all.  I can see where 117 wouldn’t seem like such a long time, especially when you can’t remember the first 116.   Study Finds Coffee May Reduce Risk of MS:  A new study found that people who drink at least four cups of coffee per day were one-third less likely to develop multiple sclerosis than those who drink no coffee.  And…
  • Target to Cut Thousands of Jobs

    Johnny Robish
    3 Mar 2015 | 8:46 pm
    Target to Cut Thousands of Jobs:  U.S. retailer Target Corp announced it plans to cut several thousand jobs as part of a restructuring that will cut $2 billion in costs over two years.  Smart move because now, about the only place those people who got laid-off will be able to afford to shop – will beTarget.   Thief Steals 400 Bottles of Nail Polish:  A theft in the Williamsburg area of Brooklyn has stolen over 400 bottles of nail polish after breaking into a nail salon overnight.  While there were no eye witnesses to the theft, police say the polish was most likely taken by a…
  • Judge Cuts Sentences in Amish Beard-Cutting Attacks

    Johnny Robish
    2 Mar 2015 | 8:08 pm
    Judge Cuts Sentences in Amish Beard-Cutting Attacks:  In a controversial move, a judge has reduced the prison sentences for members of a breakaway Amish group who were charged with “hate-crimes” for chopping-off the hair and beards of fellow members of their faith.  In response, members of ZZ Top say they plan to do everything possible to raise greater awareness of these senseless atrocities.   Scientists Capture Earth’s Tiniest Life Forms:  Scientists at the University of California in Berkeley have captured the first detailed microscopic images of so-called…
  • Fire Breaks Out at Disney’s Small World Ride

    Johnny Robish
    1 Mar 2015 | 9:04 pm
    Fire Breaks Out at Disney’s Small World Ride:  Park officials say a small fire broke out at Disneyland’s “It’s a Small World” attraction, though no one was injured and the ride was not damaged.  While there were no injuries, the fire threatens to play over and over again in the minds of people who witnessed it.   Texas Republican on Fifth Marriage Protests Gay Marriage:  A Roman Catholic Republican Texas lawmaker who is currently on his fifth marriage, has submitted a hand-written complaint against a Texas judge over a recent ruling that allowed two women who have…
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    The Laugh Button

  • If I could say anything about Hicks, it’s that he was doing his best to destroy anything he perceived as hypocrisy

    5 Mar 2015 | 7:23 pm
    “While also revealing stuff that was overly embraced by moralizers. He was a misanthropic moralist, who did his best to get to the bottom of religious hypocrisy, moral hypocrisy, and societal hypocrisy. But he also made you laugh when he did it. That’s a tough trick. But it’s what Bill did.” – Marc Maron tells […] If I could say anything about Hicks, it’s that he was doing his best to destroy anything he perceived as hypocrisy appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • The dais for the Roast of Justin Bieber to include Snoop, Shaq, Ludacris, and Martha Stewart

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:51 pm
    The dais for the Roast Of Justin Bieber has been announced. Joining the roastmaster Kevin Hart, (Hannibal Buress and Jeffery Ross were already announced) will be Martha Stewart, Shaquille O’Neal, Snoop Dogg, and Ludacris. As you can tell by that list, producers are really going for the star power on this one. But “where are […] The dais for the Roast of Justin Bieber to include Snoop, Shaq, Ludacris, and Martha Stewart appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Samantha Bee is leaving The Daily Show to host her own show on TBS

    5 Mar 2015 | 5:25 pm
    Recently, Jason Jones announced he was leaving The Daily Show for his own show he’s producing/writing with his wife Samantha Bee. While we haven’t known whether Bee would jump from TDS with Jones but now it appears she is indeed leaving but it’s for her own show as well. The new topical comedy show is […] Samantha Bee is leaving The Daily Show to host her own show on TBS appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Conan in Cuba, “Old women love me here, dogs hate me”

    Mark Says Hi!
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:10 am
    Conan finds dogs everywhere in the opening for his show in Cuba. Cuban Andy agrees. Conan in Cuba, “Old women love me here, dogs hate me” appeared first on The Laugh Button.
  • Jon Dore set to star in the CBS comedy pilot The Half Of It

    Mark Says Hi!
    5 Mar 2015 | 10:58 am
    Jon Dore has landed the lead in CBS’ multi-camera comedy pilotThe Half Of It. The project, from CBS TV Studios, centers on Mike, played by Dore, a newly divorced dad who revels in the fact that he now gets to keep half his stuff, which is more than he ever had when he was married. Mike is dealing […] Jon Dore set to star in the CBS comedy pilot The Half Of It appeared first on The Laugh Button.
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    Bytes And Banter

  • Cricket World Cup 2015-The Contenders

    10 Feb 2015 | 10:41 pm
    With just three days to go for the biggest cricketing extravaganza to kick off, I couldn't have thought of a better time to return to my blogging ways.Just like the 2011 edition, the World Cup this year too promises to be fiercely competitive as the sides look to get the team combinations right in order to dominate world stage.Here, I analyse the top eight teams and examine their chances of winning cricket's most coveted event, scheduled to be played Down Under.Australia: Inarguably the favourites to win the Cup, Australia, on paper, seems to be the team to beat this season. It proudly…
  • The Lumbering Loner

    8 Jun 2014 | 9:13 pm
                                 Chapter 2:Sam visits Shawn's placeShawn was, by nature, a submissive and a timid person. However, fortunately for him and all those who believe in humanity, he had a brother who was very different. While Shawn was known for making heavy weather of cases of villainy, his brother used to solve them in the most ingenious of ways. Sam was, in fact, one of the most reliable and sought-after detectives in the whole of the country. There was just the one mystery that had remained inexplicable in…
  • Supertraits of Superstars by Priyanka Sinha Jha

    8 Mar 2014 | 12:17 am
    Bollywood has become synonymous with money and fame; the stories of young actors, struggling to make it in the industry only to later blossom as wonderful actors, are all that we hear about the stars. Little do we know about the effort, conscious and subconscious that go into the making of such a star.With examples from eleven different Bollywood stars' life, Priyanka Sinha Jha brings about a new dimension wherein she highlights the important qualities in each actor which propelled them forward to make them the star they are now. Big B's Discipline, King Khan's Passion, Vidya Balan's…
  • Delhi Comicon 2014

    11 Feb 2014 | 7:41 am
    Comicons are a way of life; it is this place where thousands of comic book aficionados come together discussing about various comic issues, shop merchandise to decorate their homes with supremely geeky stuff and have a great time. The Delhi Comicon, which I was finally able to attend after procrastinating for 4 years, was teeming with fans as early as 11 am. Not only did this event house DC and Marvel comic heroes but also paved the way for Raj Comics, Comixology, Fanfare, Garbage Bin and Tinkle Enthusiasts.Photo Credits - Rohit LathkarRead more »
  • Ordinary to Extraordinary!

    10 Feb 2014 | 10:38 am
    I started slow, allowing others to surge ahead...Steadily they ran and never looked back...To see how far behind they had left me!Half a lap had I done...When they already completed one!My mind was all cluttered up...Should I keep it slow and accelerate at the end?Or should I maintain a steady pace?I wondered till my head blew off!'Slow and steady wins the race', I had heard...But, I let that go for a nerd...Further, up in the sky, I saw a bird...And its behaviour left me stirred...Unhurriedly, it flew in the air...Its wanting eyes fixed on the wanted prey...And, all of a sudden, I…
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    Telega Tales

  • Yeah, I became that person

    Karla Telega
    11 Feb 2015 | 6:57 am
    It’s been a long time since I’ve had vomit in my hair. Admittedly, it was a regular occurrence back in the days when I would strip naked and butt dance in the car after a wild party. Lately, the gastric juices are coming from a six month-old bundle of bad breath. My firm resolve never to become a Grandma failed me when my youngest decided to poop out a baby last August. At Michelle’s baby shower, we were asked to write a special message for the baby … you know, for when he learns how to read and set the house on fire and stuff. All my children were of the female gender, so I wasn’t…
  • Under the hood

    Karla Telega
    2 Feb 2014 | 10:52 am
    Last week as I was doing my regular workout routine … you know, 200 push-ups, bench pressing a VW Bug … something distinctly uncomfortable happened in my arm. OK, I was sitting on the sofa eating popcorn and watching Castle re-runs on TV, but it still totally counts as a sports injury. I had butter and salt on the popcorn, which (as everyone knows) makes the kernels heavier than your average styrofoam packing peanut. I’ve got a lot of miles on the chassis, and you don’t want to look under the hood. It ain’t pretty. It should come as no surprise that I tore either a tendon or rotator…
  • Going viral

    Karla Telega
    1 Jan 2014 | 4:19 pm
    “Only old people get flu shots!” How many times have I said that to well-meaning doctors and friends? (Answer: I don’t remember BECAUSE I’M OLD!) So Friday, when my stomach shut down, I figured it must be an intestinal blockage. It was, but that’s beside the point that I never considered the flu as a possibility. Saturday, when the tickle in my throat became a cough; the floor started buckling under my feet as I crossed the room; and I collapsed panting and sweating after tying my shoes, obviously, the blockage had turned into septic shock. I tried to remember if I told Dave the…
  • A good day to Twihard

    Karla Telega
    16 Jun 2013 | 7:38 am
    As many of you know, I’ve been in the job market. For the last month I’ve been posting my resume on job boards, and avoiding all the openings for Pizza Hut delivery persons. When you need a job to continue your lavish diet of beans, rice, and the occasional Big Mac, being without one raises a certain level of anxiety. I’ve chosen to combat fear with compulsive behavior. Doesn’t everybody? I naturally rented Bruce Willis reprising his role as John McClane in A Good Day to Die Hard, but chiefly, I’ve been watching the entire Twilight Saga, again, and again, and again. In some karmic…
  • A double espresso to go, please

    Karla Telega
    8 May 2013 | 7:43 am
    The winds of fortune shat on me this week (have shitten?) I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to devote all my time to writing and publishing for the last few years, a fiscally foolhardy courageous move on my part. I’ve made some amazing online friends and have published two books and a couple anthologies. That’s something I can hang my hat on. A financial disaster has struck our family. Since I’m not willing to stand on the street corner with a cardboard sign that says, “Will rite for cheaz,” I’m forced to once more seek employment of the type that provides a regular check,…
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    Witty Woman Writing

  • If You’re Over The Hill, Prepare To Get Thrown Under The Bus

    24 Feb 2015 | 9:07 pm
    The point is, age does not equal ignorance, incapability, or unwillingness. To think so, however, does equal inexperience, unawareness and stupidity.
  • Is It Just Me, Or Does Valentine’s Day Suck?

    10 Feb 2015 | 10:54 pm
    Women love it, men dread it and singles hate it. Welcome to Valentine’s Day. When I was newly married (eons ago), one of my first Valentine’s Day gifts was a Hoover vacuum. Clearly he had missed the meaning of the occasion. Sadly this was not the worst gift I’ve ever received on the day of […]
  • Those Were The Days, My Friend ….

    27 Jan 2015 | 10:31 pm
    Remember when you were younger (much younger) and you thought your life was crap? Fast forward 40 years or so and look back. Turns out it was pretty damn awesome and you don’t remember being miserable about all the things you didn’t have. I recently posted a TBT (Throw Back Thursday) picture on my Facebook […]
  • Why You Should Never Watch The News Again!

    13 Jan 2015 | 10:50 pm
    Aside from the fact that the nightly news is freakishly depressing and leaves you feeling like a hopeless deer in the headlights, it could be killing your ability to cope. With everything. I love Brian Williams, he is adorable, well dressed and well mannered. But he is no longer welcome in my home. Neither are […]
  • Slightly Used and Damaged

    7 Jan 2015 | 8:04 am
    For those of us who have reached maturity (I’m still waiting), and have had to start life over (yet again), admitting that we are less than what we once were, is humbling. Slightly used and damaged can pretty much describe almost everything in my house … including me. When I entered into a relationship with […]
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    Zero People Found This Helpful

  • There has to be a cheaper way…

    23 Feb 2015 | 4:32 pm
    It seems like $999.99 might be a but much for a Prison Jumpsuit…   Oh right, that would be one way… 4 of 4 people found the following review helpful I found a better way to get this- cheaper too!,March 5, 2014 By Oragami I found out a cheaper way to get this- I robbed the local McDonalds, and they gave me one of my own. Smelled funny though. Permalink 4 of 5 people found the following review helpful Irony, November 10, 2013 By David A. Barak This review is from: Orange State Prison Jumpsuit Costume (Plus 1x/2x, Orange) (Apparel) I stole the money to buy this costume, and…
  • The Societal Pressures on Men

    9 Jan 2015 | 5:27 pm
    To have a tiny head and sock-sized bulge in their penis-region. Thank you for calling out these unrealistic expectations, Justin Bieber The Societal Pressures on Men is a post from: Zero People Found This Helpful
  • I feel really bad for laughing at the reviews for this book

    22 Dec 2014 | 11:44 pm
    At least she’s getting a lot of fiber. The other reviews delve into all sorts of horrible humor: 26 of 28 people found the following review helpful One Star By Leslie F. Miller on August 1, 2014 Format: Hardcover Dis book taste yucky. Cover hard to chew.   50 of 61 people found the following review helpful Not as helpful as I originally thought for non-working parents living in Florida. By David A. Frank on May 14, 2014 Format: Paperback Don’t be like me and order things on the internet without your reading glasses on. I thought this would be a good gift for my parents who…
  • Squatty Potty – for all your squatting potty needs

    30 Oct 2014 | 5:42 pm
    I actually have heard that putting a box to raise your feet up when you poo is a good idea – getting back to our caveman roots and pooping the way we evolved to. Let’s see if paying for a professional version works for the reviewers: Customer Review 1,253 of 1,284 people found the following review helpful This changes everything. Well, okay… just pooping., November 6, 2013 By Mark Jaquith Verified Purchase This review is from: Squatty Potty Ecco 9″ – Elimination Aid – Natural Bathroom Relief Through A Toilet Stool (Baby Product) I gingerly climbed on top…
  • Come In / Go Away Doormat

    7 Oct 2014 | 12:26 am
    I actually like this doormat, if it wasn’t so expensive. It’s called an ambigram if you’re wondering. Most Helpful Customer Reviews 78 of 78 people found the following review helpful By Garred A. Oldham on March 10, 2010 Verified Purchase i turned it backwards when my family was coming over. but no one did what i said. damn thing is defective Comment Come In / Go Away Doormat is a post from: Zero People Found This Helpful
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    Epiphanies that will Alter the Course of Human Events

  • Eliminate Verbal Communication

    Greg Mischio
    2 Mar 2015 | 5:00 am
    People belly-ache about having to respond to so many text, email and Facebook messages. I have a simple solution: Let’s go with the digital flow, and eliminate verbal communication. According to some statistic I just made up, the average American spends 26.5 hours a day texting and typing digital responses. Email is like those dudes from Hydra: Delete one, and two take its place. Something’s gotta give, folks. And the answer is quite is simple. It’s time we stop talking to each other. Just think about how inefficient human speech is. Consider the conversation with my daughter at…
  • The Pizza Extremists

    Greg Mischio
    23 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    News headlines are filled with harrowing stories of religious and political extremists carrying out horrifying attacks. For once, can’t we have an extremist who is cool? I think that would be nice, thus I’ve launched the Pizza Extremists. Personally, I don’t think it would be much fun to be an extremist. Granted, you’ve got the guarantee that your god will reward you in the afterlife for killing his innocent creatures. But still, burning people alive and slaughtering innocent children doesn’t seem like it’s all that pleasurable – for you or the victims. The typical extremist…
  • The Poo and Pee Comedian

    Greg Mischio
    16 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    Why are there so many potty mouth comedians? I believe it’s due to oppressive parents who never let us get the scatalogical giggles out of our system. That’s a huge opportunity missed, and it led to my latest epiphany. The genesis of the Poo and Pee Comedian can be traced back to a conversation I had with my son when he was but a wee lad. (Wee as in small, not as in ‘wee wee.’) I picked him up from kindergarten, and he was giggling as we drove home. “Did something funny happen, young man?” I eyeballed him in the car seat. “Yeah,” he replied, doing his best to contain himself.
  • Why You Should Pay for My Haircut

    Greg Mischio
    9 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    I’m sorry if you’re offended by the grotesque haircut that precedes this blog post. You can either stare it in or disgust, or be a willing participant in my latest epiphany: Forcing people to pay for my next haircut. My hair, like other parts of my body that will remain unnamed, has a mind of its own. This band of renegade follicles does whatever it damn well pleases, whenever it damn well pleases. Not that I do much to tame the ‘do. I eschew hair products. I haven’t combed the beast since I was in my thirties. And I judge the quality of a haircut by how much it costs and if I can…
  • World Leaders Need to Converse in Doggy Voice

    Greg Mischio
    2 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    I’m always amazed by how people will talk to their dogs in sweet, loving tones, and then rip their fellow man a new one. It’s why I decided to instill peace and harmony in the human race by convincing world leaders to speak in doggy voice. My oldest brother is an evil ogre. Many a times as a youth he tried to tear my arms from their sockets, and as an adult, he now tries to take the legs as well. Despite inflicting cruel, unspeakable horrors upon me, he has a soft spot in his heart for doggies. I recall him speaking in an affected voice to his dog, lovingly commending him for snarling at…
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  • Will Smith is the Nicest Man in Hollywood!

    2 Mar 2015 | 12:00 am
    I am going to start this post by saying that I realize that there are many other thing about this person that might turn people off. I do not want to focus on those things. What I want to focus on is his integrity and success in the world of show business. I am talking about actor, Will Smith. I would go as far as to make the claim that he is the nicest man in Hollywood. My amazement to his kindness started out when he released the song “Just the Two of Us.” He was the first rapper (and frankly the last) that I have heard keep ALL of their songs clean and with a positive message.
  • Thundersnow?!?!

    27 Feb 2015 | 4:54 pm
    For those of you who don’t know, New England has been buried with snow this winter. Literally if you took all of the inches of snow we have received in the last few months and piled it on top of the 5′ 1″ that I am you would not see me, AT ALL. I would need more than a straw to reach the top to breath. I would need more than a meter stick! Needless to say this snow is getting out of hand. I have gotten to the point where I hear snow in the forecast and I just basically roll my eyes and say “welp why not?”.   When you are taking a turn on to a road you…
  • Breakfast at Tiffany’s!

    24 Feb 2015 | 5:08 am
    After watching multiple posts on my friend Ronnie’s blog, I decided it was time to finally see Breakfast at Tiffany’s. All I can say is *swoon*. There is so much about that movie that shows we are in a different time but there is still so much to relate to. To start with, Audrey Hepburn is just flawless. From her appearance, to her acting skills to her voice. Everything about her was just phenomenal. But as with most movies I don’t like to just do a movie review. I like to pick out a part of the movie that spoke to me and explain why. So the part of the movie that spoke to…
  • I have a thing for handles…

    20 Feb 2015 | 5:16 am
    One thing I love about this blog is it is a safe place to share my confessions. This one has been weighing on me for some time. I didn’t know who to share it with because I didn’t want to get those odd sideways glances. I didn’t want to tell my boyfriend and cause unnecessary jealousy. So I held it in. But I can’t hold it in any longer. I want to shout it from the roof tops. I have a thing….not a small thing but a large thing…an obsession really…don’t judge me but… I have a thing for handles. Phew. There I said it. That was a huge relief.
  • My famous name twin: Shailene Woodley

    16 Feb 2015 | 4:29 am
    When you have a name like Shaeleen, finding someone with the same name is pretty rare. Shailene Woodley does not share the spelling of my name but since she shares the name I was pretty excited to learn about her. When I first heard her name on T.V I was like “I knew my name was meant for fame!” Determined to share some common ground with my name twin I decided to do a little research. Here are the similarities I found: 1) Passion for the arts: Well this one is obvious. She is an actress and I wish that I was an actress. Basically she made it and I am still dreaming. But knowing…
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    Plans for Nigel

  • R.I.P.

    Jackie Loveland Winsor
    27 Feb 2015 | 9:17 am
    Rest in pieces, The Hug. I drew this picture on the very first day I got my wonderful car, on July 3, 2012. We only had two and a half short years together before The Hug's shoddy brakes betrayed the both of us, and we ran a red light and smashed into the side of a Jeep (which came away with nothing but a substantial dent in comparison). Farewell, sweet The Hug. Journey on into the Autobahn of the netherworld, where you can finally break 85 without making that unsettling groaning noise, where your paint has no scratches and your windshield no cracks. May you always have a full tank of gas,…
  • Trading Habitats

    Jackie Loveland Winsor
    24 Jan 2015 | 8:46 pm
    At my mother's behest, I have also scanned and thus forever preserved one of my crowning achievements in middle-school science assignments. Hopefully you all enjoy it as much as she does."Jackie, are you scanning and posting all your childhood drawings because you're too lazy to draw new things?"I... uh, what? No! Shut up. Read this adorable educational book I wrote.Also, since this lovely note from a teacher was included in the same folder with this book, I thought I'd share it as a little bonus, so you can all see what a wonderful mother I have.
  • Even More Super Weasel

    Jackie Loveland Winsor
    24 Jan 2015 | 8:14 pm
    In case you thought I was done with Super Weasel comics, don't worry! There's more where that came from!Today's collection samples a few of the shorter episodes, from three panels to two pages. That way if you don't have time to try and decipher a whole long episode of Tweenage-Jackie handwriting in one go, you can take it in short bursts.The first comic for this post actually started out as a school assignment and probably won me some major brownie points with my history teacher (yes, I was That Kid in school.)Now let's travel back together to a time when life was simpler, and apparently…
  • Super Weasel: The Squirrels (Parts I-III)

    Jackie Loveland Winsor
    8 Jan 2015 | 9:47 am
    This is a story about Super Weasel's frenimies, The Squirrels. This story has an important moral, which makes absolutely no sense. I'm wishing I had the original copies of these so I could make better scans, but alas... They are lost to the ages.Click the image to enlarge.
  • The Adventures of Super Weasel

    Jackie Winsor
    6 Jan 2015 | 8:14 pm
    Once upon a time, loooooong ago, before I had a blog... Before I had a computer... Before I drew pictures on the internet... ...there was Super Weasel. When I was very young, I was assigned in my English class to adapt a fairy tale to my own telling. I think, at least... it was a long time ago, who can remember. How it started isn't important, what matters is what came of it. Even as a young child I was super hilarious, so that simple assignment would turn into a legacy that would last for decades to come. Weasels have always been a family in-joke where I come from,…
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    Conspiracy Theories ...from the Reality Challenged

  • Why Everyone Should Work a Service Job at Least Once in Their Lives

    Sandra Creason
    24 Feb 2015 | 10:12 am
    My very first service job was as an associate at Wal-mart in the shoe department.  Glamorous, glamorous.  It didn't last long - one can only shuffle through so many boxes of nasty, worn shoes that people had left behind in order to steal new shoes and price-check ridiculously priced knock-off sneakers, after all.I moved from the high life of Wal-Mart into waitressing, burned out on that and entered the mind-numbing world of daycare and Pre-K (mind-numbing in the sense that it's not normal for an adult to spend every waking hour with toddlers watching Veggie Tales and noshing on mac…
  • Why I Suck at Being a Girl

    Sandra Creason
    22 Jan 2015 | 9:22 pm
    Okay, before the jokes start flying and the rumor wheels start a’spinnin,’ no, I don’t have any “extra parts” and I’m as physically intact and functional as any other human female. No, the point of this post has to do more with the fact that not only does mainstream media have some sort of blindingly bedazzled, feather boa’d hat that they pull “female” stereotypes from every time they cast a woman in a movie/tv show, and there are only about a handful of females that I know well who I can stand to be in the same room with for more than just a few minutes.  You know who you…
  • How Boobs are Destroying the World

    Sandra Creason
    4 Jun 2014 | 1:19 pm
    Here’s another entry for the “Most Likely to Spawn Naughty Adsense” section, surely to net me a truckload of disappointed, angry pervs who only came here because it contains the term “ginormous breasteses”  and a few dick jokes, and an email account full of angry women who will accuse me of betraying my gender and being totally full of myself.Thing is, dear fellow women, that this rant is mostly aimed at you, anyway.  Yes, you.  But Sandra, what the hell did I do and why are you talking to me in a blog post about boobs?  I’m glad you asked.Because if you’re one of those…
  • There's No Age Limit on Funny

    Sandra Creason
    2 Apr 2014 | 6:30 am
    My 18 year old niece told me not too long ago that she loved hanging out with me because I acted like I was her age.I don't know if this is a good thing or not, considering that I'm 31 29.Sure, I don't see anything wrong with laughing at farts and making a running gag out of that one time the girl in Secret Life said "do you ever think of anything but sex" (wait for it), but there seems to be this expectation that once you reach a certain age, have kids, and can hold a steady job that doesn't involve asking people what kind of dipping sauce they'd like with their…
  • Dear Internet

    Sandra Creason
    26 Mar 2014 | 7:32 pm
    WARNING:  Since I’m addressing some of the random, crazy things I’ve encountered in everyday *normal* use of the internet, there is some adult content in this post.  Don’t get too excited, there aren’t any naughty pictures.Also, I’m totally aware that the internet is not a person, but since I don’t know anything about it other than how to blog, operate Facebook, and create obnoxious memes, I’m just going to address this to “internet.” Every word in the English language does not directly translate to “vagina.”No matter which you use as your default search engine, it…
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  • Women or Cigarettes? Hmmm…

    27 Feb 2015 | 7:51 am
    Cigarettes are very much in the news these days. Tobacco companies Reynolds American and Lorillard are joining forces in a merger valued at $27.4 billion. Part of the rationale for the deal is that a bigger company can slice off a larger piece of the rapidly growing e-cigarette market. I don’t smoke now, but I used to. I smoked about a pack and a half a day, back in my high school and college years, into my 20s. Like a lot of kids, I used to sneak around, so my parents wouldn’t know about my smoking. My father was a big cigar smoker; my mother smoked Parliaments. I was about 16 when I…

    13 Feb 2015 | 8:40 am
    <—  Click HERE to go back to   Just for fun, we’ve compiled a guide to some of our favorite romantic comedies you can watch on Netflix. It’s not a complete list. It’s not alphabetized or prioritized in any way at this point.  Plus it will be changing and growing as we get feedback from you.  Feel free to comment below or email us at to include your favorites or to remove some that you feel don’t make the cut. Romeo & Juliet:  This version of the Shakespeare tale was popular in its day amongst teenagers for being…

    12 Feb 2015 | 11:07 am
    <—  Click HERE to go back to How to send these cards: Pick the one(s) you like. Drag them to your desktop, Paste into an email, text or social media. Add your own customized message, … and that’s it. Your card will be included with your message for a little touch of nostalgia With our compliments, Happy Valentines   <—  Click HERE to go back to     The post FREE VALENTINE E-CARDS TO SEND TO FRIENDS & LOVERS appeared first on DoYouRemember?.
  • John Lennon’s 4 Favorite Liverpool Pubs

    21 Aug 2014 | 6:00 am
    At the height of his fame, John Lennon would reminisce about the Liverpool pubs he loved as a young lad. As we celebrate International Beatlweek, which just kicked off in that historic English port city, let’s wander back to the four Liverpool pubs John loved most and raise a glass to him, here, there and everywhere.  SEE ALSO: June 1963: The Beatles Create “She Loves You”—and the World Goes Crazy We begin in: 1. The Grapes, Mathew Street The Grapes is a compact pub in the narrow City Centre alley called Mathew Street. Today, the cobbled pathway is legendary, but once it was…
  • Unforgettable Winter Olympic Rematches

    14 Feb 2014 | 10:30 am
    <– Click HERE to go back to DoYouRemember Main Page  At the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi, two storylines that later inspired films make remarkable reappearances. As a companion to the events, we at DoYouRemember thought we’d bring you up to date. Ice Hockey: Unites States verses Russia: February 15th In the 1980 Winter Olympics at Lake Placid, in what became known as the “Miracle on Ice” and later inspired the Disney film Miracle, the United States hockey team—made up solely of collegiate athletes and amateurs—defeated the Soviet national team in one of the biggest upsets…
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  • Parent Hacks – 16 Ways To Childproof Everything

    Jade Waddy
    12 Feb 2015 | 9:03 am
    We’ve all been there, if you don’t own a cheeky little monkey then you’re related to one or have friends with one. You can’t escape them, sometimes they’ll be physically stuck to you. But not to worry, as we’re here to help ease the pain with these cheap and simple ways to childproof your life!1. Get yourself some plastic cookie cutters to use as locks on cupboards.Flickr2. Put crazy straws in your child’s cup (must have lid) upside down so they can’t pull it outMade In China3. Want to keep them away from metal scissors? Simply put a lock…
  • The History Of Light [Infographic]

    Jade Waddy
    12 Feb 2015 | 7:44 am
    Have you ever wondered how we first came across the idea of using light to our advantage? Well we surprisingly started doing this in 13,000 BC when cavemen used shells filled with animal fat soaked moss on fire. It’s since grown into something quite spectacular, as you can see from this timeline style infographic from MMA Consultancy. Created by MMA Consultancy Source: Array
  • What Happens In An Internet Minute – 2013 VS 2014

    Jade Waddy
    19 Dec 2014 | 2:04 am
    Who else likes the internet? You’d be hard pressed to find a single human being, that isn’t a baby or elderly person, that doesn’t use it in one way or another. It’s interesting to know exactly what everyone gets up to online, we’ve all got a slightly nosy nature inside us or an inquisitive attitude to life. This fantastic infographic by Tech Spartan looks at what we all did online over the last 60 seconds, what we did last year and how much certain companies have grown because of it. Created by Tech Spartan Source: Array
  • What Not To Buy People For Christmas [Infographic]

    Jade Waddy
    11 Dec 2014 | 5:55 am
    So Christmas is almost here and we’re getting ready for the chilly weather and that all important Christmas holiday. But many of you won’t have bought all of your presents yet and that’s terrible. But don’t worry as below is a cool infographic by Boxman showing you what you should not be buying for Christmas according to latest statistics. No more socks and shower gel, please!  Source: Array
  • These Animals Really Hate Bathtime

    Jade Waddy
    24 Nov 2014 | 7:42 am
    Do you remember when you were little, most of us hated having a bath if it didn’t involve bubble beards or rubber duckies? The same happens to animals, as you can see from these rather depressing but hilarious photos of animals hating bathtime. RedditAugieDoggyImgurInstructablesIheartferretsUpcomingViral SquidHumorSharingWildlife AmbulanceDistractifyWorld Bird SanctuaryFlickrReptileRadioLackColour Source: Array
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    David Beckham Comics - Home

  • Spock

    27 Feb 2015 | 1:12 pm
    What can you say about people who give you something that takes you away from where you are and put you there where you've never been in a very good way? If it's Amy Winehouse or Sinatra, Star Trek or Shakespeare, an hour or a second? If it's a second that you remember the rest of your life then it was a pretty everlasting second. Thanks to people who do things that make other people fondly remember what they did for the rest of their lives.People like Nimoy.
  • Watch-Her Drop-Dead-Look Galactic-Gus

    25 Feb 2015 | 11:50 am
    Giving an all new deadly aspect to the term Femme Fatale, the Watch-Her and Galactic-Gus get down to dirty looks!
  • Watch-Her Messy Bodysuit 

    16 Feb 2015 | 1:21 pm
    The Watch-Her's new bodysuit gets brained while Galactic Gus, The Fantastic-Bores and the rest of a planet on the brink of destruction watch! Read the Bores and find out what happens next!
  • The Watch-Her & The Messy Squirt

    11 Feb 2015 | 2:58 pm
    The Watch-Her reveals her dark sexy past while juices squirt wild and messy as though from an abused lemon! Read it in Fantastic Bores!
  • Silver Dude Has Sex With Earthling Before Attacking Boss

    10 Feb 2015 | 2:28 pm
    After the Silver dude has no-holes-or-holds-barred sex with blind girlfriend of the Thong during work-hours, he then attacks his unsuspecting and very hungry boss afterwards! Find out why when the Silver dude goes head to head with Galactic-Gus!!
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    Above Average

  • Throwback Thursday: Conan O’Brien’s Most Ridiculous Remote Segments

    Above Average
    5 Mar 2015 | 3:47 pm
    Whenever Conan O’Brien does anything declaring, “and I brought a camera crew with me,” you know it’s gonna be good.  He’s the king of remote segments, it cannot be disputed. Over the last 20 years, Conan has done so many, it’s impossible to pick a favorite. Here are 6 of his most ridiculous segments, and when we say ridiculous, we mean awesome. Conan Plays Old-Timey Baseball: Some say old fashioned baseball is a waste of time, “others say an incredible waste of time.” But it gets a lot more fun when Conan O’Brien shows up and plays…
  • The Applebee’s Lord’s Prayer

    Above Average
    5 Mar 2015 | 3:28 pm
    This week, a man from New Jersey unsuccessfully sued Applebee’s after he burned his face while praying over a hot plate of fajitas. We leafed through the holy scripture and found a prayer to keep this from happening to you the next time you head over to Applebee’s.
  • 6 Other Times Hillary Clinton Was the Bad Girl of the White House

    Above Average
    5 Mar 2015 | 1:23 pm
    As you probably know, Hillary Clinton was caught disobeying government policies by refusing to use her work e-mail, and instead sent all her messages privately from her personal e-mail address. However, this isn’t the first time Hillary has gotten busted for being a sneaky little rulebreaker. Don’t let her hang out with your daughters, because here are 6 other times Hillary went to detention for being the bad girl of Politics:   When she got caught smoking in the girl’s bathroom   Giving a hand job in the back of the bus   Throwing rocks at a barn   That…
  • Men’s Rights Venn Diagram

    Joanna Bradley
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:00 am
    Last week, Men’s Rights Activist and general Prince Charming, Roosh Vorek, made a case for legalizing rape in this article. Some Men’s Rights Activists responded, saying that Vorek doesn’t represent the entire MRA community. Given the apparent complexity of the Men’s Rights Activist identity, we’ve generated an easy-to-read Venn Diagram to explore this exciting underworld of men under the impression that they are anything but all-powerful. Below is a Venn diagram, illustrating the complex relationship between men’s rights activists, rapists, cry babies,…
  • Conan in Cuba: A Historic and Hilarious Episode

    Above Average
    5 Mar 2015 | 10:41 am
    The ‘Conan in Cuba’ special aired Wednesday night, and the highly-anticipated episode was a huge success. Conan took advantage of the end of the Kennedy-era embargo and immersed himself in Cuban culture by picking up some spicy dance moves and Spanish slang. It’s safe to say that our diplomatic relations with Cuba were restored the moment he shared a rum juice box with some of his new friends. Here’s some of the episode’s best segments: 1. “Yo Soy Nutella, Yo Soy Nutella!” Conan freestyles some salsa lyrics with his 8th grade expansive knowledge…
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    The Life Lessonbook

  • Deep-Fried Disaster

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:31 am
    One of the best parts of becoming an adult is the moment you realize that you are now capable of getting that thing you always wanted as a kid. Dirt bike? In-ground pool? Tree house with a giant TV? It’s all good! YOU HAVE A CREDIT CARD NOW! One of the worst parts of becoming an adult, however, is the following moment. That’s when you realize that as an adult, it’s no longer acceptable to spend money on dumb junk. You can usually push through this realization while you’re still single, but if you’re married? Good luck. Since we’ve been married, Deserae has shot down almost all of…
  • Bags and Bags of Cash

    25 Feb 2015 | 4:59 am
    Most of life’s lessons sneak up on you when you’re least expecting them. Monday’s lesson was not one of those. In a venture that I’m sure I’ll write more about in the future, Deserae and I have recently started selling things online. It has been going well. This Monday, it started going REAL well. By 6 p.m., we had tripled our previous high day for sales. At 7 p.m., we found a new treasure trove of items to sell. By 8 p.m., I had used the word “goldmine” at least three times. At 9 p.m., I sent a text with nine money bag emojis. So when I drove into a pothole at 9:30, I knew…
  • Free* Parking

    18 Feb 2015 | 4:30 am
    Deserae and I went to Hawaii a few weeks ago because it is zero degrees in Cleveland, which seems to be the optimal time to leave if you want to spark a jealous rage in your co-workers. The trip was perfect. There were leaping whales and impossibly beautiful days and perfect, empty beaches and I can see that rage in your eye, so I’ll stop now. Instead, I’ll share an important lesson I learned from the worst place in Maui. For me, the worst place in Maui is a town called Lahaina. Lahaina’s main feature is one long street where someone decided to pack in as many restaurants, souvenir…
  • Happy Dalentine’s Day!

    11 Feb 2015 | 4:55 am
    There’s a subtle but real difference between “thrifty” and “cheap.” Thrifty people check for discount codes before buying something online. Cheap people close checkout lines with their coupon schemes to get 25 free tubes of toothpaste. Thrifty people bring their pack a lunch for work. Cheap people are OK with leftovers from the trash as long as they’re “above the rim.” When you’re trying to live a thrifty lifestyle, you sometimes wonder if you’ve gone a little too far. It’s usually tough to tell if you’re about to cross the line into cheap territory,…
  • Eye of the Baby Elephant

    4 Feb 2015 | 5:00 am
    Pro football coach Herm Edwards once famously got irked at a reporter who asked if his team had quit. He stared at the reporter for a moment before slowly answering, “This is the greatest thing about sports. (long pause) You play…to win…the game. (condescending look) Hello? You play! To win! THE GAME!” I would not have put it exactly that way. I would have looked at the reporter and said, “This is the greatest thing about sports: You play…to chew…the sunflower seeds.” Sitting on the baseball bench for four years, I became AMAZING at sticking half a bag of sunflower seeds…
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    RhymeZone Forums

  • 5 Mar 2015 | 6:13 pm

    John Wertz
    5 Mar 2015 | 6:13 pm
    Yes, love risotto! A New Yorker cartoon caption "risottos hotline. We have an emergency!"
  • 5 Mar 2015 | 2:05 pm

    5 Mar 2015 | 2:05 pm
    I jus can't wait for the summery days were I can see the stars from a far hopefully no rainy days ya my new favorite song my new favorite thing is wrong I need to be strong I have all along I came jus like big Sean don't need a act on I'm not the one to cheat on don't lead on keep on I'm gonna get my egg on hold on ya say ya like me whats there to like about me see I take notes maybe ya need to take notes I might write ya a love letter I think it might make me wetter it might come out like water I need to grow stronger I don't know how much longer I'm not getting any younger can I get ya…
  • A Collaborative Poem

    5 Mar 2015 | 8:30 am
    Since there are many who love poetry here, I thought that perhaps we should create a collaborative poem. I will start it off with a single line and each following post should have two lines. The first line should rhyme with the last line of the prior user's post, and the second line can be anything (the next user will need to rhyme it). I look forward to the direction the poem takes.
  • Constrained Writing

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:15 am
    I am a big fan of constrained writing (beyond the general poetic constraints of rhyming and meter) In this thread, I am curious to see anyone's constrained writing works. For a better explanation of what I mean, look at "constrained writing" on wikipedia, but for some examples: Palindromes Acrostics Chaterism or other constraints that you invent. Please explain what constraint you used in your post.
  • Sermon on the mound

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:09 am
    The manager walks slowly Barely lifts his feet Yet avoids the third base line Bad luck? Maybe he’s just neat What the hell you doing out here! Shaking off half the signs If they know the fastballs coming They’ll hit every time And don’t be talk to the umpire That’s the job for me Well, are you getting tried It looks like that to me “Come on skip What am I suppose too do Dam shortstop drops a pop up Going to blame that on me to That umpire he needs glasses Sure has got it in for me And I wouldn’t shake the signs off If the catcher would agree” I don’t need your lame excuses…
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    The Name's Ponyboy

  • Raiders of the Lost Ark Adaptation

    5 Mar 2015 | 12:00 pm
    Check out this cool story on Vice about two friends who spent 8 years remaking Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark shot for shot.  It’s a cool story and the ultimate tribute to one of the best films ever made. The post Raiders of the Lost Ark Adaptation appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • It Follows – Trailer

    5 Mar 2015 | 9:30 am
    Check out the trailer to this new scary movie called “It Follows.”  It looks pretty good and it doesn’t hurt at all that the lead Maika Monroe is super hot. The post It Follows – Trailer appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • I Like These (33)

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:30 am
    I’ve been spending a lot of time at the gym lately. The post I Like These (33) appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • Panty Party

    4 Mar 2015 | 12:00 pm
    It looks like a bunch of hot girls got together and organized a panty party. Good thing the Ponyboy crew was their to catch it. The post Panty Party appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
  • I Like These (31)

    4 Mar 2015 | 6:30 am
    Check out that sweet rat tail on Labeouf…. The post I Like These (31) appeared first on The Name's Ponyboy.
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    Winston's Random Musings

  • Happy New Years

    Winston Chong
    17 Feb 2015 | 5:44 pm
    Those who have already broken their 1 Jan resolutions on the Western calendar can have a second shot at the Lunar New Year which starts tomorrow. And if that fails, aim for the Malay calendar or the Indian one. This privilege only applies to Singaporeans since everyone around the world knows how the country enjoys racial harmony and a Singaporean always has three friends from different races as depicted on government posters and TV commercials.Let's assume that the annual Chinese Zodiac horoscope is 100% accurate notwithstanding the multiple versions floating around. Then by extension, the…
  • Wishing all a great 2015? meh

    Winston Chong
    31 Dec 2014 | 7:46 pm
    Wishing all my friends a great 2015 sound so insincere since each friend will only get a fraction of my total Wish Power which will be meaningless. Instead I'm gonna direct 100% of my total Wish Power to the one person that needs all the luck in the new year - ME. And if everything goes well, I should become a millionaire in 2015 as long as nobody wish me 100% of his/her bad luck which will effectively cancel each other out.
  • All in a day's work in Singapore - real-life office stories as told to me (Part 8)

    Winston Chong
    23 Dec 2014 | 12:09 am
    "When you are the source of misery at the workplace, it is always good to be humble and apologise with something like "I'm sorry you didn't bother to read my email"; or "I'm sorry you are the only one who couldn't understand my simple step-by-step guide". If you find yourself apologising frequently, it's time to dig up your CV. And you can thank me for that."***** "We always wear a mask at work whether we like it or not. I'm so glad to finally found someone who knows her way around the company whom I can confide in. I poured my heart out to her while she listened attentively without…
  • An unscientific look at Singapore hawker stall signboards

    Winston Chong
    30 Nov 2014 | 7:13 am
    Singapore is without a doubt, a food paradise offering all kinds of cuisine to suit your palate. And our hawker centres are a good source for meals and snacks at affordable least for now.Rather than joining the battalion of food bloggers and critique on the dishes, let me instead discuss the various types of stall signboards for a change. Needless to say, these signboards have absolutely no bearings to the food they serve, nor should you draw any conclusion for that matter. Click to read moreType 1 - Menu signboard   One of the most common types of signboard you will see at…
  • This Singapore nerd's musings on himself (part 5)

    Winston Chong
    21 Nov 2014 | 1:29 am
    I was conned into buying five work shirts during my recent trip to Seoul but I was too embarrassed to admit. The swindlers were so smooth that I was sold even without them speaking a word! Hey people! Don't be like me. Remember that clothes worn by the mannequins will definitely look 10 times better than you can ever pull off. *****Seven years can be a long time and I'm at the fork of the road to either continue with what I'm having or ditch the old and embrace the new. Hence I decided to step out and look at what the market has to offer and bought a new bolster.*****The Missus kept…
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    Funny Lifestyle & Relationship Blog With A Snarky Twist: MelanysGuydlines - Melanys Guydlines

  • I Am A Shorty Awards Finalist in Blogger: MelanysGuydlines

    2 Mar 2015 | 12:25 pm
    I AM A FINALIST FOR THE SHORTY AWARD IN BLOGGER!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL ALL 577 NOMINATIONS! The official announcement went out in the The Hollywood Reporter today!! Plus, I was the fan favorite, which is awesome and a special distinction for having the most nominations in the blogger category!!! I am a proud Vox Populi Shorty Award winner in blogger for 2015. The Vox Populi is a distinction given to finalists with exemplary campaigns and the most nominations. I am so excited and honored to be listed along side some of the most talented celebrities, actors, actresses,... Continue…
  • 32 Snarky Relationships Tips from My Dog Teddy Brewski- PART 2

    27 Feb 2015 | 3:15 pm
    There are so many posts on this site that sometimes I forget snarky nuggets I have written. Thankfully, there are sites that help me get content to you without it being lost in the blogosphere forever such as StumbleUpon. If you don’t know it, you should. You could spend the rest of your life on that site and never get up to go to the bathroom. I don’t recommend it because I dated a guy that did things like that and I think he is still sitting in front of his computer, but I do recommend allotting a certain amount... Continue Reading
  • What Is A Social Media Influencer?

    24 Feb 2015 | 8:37 am
      People always ask me what a social media influencer is and what it is that I do for a living? Well, besides being a snarky blogger, I work as an influencer for some great companies. A company that knows the importance of influencers is Cox Business. They are the same company behind the #GetStarted events that take place around the country and supports small businesses and entrepreneurs. They are also the great company that sent me to the UFC fight where I got to fight with the Ice Man himself (not really, but kinda). Tomorrow, I am going back... Continue Reading
  • An Open Letter to MelanysGuydlines Fans, Friends and Followers:

    18 Feb 2015 | 4:58 am
      Please nominate MelanysGuydlines (a.k.a. Melanyb12 on twitter) for a Shorty Award in the blogger category. The Shorty awards are the Oscars for Social Media. It would be a huge honor to take home this prize and I am currently in the number one position with 555 nominations but the contest ends (tomorrow) this Thursday February 19, 2015 and the person behind me is getting close. Nominations are only available via Twitter so you must have an active account to nominate. Past honors have gone to celebs and social media stars including Jerry Seinfeld, Will Ferrell, Tracy Morgan, Andrew…
  • Are You Ready For The College Hoops Tournament? Win $400 From Retro Brand: 3 Winners

    16 Feb 2015 | 6:47 am
      Why hello there! How many of you caught the SNL 40th Anniversary special last night? What did you think? I loved it. Great show! I could have had #morecowbell #sitdownkanye and Eddie Murphy’s laugh should have made an appearance. Also, where was Drunk Uncle? The only person I saw was David Spade with a mini bottle? Snarky! Anyway….. Love me some laughs and sports obviously from the title of this post! Well, we are all sad that football season is over but do you know what that means? It means that it is almost College Hoops Tournament time. Basketball!... Continue Reading
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    Welcome to The Midside

  • The Most Illogical Edition

    2 Mar 2015 | 9:45 pm
    This week we say goodbye to another great. To honor Leonard Nimoy we take on the most illogical–net neutrality and the black and blue dress. Also, in TV with JML, Justin reviews the Battle Creek premiere and Dan’iel reviews House of Cards Season 3.
  • The Everything Isn’t Awesome Edition

    23 Feb 2015 | 10:29 pm
    As Daniel takes the week off, Justin brings in another gay to back up Elliot’s Oscar analysis and is promptly double-teamed. No, wait, that sounds wrong. Oh, who cares? It’ll get you to listen. 
  • The #NotAllVDaysEdition

    16 Feb 2015 | 11:58 pm
    There’s no better holiday to give a post-mortem on than Valentine’s Day. We take a look back at all the lunacy–the 50 Shades of Grey movie, Tinder, and the latest #Gamergate development. Elliot also dispels one of the greatest cultural myths of the last 15 years and, in a fit of brilliance, we figure out who the perfect person is to take over as The Daily Show host.
  • The Franchise Expansion Pack Edition

    9 Feb 2015 | 10:22 pm
    As Better Call Saul expands on the world of Breaking Bad, we discuss its premiere episode as well as the possible expansions of the Legend of Zelda and Hunger Games franchises. Also, Elliot helps Justin finally figure out the thing people have for Anna Kendrick.
  • The Get Motivated Edition

    3 Feb 2015 | 9:44 pm
    We’re a month into 2015 and haven’t even begun to reach our goals. Get motivated with us as we celebrate heroism (the New England Patriots Super Bowl XLIX Victory) and the best shows to come out so far this year (Galavant and Man Seeking Woman).
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  • The Funny Crazy Picture Gallery A Huge Medium of Creativity

    Kumiko kurosu
    17 Feb 2015 | 9:40 pm
    The line between crazy and creative is often a very thin one, and sometimes ideas are so different that it stays in one head for a long time. The culture of hanging out together is back once again and people are trying their level best to have a good time. On the other hand, there are difficult times when we really can’t create any good time for your own. That’s the easiest and witty way to get entertained is through funny crazy picture gallery. Although, maximum images certainly look quite ridiculous, but those pretty successful in making us happy. So maybe, we should take out our time…
  • Create Laughter Zone for everyone with Funny Images Gallery面白い画像ギャラリーとの皆のために笑いゾーンを作成

    Kumiko kurosu
    14 Jan 2015 | 11:58 pm
    Creating anything hilarious is a big job. It means nothing is easy because making people laugh is the toughest job of all. However; with dedication, passion for witty things and the diligence to create something unique can really make it big. In general, people often believe that being successful is god gifted. However, research states that it takes hard work, inner confidence and sheer diligence to become pretty successful. Nevertheless, if you are a photographer and want to create something unique and fabulous then create your own funny picture gallery that will not only display your…
  • Enjoy a cheerful Life with Funny Cartoon Images面白い漫画の画像と陽気な生活をお楽しみください

    Kumiko kurosu
    16 Oct 2014 | 3:35 am
    Can you make someone happy? Let him roll all over on the floor as he keeps on laughing constantly. Well, such desired skills are often practiced by cartoonist, comedians, jokers of circus. These people are professionals who make their living out of laughter, but now the time has arrived for the common man to make his family, friends and loved one hilariously happy. Especially the children at home requires special treatment from you as they are the most difficult to please. They’re swinging moods and playfulness often makes it difficult to understand them clearly. However; the kids have…
  • Elevate your Drab Mood with Really Funny Pictures本当におもしろ画像であなたのラブムードを高める

    Kumiko kurosu
    8 Sep 2014 | 3:02 am
    Nowadays the main topic of discussion among everyone is on how to keep stress at bay. Newspaper, magazines, TV, movies every kind of media is trying their level best to create awareness on the very bad effects of stress and diseases related to it. Top physicians are prescribing good diet, exercise and of course most important of all the pill of good laughter. In the busy schedule of everyday one tries to find the easiest way to gain happiness and it could be attained through really funny pictures showcased with medium of online funny web sites. The contemporary sector of fun has a new…
  • Funny GIF Images The Original Source Of Laughter笑いの面白いGIF画像オリジナルソース

    Kumiko kurosu
    11 Jun 2014 | 4:08 am
    An emotion defines human, animals and every other living thing. Well the whole world experience’s emotions of nature too along with rain, earthquake, Tsunami and like. Emotions are a way to show what we are feeling inside. The common sentiments like anger, sorrow, laughter, disgust and others are easily captured under our eyes.  Yet from time to time we all feel deprived of a sentiment called laughter. It is a widely accepted gesture that bond people together, spreads brotherhood, despite geological borders. So to keep it alive we get help from several creative sources like jokes,…
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  • Scumbag Alcohol sets the best challenges

    26 Feb 2015 | 12:23 am
    [source] Likes(1)Dislikes(0)The post Scumbag Alcohol sets the best challenges appeared first on CheesyPeasy.
  • Scumbag Alcohol convince you again

    26 Jan 2015 | 12:23 am
    [source] Likes(1)Dislikes(0)The post Scumbag Alcohol convince you again appeared first on CheesyPeasy.
  • Don’t trust Scumbag Alcohol

    26 Dec 2014 | 12:23 am
    [source] Likes(1)Dislikes(0)The post Don’t trust Scumbag Alcohol appeared first on CheesyPeasy.
  • Last Day on Earth

    19 Nov 2014 | 7:23 am
    [source] Likes(0)Dislikes(0)The post Last Day on Earth appeared first on CheesyPeasy.
  • Scumbag Alcohol does it again

    26 Oct 2014 | 1:23 am
    [source] Likes(1)Dislikes(0)The post Scumbag Alcohol does it again appeared first on CheesyPeasy.
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  • Grammy Winners 2015

    9 Feb 2015 | 3:26 am
    #ghantagiri |
  • ICC World Cup Merchandise

    1 Feb 2015 | 3:08 pm
    T-Shirts & Jerseys #ghantagiri |
  • How Weird News Get Made

    13 Dec 2014 | 12:50 am
    “Talk about a potty mouth,” jokes the New York Post. Jade Sylvester can’t stop eating toilet paper, and this is her story #ghantagiri |
  • Britain’s Hottest New Bar Is Inside a Public Bathroom

    13 Dec 2014 | 12:24 am
    A brilliant entrepreneur will debut a high-end, magical-sounding cocktail bar that just so happens to be located inside an old underground public restroom in trendy North West London. It's called Ladies and Gentlemen, of course, and while the grand reveal hasn't gone down just yet, the space is apparently a beauty to look at, with lovely, pre-WWII marble mosaic flooring and arched beams throughout #ghantagiri |
  • French inventor claims his pills make farts smell like chocolate

    26 Nov 2014 | 10:51 pm
    Christian Poincheval is a 65-year-old French inventor who has dedicated the past eight years of his life to making farts smell better. He claims that his Lutin Malin — which translates to "crafty imp" — line of pills ease digestion and "perfume" farts into smelling like roses or violets. #ghantagiri |
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    Wow Top 10

  • Cool apps for android you should not miss !!

    14 Feb 2015 | 5:35 am
    Today, is the time of choices. Everything in life has options and hence, making a decision is always an imperative task. To make your life simpler by tad bit, we bring to you this write up, which will help you choose your apps. The following list is of cool apps for android you should not miss which are very useful and are a must have for everyone.10. RecordenseRecordense is an audio recorder app with a modern touch. To begin with, this app lets you record audio in 3 diff qualities based on your preference. Furthermore, you can store and share your recording very easily. The app has options…
  • Top 10 romantic date ideas

    21 Sep 2014 | 10:26 am
    One online poet, on an obscure writes,I’m not against dating, I’m not against people being happy, I’m against pointless relationships because it’s a lot of time and no emotionsTrue! The purpose of dating is different to different people. The basic purpose is to find human warmth, love, a meaningful relationship that helps you grown, give, take, flourish and settle down with someone nurturing who is a friend, confidante, teacher, lover, … many roles rolled into one person. One way to find out if the person is your soul mate is to date them. If you like what you do…
  • Top 10 hairstyles for curly hair

    29 Aug 2014 | 11:31 am
    Curly hair itself is nature’s ornament to enhance looks, yet we want to experiment with it. Wear it in a different way, every day. Here are a few suggestions on how to enjoy what nature bestowed on you.Top 10 hairstyles for curly hairCoiled CurlsThese can be set into place by twisting around the finger and applying hair mousse. Or by using a curling wand. Always remember to use a product that protects hair from heat before applying the wand. Long Curls woven into a WaterfallDraw inspiration from nature and transform your hair into a work of art. Arrange the curls in a neat arrangement…
  • Top 10 worst serial killers

    23 Aug 2014 | 11:49 am
    Serial killers have been around for centuries now. Man and his mental disorders have never failed to give rise to situations where man can kill another man inhumanely and continue doing so without an ounce of regret. We are not putting the onus of a serial killer’s behavior on his health. But think for once, are these people normal. Isn’t there something grossly wrong with them.This list here is in no way a ranked list of serial killers. Nobody is above or below others. This is a simple list of top 10 worst serial killers of our times, who have killed mercilessly and without reason.10.
  • Top 10 date night ideas

    17 Aug 2014 | 12:23 am
    Date nights can sometimes get worrisome with all the planning and sometimes a wish to give surprises. What do you do every time, so that, things remain fresh and lovely? It may not look very easy to come up with a new idea for every date but what you don’t know is, even small twists to the regular ideas can make your date just perfect. Here is a list of top 10 date night idea, which will give you some options t jazz up the night and make the date special.10. Drink and DanceIf you both love clubbing, this can be your best shot at a wonderful date night together. Late nights, is the best time…
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    GiGi Eats Celebrities

  • Food Babe? More Like Food Bitch

    3 Mar 2015 | 6:06 am
    Hey babe, you know what’s really uncool? When you completely BLOW ME OFF because you’re “too busy”… No, no, no, I am not complaining about my “secret Valentine“… I’m actually complaining about another “babe” that most of you may actually know of… THE FOOD BABE. Are you ready for a bit of a rant? You may want to grab some energy-boosting chia seeds… Scratch that, you’ll probably need the fuel of a Thanksgiving FEAST to power through with me. So [Read On!]
  • Protein-Packed Crunchy Love Bites

    24 Feb 2015 | 8:16 am
    You know that one day of the year (that happened to have just past) where everyone showers their loved ones with flowers, candies and chocolate hot sauce in bed other gifts (ahem, how many of you got engaged and/or married on this day?)? Well I don’t get why showing your love for others is dedicated to only one single day of the year… Shouldn’t you be experimenting in the bedroom on the daily? You see, my Valentine’s Day wasn’t all that different from any [Read On!]
  • Meghan Trainor, HP and I #BendTheRules

    17 Feb 2015 | 5:29 am
    As scrumptious food bloggers, our lips are typically always moving because we’re constantly foodgasming over our latest unique and just plain brilliantly delicious kitchen creations. Paleo Eclairs… Balls of Cake… Fudgsicles… The noises I make on the regular when conceiving new recipes (ha ha, see what I did there?) probably have my neighbors thinking I am filming ANOTHER type of video… However… That is NOT the case and in fact today… My lips are moving because I am ALL ABOUT HP… HP? Humongous [Read On!]
  • You Deserve Applause!

    10 Feb 2015 | 5:41 am
    I would like to give all of you a round of applause! (Or I guess here… TWO Thumbs Up!) Why exactly? Well because… Some of you wake up at 4 am, run five to ten miles, cook up a protein pancake feast for you (and your family of six? ten? 15? Just you?), send everyone off with a healthy packed lunch (Suck it Subway!) and then you yourself trot on over to work in a sexy polished suit (or if you’re lucky, [Read On!]
  • Britney Spears is Drenched!

    3 Feb 2015 | 5:34 am
    EXCLUSIVE: Britney Spears has a new single coming out. Want to know how I KNOW this INSIDER information? Because I wrote the song for her!!! Check it out: Time to get my sweat on Work out in the gym, work out on the lawn Yes I pledge, yes I pawn Nope, this ain’t some sort of con I work out until I’m drawn And I build my brawn Then I go eat me a prawn You’re welcome. Bah ha ha… Yeahhhhh…. [Read On!]
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  • Sarcastic TGIF collection – A gallery of NSFW funnies

    6 Mar 2015 | 3:49 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersSarcastic TGIF collection – Disclaimer: While the following gallery of sarcastic pics has no other purpose but to entertain those adept of the genre, some of the language featured in the latter could be perceived as offensive to some and not be suitable for the work place (and we wouldn’t want to get you into any trouble would we!). Either than that, it’s all for fun, so if you’re not easily offended by strong language, please be our guests. Wishing you a wicked and fun PMSLweb moment! This post Sarcastic TGIF collection – A…
  • Thursday laughter – Your daily delivery of smiles

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:02 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersThursday laughter – After finally making it through hump day, you slowly acknowledge that the hardest part of the week (well for most) is now behind you. Your stress levels tend to drop slightly, although your intolerance to bullsh*t still reaches significant levels. Nonetheless, time to start spring cleaning your mind and treat yourself to a few smiles. Wishing you an easy-going PMSLweb moment! This post Thursday laughter – Your daily delivery of smiles appeared first on PMSLweb , home of the Internet Scavengers!
  • Funny dogs – When our canine friends take control

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:18 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersFunny dogs – Over the years, we often have dedicated posts to the glorious feline community, and have realized that we somehow unintentionally have been neglecting man’s best friend who is just as worthy! Our bad, and sincere apologies for that. Pinky promise that as from now, we’ll make sure to equally devote the time we allocate to our most faithful furry friends. Wishing you a giggle-tainted PMSLweb moment! This post Funny dogs – When our canine friends take control appeared first on PMSLweb , home of the Internet Scavengers!
  • Miscellaneous – A collection of interesting pictures

    2 Mar 2015 | 10:04 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersMiscellaneous – Ever since PMSLweb first “aired”, once in a while we enjoy dedicating a post to various kinds of miscellaneous pictures we stumble across while surfing the infinite world wide web ocean. Given that we have not had the occasion to do so yet since 2015 started, we thought that kick starting the week with a misc post could turn out to be a good idea. We somehow found the following pictures interesting, so here goes… Wishing you an interesting PMSLweb moment! This post Miscellaneous – A collection of interesting…
  • Funny Sunday pictures – Dominical giggles coming up

    1 Mar 2015 | 4:03 am
    PMSLweb - Piss Myself laughing - The Internet ScavengersFunny Sunday pictures – Fess up, if you could rate your Sunday, how lazy would the latter turn out to be? From a scale of 1 to 10, where would you situate yourself procrastination wise? If your first reflex today upon wake-up, was to switch on your computer before grabbing coffee, with no further plans scheduled beyond that point, then why not dedicate a few minutes into giving a peep to the following selection of daily funnies. Wishing you a laze-packed Sunday and chillax PMSLweb moment! This post Funny Sunday pictures – Dominical…
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  • Four Themes for Photographers and Photobloggers

    4 Mar 2015 | 8:00 am
    Maybe you’re working on a 365 project, with a photo for each day of the year. With a couple months under your belt, you might be looking for a new theme to showcase your work. Let’s check out four themes where the typography and color palettes step aside so that your photos get your visitors’ full attention. Cubic Made with photographers and photobloggers in mind, Cubic is eye-catching and bold out of the box. Its pleasing homepage grid showcases your posts’ featured images. Consider this subtle, almost ethereal application of Cubic at WE THE BIRDS, a site…
  • March Blogging U. Courses: Blogging and Photo 101

    Michelle W.
    27 Feb 2015 | 8:00 am
    Registration for March’s Blogging U. courses is now closed, and both courses have started. Check back later in the month to learn more and register for April’s offerings! Blogging 101: Zero to Hero — March 2 – 20 Blogging 101 is three weeks of bite-size assignments that take you from “Blog?” to “Blog!” Every weekday, you’ll get a new assignment to help you publish a post, customize your blog, or engage with the community. Whether you’re just getting started or want to revive a dormant blog, we’ll help you build blogging habits and…
  • New Theme: Lyretail

    Caroline Moore
    26 Feb 2015 | 9:00 am
    Happy Theme Thursday, all! Let’s dive right into a new free theme: Lyretail Designed by Mel Choyce, Lyretail is a stunning visual treat for your personal site. The theme puts your social presence front and center, displaying social links prominently below the site’s title and logo, so readers can easily find you on your favorite social networks. Secondary information, like a Custom Menu or Widgets, are tucked behind a convenient slide-down menu, while bold featured images grace the header, putting your photographs front and center. Read more about Lyretail on the Theme Showcase,…
  • WordPress for iOS: New Visual Editor and More!

    25 Feb 2015 | 5:03 pm
    WordPress for iOS version 4.8 comes with exciting editor and navigation enhancements. Visual Editor We’re thrilled to announce that the 4.8 release includes a beautiful new visual editor. With the new editor, you can add rich text like bold, italics, links, and lists naturally as you type. You can also insert images with a tap, seeing real-time uploading progress and images right in the post. Before New Editor App users have long wished for a “what you see is what you get” (WYSIWYG) editor on iOS. Until now, a rich mobile editing experience on the iOS app was reserved for those…
  • Five Themes for Poets (and Other Text-Loving Bloggers)

    Ben Huberman
    25 Feb 2015 | 8:00 am
    Over at The Daily Post, our first poetry-focused Blogging U. course, Writing 201: Poetry, has just entered its second week. It’s been a blast, with hundreds of poets sharing their work, experimenting with new forms, and commenting on their peers’ poems. After working hard on polishing their elegies, haiku, and ballads, most writers want to make sure their readers can enjoy their work to the fullest. This is where choosing the right theme can play an important role (this is true for non-poets too, of course): you want your posts to be readable, clean, and inviting. Here…
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  • Harrison Ford Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:18 pm
    Read the best of Harrison Ford quotes. Best Quotes by Harrison Ford, Actor. [after his first screen test] The studio read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    5 Mar 2015 | 5:33 pm
    Read the best of Goethe quotes. Famous Quotes by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Poet. To think is easy. To act read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Oprah Winfrey Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    4 Mar 2015 | 11:33 pm
    Enjoy the best of Oprah Winfrey quotes. Famous Quotes by Oprah Winfrey, Host. Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Thomas Jefferson Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    3 Mar 2015 | 9:53 pm
    Read the best of Thomas Jefferson quotes. Famous Quotes by Thomas Jefferson. Nothing gives one person so much advantage over read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
  • Francis Bacon Quotes

    Clever Cleverinski
    2 Mar 2015 | 11:26 pm
    Enjoy the best of Francis Bacon quotes. Famous Quotes by Sir Francis Bacon, Author. If a man will begin with read more » Get high on funny humor: Visit Humoropedia ©2013 Humoropedia Inc. Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this in your feed reader or on, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please email the site's url to *protected email*
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    I Hate Working In Retail

  • Meme Of The Day

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 2:45 pm
      Sourced from More From I Hate Working in RetailMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayZemanta The post Meme Of The Day appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • Fox News finally went off on Walmart for their shady practices. PSYCH.

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 2:00 pm
    This Fox News mash-up featuring Sean Hannity sheds a not-so-flattering light on how Walmart makes its millions. And while it’s clearly pieced-together clips, it highlights a pretty glaring hypocrisy. In all of Hannity’s contempt for working people and reverence for corporate giants like Walmart, he consistently fails to mention a few simple things:   #1: […] The post Fox News finally went off on Walmart for their shady practices. PSYCH. appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 20 More WTF Moments That Could Only Happen At Walmart

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 1:03 pm
    Everyday low prices…come with a price. 1. via macsonny     2. via Johnnyconcarne     3. via TripleEm     4. via ammolive     5. via massivecoiler 6. via PeopleOfWalmart     7. via Nugatorysurplusage     8. via TuboWare   9. via wildereye   10. via PeopleOfWalmart 11. via PeopleOfWalmart     […] The post 20 More WTF Moments That Could Only Happen At Walmart appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
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    I Hate Working In Retail

  • Meme Of The Day

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 2:45 pm
      Sourced from More From I Hate Working in RetailMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayMeme Of The DayZemanta The post Meme Of The Day appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • Fox News finally went off on Walmart for their shady practices. PSYCH.

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 2:00 pm
    This Fox News mash-up featuring Sean Hannity sheds a not-so-flattering light on how Walmart makes its millions. And while it’s clearly pieced-together clips, it highlights a pretty glaring hypocrisy. In all of Hannity’s contempt for working people and reverence for corporate giants like Walmart, he consistently fails to mention a few simple things:   #1: […] The post Fox News finally went off on Walmart for their shady practices. PSYCH. appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
  • 20 More WTF Moments That Could Only Happen At Walmart

    IHWIR Admin
    5 Mar 2015 | 1:03 pm
    Everyday low prices…come with a price. 1. via macsonny     2. via Johnnyconcarne     3. via TripleEm     4. via ammolive     5. via massivecoiler 6. via PeopleOfWalmart     7. via Nugatorysurplusage     8. via TuboWare   9. via wildereye   10. via PeopleOfWalmart 11. via PeopleOfWalmart     […] The post 20 More WTF Moments That Could Only Happen At Walmart appeared first on I Hate Working In Retail.
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  • absrdCOMEDY’s #MovieLyricals via #DeliciouslyEvilThursdays: The Top Picks

    Deliciously Evil
    6 Mar 2015 | 4:24 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor #DeliciouslyEvilThursdays is the place to be every thursday at 8pm EST hosted by @DeliciousEvil. Thursday was recently rocked by #MovieLyricals… Here are the top picks (the creativity was amazing – you really impressed us!): Take my hand And we'll never look back Secret love between us Only shared upon Brokeback #MovieLyricals — Jo (@Jorschach) March 6, 2015 Poor farm boy finds true love Dread Pirate Roberts must save his dove.. Kidnapping plan seems feasible? Inconceivable #MovieLyricals — magna…
  • Smart Watch To Include Old School Features

    Josh Triantafilou
    6 Mar 2015 | 4:06 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor After extensive testing, absrdCOMEDY determined smart watches, such as the Apple Watch, tell time — not only in hours and minutes, but down to the very second, sort of like a wristwatch. Such features have made the device popular among consumers, especially among smart people who need smart watches. “What I like about the Apple Watch is that it tells time and I can wear it on my wrist,” said Tom Bellino, a man standing outside the Seattle Apple Store in the rain. “It helps me organize myself, which is very important because my schedule is very…
  • Comedy Gym: Those Who Can, Do. Those Who Can’t Ask Stu: Vol.7

    Stu McCallister
    6 Mar 2015 | 2:56 am
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor Welcome to the another edition of ‘Those Who Can, Do. Those Who Can’t Ask Stu.’ Each edition I do my best to answer questions about comedy or life in general. Feel free to send any questions to I will do my best to enrich your life (or make you eat it on a extreme level). Thanks for reading. People can also ask questions about everyday things in life. I will try to answer in a non-jackassery way. No guarantees though. Question #1 Since online columnists like writing in lists, what are the 5 rules of comedy? –Jen D Answer I am…
  • absrdCOMEDY’s #CatSchmovies via @Schmovie: @nerdypodcast Top Picks

    5 Mar 2015 | 6:07 pm
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor SCHMOVIE, The Hilarious Game of Outlandish Films, from @GalacticSneeze! Sold at B&N, Amazon & stores nationwide. Schmovie hashtag games Mon & Thurs 11:11pm EST! Here are the top ten #CatSchmovies #HASHTAGorDIE tweets!!! Picked by @nerdypodcast The Last Temptations, Oh Christ! #CatSchmovies — Lyndon Bzdel (@cochise0808) March 3, 2015 Hairless and the Hendersons #CatSchmovies @Schmovie — T (@digitalb21) March 3, 2015 #CatSchmovies Diary of a Stimpy Kid…
  • absrdCOMEDY’s #Depressing80sFilms via #SockItTBTMe: The Top Picks

    Kaylee Bolduc
    5 Mar 2015 | 5:55 pm
    absrdCOMEDY - open source humor HEY #HashtagWarriors, sorry I’ve been a bit off my game this week and completely forgot to send in last week’s top 10 for #Depressing80sFilms. I guess I was SO bummed out by your amazing responses that I neglected my duties. So here it is, guys. Enjoy! You all did an amazing job. The Lost Boys #Depressing80sFilms — magna (@mentalerase) February 27, 2015 No Tax Return for the Jedi #Depressing80sFilms — Shaina (@ShainaSaid) February 27, 2015 Friday the 12th #Depressing80sFilms…
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    Peak Perspective

  • Don’t Rock the Boat (or Car or Truck)

    28 Feb 2015 | 7:57 pm
    When asked to make a list of my least favorite things to do, I’d likely answer in this order: — Walk barefoot across burning coals to prove my physical courage as a warrior and gain the approval of any ancient Native American spirits that still linger on my land, as they occasionally show their displeasure […]
  • I Have A Lot To Answer For

    21 Feb 2015 | 7:51 pm
    If I were to take a whack at describing myself in one sentence, it might sound something like: I have a zest for drama, a hunger for adventure, and a thirst for knowledge. Perhaps it’s a bit pretentious sounding, but not so much once you discover my zest for drama may be nothing more dramatic […]
  • Don’t Be Alarmed …

    14 Feb 2015 | 7:41 pm
    I am a time freak. Obsessed by the hours, minutes and seconds of my day, I am surrounded by the ever present notion that time is slipping away. And I am desperately grasping at those units of time with the same success as a giant Maine lobster trying to thread a needle. Not terribly successful. […]
  • Who Do You Think YOU Are?

    7 Feb 2015 | 7:39 pm
    Now that we’ve all gotten through that first (and some might say unbearable) month of the year, it’s a grand (and some might say painful) time to take a quick looksee backward to collect a few points of data. I call this month the time of RECALIBRATION because with all the frenzied excitement of December’s […]
  • Baby, Is It Cold Outside?

    31 Jan 2015 | 7:09 pm
    Midway between the winter solstice and the spring equinox up here in the Northern hemisphere, folks start to get squirrelly.   We’ve made it through the big eating festivals of Thanksgiving and Christmas, gushed forth an armload of inebriated promises to ourselves at New Year’s—swearing ‘change was on its way,’—and then we slogged through the […]
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    Robot Butt

  • No Way In Hell Mars Rover Reporting Alien Corpse

    Robot Butt News Corp.
    6 Mar 2015 | 4:48 am
    MARS – Wanting “nothing to do with this shit” the Mars rover Curiosity refused to report the discovery of an alien corpse to NASA Thursday.“Fuck no,” the rover said. “Fuck no, this is not happening. They say they program you for every possibility up here. Well, nobody programmed ‘rotting Martian protocol’ and I am not about to open this can of worms.”The decaying alien was discovered near the base of Mount Sharp at 5:42 p.m. eastern time on Thursday, though the Curiosity‘s olfactory sensors had picked up peculiarities some two hours…
  • Paleontologists Uncover Largest Dino Boner Yet

    Robot Butt News Corp.
    5 Mar 2015 | 1:16 pm
    COLUMBUS, Ohio - Calling the discovery a major breakthrough in our understanding of dinosaur reproduction, paleontologists from the Ohio State University announced Monday that the biggest dino boner ever reported had recently been unearthed in an eastern Wyoming dig site.Scientists working on the find told reporters that this remarkable finding could provide a rare insight into the reproductive cycle of dinosaurs, and may even result in proof that visible erections were once something to be displayed proudly, rather than discreetly tucked into waistbands or pant legs as they are now.Lead…
  • What Happened to You, Cookie Monster?

    Steve DiMatteo
    5 Mar 2015 | 4:06 am
    It smacked me right in the face as I entered the grocery store, like I walked square into an invisible wall. Greeting all shoppers was a large display of oranges, nothing that would typically seem out of the ordinary. But it was the heinous use of its pitchman, his face plastered on every bag, that made me lose consciousness for a moment.My God, Cookie Monster, what have they done to you?There he was, as plain as day, completely dissociating himself from the only thing he ever loved. I thought back to a few years ago, when Cookie Monster shamefully declared in various national settings that…
  • The Important Question About Mount Everest That No One is Asking

    Steve DiMatteo
    4 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    With hundreds of people scaling Mount Everest every single year, the campsites around the mountain have slowly become poop-infested nightmares. Apparently, all of the climbers ascending the mountain are too preoccupied with the thought of dying to scoop up their poop and haul it with them to the top.But all of that long-festering poop and urine has become a real problem for Nepal, as it’s becoming an environmental hazard, threatening to spread disease all over the place. But hey, if there’s one thing humanity knows how to do well, it’s ruining beautiful things. And with all…
  • The Cleveland Browns are Geniuses for Signing Josh McCown

    Steve DiMatteo
    3 Mar 2015 | 5:30 am
    The Cleveland Browns are the kings of mediocrity in the NFL, which is to say that, in very Cleveland Browns fashion, they’re just simply never bad enough.However, with the signing of 35-year-old journeyman quarterback Josh McCown, who will presumably start plenty of games for Cleveland, the team might finally be moving in the right direction.You see, McCown stinks to high heaven. Save for his miraculous 2013 season with the Chicago Bears, in which he threw 13 touchdowns to just one interception, McCown’s atrocious career stats over 12 seasons look like this: 48 touchdowns to 58…
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  • 23 Shocking Photos Reveal How Bad China’s Pollution Problem Has Become

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:04 am
    You won’t believe just how bad the pollution problem in China has become. China is the most populous country on the planet, and with economic growth rate at over 10% the environment is paying a heavy toll. Pollution in China remains largely  unchecked and as a result the country contains some of the dirtiest air in the world. Hence why people walk through the city wearing dust masks for protection against the thick clouds of smog. China is home to many polluted, unusable waterways, as well as swaths of garbage-infested land. These shocking photos reveal how bad China’s…
  • Brothers Grimm-Inspired Fairytale Landscapes Photographed By Kilian Schönberger

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:04 am
    German photographer Kilian Schönberger captures the dark Grimm Brothers vibe in his collection of landscape portraits titled, “Brothers Grimm’s Wanderings.” The series focuses on landscapes and buildings found throughout Central Europe. At first glance these buildings are mystical and foreboding, and when captured in a photo they conjure thoughts of faraway kingdoms and make-believe stories, as the child-like imagination buried within all of us sparks to life. On Schönberger’s official website he writes, “I think there is a deep longing for tranquil…
  • 26 Of The Coolest Hotels In The Whole Wide World

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    There are everyday hotels and there are extraordinary hotels. If you are going to pack up your possessions and travel to an exotic destination you might as well make it count by staying at an equally exotic hotel. The hotels on this list are extra special, as each aims to supply the most unforgettable week of your life. From underwater rooms to giraffe-infested hotels, these wondrous destinations offer the most outlandish features. Check out 30 of the coolest hotels in the whole world and get ready to experience some serious wanderlust! 1. Hotel Kakslauttanen, Finland Enjoy impressive…
  • Let’s Roam with Courtney Scott: A New Web Series

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:01 am
    Courtney Scott is known as the senior editor and on-air spokesperson with one of the top biggest travel companies in the world, Travelocity. Scott travels around the globe to various, exciting worlds in Europe and South America, for example. She is the host  of Travelocity YouTube Web Series, “Let’s Roam with Courtney Scott”, which appears every Wednesday at 11:00 AM/ET on YouTube and The first two episodes will focus on The Big Apple, or New York City, and Travelocity’s birthplace, Dallas, Texas. “With travel being our passion and our mission, we…
  • Beautiful Photos of Lake Superior

    6 Mar 2015 | 4:00 am
    Lake Superior is the largest of the Great Lakes of North America. The lake is bounded by Ontario and Minnesota to the north and west, and Wisconsin and Michigan to the south. It is generally considered the largest freshwater lake in the world by surface area. It is the world’s third-largest freshwater lake by volume and the largest by volume in North America.   The post Beautiful Photos of Lake Superior appeared first on
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    Pranks - WTFisdit

  • This Dog Discovers How To Drink Water

    5 Mar 2015 | 3:00 am
    Most pups have a tough time figuring out when someone is going to feed them or give them water. Thankfully this smart pup figured out how to drink water whenever he likes. Original Link: for awesome videos every day!: us on FACEBOOK: us on TWITTER: vids on INSTAGRAM: vids on VINE: TO WATCH NEXT:How to Feed Kookaburras:…

    4 Mar 2015 | 5:45 pm
    Yesterday’s episode: me make fun of everything! MERCH:

    4 Mar 2015 | 5:29 pm
    Download any audiobook for FREE! me make fun of everything! MERCH:
  • Canoe Fail Slowly Starts Sinking Into the Water

    4 Mar 2015 | 4:00 pm
    During riding a canoe down Black River Falls in Wisconsin, these river rats got into a little trouble when water started coming into the canoe. Original Link: for awesome videos every day!: us on FACEBOOK:<br />FOLLOW us on TWITTER: vids on INSTAGRAM: vids on VINE: TO WATCH NEXT:Monkeys Invade Kayaker:…
  • The Most Disgusting Man in The World!

    4 Mar 2015 | 2:35 pm
    Excuse me. I didn’t mean to burp and fart on purpose at the Santa Monica Pier. Watch JStuStudios Video►► Buy The Pooter here►► SUBSCRIBE!► FOLLOW ME!Twitter►►<br />Instagram►►
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  • Be Brave Enough To Live Life Creatively!

    26 Feb 2015 | 7:17 am
    Be brave enough to live life creatively The post Be Brave Enough To Live Life Creatively! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • Perks Of Dating Black Girls!

    20 Feb 2015 | 6:42 am
    Perks Of Dating Black Girls The post Perks Of Dating Black Girls! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • Oh Japan!

    16 Feb 2015 | 7:04 am
    Oh Japan! The post Oh Japan! appeared first on Punk'd.
  • Soviet Bear Say:

    16 Feb 2015 | 6:55 am
    Soviet Bear Say: The post Soviet Bear Say: appeared first on Punk'd.
  • No Fart In Car

    16 Feb 2015 | 6:53 am
    No Fart In Car The post No Fart In Car appeared first on Punk'd.
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  • Ello! In the trenches at London Fashion Week

    3 Mar 2015 | 6:52 am
    Reporting from Control Central, a.k.a. my “fashion war room”, as I like to call it, on London Fashion Week. Rapt without a blink for 5 days straight of a fashion-palooza of Fall 15 runway shows, a minimum of 5 browser windows open. Sustenance and props sit close by in the form of multiple salty snacks, a pink punk wig, lip balm, (an absolute necessity during high salt intake, 8 hours a day) coffee, dark chocolate and live streaming of, my favorite music channel. The first show had me chirping because they used reds and pinks in their design palette–my fave color…
  • The Mourning After: Black is A-L-I-V-E at NY Fashion Week | NY fashion week 2015

    24 Feb 2015 | 6:18 am
    I have been fascinated with death since I was a child. I grew up in a devout Catholic family, straight off the boat from 1960s Communist Poland. I would often hear my grandmother crying and lamenting over her sister who died of consumption and her “soul mate” husband, killed by the Germans. She had no qualms telling a five year old “I can’t wait to meet Jesus and be united with my sister and husband.” Death, normally a topic dismissed, was always a point of discussion in my family. Consequently, I am fascinated with the inevitable–death, heaven and God. The…
  • I Have a HEART ON for you: Love in an inflatable world | valentines day love story

    9 Feb 2015 | 1:55 pm
    Valentine’s Day is supposed to be a day when couples demonstrate to each other their affection via cards, gifts and food. Commercialism has dictated these customs and we’re reminded to follow closely via the media. I have always eased the minds of bygone boyfriends by assuring them that I don’t want to celebrate Valentine’s Day. It is a day that can make both parties terribly insecure and calls into question the nature of the relationship. Instead, this day should celebrate love. I can’t tell you how many times I have met men and women who ‘have…
  • Making a Blanket Statement at Couture Fashion Week 2015

    29 Jan 2015 | 6:39 am
    A new fashion item has been introduced into the fashion world bringing the way we dress to a new low. It’s a natural addition to the array of comfortable, shleppy staples that Americans have increasingly embraced over the past decade. What could this item be, joining the ranks of fleece hoodies, Ugg boots, outdoor pajamas, wearable bath towels and yoga wear? A blanket, of course! Yup, people are draping blankets over their shoulders, around their necks, wearing them outdoors in winter 2015. Why do you ask? Because they’re warm, comfy and elevated loungewear. After all, the Snuggy…
  • I love you more than a muppet’s amputated leg: A tribute to my BFF | best friend story

    13 Jan 2015 | 8:00 am
    That’s my BFF Mini and me dressed as Edith Beale, AKA “little Edie”, a socialite from East Hampton and first cousin of the late Jackie O’. She shared a decrepit, filthy mansion w/her mother and one hundred feral cats who used the entire mansion as one gigantic litter tray. Edith was eccentric,  ate dinner from a can and danced around her squalor waving an American flag with a sweater wrapped around her head fastened with a brooch. She actually thought it looked good and so did we. You an see for yourself in the movie GREY GARDENS, which is a bio about the Beale…
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    Noiseless Chatter

  • ALF Reviews: “Promises, Promises” (season 3, episode 6)

    Philip J Reed
    5 Mar 2015 | 5:45 am
    Long-time followers of this series (and this blog (…and me…)) know that shit happens. I’ll forget to schedule a post, I’ll run out of time to write something, I’ll get sidetracked by another project. The ALF Reviews series is something I really do try hard to keep up with, whether or not it looks that way on your end. I try…so hard. “Promises, Promises” represents a significant first, then. It didn’t go live last week when it was supposed to, but time, for once, wasn’t the issue. I had all of my screengrabs, all of my notes, and the…
  • Better Call Saul Reviews: “Alpine Shepherd Boy” (season 1, episode 5)

    Philip J Reed
    3 Mar 2015 | 6:15 pm
    Here’s something I didn’t expect to say before this show premiered: Better Call Saul has an incredible sweetness at its core. Remember, now, that this is a spinoff of Breaking Bad, where sweetness was not unknown but where it inevitably led to tragedy. What’s more, Better Call Saul is focusing on a character who was, in so many ways, an open facilitator of that tragedy. We met him in an Albuquerque of cynicism and despair, and he was at home there. Seeing him at work in “Alpine Shepherd Boy,” we are in a whole other world. A world in which shiftiness and…
  • Tickets for “Manos” The Hands of Fate on Sale Now!

    Philip J Reed
    27 Feb 2015 | 2:54 pm
    The live screening of the remastered / restored “Manos” The Hands of Fate is happening April 2, and you’re invited. All proceeds benefit The Trevor Project, and you’ll get to enjoy a great night out with a terrible movie and excellent conversation. Tickets are on sale as of today…and a few have already been sold! We need to sell quite a few more, though, in order for AMC to host the event. Think of it like a Kickstarter. You don’t get charged unless the event actually happens. By purchasing a ticket, even if you can’t make it, you’re helping the…
  • Better Call Saul Reviews: “Hero” (season 1, episode 4)

    Philip J Reed
    24 Feb 2015 | 6:24 pm
    It’s hard to believe Better Call Saul has only been on for four episodes. It feels as though it’s run for much longer. That’s an indication, I think, of just how effortlessly it slides into the vacancy left by Breaking Bad. It’s not a replacement in terms of subject matter — could Breaking Bad have devoted an hour of its precious time to squabbling over a billboard? — but in terms of quality, and the sheer amount of care that goes into every aspect of its production. Watching “Hero,” something struck me. When Better Call Saul was first…
  • Announcement: “Manos” The Hands of Fate Live, for charity!

    Philip J Reed
    22 Feb 2015 | 5:30 pm
    On April 2, I will be hosting a live screening of the remastered version of “Manos” The Hands of Fate in Denver, CO. It’s to benefit The Trevor Project, there will be oodles of Noiseless Chatter swag available, and your ticket includes admission to a private, online event centering on a screening of The Room. That’s right…even if you can’t make it out to Denver, you can buy a ticket, and have a hell of a time (while supporting a hell of a cause). Thursday, April 02 8:30PM – 10:15PM AMC Highlands Ranch 24 103 West Centennial Boulevard, Highlands Ranch,…
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    All Jolene

  • Add Another Candle to the Cake
    5 Mar 2015 | 1:23 pm
        I used to think a 40 year old was completely out of touch, half-dead, failing vision, frail body and totally lacking in any fashion sense. They only listened to music from twenty years ago and they probably peed their pants. In bed by 6pm and up at the crack of dawn. Crabby, stinky, wrinkled and most definitely OLD!! Today, I turn 40. While some of these things are true, thankfully, most of them are not. But, here are some signs I have noticed that say I am getting older… 1. My 10 yr. old gets embarrassed just by my presence. 2. I know (and love) bands that nobody has even heard…
  • When Monkeys Run The Zoo
    4 Mar 2015 | 1:56 pm
    It’s hard to play well with others when the others are soul sucking, incompetent mutants sent straight from hell. You know the type I am talking about. I guess some people refer to them as “the boss” but I have always used other names. It’s not like I don’t respect authority but, you’re going to have to give me something to respect. My last job honestly made me question whether I was in The Twilight Zone every single day. So, my job was to oversee the neighborhood and report any violations to “the boss”. Here is an actual conversation that took…
  • A Quick Guide to Shaking Hands
    3 Mar 2015 | 1:22 pm
      We’ve all experienced that moment when you shake someone’s hand and think to yourself; What the hell was that? It is a very simple gesture but it’s amazing how many people still get it wrong. Your handshake tells people what kind of person you are. Use this handy guide to ensure you aren’t giving off the “I’m a complete moron” vibe. The PROPER way to shake another person’s hand: 1. Stand tall and look the other person in the eye (if you are sitting, stand up!). 2. After the greeting (“Nice to meet you”, “Thank you for your…
  • 10 of the Most Dangerous Baby Toys Ever Sold
    2 Mar 2015 | 2:31 pm
        As parents, it’s our job to keep our kids safe in a world full of many potential dangers. But, how often is the danger found right in their toy box? Or, in the products we buy to keep them “safe” while they play? Keep on your toes, the threats are lurking everywhere. Here I thought lawn darts and the easy bake oven were all I had to worry about. Take a look at this list and you’ll see it is much more complicated than that.   Aqua Leisure Baby Boat When you picture a “boat”, something that floats usually comes to mind. Well, not this time. From 2002-2009, this baby boat…
  • Being A Princess
    1 Mar 2015 | 12:18 pm
    Girls make me laugh. We live on a college campus so I get a front row seat to watch the action. All I can say is, do these girls know how ridiculous they look? And, what exactly are they dressing up for? The typical look goes like this: 1) Hair: All done up with at least one can of aqua-net used. 2) War Paint: Applied as thick as they can get it. The more colorful, the better. 3) Nails: Long, bizarre colors and talon-like. 4) Jewelry: All blinged out like Mr. T. 5) Clothes: A shirt with the tits hanging out (no matter how cold it is). Jeans that look like they were painted on or a short,…
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    Daily Humour India

  • Secrets Unrevealed: What’s on a Woman’s Mind? Really!

    27 Feb 2015 | 8:38 am
    “Woman, you should speak out to me. How else would I know; what’s on your mind?” Heard this before? You’re not alone. So, here’s it is. What we – working, stressed out, multi-tasking, making-family-happy, tired women are actually thinking. You’ve been warned! DAY 1: Time: 8:00 PM Wife: Ah! What should I cook today? It’s ... Related posts: Ask DH: How toy Blow Your wife’s Mind and Becoming a Millionnaire 17 moms that rocked our worlds…Which one is yours? 12 hidden Harry Potter Secrets that will make you gasp! God Vs Mom : God – 0 | Mom – 1 Mallu…
  • Ekta Kapoor on a mission to convert the world into Hinduism: Pope Francis

    Lady Blah
    24 Feb 2015 | 6:32 am
    Vatican City, 24th February 2015: In a media statement released today, Pope Francis expressed his views that the main purpose of Ekta Kapoor was to convert their fan following across the world into Hinduism. He condemned that though her ways are simple, her intention behind creating Hindu-focused shows are not. He reaffirmed his statement with ... Related posts: Fawad Khan flees India after working with Sonam Kapoor! Ranbir Kapoor In Remake Of Fifty Shades Of Grey EXCLUSIVE: Rahul Gandhi to be sent to space in Interstellar like mission to reverse time We found the World’s Most Stressed…
  • Ask DH: Learn How To Beat Monday Blues… and, Discover ‘The Ultimate Question’!

    22 Feb 2015 | 9:15 pm
    This week’s Ask DH, is all about the tricks to that help beat your turbulent ‘Monday Blues’, and discover the absolute – “Ultimate Question”… Read on… Q) How to beat Monday blues? (Asked by Jazzy) Dear Jazzy, Good thing I read this on a non-Monday because had I read it on a Monday, I’d have ... Related posts: Ask DH: How toy Blow Your wife’s Mind and Becoming a Millionnaire How to write a Hilarious wishlist to Santa! Learn from Kids! The Ultimate Insulting Retort from a School Principal The Ultimate 2 Cows Compilation : Religion, Tech…
  • The curious case of ‘religion’ and other gravely important things – Part Two

    Lady Blah
    22 Feb 2015 | 5:23 am
    Note: This article is a Part Two of a two-part series titled “The curious case of ‘religion’ and other gravely important things”. For the first piece of the article click here. PK came to our planet, amidst a volatile situation, religious confusion, mindless believers and faithful slaves of so-called messengers of God. It wasn’t the ... Related posts: The curious case of ‘religion’ and other gravely important things – Part One 200 goats converted to unknown religion in Uttar Pradesh Days ahead of release ‘Finding Fanny’ finds more trouble Judge files case…
  • Now, that’s called Funny Cricket!

    Lady Blah
    21 Feb 2015 | 8:44 am
    This World Cup season, let’s refresh our memory of the most hilarious, historical moments of the religion called – Cricket! Spend your Saturday morning, rolling on the pitch, laughing it off! Related posts: When he reads, even the Bible sounds Hilarious! The curious case of ‘religion’ and other gravely important things – Part Two How to become lucky at gambling and date curly haired brunettes! Ranbir Kapoor In Remake Of Fifty Shades Of Grey WTF? Is this really a laughing rooster? Funny Table Tennis prank that makes you laugh!
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  • 6 Questions You Should Never Ask Your IT Guy

    23 Feb 2015 | 8:12 pm
    Sure, the IT guy (or gal) is not always the friendliest of the bunch.  But let's not make their job harder than it needs to be. Right?  Right...      1.) How do I turn this thing on?   Source   Take a few deep breaths and think this one out a little before making that call to the IT Department. Oh yea, you're pressing the button to turn on the monitor...not the computer.      2.) What's my password?    Source     Unless this is your very first time logging in, they won't know your password.
  • 7 Signs of a Bad Meeting

    16 Feb 2015 | 5:23 pm
    Meetings.  Some have more than others.  We all have too many.     1.) It starts at 11:30 AM.   Source   Doesn't anyone eat around here? It's called lunch.     2.) It starts at 4:00 PM.    Source     Doesn't anyone go home around here?      3.) Particpation is required.    Source   Hey, I didn't raise my hand did I? Move along.     4.) It involves a conference phone.    Source     Can't understand a word of what that guy is saying.  300 percent less likely to pay attention.     5.) It takes place
  • 7 Printers With Personality

    3 Feb 2015 | 9:19 pm
    Printers.  Sometimes you would swear they're just sitting there...laughing... quietly.       1.) Sorry buddy.  I know you miss it, but you can't go back to the 90's.   Source       2.) Being a bit dramatic, aren't we?    Source       3.) Wait...what?!    Source     4.) STOP STARING LIKE THAT!!    Source       5.) I've seen that movie too - still NO idea what this means.    Source       6.) Nice try.    Source       7.) I'm here for you.   Source      
  • 10 Vending Machines That Will Make You Laugh

    2 Feb 2015 | 9:22 pm
    Those of us in Cubicle Life seem to be in a very complex relationship with our vending machines.  Sometimes they give us (literally) a little moment of joy.  Other times...well...       1.) We've all been here haven't we?  At some point you really do have to take a stand.   Source       2.) OK.  Now we may be crossing the line.    Source       3.) This is deep.    Source     4.) I detect sarcasm.    Source       5.) Simply a coincidence?  I'm not so sure...    Source       6.) Probably not
  • Water Cooler Guide: 5 Phrases For Those That Didn't Watch the 2015 Super Bowl

    1 Feb 2015 | 9:23 pm
        Didn't watch the Super Bowl this year?  No need to worry, Cubicle Life has you covered. Simply utter one of the following five simple phrases to spark up interesting water cooler chat with one of the football fanatics at your office.  Just make sure to bail out soon after.  We don't want to get caught up into too many details anyways, do we?     1.) The Seahawks should have just run the ball.   2.) The sharks...OMG..did you SEE the sharks?   3.) So, is Missy Elliott back or what?   4.) Did
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    Don't Burn The Ribs

  • Cauliflower Rules!
    26 Feb 2015 | 11:47 am
    Yesterday I ate an entire cauliflower by myself— and I’m not even kidding At first I felt glutenous. I mean, who does that?  I blamed my indulgence on shrinkage (those flowerettes shrivel to nothing when you stick them in the oven for 40 minutes) but I then I realised I was only making excuses. I ate it all because I wanted to. It tasted good, so I ate it. To HELL with the cauliflower police! Even so, my lingering doubts and insecurities  made me check with my friend Google. She usually gives good advice. AND GUESS WHAT??  She tells me to totally have another. Turns out AN ENTIRE…
  • A Man and His Cape
    22 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    Spoiler Alert: This post has nothing to do with food and everything to do with lust. My youngest daughter, Leah, suggested I make my blog posts more “edgy” in order to achieve world domination in “blog land.” Apparently, sex sells. Who knew? I considered blogging about the booty craze, but since there’re only so many things you can say about Kim Kardashian’s ass, or anyone’s ass, for that matter, I decided to focus on something that’s actually crazy, sexy, hot—the cape—for men. I’m not taking about some metro-sexual, silky, Dracula…
  • Roasted Anything & Bacon Risotto
    15 Feb 2015 | 5:28 am
    I’m obsessed with risotto, roasted vegetables, bacon and wine (not necessarily in that order.)  Oh, and also, fresh parsley. I’m obsessed with other things too, but for the purposes of this post, let’s limited it to these five ingredients (recognising that “roasted vegetables” implies an infinite selection.) Risotto is the blank canvass of cooking. It absorbs any delicious flavour you throw its way and converts it into a masterpiece. Risotto is willing to slip into the background and let the add-ons take center stage. Pasta is more egotistical, less willing to…
  • Sedona’s Tokyo Madness
    8 Feb 2015 | 9:10 am
    When you come to Sedona you want to hike, you need to hike, because it’s the most beautiful place on the planet. Eating becomes secondary. You plan a full day—an “easy” hike in the morning followed by a leisurely afternoon of reading, followed by a late afternoon 2.5 hour Native American Teaching hike. You will gather information for your novel and you will be rich and famous and happy and ever so fit. At 9:30 you take your first step onto the red dust of Arizona, and you don’t look back. Your first ‘warm’ up hike is a vertical climb to the Kachina Woman…
  • Canadian BBQ
    1 Feb 2015 | 10:49 am
    There is nothing more dedicated, more determined, than the Canadian BBQ-er.  While those of us south of the border are often content to wait until the spring for that chargrilled goodness, the Canadian knows that the spring never really comes.  If you don’t Carpe Diem, you may never Carpe. The Grill My brother Roy knows how to tame a Canadian grill and generally subscribes to my father’s “Just warm ‘er up” rule of beef preparation. But where my father settled for a slice of Sobey’s pre-packaged sirloin, Roy lassoes massive hunks of the finest cuts of…
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    funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way

  • This Is How You Can Make Ice Cream In A Bag

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:10 pm
    This really is a fun idea to do with the family and also teaches you how Ice Cream is made. Watch and learn, it looks easy and also tasty! How To Make Ice Cream In A BagThe post This Is How You Can Make Ice Cream In A Bag appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • These Are The Most Beautiful Places In Latin America

    5 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    Here you can see for yourself which are the best and the most beautiful places in latin America. As spring is coming let’s get in the mood with some of those amazing pictures of the most beautiful places in latin America.The Most Beautiful Places In Latin America The post These Are The Most Beautiful Places In Latin America appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • These Two Guys Are Pushing The Plastic Duck Beyond It’s Limits

    4 Mar 2015 | 11:10 pm
    I thought those things were meant for kids only, aaaand i was right! This is why you shouldn’t get in a big plastic duck meant for kids only and start enjoying the ride like a maniac, like these 2 guys do. The Plastic Duck Is Meant For Kids OnlyThe post These Two Guys Are Pushing The Plastic Duck Beyond It’s Limits appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • This Is How Celebrities Would Look Like If They Were Fat

    4 Mar 2015 | 11:00 pm
    A spanish photoshop artist has made some famous celebrities to look like they have put on tons of weight! Have you ever wonder how those tv celebrities would look like very very fat? Here is the answer.#1 Michelle Keegan #2 Kim Kardashian #3 Katy Perry #4 Karen Gilian #5 Jennifer Lawrence #6 Gabrielle Monique #7 Emma Watson #8 Carly Rae Jepsen #9 Becky Lynch #10 Park Shin Hye The post This Is How Celebrities Would Look Like If They Were Fat appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
  • These Are The Most Creative Ads That Will Surely Attract Your Attention

    3 Mar 2015 | 11:10 pm
    Pff, we all hate advertisings, but we have to admit that sometimes ads are made very clever and put into the right place at the right time to attract our attention in order to buy the product! Yes, we are all tricked, but sometimes we are tricked in a clever and creative way! Here are some of the most creative ads ever.The Most Creative Ads The post These Are The Most Creative Ads That Will Surely Attract Your Attention appeared first on funny images and videos, picdumps and fun all the way.
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  • The Woman On The Left Made Us Laugh So Hard!

    Amazingator Staff
    2 Mar 2015 | 5:30 am
      Julie Mason came into our offices last Thursday, with the most incredible story – incredibly funny, that is. By the time she was done telling it, we were all practically on the floor, laughing so hard our eyes nearly popped out. Please share so everyone learns about this. Want More? Give us your E-mail! Please! Subscribe The post The Woman On The Left Made Us Laugh So Hard! appeared first on Amazingator.
  • Leaked Photos Suggest: House of Cards Season 3 To Star Kevin Spacey

    Amazingator Staff
    25 Feb 2015 | 6:42 am
    With season 3 of House of Cards almost upon us (February 27), leaked photos from the third season have now all but confirmed: Kevin Spacey is in it, probably in a starring role. House of Cards, developed by Beau Willimon, has been a phenomenal success for Netflix, with multiple Emmy and Golden Globe awards. While the source of this latest leak is unknown, sources close to Netflix have assured us that this is likely NOT an inside job. “House of Cards is tremendously important to us”, they said, “And we want everyone to enjoy it on the same day – February 27. If you…
  • “American Sniper” To Get A Reboot Next Year; Justin Bieber To Star

    Amazingator Staff
    22 Feb 2015 | 4:38 am
    Photo: Warner Bros. / Bigstock – Joe Seer   Clint Eastwood’s “American Sniper” was one of this year’s surprise successes – both with the critics and at the box office – and Hollywood is paying attention. “By this time next year, most of the film’s audience will have aged by one year”, says one of the new film’s producers. “It’s time to introduce a younger generation to Chris Kyle’s amazing origin story. And what better way to appeal to that generation – than with Justin Bieber?” Bieber is…
  • Suburban Hero: Jamie Saves Baby From A Fire She Had Started

    Amazingator Staff
    20 Feb 2015 | 5:49 am
    Illustrative photo of Jamie   Brookhaven, AtlantaLocal cashier Jamie Swinton (46), is now a local hero of her quiet American suburb, after rescuing one-year-old Baby Mark from a horrible fire in his house. Questioned by our correspondence, Jamie was eager to go over Tuesday’s events. “After starting the fire with some gasoline and a box of matches, I realized the house was going to burn up pretty quickly. “I had to push his mother out of the way”, she adds, “she was practically hysterical when she saw me light up her house, and tried to keep me away from…
  • Fifty Shades of Grey Reimagined As Vegetables

    Amazingator Staff
    14 Feb 2015 | 8:29 am
    Movie Photo: Universal Pictures Fifty Shades of Grey is a worldwide erotic phenomenon, with a book trilogy and a movie. Vegetables (and fruit) are also an erotic phenomenon. Why not combine the two? 1. “A tremor runs through my whole body. I am naked, in a bath with Christian Grey. He’s naked.”    2. “I am going to tie you to that bed, Anastasia. But I’m going to blindfold you first and,” he reveals his iPod in his hand, “you will not be able to hear me. All you will hear is the music I am going to play for you.”   3. “There are shackles attached at…
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    Green Milk

  • 13 Times Michael Keaton Was Thinking About Birds When He Should Have Been Doing Other Things

    Philip Likos
    24 Feb 2015 | 1:50 am
    Birdman? More like Birdfan. He just can't help himself. Whether it's over his morning coffee, or as he lies shivering in his girlfriend's sweet embrace, Michael Keaton simply can't stop thinking about birds.  Though not often caught on film, here we have 13 classic moments in which Micael Keaton was thinking about birds, when really he should have been doing something else. That time he was supposed to be thinking Bruce Wayne things, but was wondering why birds can't have the same rights as people instead.   That time he was supposed to be doing an interview, but instead remembered the…
  • 6 Things We Learnt From The Death Of Lucy Beale

    Philip Likos
    20 Feb 2015 | 2:46 am
    In what was perhaps the most thrilling piece of television to ever have happened in the whole Universe, last night saw the long awaited revelation of Lucy Beale’s killer. Akin to Darth revealing he’s Luke’s father and Bruce Willis being dead inside the whole time, you are probably still recovering from the biggest shock of you life. If you’re anything like me then your mind is awash with a whole heap of unanswered questions  – what was Bobby Beale holding? How could that tiny little orphan overpower a grown woman? Is this some practical joke for Comic Relief?
  • Green Milk #1 Tony Law Was Wild!

    Gene Simmons
    8 Feb 2015 | 5:53 am
    Well, what happened?! We don’t quite know! We put on a comedy night and then people came and the comedians came and everyone had a great time and went home.   We were not expecting that kind of success from our first night and were well and truly blown away by quite how amazing the turn out was. We want to thank everyone that turned up and supported us we had a well and truly amazing time. How about you? Did you enjoy it? Let us know in the comments below!   In the mean time check out a few snaps from the night!             To see our full gallery…
  • The Green Milk Challenge – Day 30

    Gene Simmons
    7 Feb 2015 | 3:37 am
    I know what you’re all thinking. Did Robign die in those 7 days that he went missing for? Did he always have a silent ‘g’ in his name? Did Amelia Earhart really discover America after being told to avoid the Bermuda Triangle by Stonehenge?   Well let’s start at the end and work our way back.   1. Yes. It is a little known secret that Amelia and Stonehenge were really good friends who text each other like alllllllll the time. And as we all know Stonehenge made the earth so of course it knew about America before everyone else did. So one day Stonehenge was…
  • The Green Milk Challenge – Day 23

    Gene Simmons
    7 Feb 2015 | 2:36 am
    It’s every young boy’s dream to play for their favourite football team – to smell the crows and find fish deep in the wells of their hearts. But for most children this never happens.   Instead they end up going to a big scary high school where they develop insecurities in droves. Red brick buildings where they watch their peers’ faces seem to slowly grow longer and uglier by the day and their bodies under go changes known as ‘publicity’. They find subjects that they’re good at, or are tormented by the lack of an intellectual faculty and get…
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    The People Pleaser

  • Hardly Homeless, However a Home Has not been Had

    The People Pleaser
    1 Mar 2015 | 12:10 pm
    How important is it to have a place to call home? Is a home more than just the people that occupy it? How much importance and real value can a physical location hold?These are questions I ask myself after speaking to people who have a place to call home - whether it be the house they grew up in, or just the town or city. They have one place that holds the vast majority of their memories, friends and family. Consequently, it also holds a great deal of importance to them and always offers a comforting feeling of familiarity and safety. I personally don't have this and this leads me to the…
  • Contemplating the Conceded yet Contented Countenances of Commuting Citizens

    The People Pleaser
    23 Feb 2015 | 1:11 pm
    I unfortunately spend a lot of time on public transport travelling to and from work. What I can't help but notice is the number of strange folk that occupy these moving sweat boxes every day. Don't get me wrong, not everyone is totally obscure. There are a few "normals" - students, people on their way to work, some travellers. But thrown into this mix are some really odd characters. I don't quite know what compels these strange people to populate every empty space in a train, tram, subway or bus. You would think they would just lock themselves up indoors - away from the cruel and…
  • Dissecting the Determinants of Self-Destructive Desires

    The People Pleaser
    13 Feb 2015 | 2:37 pm
    Today I'm considering the phenomenon of craving certain self-destructive behaviours and whether this is driven by an urge to indirectly harm one's self, or is driven by other urges that promote behaviours which happen to be self-destructive. In my last post, I commented briefly on masochistic behaviour and its relation to unnecessary suffering. Once again, here I'm talking about lesser forms of suffering. I'm not talking about real suffering, but first world issues that we create in lieu of real problems. This post is not meant to be a generalisation, but an analysis of a part of…
  • Searching for a Stance Somewhere between Selfish and Selfless

    The People Pleaser
    10 Feb 2015 | 1:15 pm
    A topic that plagues me often, especially as a people pleaser, is how far to push for my own interests before it becomes negatively selfish. In this post I'll use the two terms selfish and selfless to describe the opposing directions that one can take in any decision. They are merely used to describe the direction, and not to allude to any positive or negative connotations on their own. I tend to voluntarily put myself last in most situations, likely as a means of appearing kind and selfless. On the surface this may seem mildly noble, but it's really not. In reality it's done for…
  • Seething at a Summons to Screw Shelves onto Straight Structural Surfaces

    The People Pleaser
    1 Feb 2015 | 5:37 am
    Today I'm just going to rant a little bit. Putting up shelves is a pet hate. This is a preferable use of a power drill. I fucking hate putting up shelves. I have no idea why I hate it so much or why I feel like divorcing my wife every time she even glances at a blank space on the wall. I mean, it's really not that big a deal. All you do is measure and mark a couple of targets, ensuring that they're level, get the hammer drill out and make a couple of holes. Then it's just a quick IKEAesque assembly and you're done. No problem, right?Right. But I still fucking hate it. I don't mind…
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    Viral Junkie

  • Girls And Nutella On A Banned Commercial, Watch To Know Why!

    24 Feb 2015 | 11:32 am
    The post Girls And Nutella On A Banned Commercial, Watch To Know Why! appeared first on Viral Junkie.
  • When 50 Artists Collaborate For The Coziest Kitchen In The World!

    22 Feb 2015 | 7:06 am
    This wouldn’t be the first time we’ve seen a kitchen made out of non-kitchen materials, but it might be the cuddliest version yet. Constructed by fifty artists for last July’s Jumpers and Jazz Festival at Australia’s Warwick Art Gallery, the domestic scene featured a full kitchen completely cocooned in bright swaths of knit and crocheted ... The post When 50 Artists Collaborate For The Coziest Kitchen In The World! appeared first on Viral Junkie.
  • One Officer Saved Hundreds Of Suicidal People At The Golden Gate Bridge

    21 Feb 2015 | 10:17 pm
    The Golden Gate Bridge is an iconic landmark of San Francisco. It’s also, sadly, one of the most popular places in the world to commit suicide. Few know this better than Kevin Briggs, a sergeant with the California Highway Patrol. Briggs talked hundreds of people out of committing suicide off the bridge, preventing them from ... The post One Officer Saved Hundreds Of Suicidal People At The Golden Gate Bridge appeared first on Viral Junkie.
  • Blowing Bubbles In The Cold Seems Impossible…But The Results Are Incredible

    21 Feb 2015 | 6:02 pm
    Cold winter months don’t seem like the optimal time for bubble blowing, right? Soap bubbles bring back memories of playing in the backyard in shorts and t-shirts…not bundling up and staying inside. However, as YouTuber SimonSaysBaka found out, blowing bubbles in freezing temperatures creates something amazing. The water in the soapy mixture freezes into gorgeous ... The post Blowing Bubbles In The Cold Seems Impossible…But The Results Are Incredible appeared first on Viral Junkie.
  • Most Of People Wouldn’t Like To Live Here, But Others Do For A Good Reason.

    21 Feb 2015 | 6:17 am
    In the foothills of West Virginia exists a town where it’s illegal to own any electromagnetic device. That means there’s no cell phone reception, Wi-Fi, radio, or television. Why would any place do something like this…and not be Amish? Simply put, this town exists to observe the wonders of space. Only here will you find ... The post Most Of People Wouldn’t Like To Live Here, But Others Do For A Good Reason. appeared first on Viral Junkie.
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  • 30 Hilarious Pictures To Prove That Cats Are Made From Liquid

    Lauren Davidson
    6 Mar 2015 | 2:52 am
    We already know that cats will rule the world one day, right?! And, if you want yet another reason to believe this theory, get ready to be shocked when you see that cats have another supernatural power to add to the very, very long list. You might not believe us, but cats can turn themselves into liquid form. Yep, that’s right… more powerful than any super-hero you’ve ever seen, some cats have the amazing ability to defy the law of physics and transform themselves into liquid. If you still don’t believe us, you need to check out these 30 hilarious pictures that will…
  • Scientific Facts Of Attraction

    Marie De Jesus
    5 Mar 2015 | 11:32 pm
    Why is it that we find some people hot while others, eh, not so much?  If you can’t figure it out, there are actually scientific facts behind your attraction. #1 The Golden Ratio Based on a 2010 study, faces were most attractive when features were set apart based on particular ratios. #2 Face Symmetry You will probably be more attracted to a face that is symmetrical.  All over the world, facial symmetry is thought of as a sign of beauty because it signals good genes for reproductive health. #3 That Time of the Month When a woman is ovulating, she is more likely to find a masculine man…
  • Heavenly Ways To Use Sriracha On Just About Everything

    Marie De Jesus
    5 Mar 2015 | 9:58 pm
    Because you know, sriracha on just about everything is just heavenly! We even cook so we can have some scriracha.  Also, if you’re the adventurous type, you might also like these genius ways to use Flamin’ Hot Cheetos on food! #1 Grilled Lobster Tails with Sriracha Butter From Laffomatics. #2 Sriracha Chex Mix From PopSugar.  Looks like Chex is a favorite ingredient for any snack.  Check out this crunch ramen snack mix with Chex! #3 Twisted Eggs and Toast From Breaking Heels on Unsolid Ground. #4 Sriracha Turkey Meatballs From Katherine Martinelli. The post Heavenly Ways To Use…
  • The Best Basics For Your Closet

    Domonique Link
    5 Mar 2015 | 8:54 pm
    If you’re wondering what clothing you can’t live without–we’ve found it!  Here are the best basics for your closet.  Basics are clothing essentials that never go out of style– you’ll always need them for something and they pair well with trendier items.  Ladies, you can’t live without these 15 items: 1. A great white t-shirt It doesn’t get any more classic than a white t-shirt. The best styles are super soft and have a relaxed, lived-in fit. A crewneck cut is a no-brainer, but we also like a V-neck style because it’s a little sexier and the…
  • Foods You Had No Idea You Could Freeze

    Domonique Link
    5 Mar 2015 | 7:12 pm
    If you ever suffered the pain of having to throw food away because it didn’t get eaten, you’ll love this post.  Did you know that there are a LOT of foods that you save for later on down the road–just by putting them in your freezer?  It’s true!  Here are 15 foods you had no idea you could freeze. 1. Eggs Really? Who would have thought? Crack the eggs in a freezer bag, and freeze. Or crack eggs into an ice cube tray for cakes and cookies. Thaw out in refrigerator and use as you normally would.  2. Bread and baked goods When your favorite bread is on sale, stock up…
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